B( . )( . )BIES!

Well, I've been thinking, researching, planning, and hoping for about 7 years. I'm finally taking the leap. My surgery is scheduled for Monday morning at 6:45.

I am 5' 1 1/2", 110lbs, 42 yrs old. I have two children that I breast fed. I'm tired of my boobs looking like empty balloons. I'm ready for the goddess body that matches my goddess mindset.

I've chosen 339 cc silicone implants, to look like the 304 cc silicone sizers I took home and liked.

First of all, the staff at my PS's office is wonderful. They really make every patient feel like they are the most important patient on the schedule.

During my call, they confirmed my medical history, confirmed my surgery time, type, implant size and type, and incision location.

They reminded me to shower with antibacterial soap the night before, then no food or water after midnight (no mints, no gum, noting). They reminded me to be sure I sleep on sheets washed in OxyClean or bleach and to be sure and wear pants that are ready to put on and a shirt or jacket that does up the front.

They asked if I had any final questions, which I didn't. And then they very cheerfully said they'd see me Monday morning at 6:00.

I went grocery shopping and bought all my favorites. I also get an organic farm share from a local farm, which I picked up this morning. I always make our food from scratch, so all this week I made more than we could eat at every dinner and froze the leftovers for post-surgery.

In particular, I made a wonderful soup for the night of my surgery. Here's how I did it:

Healing, Pain Relieving, Antibiotic Sweet Potato and Butternut Squash Soup (and in honour of Breast Cancer Awareness Month - nearly every ingredient I chose is well known for being a cancer preventative.)

Start with a broth. (about 6 cups) I made mine from scratch & used an organic, locally pasture raised chicken I got from the farmer's market, but you can also use pre-made vegetable or chicken broth. The chicken does have benefits and a purpose in this soup, so if you are not a vegetarian, I suggest using organic chicken broth.

Cut up a couple of butternut squash (remove seeds) and a couple of sweet potatoes (sweet potatoes are one of the rare produce that it is fairly safe to eat non-organic) into cubes. You can remove the skin of the potatoes or not. I like the skin, so I left it on.

Boil them in the broth until they are moderately soft, then smash them just a bit, but not too much. Leave the soup a little chunky.

Then add about a TBSP turmeric, about a tsp ground cloves, and salt to taste. (I'm just guessing. I don't measure. I just dumped in however much looked good to me.) You can also add cinnamon. I didn't, because it's not good to have cinnamon in conjunction with a surgery.

Then add a large chopped onion, sliced peppers (any kind will do, but the spicier, the better pain killing effects you'll get. I used about 8 Italian peppers from the market and about 6 Serranos out of my garden). You can also add a head of garlic (about 6 garlic cloves, chopped) and I would have, but garlic isn't good to take in conjunction with surgery, because it can cause excessive bleeding and bruising.

Let that cook till the veggies are almost your desired consistency, then add an eggplant cut into bite size cubes. (again, you can remove the skin or not. I did, because I am not the only one eating this soup and Jamey doesn't really like eggplant skin.)

Cook that till the eggplant is soft, but not falling apart. Then turn off the heat and add about 1/4 cup of honey (maybe more, depending on how sweet you like it) about a handful of chopped fresh basil and about a handful of chopped fresh oregano. Then add a half can of coconut milk (or a whole can... I just happened to have a half a can in the fridge already.)

This made about a half of a dutch oven of soup... a lot!

Eat & feel better.

I picked up my scripts a few days ago. I don't do pharmaceuticals if at all possible, but this is one of those rare times that I will. I got an antibiotic, which my PS instructed me to begin taking the night before surgery. I got an anti-nausea suppository, that I am determined NOT to need. It sounds really dangerous. It knocks you out for hours, apparently. I will be taking a travel mug of ginger tea with me for post surgery. I am also taking my own crackers since I don't eat non-organic or GMO foods and who knows what they will have at the surgery center. And I was given hydrocodone. I REALLY don't want to take it, BUT I will if needed. I have an extremely high tolerance for pain and I heal freakishly quickly. I've got several natural pain remedies that have worked in the past and I have my pain killing soup. I'm hoping that will be enough. We shall see. I will post photos of all the natural remedies I have on hand for post-op pain, bruising, and bleeding.

I kicked my dogs and cats out of the bedroom and began cleaning today. Animals carry all kinds of icky bacteria. See this article: http://voices.yahoo.com/5-kinds-bacteria-cat-drag-into-home-1453953.html?cat=5 Not only that, but I just want a clean room for 3 weeks (the amount of time my doctor told me to keep them out of my room). I'm VERY excited about having clean sheets for more than 5 minutes, clean carpet, no cat litter on the floor in the bathroom, and it will be quite a novelty to not have animal hair floating in my bedside glass of water. :P

I washed towels, the clothing my husband & I will wear to sleep in tomorrow night and the ones we will wear the few days post surgery, bedding, pillow cases, hand towels, curtains, a body pillow and pillow case for it, and a blanket to take in the car.

