Hi to anyone reading this.this is to pay it...
Hi to anyone reading this.this is to pay it forward as I have been stalking this site for quite a while and all you brave woman who share something so personal have helped to make me realise I am not alone in how I feel..you support each other when our own friends and family can not or will not.so thank you.
I am now 44 year old woman with 3 beautifull adult children ,weight 56kilos and 163cm tall, with mentor500cc high profile textured implants.
So as to my story it all started when I was an 11 year old girl. I had the misfortune to develope early and ended up being very large chested.an 10 g australian sizing.my back hurt I had to give up horse ridding ,ballet and gymnastics.my mum made appointments at surgeons who said I was to young ,they made me wait till I was 16. By then I had I put on weight as I was so unhappy,and my breasts got bigger and sagged.so at 16 I had a reduction and lift.i knew I would have scars none of my friends would have but that would be the trade off for feeling more normal.they turned out great a nice firm perky 10c full or small 10d.yayyyy.fast forward meet my husband and we had a baby,then another one.my breast went bye bye ? They became flat top bottem heavy and a little saggy?my mum had implants and loved hers and said I would feel better if I was more like my old self as I was suffering from low self esteem at the time.this was in 1994 about March.there was no information given at that time and they only did saline as was not long after silicone problems came to media attention. I cannot remember size but I think about 350 over muscle.was a nice 10d again.these where in for many years no capsular contraction or other problems that I have now.had another baby ( surprise) breast feed again but did have trouble so stoped after 6 weeks.many years later had rippling and with weight gain I was 10 f.started to feel fake and a bit slutty as my kids where late teens.also noticed I was cold all the time and could not tummy sleep as they where in my way.decided to get a tummy tuck much longed for after my 3 kids and youngest was 16 then .dr I saw when I asked him told me I would be miserable if I had them OUT.he would not do it as I would need reconstruction after better to put new implants in.he said silicone textured implants would mean no problems,no moving around and no rippling.so like an idiot I agreed..we talked size we thought about 375-400..when I woke up I cried they where huge...he had put in 500 high profile textured silicone. They did settle down over the next couple of weeks swelling went down.thank god .I looked like Dolly Parton.no offence she is great.then I started feeling all these weird changes.this is a list of the following things I have noticed since having these silicone bags put in,hard ball Breasts,little nipple feeling,stretched nipples,double bubble boob,extreme cold breast area,cold hands and feet,sore underside feet after sitting when I stand,peeling inner ear canal ,weird infection on my toe area,dry eyes,hair growth in strange places,brittle hair and nails,slower hair growth on my head,no memory ,cannot concentrate,foggy brain,pins and needle tingles in hands and feet,chest pain searing stabbing,chronic back neck shoulder pain,insomnia,headaches,tummy upsets ,constipation,pee smells weird,no sex drive,tired all the time.so moody ,weight gain ,puffy face,strange rashes on my face,absolutely no immunity at all.am sick with anything going around.
Now as the only thing I have changed in my life is my implants nothing else,same life style same house,same food etc I am defiantly thinking my implants have to have played a part.especially after reading what the other ladies have shared here.
So after much debate with myself I made the decision to have them OUT!!!!!
I made appointments with many different surgeons here in Australia ,however most here only want to do implant exchange.i had one tell me he would not what I was asking as I would look awful after and his job was to make people look better.another issue I had was there are not a lot of Drs here that do fat transfer and I knew I wanted this as well.as I have always had beasts except those first 10 years of my life I knew I would feel incomplete.please don't tell me I am an idiot or vain,I can only say how I feel.i know I don't want to be huge a c would be nice..
I finally found a dr I was comfortable with.his initial consultation should have been about 30 mins but I asked so many questions it was about 1 hour and 30 mins.at no time did he rush me,he answered all my questions honestly even if it was not what I wanted to hear.i left there with a tentative appointment for 3 weeks later.
