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POSTED UNDER Breast Implant Removal REVIEWS

Can't wait to be healthy and natural - Ireland, IE

ORIGINAL POST

I wasn't sure if I should post in the forum or...

Nymeria84
WORTH IT$2,850

I wasn't sure if I should post in the forum or here, but as I will hopefully be updating this over the next few months I thought it was better here.


My name is Gill and I'm 28 years old, and I hate my breast implants.
I have been lurking on this site for quite a while and reading people'sstories has been really inspirational. I wanted to start my story somewhere, apologies if this is the wrong place to post as I haven't yet booked my implant removal surgery, and it may be a few months before I can afford it...I really just wanted to write down how I'm feeling about it all.

I'm so angry at myself for being in this situation, I have only had my implants for a few years (since April 2009), but I feel like such a different person than I was then. The most irritating thing is that I researched and waited for years before finally having them done. I had wanted bigger boobs for as long as I can remember, maybe since I was about 16, but I waited until I was 24 and still really wanted them. At the time I remember feeling that I was making a grown up decision, having waited so long, but now I look back and see it was just based on insecurity and hoping that bigger breasts would solve all my problems....oh dear.


I read countless stories online, and although I was aware of the risks of things going wrong but I kept telling myself that I was in good health, and that the chances of it happening were small. I remember the mantra I used to tell myself as the surgery date got closer, it was 'if I don't get them, I will always wonder'. That seems quite ridiculous now. Looking back, I actually had nice little perky breasts that suited my frame, that looked good in dresses, not the oversized ones that stick out of my chest and make me look so frumpy.

I'm quite lucky that I have actually not had huge problems with them, they look ok (if a little big and bulky for my frame), and they feel ok (most of the time), and for a year or two they didn't bother me. Then about a year ago I started to notice pain and discomfort but it never lasted that long so I just pretended it was fine. In the last six months the pain has gotten worse, I now get pains down both my arms. This is mostly at night when I'm lying on my back (the only way I can sleep...oh how I long to sleep on my stomach again, or even on my side). Obviously since the PIP scandal I have been more aware of the potential for things to go wrong (I emailed my surgeon and he reassured me that I don't have PIPs, so I felt a bit better), but basically I'm just sick of them - sick of the worry and anxiety of waiting for something to go wrong. I'm worried about the long term effect on my health, and i'm just embarrassed that I ever thought it was a good idea to do this to myself.

Anyway, my financial situation has changed quite a bit from 4 years ago, I am now back in University, living on a very small amount and wondering how am I ever gonna fund the removal surgery. It will most likely be the end of this year, or longer before I have the money together and in the mean time the stress and worry will be horrible.
It's sad because overall I feel that I am in a good place, studying something that I love, with a good future ahead of me, but with this cloud of fear and anxiety about my health hanging over me until I get this sorted.

Anyway, sorry that was so long, thanks to anyone who read it. This is mainly for myself, a place to be open about how this had affected me, I haven't really told anyone in real life about it. If you can believe it, most people didn't really know that I had gotten implants (they were only 250cc's) and I got them done while I was working abroad for a few years, and I used to wear padded bras religiously so most people thought I had just put on a bit of weight. Anyway, I'm so angry and embarrassed at being in this ridiculous situation.

Thanks for reading, if anyone in a similar situation has any words of advice that would be great.


I will try to update in the next few months, I just wanted to get the ball rolling.
Thanks.

Nymeria84's provider

Dr Colin Riordan

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Replies (14)

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January 23, 2013

This is the perfect place for you to post! I'm sorry you're so full of regret. I do think it's true that you probably would still be wondering if you hadn't done it. An expensive life lesson, but life is a journey, right?

Lots of women who've gotten implants feel the same way you do. Please don't beat yourself up.

Update here at will! I'll be following your story with interest.

(Glad you don't have the PIPS)

January 23, 2013
Hi Angie, thanks so much for your support. I have been really inspired over the last while reading stories on here - it's so nice not to be judged and to know there are other people who understand. Just wanted to correct an error in my original post - I have 275cc's. For some reason I thought they were 250, but I have rechecked the email my surgeon sent. Anyway, thanks again I will hopefully update with good news soon.
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January 28, 2013

Fingers crossed for you!