I vacuumed the carpet, bathroom tile, and mattress with the Rainbow vac (which removes like 90% of pet dander & dust). Then I ran the Rainbow with no attachments (which cleans the air) while I dusted.

Next, I'll clean and sanitize the master bathroom and then go finish cleaning the kitchen.

It's been nice to have something to keep me occupied today, so I don't just sit around being obsessed and looking at boobie pictures online. ;)

OMGODDESS!!!! I AM SO READY FOR THIS!

Don't forget to ask your surgeon if they are running any specials. I had already chosen my surgeon, about a year ago (not based on price). When I called to schedule the surgery a couple of months ago, I asked if they had any specials and they said "As a matter of fact, we do! We are running an end of summer special: $1600 off silicone implants."

SCORE!!!!!!!!!!!!

My PS told me to do these before surgery and immediately after surgery, up till day 3 when they will show me the other massages I'm supposed to do. The purpose of these are to help get your pectoral muscles ready for the shock of surgery and after it will help release them so the implants can begin to drop.

First, hold your arm up as in the first photo, and grab the peck muscle... digging your fingers down under the muscle and squeezing. Drop your arm, as in the second photo, and continue to work your fingers around under the muscle while squeezing the muscle. Just move it all around, loosening it up.

I've been doing these four about 3 days. The first time I did it, it hurt pretty badly, but they've really loosened up over the three days and now it's no big deal. I can move the muscle all around, lift it up, etc. without it hurting.

I took a couple of pre-op photos while I was taking the ones for the massage.

I just can't believe that this time tomorrow I'll be getting in the car to go get boobs! It's a little surreal, quite honestly. I really can't even believe it's almost here. This will, no doubt, be the longest day of my life! I'm glad I left the master bathroom cleaning for today, otherwise I'd have nothing whatsoever to do.

I'm praying for nice weather for the next three weeks, because last night I realized what a pain in the butt it was going to be if there was any inclement weather. There was lightning last night and we have an older dog, Fluke, who freaks out during storms. She scratched at the door incessantly last night. uhhhhgggg... that's going to suck! Everyone pray for nice weather in the Texas Hill Country for at least the next few nights. Thanks, ladies!

It's not even 6am the day before surgery and I am already freaking out about my size choice. I keep telling myself that I should trust my instincts, but...

So I have been looking, AGAIN, at before and after photos, attempting to find ones that are my same stats and the same shape and amount of breast tissue in their before photos as I have now. That's not an easy task. It's amazing how many different body types and sizes there are out there. I think I have just about talked myself off the ledge... maybe. Sigh... I'll just be SO glad when this is over! Who would have ever thought this would cause so much stress?

I was starting to get nauseous I was so nervous about the size earlier. I'm not at all nervous about surgery or pain. I was just freaking out that I might have spent $55k to not very what I really want.

I decided I needed to get out if the house or I was going to drive myself insane. So I drove to Natural Grocers ( about a 30 minute drive) and bought some honey fir tea and cat food, because we were almost out. I also got a Jamaican Ginger Ale and some Annie's organic ginger bunnies for post surgery.

When I got back out to the ranch, I had only blown an hour and it wasn't even noon, sigh...

So... I drove the other direction, to a different town, and sat in the parking lot at Bealls till they opened and then went in, grabbed a very large C/D looking bra and several outfits, went in the dressing room, stuffed the bra and tried on the clothes. I did NOT like the way it looked.

So, here I am sitting in bed with DH, watching TV, feeling very confident in the size of implant I chose. Whew!

:D 8 hours till bed time!

Thanks!

Me: Omg! This is the longest day EVER... and it's only half over.

Husband: Well, then I'm sure glad I'm spending it with you.

Me: Thanks, baby. I really needed that. Doesn't make it go any faster, but it makes me far less annoyed.

We are headed home. Surgical team said I was the best patient ever. :D

I'll update more details later, but I just wanted to let all you wonderful, supportive women that all is well. so far just feels like someone's been punching me in the boobs.

They all said they turned out perfect.

Alrighty, I'm home, tucked in bed, watching Resident Evil ( needed a no-brainer on in case I fall asleep).

I'm not really in any pain. Everything is just tight. I took my Arnica pills and Traumeel on the way home.

I wasn't the least bit nauseous when they woke me up and am still not. I ate some ginger cookies and drank ginger tea on the hour drive home, just in case.

DH got me a glass of prune juice after he tucked me into bed, to head of the constipation before it begins.

I haven't taken my antibiotic yet, because I don't want to take it on an empty stomach and I'm not the least bit hungry.

My only complaints are that I'm dizzy when not lying down, I'm having a hard time concentrating, and my arms are tingly and weird feeling.

I'll give you more details about the procedure when I can keep my thoughts straight. lol.

Thank you ALL so much for your stories, photos, and support. It's been a tremendous help.

That should say "home sweet home."

I've been home about an hour. Still only minimal discomfort, but my pectoral muscles are starting to get pretty tight. The massages I demonstrated above REALLY help relieve the pressure, of only temporarily. It also seems to help a lot to lie with an extra pillow lengthwise behind my back, so I can stretch my shoulders back a bit, rather than hunching over my chest. See photo.

