I'm 5'4", 120lbs. Currently fitting a 32B and...
I'm 5'4", 120lbs. Currently fitting a 32B and looking to move up to a full C/small D. I'm very active and enjoy high intensity interval training, weights and yoga.
I feel my body measurements are slightly off. I'm lacking the curve and fullness in my chest to balance my bottom.
I've never lacked in confidence but do wish to fill out some of my tops better. Especially bikinis, tanks, and workout wear.
Getting a BA was always in the back of my mind. But it recently became more of an affirmative thought since I began training more intensely and noticed I'm losing volume (aka fat) in my chest. I love the changes in my body except my chest. Through training, eating clean and feeling amazing I feel a small part of me is missing to complete the total package.
I guess it's more of an enhancement I'm looking for. Nothing outrageous or extraordinary.
32B hope to get full C small D
Here's a pic of me currently. I've been wearing 34B for the last 4 years and noticed I was no longer filling them in. Ever since I've upped my training I'm getting leaner and stronger! Down side is loosing body fat means loosing what little boobs I had too.
I wanted to create the look I hope to be after my BA with push up bras so I recently shopped for a new one and was told I'm a 32B. I've been wearing this bra a few weeks now. I'm hoping people will just get use to this look and the physical transformation will be subtle.
Pre-op pics barely filling them in
Thought I'd post some pre-op pics of me for future reference.
Profile pic is my boob inspiration
My profile pic is one of my boob idols, a look I'm inspiring to achieve after my BA. Maybe not idealistic since she is taller and has a more narrow frame. Here are pics of more wish boobs or ones I like the look of. I know that these ladies may or may not have the same stats or measurements as me. I'm showing them to my PS as a reference to what I like.
Playing with sizers
During my first consult I tried on sizers ranging from 320-400cc. I like how 350 looks. Very natural and subtle and 375 gives me that little extra umph which also looks nice.
I decided to make my own rice sizers in these two sizes. I've been wearing them during work and daily activities to get used to how they feel and look. It's also my way to visually transition my enhanced look seamlessly with those I see on a daily basis. Of course it's all in the tops I wear which help conceal them too.
I wear both 350cc and 375cc all day. The 375cc after 5-6 hours begins to make my shoulders hurt. I know I'm not wearing the correct bra for these. I'm wearing a sports bra with 34B soft cup bra over top, otherwise the sports bra doesn't offer enough support and the sizers look droopy. I now understand why so many bigger chested women experience back pain and shoulder stiffness. I will keep this in mind for the future and definitely shop for wide shoulder strap bras. The 350cc seem to be slightly lighter in weight with not as much projection.
Conceal & reveal with sizers
It's amazing how certain clothes can either conceal or reveal the size of ones boobs!
Here I'm wearing my 375cc sizers under 2 different tops. The dark grey T-shirt is what I wear at work. It's subtle enough and slightly conservative.
I have yet to wear the tight Tees with my sizers. It's a vava voom look I'm not ready to show off yet.
Mature women with implants....
With the weather being so cold I hit the hot tub in my condo. Relaxing in the waters along comes a mature woman I think in her early 50's sporting a bikini. She's 5'7" thin build with angular facial features and definitely has implants. Maybe a D cup. Of course I'm staring because since I've been on this journey I've been very attuned to others that have gotten a BA. My first thought was wow look at her boobs. Second thought.....look at her boobs and she's old. I apologize to anyone who may fit this description. I'm not here to offend anyone but just sharing some personal thoughts.
I guess my concern is will I look like this when I turn 50? It definitely was not attractive especially when her implants didn't sit smoothly on her body and looked more like they were just placed on top her boney chest wall. I'm sure they are proportioned to her anatomy at some point. Maybe when she first got them or younger. I'm sure if she was wearing more clothes she would look great but in a bikini or naked not so much :-(
If I look this way when my time comes I will consider a revision and get them smaller. With aging and loss of muscle mass and skin elasticity it simply doesn't look attractive.
Happy New Year! 2 week countdown...
I started my pre-op supplements today and will start to gather items needed for home recovery. May look into fresh prepared meals delivered just for the first week. Don't think I'll be much use being medicated. Will need to arrange for my dog walker to come over too. I'm not sure what else I need besides 2 bags of large frozen peas, Arnica Montana, and the Meds prescribed afterwards. They also gave me a post surgery bra to wear. I'll pick up two more so I can change them up while the others in the wash. Any suggestions on what else I should get that would help with recovery?
"Oh Honey you don't want that, those are old lady bras!"
I began nesting this weekend. Cleaned my place from top to bottom. Took my doggie to the groomers and ordered a weeks worth of Paleo meals from my local crossfit gym.
Today is second attempt to find a few more post surgery bras. The clinic gave me a black Wonder Bra style 2473 size 34C to wear post surgery. A tip I received from a woman who had a BA advised to have at least 3 on hand; one to wear, one in the wash and a dry one to change into after the shower. Apparently I will become BFF's with my post surgical bra LOL!!! And if I can find one that opens in the front even better. 24/7 even in the shower and while sleeping to keep the implants from migrating and help them settle and fit into the surgical pocket created by my surgeon.