January 24, 2013
I agree about not beating yourself up. We all do things in life and down the road wonder why. :) And you would have always wondered about it. So now you are just a little wiser. I haven't cared for mine for awhile and one of them slipped recently so I had to "fix" it. I was thrilled because it made me research taking them out. My doctor wanted me to see what I would look like (I breasted four beautiful children, so there is nothing left) so he deflated them. I knew I was going to want them removed but agreed to go home and see how I felt. Within a day, I wanted them out. It's certainly an adjustment. They were very pretty and now they look empty and saggy. But I love that I feel like myself again! My explant is next week and will be done with local anesthesia in the office. It will cost me less than $600. It's my bday present to myself. :)
January 31, 2013
I want to have mine removed as well. When I got mine, I got more than I ordered. I just wanted a C and ended up with 34DD. Mine are saline, can a person really get them removed for $600.00 with local anesthesia in the office. I am loving the sound of that!!! What part of the county do you live? I am in Houston, TX. If I could get mine removed for $600.00 in the doctors office I would make an appointment in the morning!!!
February 5, 2013
Hello Winry, I had my 18 yr old saline implants removed in the doctors office with local anesthesia.It was a breeze.My plastic surgeon is a Dr.Wuest in Conroe Texas. My cost, $500.00 and two follow up visits included.No drains needed.Only took a prescribed round of antibiotics before surgery and one pain med after.Before surgery, in the office, I took one anti anxiety pill a few mins before the surgery. One implant had already deflated and he deflated the other during the procedure and just pulled them both out.I felt no pain .The needle pricks were very slight in discomfort for the local.The staff were very good and understanding.I was also fitted with a front closure bra and wrapped with a large Ace bandage and given a larger front closure bra to take home in case the one I wore home was too tight. I highly recommend this doctor.His office is near the Conroe Regional hospital complex in, Conroe Texas. I was feeling great in just two days afterwards.Good luck and best wishes.
January 24, 2013
Hi Annie, thanks for the support, and what a wonderful birthday gift to yourself. I hope all goes well, be sure and come back to update. It's very uplifting to hear all the positive stories of women on here who regained their sense of self after the implant removal. When my time comes I will appreciate my teeny tiny boobies more than I ever would have before. MY regret is now turning to hope for the future. For the moment, all I can do is make my plans. I have been doing more research (spurred on by this site) and have gotten a few quotes for surgery, it will be about five thousand euros or so, that is with a top surgeon as I want to ensure I'm in good hands and have proper aftercare available in case something goes wrong. My right breast is at least a size smaller than the left one, it wasn't always like that so I think there may be a leak in that one. I lay awake last night worrying about it, and I think I will bite the bullet and tell my mother about my situation and ask for her help. I never told her before as I knew she would try to talk me out of it and be disappointed. I remember when I was about 15 or 16 I felt so down about my small breasts that I told her I wanted surgery and she was very upset. She kept telling me that I was beautiful and didn't need them - it took until now for me to realise that she was right. I am also thinking of asking for my parents help financially, as that is the only way I will be able to get them removed in the next 6 months or so. I was thinking about a loan from the credit union in my parents name that I would make small repayments on would work for me, so I'm not expecting them to pay. I will fly back home in April and ask them. For now I play the waiting game. I'm still hoping for June or July time for surgery, although I would happily have them out tomorrow.
January 25, 2013
Hi Sweet Girl. I really just wanted to remind you that you aren't alone in this . . . This group of honest woman are so supportive and helpful. Forgive yourself--and remember that we all make mistakes. The best part of all this is that you can undo things, you can once again be just you, and time does heal so much of these wounds. Praying for peace for you . . . Big hug. A
January 25, 2013
Thanks Amanda, its great to know there are others who understand. Having a bad day today, lots of pain in my left breast. Six months seems like a long time to wait :-(
January 28, 2013
I have no words of wisdom, but can tell you I feel the exact same. I even have the same cc's(275). I've only had mine for 1 year, but feels like an eternity as they have consumed my thoughts. They feel so weird to me, and I feel them looking so odd to me, I dislike them more and more, and I am angry with myself that I ever had the vanity to do it in the first place. It was something I had wanted for so long, and now I just wishi could turn back time with the knowledge I have now. It is a life lesson, and an expensive one, but I know that I will appreciate my natural body, so it is a necessary one. Like you, I haven't told anyone(not even my husband who is my best friend). I wish you peace in your decision, and hope you do what is right for you.
January 28, 2013
Hi Daisy, 'consumed my thoughts' pretty much describes the last few months - especially recently as I have been experiencing a lot of pain in both breasts. Six months seems like a long time to wait when I feel that more damage is being done the longer they are in. A necessary life lesson is a very good way of describing it, if I had not gotten implants in the first place I probably always would have coveted them. Now I know better. When I finally get them out I want to concentrate on being healthy first and foremost. I feel guilty sometimes that some people go through illness and disease through no fault of their own, but I chose to put myself through this for no other reason than vanity and insecurity. In some way, this is my penance I suppose. Apologies for sounding really dramatic, I have been feeling very sorry for myself lately. Anyway, all we can do is look forward to the time when we will be free of these bags of burden.
UPDATED FROM Nymeria84
3 months pre

Not much of an update in terms of the actual...

Nymeria84
Not much of an update in terms of the actual surgery, but a few days ago I plucked up the courage and told my mother about everything. It is such a relief to be able to talk to someone in real life about this. She was worried about me for a while, she thought I was depressed and thinking of dropping out of University, so in some ways it was a relief that she knows what is wrong. She has been so supportive and non-judgmental, and promised to help as much as she can. I know my parents couldn't afford to pay for surgery (it will be about €4,000 because I want removal and a capsulectomy), but I am saving for some of it, and she said they will get a loan out for the rest of it.
I have two consultations lined up for when I fly home in a few months. At the moment I am counting down the time, and trying not to let it distract me too much from University work.
Even though I will still have to wait 3 or 4 months for surgery, I feel happier knowing my parents are supporting me. I still havent uploaded a photo yet, I havent got my camera with me but will do that when I fly home in April for a few days. This will be the summer of me getting me real self back, can't wait!

Replies (0)

UPDATED FROM Nymeria84
3 months pre

I have finally booked my initial consultation with...

Nymeria84
I have finally booked my initial consultation with the PS, it's not until the 17th of May but that is sooner than I had originally thought it would be so I am happy. She is a board certified Plastic Surgeon with a good reputation and is a specialist in breast reconstruction for cancer patients so I have high hopes for her.
I am still not sure whether I will need a breast MRI, but we will decide that at my consultation. Very excited, counting down the days.

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