I've not taken any pain meds at all and the fuzziness of the anesthesia is gone.

They were adamant about me getting up to walk around the house frequently, so I got up just now to walk to the kitchen, made myself some chamomile vanilla tea with honey ( honey is an antibacterial, antimicrobial, antibiotic) and my soup (see recipe in a previous post) so I could take my antibiotic.

All I want to do is touch them and look at them. I'm so pleased!

Don't be alarmed of your new boobies gurgle and squeak, ladies. It's completely normal and quite hilarious. It goes away.

Mine are already dropping. EXCELLENT! I have had no problem with movement. I can stretch my arms ( pretty much full range of movement), lift them up to my head, no problem, no pain and still no pain meds. HALLELUJAH! :D

First of all, let me just say that having a carbonated Hawaiian ginger ale was a HUGE mistake! Stay away from carbonated drinks post op!!! I already had to much excess gas/air in my body from surgery. I certainly shouldn't have added to it. It was causing ask kinds of discomfort by yesterday evening.

I started to get that bowling ball on my chest feeling around bed time and while I wouldn't have considered it painful, it was definitely uncomfortable. I decided I really needed to sleep and that my best bet was going to be to take a Hydrocodone. Within about 30 minutes, I want feeling much of anything. I slept til it wore off and then took another at about 2am. I also got up and went poop, which also allowed me to release some of the gas buildup. YAY! Then, before going back to sleep, I took some oral Arnica, as I've got a pretty good amount of bruising up my sternum and below both breasts, extending to under my arms. Then I slept for about 4 more hours.

I got up and mass some tea. I emptied the dishwasher, so I could get the dirty dishes off the counter. And I just took one more Hydrocodone ( going to try not to take any during the day), some bromeline, my Arnica, and some Traumeel and I'm going to try to sleep a little more before I have to leave for the hour drive to my first post op appt.

I still have pretty great range of motion and no real pain, just very tight and uncomfortable up top. The bloating is gone, so I'm able to engage my core muscles, thank goodness! I hate walking be the mirror and looking pregnant.

I've got a running list of things that worked and didn't work for me yesterday. I will post that and a post op appt update with photos when I return to the ranch this afternoon.

Really looking forward to my appointment, so I can hear what PS has to say about my results.

That was pretty much uneventful. My post-op assistant was great. I asked her about icing, because PS had said no icing. She told me, in a whisper, "I didn't say this, but yes you can, for short periods, but don't get the ice near the nipples or incisions, only between the breasts, up high, where the peck muscles are tight and on the sides, under my arms, where there's a lot of swelling and bruising.

She also have me a script for Flexoril, a non-addictive muscle relaxer to take at bedtime instead of the Hydrocodone, because I don't like taking Acetamenophin products. They are really hard on your liver. She totally understood and agreed.

Coincidentally, She just had her boobs done on Friday. (think she got them done for free?) She showed me her abdomen . It was very swollen with fluid that had migrated from the swelling on the sides of her boobs. She told me that I have the same swelling on the sides and have me a heads up about the fluid migration. Good to know!

My PS said my breasts look great, just like they are supposed to right now. I asked him about the bruising on my sternum and under my breasts. He said it was totally normal and commented that I don't have much swelling. So that's good.

They gave me my warranty card. Lol! My boobies are under warranty. She told me to keep it forever.

They were impressed and pleased with my lack of pain and my full range of motion. They both said it was certainly because I am in such good shape and good health. Makes me VERY glad that I got my gym membership when I scheduled my surgery a few months ago. WELL worth the cost of the membership!

My post-op asst promised me that the pressure in my peck muscles would subside in the next few days. hallelujah.

I'm scheduled for my second follow up appt next Tuesday.

So when I woke up in the middle of the night last night, my breasts looked almost perfect. I have no idea how, because when I woke up this morning, they looked like this. LOL! I'm so glad I can find humor in this. Just know, this is COMPLETELY normal. So don't freak when it happens to you.

This bruising is also normal, though not everyone bruises. I bruise easily, so I am not surprised. My bruises typically go away pretty quickly too, so hopefully that will be the case with this also.

from Target

Flexoril is a non-habit forming muscle relaxer. They doctor said it would knock me out. Apparently it works like many anti-depressants, by altering neural pathways so your muscles relax. well I took it around 6pm and was going to call it an early night. It knocked me on my ass, fir sure, but then I woke up a little before 8pm and am not at all tired anymore. It definitely helped release my pectorals. I'll give it that. They are still much more relaxed than they were. Just don't expect it to keep you sleep all night and DEFINITELY don't take it if you are going to do anything other than tuck yourself into bed immediately, because it will mess you up, gradually, in about 45 min from taking it.

I slept SO well when I went back to sleep after I posted that Flexoril review last night.WOW! I seriously don't think I moved a muscle. When I woke up EVERYTHING was stiff, but not in a painful way, really. and my pec (is it pec or peck?) muscles are much more relaxed, that's for sure. That was far better than that liver damaging hydrocodone. Yay!