Date changed for surgery
My surgery which supposed to be three weeks from that appointment got bumped to the 5th of June as the anaesthesiologist they wanted was unavailable.i had another appointment with the dr and took alist of question I had forgotten to ask him.after the last one I did not think I had any more however I filled a whole page.poor dr but he was very patient and understanding and I know he is payed to do this job but trust me some Drs are rude and condescending as I know some of you ladies have also found. I will be having this done in 2 operations now instead of one as this will hopefully give me my best out come.this was one of the things we discussed on 2nd visit.
1st op will be lipo to upper arms,inside thigh area,upper and lower abs,waist and flank area.i weigh about 56 kilos so not a lot in one area so need to get from multiple.wish he fix my butt lol.but he said you can't do everything ,pick your concerns,meaning my breasts.oh well.we are hoping to get about 1 1/2 litres so that 500 tops can go in each breast.he explained worst case would mean 1/2 that could be lost.which is fine by me as Dont won't to have breast as big as this 10g now.would love to be a 10d again.will not be doing the scar vision and any excess skin this time as need it to allow for the fullness.less likely fat to die due to pressure .
2nd op will remove old scar and pull tighter in about 3 months,also if any extra fat left over from last time (they have special fat storage who knew )can have atop up if needed.
Have spoken plenty of times with his assistant who is caring and attentive,they have really tried to work with all my issues.i have major problems after generals,constant vomiting for 3 days last time and lots of allergies to medications.so they are very carefull about all of this.i even had the anaestesioligist call me at home to discuss all of my past history and information he needed.he even gave me his number to call and ask anything I needed.i was given different instructions to any I have been given before, but I trust in what he said.it made sense .gaterade the night before to boost my electrolytes and small fluid after 12 but no more than 4 hrs before to reduce chances of being dehydrated.am starting to get nervous now as only week and a bit away.
My husband and I have talked about this to the point I think if I mention it one more time his head will explode.he did not understand at first,as he thought they where fine.but when I explained all the research I had done and that I thought they where the reason that all these new medical issues I was having could be related he started to understand.then he went a bit mental when I told him they where silicone, for some reason he thought they where saline.probably because my last ones where.as he works in an industry where a lot of chemicals are used he knows all the different ones I told him where used in the process of silicone implants.he told me there employees are not allowed to use a lot of those chemicals and some counties like China don't even allow it so what is it doing in my body !!! He loves my boobs probably more than I do,they are his favourite cuddle hold area,but I must admit I don't really like him touching them any more especially when we are in bed.cant feel much with them anyway.so I showed him heaps of after pics both good and bad results to prepair him.anyway I think I scarred the hell out of him.so when we talked honestly,he said I don't know how I am going to feel about your breasts after.i said that's ok I don't know how I'm going to feel about them after.i could love them or I could cry for ever..we agreed there are always those lacy crop tops if need be till I feel more accepting of my body again and he also has time to adjust.he said regardless of your boobs good or bad I love YOU not your boobs there just extras.
The assistant rang me today and finalised my garment order,medication list,final payment,time for op and next day after op appointment to change dressings and check drains.
I forgot to mention that I have capsular contraction baker Iv I think was the medical term.
I don't have private cover not that it would cover much anyway and this is a lot of money even though Drs is discounting it anyway. So I am praying for a good outcome.will let you ladies know how I go.am posting some breast pics.will post some bodies ones later for comparison .
Driving myself crazy
Hi it is Sunday night here and my surgery is on Friday morning.i can not seem to think of anything else and keep asking myself if I have made the right choice? Should I cancel,should I remove only,should I remove and do scar revision.i just need it over with so I can get on width my life.i have never had lipo before so any hints or suggestions would be much appreciated,ways to deal with the garment,bruising etc.i only bump myself a bruise a heap I think I will probably look like I got hit by a truck.lol.
To vtharp (who suggested my dr give me a good bra) or anyone who has had fat transfer to the breasts what is a good post bra ?
Also I know this is a very personal question but I'm not sure who else to ask how did you ladies deal with having periods whilst having to wear the compression garments ?inside the garment and undies over,or attached to undies over garment .thanks for any help.
Some pre op body photos
These are some pre lipo shots will try and take some better ones in daylight .
