So I'm a 31 year old mum of 4 and have breast fed...
So I'm a 31 year old mum of 4 and have breast fed them all. I actually gained volume after feeding my 3rd baby, but after my 4th I lost it all again :-( I was up to a very very full C or even D cup while I was feeding, and now I don't fill up a C cup, so I'm presuming I'm a B (just wearing C's cos I can't find bras that feel and fit right so I'm not wasting my money buying new ones). I'm very self conscious about the floppiness off them, I don't like to bend over as they seem to lose and boob-like shape and just... well I can't even explain it. They look yuk.
I've booked in with my PS who did my recent tummy tuck. He's a man of few words, but is apparantly excellent at what he does. He knows what I want and what I don't want so I feel pretty confident that he can help me achieve what I want, which is nice natural looking boobs with a bit of upper pole fullness which I'm currently lacking. I had my photos taken, got measured for a bra and played with sizes. I've gone for 310cc - 350cc, but prepared to go higher if that's what is needed.
He has chosen to go over the muscle, the reason for this is because I have a fair amount of droop and if he was to put it under the muscle, my breast tissue will apparantly hang off the implant. They will be inserted at the fold line.
I haven't told anyone about this, nor am I going to, it's no ones business but mine and my husband who only talks about boobs these days!
So that's where I am at the moment. I have to go in and pay for it next week. I'm getting my nose done at the same time so I'm not looking forward to the recovery!
I will post some before pics if I can work up the courage
I went to the bank today
Today I went to the bank and this afternoon we are going in to pay the deposit and pick up my PO bra.
Speaking of bras, I went shopping today. I looked at bathers and bras. There's so much nice stuff out there at the moment, I wish I knew what size to get! Won't be long and I'll be able to go proper bra shopping :-D eeeek! I did buy some new clothes though (yay!)
I've just paid my anaesthetist fee, was quite a bit lower than I expected! Now I've got more to spend on bras when I'm allowed to. Now I just need to fill out my health questionnaire and sign the consent form and I'm good to go. I paid my deposit last night and picked up my bra... I haven't taken it out of the box yet... I feel if I take it out of the box, it makes it all real :-/
finally some before photos
finally some before photos
Finally, I'm happy! I'm happy with my choice of size, I'm happy with my choice of position, let's hope I'll be happy with the results! I'm so happy I'm finally happy!
1 week to go! I can't believe I'm actually doing this!
Let the nesting begin
with 4 days before surgey, this week is going to consist of cleaning, scrubbing, washing, ironing and anything else that gets in my way! I have my little 2 year old on the vacuum cleaner as we speak :-)
Has anyone got a list of stuff that I should take with me? Or stuff to have at home after the op? I'm totally clueless!
Still haven't taken the post op bra out of the box... I suppose I should do that and see if it fits :-/
finally got the bra out the box
finally got the bra out the box, so now its real
Anatomic or round?
I've been doing some research and now I'm scared. My surgeon told me he's use anatomic high profile over the muscles. Well I'm happy with the high profile and over the muscle part... but I've just read that anatomic are textured which can lead to rippling and they can also turn over in their pocket. Has anyone got any advice or experience?
Just had a visit with my PS
So after my anatomic vs round debate yesterday, I went and saw my PS and decided to go with the round. He says he never uses the tear drop shape unless its with a breast reconstruction. He did say that my breasts are not that of a typical 21 year old (although I'm 31) but I don't think my breasts need to be reconstructed, just refilled.
So there we have it, I'm going round cohesive 345cc over the muscle. Done.
Now I just have to wait.
I don't think I can do it
I think I've made the wrong choice. My husband made me some flour sizes this morning and the 345 (what I chose) is too big! It makes me look top heavy. I told him to lower it to 300 and loved that look. My surgery is tomorrow and it's too late to change. I don't think I can go ahead with the 345. I think I have to cancel.