Healthy, fresh, locally grown and raised foods are the best medicine. Your body NEEDS the nutrients in then in order to heal. I felt so great after that Flexeril last night, I got up this morning and made breakfast.

Yep, just as my post-op asst warned, the fluid swelling that was on the sides of my boobs has migrated down to my waist. It's very uncomfortable, but not painful at all. I posted a photo for you. Just wanted to make sure that if it happens to you, it's totally normal. Don't panic.

I have been drinking prune juice at every meal from the moment I got out of surgery and have had no constipation, however everything I eat, no matter what it is or the quantity, makes me bloated and gassy. This is also very normal for any kind of surgery, because surgery puts your digestive system into shock. So I've started taking Beano with every meal. So far it has helped a bunch. If you've never heard of it, it is an enzyme pill that helps your body digest food properly.

My right side is worse. The PS told me that if this happens to just gently massage the puffy areas and eventually the fluid would work its way out of my system.

They actually looked sort of normal when I woke up this morning. But I decided to take a shower (first one since surgery) and as soon as I took all the compression off, they swelled back up. Man oh man, I will be dileriously happy when that stops happening!

It's the end of day 3 (2nd day after surgery). They've really started to fill out underneath. Also, when I just made dinner, my pecs didn't go crazy and tighten up near as much as this morning. I sure hope this continues tomorrow.

I went for a walk today and that really helped with the fluid retention in my abdomen and sides.

Just took a Flexeril and am going to sleep.

Night, peeps! :)

I went to sleep around 6:30 last night, not necessarily because I was tired. I was just being impatient for these girls to drop and wanted to take my Flexeril to help them along. So, I woke up around 1am, feeling very well rested and relaxed, albeit bored out of my mind. So, I played dress up for a bit. I put off several outfits to show my hubby. He FINALLY looks pleased with my decision to get implants. ;) He even reached over when I got back in bed and grabbed a boob ( which was fine, because they don't hurt at all). Ha! I knew he would like them!

On a side note, I'm starting to get itchy... all over, not just my boobs. What have you ladies done to combat that?

They are starting to soften up a bit. Still a little boxy, especially on the left, but looking good. :D

I still have some swelling in my sides and abdomen, but the walking yesterday helped lots.

I'm becoming stir crazy. I'd kill to go for a run. It's going to be a very long 6 weeks. I also miss hot epsom salt baths. They are one of my favorite pastimes... sitting in the dark, in the bath, listening to my audio book. Sigh...

Someone is seriously missing the boat by not making and selling printed and fashionably colored bandeaus and compression bras. I've looked ALL over the internet and the best I can find is black post op bras. Bandeaus apparently come in nothing but white. Someone PLEASE prove me wrong. :/

If I have to wear this ugly bandeau 24/7 then I had to figure out a way to hide it. A scarf does the trick. Yay!

I can't even tell you how deliriously happy I am right now. Epsom salt baths are a staple for me. I couldn't imagine going more than a few days without one, especially with all these chemicals and excess fluids in my system. Epsom salt is such a great detox. My husband drive me to the nearest town so I could buy some 100% waterproof bandages to cover my incisions. Bless that man! So I've got my detox tea, some dried mango, and my Outlander series on audio and I'm lounging in the tub. Yep, heaven, indeed.

As far as how I'm doing on day 3 (or is it 4 since I got surgery so early in the morning?)...

Other than extreme boredom and stir craziness, I feel fantastic. Boobies are a lot softer than yesterday and still not painful at all. I get occasional twinges around my incision sites from the nerves coming back to life, but they are pretty mild so far.

I have full range of motion in my arms, without any tightness anymore. I can even clasp my hands behind my back and do a swimmers pec stretch.

I took a short walk this morning and my pecs still tensed up, but nit add bad as yesterday. They still tense up very uncomfortably, drawing the implants up to what feels like my collar bones, when I remove the bandeau. So I decided to wear it in the bath, wash it by hand in there, and then pop it in the dryer and just suffer while it dries. It's looking pretty gross from all the Arnica gel that rubs off on it.

I couldn't find the photo I have my surgeon, but this is pretty close.

I'm really sick of sleeping sitting up.

* Work out as much as you can before surgery, avoiding working out your pectoral muscles. Specifically, work you core. You're really going to need it when you can't use your arms to move yourself around in bed. And stretch, stretch, stretch. You can't stretch too much.

* Have lots of fruit, fresh and dried, to snack on after surgery. Your body will need the natural sugars to make red blood cells.

* Be prepared to be manhandled by your surgeon before AND after surgery. It's going to really hurt when he/she grabs your boob and squeezes the day after surgery, so they can be sure everything is nice and tight in there.

* Food causes bloating and gas after surgery... and LOTS of it. Surgery and general anesthesia put your digestive system into shock. I suggest taking Beano at every meal. You're going to be uncomfortable enough without adding gas to the mix. P.S. If you get pain in your back... between your shoulder blades, you may think it is from your new sleeping position, but it could also be gas.

* Many of the meds and the trauma to your digestive system are going to cause constipation. Trust me, being backed up will not help your comfort level at all. Start drinking prune juice as soon as you can stomach it and continue to drink it with every meal until you feel that your digestion is back on track.