Day before surgery
Am really nervous .. 2 days ago my throat started to get a little sore and my nose got runny and I thought nooooo.i don't want to postpone this.i just want it over.so I have been in a sauna 2 times and hot bath with salts and eucalyptus oil to try clearing it out.also gargling throat stuff,seems to have helped.am now getting my area ready for after.putting a yoga mat on my bed with old sheets over it so my mattress does not get leaked fluids on it.having all my meds near bed putting my after clothes in a bag etc.my husband is taking the day off work so he can drive me (8-30 drop )and pick me up.im hoping he will be ok with how I am after as he has never seen me after surgery.my mum helped with first implant as he was in another state and the second one I went overseas for.i am pretty good with pain but I have extreme nausea after any general anaesthetics .last time vomited for 3 days.hoping for much less sickness this time as doug my anaestesioligist is going to do his best for me.fingers crossed.will try adding photos again,if it doesn't take I will add them with after shots.this is so nerve racking ,why do we do some of the things we do to ourselves ? I am normally a strong ,confident,intellegant woman,however I bought into a false sense of what I thought I needed to look like.now whatever happens I realise looks come and go but your health is priceless.i do not do do many things I love anymore due to these implants. Yoga ,Pilates ,massage,tummy sleeping,horse ridding,hiking,skiing,because laying on them is so uncomfortable, or you need to wear 2 crop tops / sport bras to stop bouncing,they stop your range of movement. Funny how our perception of what we are or should be changes,I see woman with big breasts now and don't think ,you look sexy .i think boy I bet your back hurts..I admire woman who love themselves for who they are flaws and all.i just wish I had learnt that ability many dollars and years ago.for all us post baby woman especially,we created life yet we push ourselves to look like we never had a baby.i am only now learning to love my stretch marks as without them I would not have 3 of the most precious things in my world .my children..once this 2 part operation is complete this will be the last lot of surgery I will be having,I am not going to chase perfection.which is what some of my family seem to think,I am happy to grow older gracefully,but I want to do this now and not be miserable for many more years letting this consume me and my ability to enjoy my life.sorry about the rant but I feel I can vent a bit on here and no one will judge me.as we are all going thru something of our own.good will and hope for the future to all the woman out there.i will post more from the other side.probably gave ipad in one hand and a bucket in the other.lol
Morning of surgery
Well I've been up since the crack of dawn,had my small glass of water at 5.20 as stated by my dr.just put a load of washing on had shower etc.could not sleep last night due to nerves so finally fall asleep around 1-30 ,so a bit tired.but as they are going to knock me out at around 9ish figure it won't really matter and I'm sure to sleep over next couple of days.well I have a bag packed with stuff for after op at day center
-Spare undies for going over lipo garment so my privates are covered.- lip balm- hair elastics- ipad for photos-my favourite tea bags and biscuits for post surgery sugar - towel to walk to car- bucket in car- blanket - pillow.
Am wearing daggy track pants and a zip up hoody in black as this was recommended to get on and off easy .as would stain any light colour clothing due to fluid leakage.
Am praying will not be so nauseous as other times,as have been advised that if vomiting continually will have to be admitted to hospital and that is not in my cost so would be extra.thousands a day here in Australia ,so better not happen !!!anyway going now see you on the other side.thank you to the ladies who have wished me well it is much appreciated ????
Over and done,oh yeah !!!
