Goodbye Fat Apron! -Wichita, KS

I am 5'4, 180 lbs. I am an apple shape, so I carry most of my weight in the middle. I have been over weight since my c section 13 years ago. I have been exercising 4 days a week, eating limited carbs, and stopped drinking pop over the last 3 years. No matter what I do, my legs get smaller, my arms get smaller, and my darn belly and boobs, just won't budge! It is sooooo frustrating! Because of my shape, people always ask when I am due! My turning point was 2 years ago. My daughter (who is an only child), was asked by her Dr. if she was getting a baby brother or a baby sister. She was so confused and looked a little happy, as if I was keeping a secret from her! I politely told the Dr. that I wasn't pregnant! She looked at me, embarassed and said, "Oh I was thinking of another patient!", as she was eyeing my tummy! I was mortified, and cried that night at home. I also had to tell my child, I wasn't having a baby!!!

So since then, I have started to look into tummy tucks. I researched all the doctors in my area, and chose 2 for consultations. I chose Dr. Rieger, because he had an excellent personality, and didn't make me feel uncomfortable. He also had great reviews on many different sites I googled.
My only fears are.....1. I am on the high end of the weight scale, and am terrifed of complications due to that. My PS said that my BMI is 30, which is the cut off for a TT. I feel like I barely made it! #2. He doesn't have his patients wear a compression garment. He said that it causes lumps in the skin and adds more pain for the patient than is necessary. Practically everyone on here has to wear one, so I am scared I will get a clot or lots of crazy swelling that could have been prevented. #3. I work in a busy hospital, pushing beds, carts, wheelchairs, heavy xray equiptment etc. I was only allowed to take 5 weeks off. I was told I had to come back at 100%, or not at all! That terrifies me, as I have been here 9 years! #4 The amount of time that I will be under freaks me out. I work in the operating room, and probably know a little too much for my own good! #5 I take Lexapro, and have read that people die taking pain meds with Lexapro or Celexa, that is prescribed by their doctors. #6 I read too much on here and the internet, and only the bad things seem to be running through my head!!! My surgery is scheduled for April 19, and I am already having nightmares and anxiety about dying on the table or of a blood clot, leaving behind my little girl for vanity!
On the other side of the spectrum, I am excited to be able to wear cute panties, and be able to tuck in my shirt and wear a cute belt. I have tried on so many cute shirts, only to have the look ruined by my pooch sticking out! I also go on vacations in the summer, and have to wear my mom swimsuit with the skirt, while hanging out with my friends in bikinis. Errrrrr! I wished I looked cute just wearing a 1 piece!!!! lol I know that having this done, will boost my confidence and make working out seem worth it! Right now, the more I work out, the hangier my fat apron gets!!! Not cute!
I look forward to chatting with people with the same fears etc. and who will be having their surgeries soon, like me. I am sooooo glad I found this site, as I feel like I am boring people with my countless TT talk! lol