* Eat healthy, fresh, whole foods before and after surgery. Your body needs the nutrients to heal properly.

*Whatever you do, don't drink anything carbonated, not 7-up, not Sprite, and not ginger ale. You will regret it almost immediately. Your body is already full of air and gas from them opening up your chest. If you add more, it's going to be very uncomfortable for you. Drink water or ginger tea, but nothing carbonated till your digestive system is back on track (at least a week).

* Surgery, Anesthesia, Meds, Trauma to your tissue... they all release toxins into your system, toxins that contribute to how quickly and efficiently you heal. I suggest doing a 10 day detox before surgery (you can get the kits at any health food store and lots of regular grocery stores carry them as well.) I did mine so that I finished the last day of detox 2 days before surgery. Then after surgery, drink detox tea, drink LOADS of water, and sit in Epsom salt baths. (just make sure the water is low enough that you don't get any water on your incisions, so you don't risk infection.)

* The compression strap/bandeau and compression bra that you get post surgery will very likely be extremely uncomfortable. As if you need to add any more discomfort to the fact that you were cut open and had implants shoved into your body, then sewn back up! It's very likely to rub your armpits raw. If you take a pair of soft socks, you can use them to add some extra padding under your arms. Just shove one down inside the bra under both armpits and fold the excess over the top, over the compression garment. (I used brand new ones out of the package, as to not risk any bacteria that didn't die in the wash.)

* You might or might not bruise. I had horrible bruising and swelling, specifically straight up my sternum. Take oral Arnica, rub Arnica oil, gel or cream directly on the bruising, and take Pineapple Bromeline (and eat fresh pineapple). I am on day 4 and my bruising is practically gone already.

* If you don't have drain tubes, and possibly even if you do, you you're going to have some fluid build up. Don't freak out when that fluid travels down to your midsection and makes you feel extremely fat. It WILL go away. It isn't fat. Be patient.

* Antibiotics kill all the bacteria in your body, even the good bacteria. You NEED to replace it. Take probiotics, eat Greek yogurt and fermented foods, and drink probiotic drinks. When you don't get a yeast infection and your digestive system gets back on track quickly, you'll be SO glad you did.

* WALK AROUND! I know you might not feel like it and you may not make it far and even that short distance you may need help from your caregiver, but DO IT! Seriously. You will feel so much better so much more quickly if you get up and move around. Move your arms (slowly), stretch your body as best you can. Every time you get up and do these things it will get easier and you will feel better.

* BREATHE DEEPLY! This is SO important and I can't express that enough. It's going to feel very difficult to breathe because your pectorals will be in shock and contracting so hard that it feels like there is an elephant doing a slow waltz on your chest, but you NEED to breathe deeply, otherwise you are putting yourself at risk of pneumonia.

* Don't hunch over your chest, if you can help it. Try to stretch your shoulders back a bit when you are lying around bored out of your mind. Everything will soften up much more quickly of you do this, hopefully making your dropping and fluffing process go a bit more quickly and smoothly.

* Above all else, follow your doctor's orders. There's a reason they are the doctor and you are not. I would not normally say that doctors know more about my body than me, but I know for a fact they know more about implants and the implant process than I do. If your doctor says to get up and move around, DO IT! If your doctor says no smoking DON'T SMOKE. If your doctor says not to lift anything over 10lbs for 6 weeks, for crying out loud, DON'T! Listen to them. That's why your paying them thousands of dollars, for their expertise.

* Don't freak out when your breasts look nothing like you envisioned. I can tell you right now, they definitely, without a doubt WILL NOT look the way you want them to right after surgery. In fact, it could take months. I know it's hard to be patient, but you've waited this long, what's another few weeks or months? If you have done your research and you trust the surgeon you chose (which you better make sure you do, because that's an awful lot of time, money, and health risk to offer up without having confidence in your plastic surgeon.) then you can relax and know that your breasts will get there. There will come a day, in the not to distant future, when you will look in the mirror and be completely overjoyed by what you see.

Ok, ladies, these implants trying to fill up the pocket my surgeon made for them feels JUST like my milk letting down when I was breast feeding. Crazy! But the good news is, they are definitely trying to find their permanent position. Let's just hope it doesn't take weeks, because I'm nit sure I could stand them feeling like this for that long.

Nerve endings are reconnecting all over the place. I feel like someone is using my new boobies for pin cushions. This is the first time I've taken any pain meds during the day... just hoping to dull the pin pricks a little.

My good news for the day... no scratch that... my incredible news for the day is: Netflix is working for the first time since I got out of surgery. Thank goodness for bad movie distractions!

I've always been a human barometer. Every time the barometric pressure changes, I get the hiccups. So it started getting stormy last night in the Texas Hill Country. (Thank you, Mother Nature, we REALLY need the rain.) We are under flash flood warning until later tonight. And I swear my boobies know it. They have been twice as achy this morning. It really sucks, I'm not gonna lie.