5 Jun 2015
Day of treatment
Well all I can say is they are worth the money as far as keeping you looked after.cant say for results yet. To start with everyone was lovely and they triple check everything.my height,weight ,all my allergies.had my red id bracket and red hair( that's new to me ) for allergy.had 2 tablets before,then anesthetiser came ran thru everything put 2 cannulas in my arm.they put me on bed to relax with warm donna thing that has hot air blown into it .so toasty,no cold feet for me.also my dr came and we talked about what we where doing and our expectation,then the fun part.strip down and arts and crafts time on my body.lots of green markings.hehe.then back under blanket.then in op room ,something in a cannula drowsy then OUT.woke up groggy,but NO nausea,none.first time ever,at eight had tonsils out ,vomited so had split area opened and haemorrhaged.rushed back to theatre .so long history.first person ever to listen to me and not give me bloody maxalone alone,as if....everyone kept checking me all good just groggy.and needing to pee constinantly..ladies lot of fluids in you so expect lots of peeing and fluid leakage .i thought I wet myself,but no just fluids.he stuck around and checked me till 4ish I think,groggy.dr david talked to me and explained everything,I did not have much fat under there after all,mainly stretched skin,to he had to try really hard.he got 900ml .he put 250ish I think was still groggy will check with him later.he kept 100ml to fill in if needed say behind nipple maybe?bit disappointed as will losse some of this ,can't lie hoping for more.but as long as my nipple does not cave in that is great! hubby picked me up and we went home.look on his face,sheer relief.i made it thru and no vomiting .he called all my family for me told them everything good. Ride home pretty good 50 mins no sickness and little sore,but nothing to bad.thank goodness for the big European pillow or he probably need a new seat all that fluid.got settled and had tea and toast.stayed down,that's a first for me after surgery,texted my anaesthetist to say a massive thank you.if you have ever been as sick as me after ops you know the difference they make...my Drs assistant ranea( she's awesome) called and checked on me,will she her tomorrow.they are all great. So far no pain meds just my antibiotics and arnica pills with dinner.will post pics my dr took before later got to get them. This me now ,swollen and so hot in my undies over garment .lol
Photo ,swollen !!!
5 Jun 2015
Day of treatment
Just read post,please forgive crazy spelling,some is auto correction some is drugs,still groggy.this is one of my cats keeping me company on an old towel on my bed.i rescued him and his 5 siblings and mum at 1 week old.we got homes for others but kept him and His sister because he had separation anxiety and hated everyone else out of fear. He is such a smoochy boy and a mega suck up !!
Love all them to bits and could not lock them out of my room,just have to be bit carefull.
1 day after,sore and stiff
Sorry have not updated this is what happened that night and next day.Well the drugs wore off about 12-30 at night and soreness came...was having to get up every 1 hour to go pee,seemed never ending .also was leaking a large amount of fluid.to help with this I put 2 pads inside the back of my garment lower back bottom area.then another one in undies over the top of garment.this helped a lot.i then changed them every 2 hrs or so.not much sleep for me.about 3 hrs of broken sleep so very tired.had to go to dr to get drains out 1 hr drive there and then I had renew Drs nurse remove garment ,take out drains,clean me up a little ,tape my incisions.then the nice bit a warm soothing light.it is infrared beams.designed to help the healing process.10 mins breast area,then tummy and finally thighs.nice warm feeling,nearly fell asleep.lol.then garment back on dressed and drive home.have to go see them again on wed or Thursday to have arm wraps off and abdomen padding removed.its glued on I believe.that will be fun,waxed tummy here I come.i bet there will all that sticky adhesive marks like when you take a bandaid off.except this will be all lot more to scrap off.fun...can't really shower yet as not able to get those wet,just keep wash clothing me clean.these are pics,bruising not as bad as I thought but can't see tummy yet.nurse thought I would have more bruising,am taking 2 arnica pills 3 times a day.disappointed with amount of fat gotten as hoping for more.only 900mls usable,but he tried ,even doing more areas to get some.my body did not have useable fat,just skin it seems.so fat was used so breast had a slope not carved in from implant.am worried how much will last..as we hoped for 500 with 250 staying.now less than 350 so maybe 175 staying.a lot of effort for little difference.but I will wait and see..they are droppy as expected,as no lift .we are waiting to see how they firm up.all in all not as bad as I thought they might be.that is why I did fat transfer because was really concerned that such large implants would give me nipples sucked inwards.if all the fat transfer did was stop that from happening I would be thankful.but a lot of lipo to go thru .i warn you....will update in a week .