I just cancelled
I just got a call from my PS and he said he can't get new implants in for tomorrow and because I'm so unsure, he said my best bet was to cancel. So I did. He wants to be sure that I'm sure. He was very helpful on the phone and said to come in so we can work it out. As strange as it sounds, I'm so relieved that I've cancelled. I'd rather give myself some more time and be sure of my decision.The flour testers may have been an inaccurate guide I know, but he told me how to make some accurate sizes so I'll do that. And if I fail at that, I'll go in to his offices and try on some real sizes. My biggest fear was to go too big, like an obvious difference. I don't want a lift as such as a good bra can do that, I just want more volume so I can fit in a bra/bathers properly, without the fear that I'll fall out when I bend over. I think a 300cc will give me enough volume to achieve that.
Positives to come out of this, my house is real clean, my washing is up to date and I'm all tidy and groomed. lol.
Thanks for all your kind words. It means a lot to me xx
I have a new date, 21st Jan... now I'm getting nervous all over again!
I need help
With the fake part if it all... How do you get past that feeling of being fake and that you're not really you anymore?
I look at my boobs without a bra and I think gee it will be nice to have some volume in there. Then I think how fake I will be. when I look at pics of all you guys I don't think fake, so why do I think it of myself? I know I'll still be me, but this fake part is really bothering me to the point where I'm not sure i can go through with it. Did anyone else struggle with this? How do I get past it? My husband keeps saying its like people having hair extensions, fake nails, fake tan etc, but I feel it's more than that. Help!
Where do I start...? At this stage, I think I've decided not to go ahead with the implants. Why? Well...
No. 1- I'm stressing too much about the size. I'm a large B/small C at the moment and I'm ok with that. It's the sagging that I originally wanted filled up, and to do that, I feel I will end up too big for my frame, one of my biggest fears.
No. 2- I don't really want the financial commitment of having to maintain boobs. If I need a revision, it will probably cost me a fair bit (don't know the surgeons policy for revisions, I will ask when I go back to see him). If it was every 10 years then I'd be fine with it, but that can't be guaranteed.
No. 3- I know I will constantly worry about a rupture and I really don't want to have silicone seeping trough my body. I'm also worried about capsular contraction and rippling. (Yes I'm a worry wart and I can't help it)
No. 4- I know I don't want them forever and before I've already got them, I'm thinking about how long I'll keep them for and getting them taken out.
Lately I have found myself over at the implant removal section and totally relating to what some people have been talking about, which I find weird as I haven't even got implants!
However, I do want to feel more confident in my body and in bras and clothes, but I wonder if a good fitting bra could help me with that? It would definitely be the cheaper option, and I haven't even tried finding a decent bra since I stopped breast feeding.
So from going over my wants and my don't wants, my don't wants outweigh my wants which has brought me to the conclusion that perhaps I'm not ready to take this leap yet. What are your thoughts?
So this is me...
I've been thinking long and hard about this. I don't think I'm ready. Its been such a quick process that I feel I should give myself a bit more time to think and try and accept my body for how it is and what it's been through. I have an appointment with my surgeon today to discuss my questions before making a final decision on what I'm going to do. I've added some photos in hope of some opinions/feedback, like should I be happy and accept myself or is it fair that I feel something needs to change? Thanks girls.
I cancelled again
Hi all. I had my appointment yesterday and told him I just wasn't sure about it all and that I don't feel I should go through with it at this stage. He was totally supportive in saying that I've made the right decision as its purely cosmetic and you need to be sure. He wrote me out a cheque as I'd already paid for it before my previous cancellation. I'm going to work on accepting me as I am for a couple of years and I know the option is always there if I don't succeed. I'm seeing things in a different light at the moment for which I'm grateful for as its saved me a lot of money. I wish everyone out there the very best of luck with their recoveries and up coming surgeries. I hope your new boobies will bring you the happiness that you are looking for. Thank you all for your support throughout this process, it has been very much appreciated! Xx over and out :-)
28 Mar 2014
2 months post
So here I am again, I re-opened the boogie book. I knew I would :-) I was giving myself the summer months to see if I could accept my body. Looking back on my summer holiday photos and my boobs were the only thing I'm not happy about, we I'm going to fix it. I still have all of my previous concerns, but I'm going to give it a try and if it's not for me, I'll take them out. No big deal. I'm going back to my surgeon to decide sizes again, but I'm pretty sure I'll go the same as last time, 300cc (or less) cohesive textured over the muscle. If anyone has any thoughts on this, please share :-) I wears going to do it next month, but I've rescheduled for June as it will suit me and my family better.