I can definitely see why many women who have breast augmentation, after several days of this endless pressure on their chest, get a bit emotional or depressed and start to seriously question their sanity when they were making the decision to get implants.

I just keep repeating my mantra "This is exactly what you expected for the first few months. Have patience. This too shall pass and you'll be one of those women who are posting about how normal they feel again and how perfect their boobs are and how happy they are that they made this decision." And so far, I'm just highly annoyed and impatient, rather than depressed and sad. There's a light at the end of the tunnel. I can't actually see it, lol, but I know it's there. ;)

I'm sick of taking all these pills and I'm sick of lying down all the time and I'm sick of not being able to run or go to the gym and I'm sick of not being able to jump in the car and drive to Austin when I get bored and I'm sick of not being able to snuggle with my husband and I'm sick of refraining from sex and I'm sick of not being able to have a proper bath and a glass of wine and most of all, I'm sick of liking in the mirror and not seeing my perfect boobs YET. ok... thanks for letting me get that off my chest. Just needed to vent. I'm done now.

Ok, as far as progress:

I can squeeze the top of my boobs and see the implant pop down into the pocket and they look damn near perfect, but the second I let go they pop right back up where they were. Stubborn implants!

I feel like there are bugs crawling all over me. I don't know which one, but one of these meds are making my skin very dry.

My nipples are extremely sensitive.

The fluid in my midsection didn't go away, I realized. it was just hiding in my back.

The antibiotics have completely cleared up my facial acne. That's the one thing I've always loved about taking them... the only thing really.

I can move and stretch at almost 100%. I think I'll do a bit of core work on my big exercise ball today, perhaps I can work some of this fluid out. And I'm in an Epsom salt bath right now, hoping that will help.

I'm not hungry AT ALL, which on the one hand makes me a little happy because I really was worried about all the weight I was going to gain not being able to run, but in the other hand I can't take my antibiotic without food or I'll get nauseous and my body needs nutrients to heal properly. Such a conundrum.

My right breast is looking pretty great, right after I push the implant down, but my left is a bit square on the sides still. so I have been massaging it more than the right. It looks far better than a few days ago, that's for sure!

My kids have been on Fall Break since the week before my surgery and they took a trip to New Mexico with my parents. They will be home today. I'm wondering what they will say the first time they see them. They were pretty upset that they wouldn't be here on my surgery day and have been anxious to get home and appraise my new boobies. (we are great boobie fans in this household)

I have jury duty tomorrow. before the surgery I was excited to go and do my civil duty and was thrilled about getting to see our justice system in action. Now... now I'm praying I'm not chosen. Feel free to pray with me, if you're so inclined. Thanks!

I put my post op bra in the wash. It was getting pretty gross.

There was only one bra other than the post op one that my PS would approve and it's the front zip Under Armour sport bra. I just bought a 34D at Academy. My girls are in heaven right now!!!!! Thank you, Under Armour!

A word of advice... if you are currently the only one in your household who cleans, don't fool yourself into believing that will miraculously change just because you had surgery. Do yourself a favor and hire a maid for the first week or two or eight after your surgery. :/

I was not chosen for jury duty!!! I'm sui relieved, because just the selection process was torture. Not only were my boobs aching and I just had to sit and suffer rather than massaging my pecs, but it was about 60° with the vent blowing full blast right on me. Horrible!

I was in such a foul mood yesterday afternoon. The beginning of the day was pretty great. I got dressed up and my husband took me to Academy to get the awesome comfy sports bra. Then we had a sushi date. Then we went to Natural Grocers for groceries. While on the drive home I ended up having to deal with teen drama (kids weren't even actually hike yet and I was already dealing with it, uhhg) and then I got home, took a muscle relaxer and asked my husband to put the groceries away. A few minutes later he came and got in bed and feel asleep. I got up to make some tea and OMG the kitchen was atrocious. He had left a huge mess from making me breakfast that morning. He had left all the dishes from the last two days all over the counters. He had tracked mud all over the floor. And he did NOT put the groceries away. I was fuming. Took every ounce of self control I had to not pick a fight with him. It could never have been a fair fight with me on meds.

I'm feeling much better today. Just be aware that any issues you already have with your loved ones will feel magnified by 50 when you're post op, in pain or discomfort, and on meds.

EVERY man I passed in line at jury duty was staring at my cleavage. That was a VERY new experience for me. I was actually a bit uncomfortable. I kept having to tell myself that my cleavage is just over accentuated because my implants are so high still. I mean, I don't have a problem with guys looking, it was just weird... especially in a courthouse.

I had my 8 day post op appointment today. Everything looks good. They changed my steri strips (thankfully, because they were gross) and they said my incisions look good. I beg to differ, they look pretty gross to me, but they assured me that from a medical point of view they look exactly like they are supposed to at 8 days.

My PS noticed that my left boob is higher and still boxy. He told me to massage it more (although I swear all I do is massage my boobs all day and night and pray for them to drop, but ok) and they showed me a specific massage for the part under my left arm that was still very squared looking, to open up the pocket over there.

They OKed my awesome sports bra, after they inspected to make sure it wasn't putting any undesirable pressure anywhere.