Late up date for 1 week
16 Sep 2015
3 months post
At 4 days and 1 week when I had a do foam removed took a proper shower and it was bliss as was so itchy.i had been using arnica on all my bruised areas 2+ times a day and oil and then firming lotion on my breasts in an inward and upward massage motion while always supporting from underneath.i wore there bra till 2 weeks then swapped for maternity bras that felt better and easier to wear under normal clothing.at night I always wear those stretchy cup bras similar to the ahh bra.i get mine from best and less for $10 yo $15 each ,they are indorse do by breast cancer council.i recommend to everyone as they have little triangle foam pads that give a bit of shape and size .they helped me while I was adjusting to my new look and kept helped to keep breast area firm . I massaged firming lotion all over my body then put on my compression garment.to help with my arms as there are saggy( they always where even before lipo) I wore elastic tube bandages that I cut to size .very affective and cheap. Bruising was gone by 2 weeks so I think arnica internally taken by tablet 3 times a day and externally applied helped me.as normally I bruise horribly and for a long time.i found breast area to be pain free however was sore and stiff from lipo. I started walking for 30 mins a day and light exercising after 2 weeks and these relieved the stiffness.i increased exercise program after the 4week mark and then slacked off as winter here and cold and rainy.as everyone said final results would not be seen for 3 months etc I decided not to post heaps of in between pics as I was becoming a bit obsessed.lol.looking for changes . So next pics are at Drs 3 month check up.
Pics for 1 week
16 Sep 2015
3 months post
Trouble loading ,try again
Pics after foam off and stitches out
16 Sep 2015
3 months post
Sorry my husband did not keep the arm ones or the ones which arms away from chest
3 month results !!Good ,bad and the ugly...
16 Sep 2015
3 months post
Ok so I decided not to do daily,weekly updates as was driving myself crazy .people kept saying wait,wait ,wait!!!
You will not see your results till about 3 months.then it would be more stable,so here goes.i went to see my dr on Monday was a little nervous as I hate taking my clothes off in front of people.and yes I know he has seen it all before but still I feel weird.he is lovely and try's to make it less embarrassing but I perspire a LOT with my nerves.awwww.we talk about everything,how I used those bandages,my own idea,sleeping in those elastic bras,lotions etc.he is happy with my healing and current results.yipeee.we do the new photos and compare side to side.my god you forget very quickly how big your breasts used to be.the lipo areas are a more subtle improvement. There is a marked difference on my lower back ,love handle area,can see inner thigh improvement but am not as sold on upper arms.they where always heavier even from a teenager so I think skin a little to stretched to retract well.its funny the more I fix I ten notice other areas! I have always hated that back fat but it seems more noticeable now ,probably cause breasts a not pulling skin forward..I asked him about it and he honestly gave his thoughts that I would only be a slight improvement if I had lipo.so to me not worth it.probably just as well I don't think my husband would be thrilled with more lipo,he says "you look great " .men? We then talked about the things I did not like and that is my areole are not shrinking.they are stretched and not evenly shaped with one bring lower.also one breast is smaller than the other.i have been using a little foam insert I bought at bra shop to even it out.as you always to shop to the size of larger breast.only a couple of dollars.also good to use in bikinis I discovered.i have a small amount of fat about 100ml left do he is going to put 40+ in the right to top up and split the rest,so about 30 in left and 70 all up in right.we are going to do the scar revision as planned from before 1st operation.i am glad I waited as we have a better idea of where my natural breast crease should be and where it is currently.we are going to remove skin in a sickle moon smile pattern .this will bring skin down to where crease should be tighten area and removing all previous scarring.hopefully 1 fine line ? Also thinking about reducing my areole and making symmetrically round again while lifting the lower in line.depends on money really.i would like to but cost is always an issue.have to think about this hard....am glad I did not do a lift at the time and lucky for me my dr is not the kind to try to talk you into it..I wanted to see natural outcome first.
As to the fat transfer? I will never know how much was me and how much stayed from fat transfer,maybe if I did this with hindsight I would say if you have Brady tissue of your own take out implants first,then wait 3 months and do fat transfer if needed.if you have no breast tissue then I would do it straight away as will probably help with your esteem.i am very grateful my nipples did cave in or adhere inwards...that was one of my biggest fears.not sure if it's luck,genetics or a good dr but am grateful .
will let you know what I decide regarding surgery and when.will also do 6 month and 1 year review because I liked seeing long term results when I was looking at reviews.
16 Sep 2015
3 months post
My iPad went flat ,so load again