Going to Rack City! - White Plains, NY

Since middle school, I've always known I wanted to get breast implants (even though I wasn't fully developed, haha!) My idea of the "perfect pair" are the kind you find in magazines that look somewhat fake but still natural, if that makes any sense. Anyways, I had my nose done first in 2011 which was my number one, and after many long, drawn out months of waiting (I'll explain why) I'm finally doing it! I'm currently at a 32A (I think I'm a large A, small B) and would like to go up to a small D. I've decided to go with 375ishcc (which I haven't told my surgeon yet, am doing that at my final appointment with him next week) saline, under the muscle. Every surgeon I've seen is very conservative, mine included, and doesn't seem to want to give me more than a 330. As much as I appreciate this, I also know the number one regret with a BA is not going big enough.

I'm hoping to go with high profile but may do MPP instead because I heard MPP gives you more "cleavage" while high profile just makes them project more, and I'm not looking for a set of torpedoes, LOL. I chose saline because I'm deathly afraid of complications from a silicone rupture. Just the idea of having a foreign object in my body makes me squeamish enough so the thought of having something that could potentially kill me is really scary. The only turn off is that I've heard a great deal of times silicone feels much more natural than saline. That and I'm a stomach sleeper so I feel like sleeping on these is going to be hard getting used to. I've been having trouble sleeping this past week and I think it's because I'm so nervous about this! Even though I think I know what to expect having been through surgery before, this feels so much more invasive because it's someone actually cutting into your torso. EEEK! I just keep reminding myself this is a super popular procedure done all the time, I'm really healthy and take great care of myself so there's nothing to worry about.

One thing I am concerned with however is recovery. After reading hundreds of reviews and talking to people who have had this, it seems like I should expect to be moving around after a couple days. I remember after my last surgery I was walking around doing normal things that very day! However I know this is much more invasive so I expect to be down for the count for at least 2 days. Like I said, I take great care of myself, lift weights/exercise 6-7 days a week etc. so I'm expecting that I'll be strong enough to not be sequestered to my bed for a week straight! A friend of the family told me that after her surgery she literally couldn't move for 2 weeks which really freaked me out! Then again she had this done 20 years ago so I don't know how different procedures are then vs. now. I just feel like not moving for 2 weeks is not going to happen but that's my biggest fear right now as well as the pain factor. I've followed advice from all the reviews and recommendations I've read and bought all my recovery meds like Arnica Montana, Bromelain, Scar Cream, diaper rash cream, etc. I have a huge list of more things to get this week to help with recovery like body cleansing wipes, a handled loofah, body pillow...ahh. I'm spending a lot on recovery alone but I know it will be worth it! I feel like I'm an unofficial expert in BA from reading SO much on it! I have to get my blood work done tomorrow and am going in for my final pre-op next week so I'll keep everyone posted!

Met with my surgeon today to "finalize" everything. I think it's safe to say I'm freaking out!! I've been obsessively looking at boobs for the past week and reading reviews and I'm seriously considering going with silicone now. The thought of having the saline water-sounds sloshing around and potentially hard boobs is a big turn off. I just want them to feel light and squishy, LOL. I have until Monday to make my final decision. I know it'll be $1,000 more but honestly to make this big of a change to my body in the first place and to put it through so much the extra money is worth it to me. A $1,000 difference could mean the difference in how I feel for the next oh, 15 years! But we'll see. I'm starting to get that boob greed everyone talks about! I'm 5'4", 112lbs (athletic-- I lift and work out a ton)! and am definitely getting high profile at least 350cc. My surgeon said he will try to fit a 375 if he can the day of which I'm hoping for. He said he COULD do a 400 but I would have to have surgery again in 5 years. Not trying to do that! I'm going to remind him to go as big as possible under 400 the day of surgery in case he forgets ;)

Also went and got most of my post-op stuff today (scripts and necessities like heating packs, tissues, body cleaning clothes etc.) I had a huge list so if anyone needs help in the boob supply area feel free to ask :) I'm going grocery shopping next week for heavier things I might need and also really stocking up on produce. I'm getting fresh fruit smoothies and am on the hunt for the green ones because I'm sure drinking my nutrients will be better than noshing on salad in bed! I also ordered a humungous body pillow off Amazon which should be in next week. I just have to get my sports bras and groceries and I'll be good to go, eek! I seriously think I'm driving my boyfriend nuts with this whole thing and have probably freaked him out too. I can't help it, it's all I can think about! I keep reading him reviews and talking about boobs nonstop. But hey, at least he knows what to expect when I come out of surgery. I made it very clear I'll probably have boobs up to my neck and will be super sore! Needless to say I think I've created another boob expert, haha! I feel surgery and boobs are the only thing on my mind and I'm having such a hard time concentrating on anything else! It's funny because I had my nose done 2 years ago and maybe it was because I wanted it SO badly and didn't know what to expect from surgery that I didn't prepare for it nearly as much as I am for this! Ahh. I'm going to spend the next couple of days looking at more boobs and make my silicone/saline decision this weekend!

My surgery is in 3 days!!!! I've been so so anxious for the past few days. I really just want to get it over and done with and start the recovery period! I guess the good part about all this is that I've read SO much on breast implants from recovery to FAQ's and all in between that I think I'm really well prepared for this. It gives me more of a peace of mind to have a good understanding of what to expect. Knowledge is power! ;) I thought long and hard over the weekend and have actually decided to go with the salines. As much as I love the idea of having probably more natural-feeling boobs, the whole silicone rupture thing freaks me out so much that I just don't think it would be worth it to be constantly wondering if my boobs are going to kill me. OK, I'm being really dramatic but I'm the type of person to freak myself out. Needless to say saline is the right choice for me. Despite the fact that I'm really anxious I also have a kind of calmness too. I think it's because I've prepared so much and read so many stories that I'm ready as I'll ever be. I even second guessed myself a couple times, if this is really what I want, and I do. So many people have told me I'm wasting my money, I'll regret it, it's not worth it etc. but I know myself better than anyone and I know this is something I need to do for myself. Being a plastic surgery "vet" I know the feeling when people doubt your decision but in the end I made the best decision ever and have 0 regrets, so I know I'll be OK with this too. I keep telling myself that this is the best time to do it- I have a flexible work from home job and classes (thanks, Internet! ;) ) and summer isn't quite here yet so I'll be ready just in time for bikini season.

One more thing I kept forgetting to add was HOW I paid for this, which is pretty interesting. I'm sure some of you have heard of the site www.myfreeimplants.com (which I initially thought was a big scam) but rest assured, my new boobies are because of this! Granted it did take me maybe 5 months to raise all the money and several months after that to even get it, but if you're a grad school student like me trying to save, it's definitely worth the time and effort. Feel free to contact me with any questions, I'm more than happy to help! Going to get some work done so I don't have a boat load when I'm recovering!