They also showed me where to put my compression band and how tight and told me to adjust it throughout the day when I'm more or less swollen. They said that the to of the implant shouls be halfway up the band. That was very helpful info, because the implants are all over the place throughout the day. See the photo I added for more classification on this.

They also showed me that I could fold the band in half under my arm pit for more comfort. See photo for this as well.

I asked about the fluid retention all over my body. They said it could take up to 6 months to go away!!! THAT would have been nice to know before surgery. I would still have the surgery, but at least I would have been prepared to feel fat for months.

I have an appointment Monday to get my stitches out.

How I'm doing:

I still feel great, though I'm disappointed about the jiggly icky feeling in my belly, back, hips, thighs, and arms that will apparently be around for a while. :( I bought some herbal tea that is supposed help with mild edema. Fingers crossed.

I have been having the weirdest dreams while I'm taking this Flexeril and Hydrocodone.

And I don't know if I'm just paranoid (I fully accept this possibility), but while I was out and about today it felt like everyone I passed was looking at my boobs. I know for a fact my bank teller was starting at them. As often as I am in there in skimpy tank tops and such, it's no secret I have no boobs... correction: HAD no boobs. So that was a little awkward.

I went to Old Navy today while I was out and their awesome soft muscle shirts are on sale for $5. I bought 4 and 2 summer striped ones on clearance for $2.99 each.

Teas for post op

Today was my first day back at my normal routine. I left the house for the 1 hour drive to go get kids from school. I left an hour early so I wouldn't have to rush and was going to treat myself to lunch out when I got to that side of town early. I chose one of my favorite restaurants, took off my compression strap, went to grab my purse.... it wasn't there. I left it all the way back at the ranch. So I had to drive all the way back out to BFE. By the time I got there, I was so stressed and uncomfortable that my husband had to drive me back in to town to get the kids. I was so happy to be back in bed when we got home. My body is a great gauge of when I've done too much. My husband is going to take kids to school in the morning. I'm very happy to not have to get up at 6am and drive 2 hours.

Speaking of doing too much. I emailed my post op assistant today and asked her if there was any exercise I could get, even squats or lunges, without getting my heart rate up. She said that the doctor says if my body is going to spend energy repairing, it needs to be repairing breast tissue not muscle. Do that's it... the definitive word. It's going to be a VERY long 5 weeks. :(

The good news is, my breasts are definitely dropping... very slowly, but surely. when I stand with no bra and no strap, they actually hang down a bit and cover the incisions. :D Yayness!!!

When I am lying in bed, first thing in the morning, my breasts are damn near perfect. However, the instant my feet hit the ground my implants start crawling back up under my pecs like a couple of terrified kittens. I guess they are just not ready to face the world yet. Sigh...

My breasts are getting jiggly! More so on the right than left, but the left is getting there. The "massages," they have me to open the pocket on the left to get rid of the flattened part ate working, if you can even call them that. It's more like pinch the crap out of the side of my boob and try not to scream. Nevermind the bruising from the surgery, now I'm bruised again from this method of torture. I think my PS and his staff are sadists. BUT, it works. I'll give them that.

My husband took kids to school yesterday and after he dropped them off, he took the car to be aligned and have the oil changed for me. So when I drove in yesterday, at least I didn't have to wrestle the steering wheel the whole 2 hour drive.

He also drove kids to school today. This time he was much more disgruntled about having to to it, but at least he didn't say anything, just huffed and puffed when getting out of bed. 4 hours in the car is still too much for me. 2, I can handle.

So, I'm just chillin' in bed with my weightless tea, dried mango, and an independent film... thinking seriously about letting my favorite dog in to snuggle since I need to change the sheets anyway. He seems very sad lately. He's been displaced for almost 2 weeks now. Poor baby. I don't think I'm in any danger of getting infected. There's no way my incisions took more than a week to close up.

Looks like I'm going to be a C cup after all. Yay!

My husband seems to get entirely too much joy out of the pain it causes when he does my pec "massage." hmmmm... payback is a bitch, mister! ;)

Not much to report today. I did figure out, amidst drama created by my 19 yr old daughter, that when I get frustrated and upset, my boobs become much more uncomfortable. Must be my blood pressure rising. Hot epsom salt bath, my cure-all, helped a bunch.

Oh, and on a side note, I've been using the comfrey calendula ointment on my boobs to prevent stretch marks and to help with the itching. My boobs are freakishly soft!

Tell me I'm not the only one who can't keep her hands off her breasts. ;)

The steri strips are coming off. Got my first peek at the incisions. I mean, I saw them a week ago, but only briefly. They look SO much better now! Stitches are coming out tomorrow. I'm psyched!

Also, the swelling has gone way down and I can definitely see why people get boob envy. I've got to remember patience... they will look NOTHING like this in a few weeks. Dropping and fluffing can't come fast enough! Sigh...

I got my stitches out today. They said my incisions look great and are heading so well that I'll hardly be able to see them when it's all said and done. I could have told them that. lol! I heal VERY well.

They said myI implants are dropping rally nicely and they are going to be perfect. Whew! That's so nice to hear.

