21, Emotional Roller Coaster with Silicone 275 Cc's. Vancouver, BC

Hi Realsealf, so Ive tried staying off this for the past week, Ive been finding myself wandering this website like a drone, getting caught up in comparing my results to other girls on this site, and I constantly have to remind myself how different everybody's bodies and lifestyles are, envy is such a dangerous emotion. Im happy for everybody who's had amazing results to say the least, and for the females that have allowed a BA to motivate them to exercise reaching their goal body.

Im unsure about exercising right now. I am used to olympic lifting, which of course I am unable to do for at least another couple months. So when Im at the gym Im only doing accessory exercises, squatting on the smith machine etc.

What sort of exercises are you guys performing in the gym 5 weeks post op?

Ive also gotten back on my bike, not on any sort of crazy excursions bc Ive found that Im getting winded / out of breath / an increased heart rate compared to before my surgery. Bluhh Im sort of scared that this might encourage capsule contracture.

I am also contemplating deleting my account on this website. I don't think that it is no longer beneficial to watch other females progressions as everyone heals at different rates, and it might be driving me slightly crazy wondering why my implants aren't dropping and other girls are. On the other hand I created this blog in hopes that someone pre op or contemplating getting a BA can gain something from reading my review and browsing through my photos. But Im not too sure if it has helped anyone though.

I attached a photo of my tiny invisible incision marks under my arms

The more I read other peoples reviews, I realize that pessimism in the beginning of this whole procedure is almost innate! The first 2 weeks after my surgery I tried to justify not being completely happy ("its my surgeon, its my implant size, I should've gone over the muscle!"). But in all honesty I realize now that, that was just a fury of negative emotions brought on possibly from this sudden change in my body, or from being immobile and not being able to ride my bike or go to the gym. Maybe it was anger towards my family as I only stayed at my parents house 2 days post op, after then I came home to my studio, and as immobile and in pain as I was, somehow survived by myself.

I guess in comparison to some other peoples reviews my surgeon has been great. He gave me his number and told me that I was able to call him at any time if I felt something was wrong. I've already seen him twice since the procedure (Im 24 days post) and have another appointment booked in 2 and a half weeks to see him again for a check up. Also, our first consultation was over an hour where I realize now, he actually showed how fankenboob I was going to look for the first few weeks after surgery, (which Im assuming my excitement for new boobs probably dwarfed).

Also, my slight anger towards not going bigger has ceased. Prior to my surgery I would look at girls in my gym who had gotten implants and for those who had gotten what Id guess is 350cc+, Id think although big breasts are nice to look at, there is an underlying 'I like attention' or maybe its a 'I hold sexuality in high regard' message. Something I didn't want to portray. Also, when I strut across the room or hop down the stairs Im like 'ow ow ow ow' the weight of them bouncing up and down hurts! Even when I bend over in yoga my implants follow gravity and push against my skin, I have to hold them as if they're going to fall out of my skin. My friends are like 'stop grabbing your boobs' but Im just holding them down!) I can't imagine the pain of them if they were much bigger. And lastly, one reason why I chose smaller implants was to imitate the look of such females I've seen in [RS bleep] (everyone watches it, and Im sure has boob envy of someone they've seen). I prefer the appearance of a full round chest, maybe I associate it with some sort of innocent youthfulness. And I assume the smaller the implants you chose the slower gravity takes over?
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Anyone experiencing boob greed or contemplating what size to chose definitely consider all of these factors. It seems that boob greed is so common. Its like we see females in comics and such and think that massive round breasts is what we need for a feminine body, or maybe its what we think other people need to see on us to view us as feminine, or sexually appealing. Its easy to get caught up in those thoughts (especially when we have the opportunity to chose any boob size wed like) opposed to functionality or even just appreciating our own bodies without comparing them to lets say someone else we've seen on this site or someone exploited in pop culture.

Happy unboob greed everybody!