They showed me my new massages and told me to get really aggressive with them. They said there's no worry of incisions opening, but if it felt weird while massaging, I could put counter pressure underneath while pushing the implants down from above.

They have me the OK to go get a soft underwire bra and suggested Victoria's Secret. Well, I figured out the secret... they are extremely unhelpful at that site and their bras are very uncomfortable. SO, I went to Macy's and bought three Bali bras that are extremely comfortable.

I still have to wear the strap 24/7. BLEHHHHHHHHHHHH! I asked if I could at least get a new one, because this one is getting gross. They couldn't get into the surgery center to get me one, but I am going to run by there on Wednesday for a new one.

I only have 4 Flexeril left and forgot to ask for a refill, so I emailed them tonight to ask. Fingers crossed!

And yes, I had to report and block a creeper user on here today. DO NOT, under any circumstances, text anyone who messages you on here asking you to text them photos. Report them and block them. STAY SAFE!

Every night, for the last several nights, I wake up around 3am, feeling like the lower pole of my breasts is about to explode. It's not comfortable at all, but clearly the implants are trying very hard to take up that space. Woke up this morning and there is a visible difference in how far they hang down. You can barely see the incisions and steri strips, even with my arms up. SO exciting!

I took the steri strips off my incisions so I could start my scar prevention routine. about 2 weeks before my surgery I basically fileted one of my toes. It was literally sliced all the way through long ways along the bone. I got 5 stitches. I took them out myself a week later, because it was pretty much healed. and now 4 weeks later, you can hardly even see where it was sliced.

My routine, which has worked well fir me on many occasions, is to alternate Arnica oil and Calendula Comfrey ointment throughout the day until the damage is healed and I'm sure there won't be a scar.

The photos I am including in this post are day one for the BA incisions and before and after of my toe.

I was given the OK to sleep lying down and got 6 straight hours of sleep last night. I feel amazing this morning!

In other news:

I've got Mondor's Cords at both incisions. It's a temporary condition and it resolves itself over time. Heating pad and Ibuprofin help. They aren't painful, just weird feeling when I stretch my arms way above my head. I'll post RS response from surgeons about them.

Boobies are dropping very nicely and they crawl up my chest less and les every day. I'll post pics later.

Sounds like something from LOTR. LOL! http://www.realself.com/question/mondors-cords1

18 days

They are dropping more and more every day and every morning they stay put for longer when I remove the compression strap... but they still climb up, especially when my heart rate gets up above resting heart rate.

It took a whole 10 minutes without the compression strap this morning before the implants started creeping back up my chest and even then they didn't go far. Hallelujah!

Went to Frederick's today. Their D is to small for me!

Took the new boobs out for a spin for Halloween. Could have never been a pinup before. :D

Tomorrow will be exactly 4 weeks.

pretty sure you won't be able to differentiate the scars from the crease under my boobs at all. yay!

Tonight I get to sleep on my side!!!!! HALLELUJAH!

I had my one month appointment today. PS said they look good, but are not where they are supposed to be yet... duh. ;)

He took measurements and drew all over me again, took photos and said that if, by some crazy chance, they don't drop to where my nipples are high enough up by 6 months, then he can move my nipples up, without doing a full anchor lift, just by cutting around the nipples and moving them up slightly... a finger's breadth. Hopefully that won't be necessary.

Other than that, everything looks perfect. So I made an appointment for 2 weeks from now and while I'm there for post op, I'm going to have a consult for non-surgical options for the skin that is sagging and wrinkling under my chin and around my mouth.

I have to wear the strap for another 1.5 weeks, then can throw it away. Ans I can also work out then. I can't wait!

Nipples are still lower than they should be, but it's still early in my opinion. Righty is still higher than lefty.

I'm tired of waiting for these puppies to drop and for my nipples to be in an aesthetic position! So I came up with a temporary solution. :D

So my hubby finally admitted he loves my boobs. heh heh... I knew he would. Why is it so damn difficult for them to admit that? Do they think we will think they are superficial? I mean, come on guys... who doesn't like big, squishy boobies? You can say "more than a handful is a waste," but you know that instinctually you all love them. It's innate in all of us. ;)

I decided to give Victoria's Secret another go... at a different location. They were only slightly more helpful than the other location. I did figure out that, as of now, I am a 34DD. I ended up going to Target instead and bought 3 super comfy lace cami bras for $15 each.

In other news... 2 more days!!! ( till I can work out)

Went for my first power walk/jog this morning. It was weird. My right boob, the one that has dropped more, seemed fine. My left one, that is still high, got twinges and felt like it was creeping back up. I was a tiny bit sore on both sides afterward.

I also ditched the compression strap last night. It was a bit uncomfortable sleeping without it. Didn't expect THAT!

Appointment went well. I talked to them about doing some facial stuff while I was there. Turns out that the company that makes my implants offers free botox for anyone who gets silicone implants, just so ya know. You might want to check, if you're interested.

Working out is a little weird, but it's great to get moving again. PS talked more about a lift, but I'm pleased with them the way they are and am going to pass. :)