I was at Sears since many members have mentioned it. Headed straight to the packaged and boxed bras. I was lost in a sea of Warner's, Wonder Bra and Playtex. Call me oblivious but I thought such bras became obsolete since the late 80's!
Wow 36/38/40 D/DD, nursing, minimizing, back support etc....looking confused and clearly out of place. A very sweet, grey haired woman approached me and ask if I needed help. I told her I was looking for a wire free, front closure bra with full support. She eyed me from head to toe and began to chuckle as she said "oh honey you don't want that those are old lady bras". I started laughing as I realized how ridiculous I must have looked holding a handful of bras that clearly were not in my size..... Yet haha!!!
I explained my situation and without batting an eye she completely understood my special request. And said that it will be a challenge since most sizes and styles don't come in 34C. Hmmm another reason why I've opted to downsize from 400cc to 375cc. Bra shopping is not easy. Bummer there was nothing left in my size.
Headed to Walmart and I was in luck! They have a great selection by Hanes. I picked up a front zip, high impact, sports bra in white, 2 brightly coloured bandinis (I've seen on other members) and a nude coloured softy (very comfy I can step into) that has a nice wide band that will not irritate my incisions in the crease. All in size medium. Tried them on with my sizers at home and so far they fit well.
I was also told to get button up lounge wear or PJs for easy access and comfort changing. Any arm movement raised to the side or front will be difficult at first. So I picked up a PJ set too. Not exactly something I wear to bed but since I'll have friends dropping in and out checking up on me and helping me out I figure this would be much more appropriate than my usual bedtime attire consisting of men's boxer briefs and a tank top.... LOL!
2 more days of work then off for 2 weeks to recover. I hope it's enough time. Surgeon says I'll be good to go and to start slow and not work to aggressively. He says I'm healthy and in excellent pre-op condition which is optimal for recovery and healing. Yeah!!! 3 more sleeps and feeling really calm.
One more sleep!
I woke up and hit the gym for one last HIIT. Finishing strong smashing out legs. I've stopped doing any chest exercises the last 2 months to give my pecs a chance to give into the implants. My mood is melancholy knowing I will not be visiting the place for at least 2-3 weeks. This makes me most anxious not the BA itself. I've been working hard the past year getting myself into optimal state mentally and physically. I know it'll all be muscle memory once I get back into it. I will be extra diligent and strict with my diet. This will at least keep my weight stable and easier to build muscle again.
Took it easy today. Worked a half day. Got myself a haircut, then mani/pedi and treated myself to a 90 minute massage. Picked up last minute groceries for power smoothies in the morning. Spinach, beets, broccoli, coconut water, almond milk, pineapple and blueberries.
Packing the things I need to bring with me to surgery. Cozy socks, track pants, zip up hoodie, wireless bra, facial wipes (I know my face is going to feel icky), bottled water and throat lozenges (I hear your throat gets sore and scratchy). I'm also going to write down my emergency contact info and let the nurse know incase I'm too drowsy to communicate with them.
Just took a Melatonin to ease myself to dreamland. Surgery is scheduled for 8am and I'm the first appt. Feeling good and ready.
A shout out to all the amazing BA members on Realself and family and friends who have offered such sincere support, guidance, reassurance and love. I thank you for making this journey as smooth as possible. I look forward to recovering alongside others this month. Good luck to you all and see you on the other side with new boobies!
15 Jan 2014
Day of treatment
Surgery day has finally arrived. I'm the first appt. scheduled for 8am and arrived at the clinic for 7:15am for my pre -op prep. I was greeted by Lily one of the nurses and was escorted to a cozy bedroom to get changed into my gown and robe. Lilly returned with my consent forms to sign and told me I can relax before the doctors come in.
Dr. Chang my anesthesiologist came and introduced herself. She talked about the anesthesia. She asked me a few questions about my reactions with motion sickness. She reassured me she will accommodate the nausea with some other medications while they wake me up.
At 7:45am Dr. Edelstein came to take my measurements. He was cheerful and calm. With his sharpie pen he drew and outlined the parimeters of my chest wall. He didn't rush and took the care and the time needed. We went over the surgery process again and he gave his reassurance. I was positive and knew I was literally in good hands.
At 8:10am Lily came to escort me down the hall to the operating room. I got on the operating table and pillows were placed under my knees and head for comfort. Dr. Chang inserted my IV and hooked up my ECG to monitor. Another nurse wrapped my lower legs in some sort of massaging apparatus. Sort of like the Dr. Ho's neck massager.....lol. I think it's to help facilitate blood flow while I'm under. I hear Dr. Chang advise me of a slight burning feeling in my arm as she injects the anesthesia. I feel a slight stinging sensation and that's all I recalled. Wow the meds work fast!
Recovery room chatter...
15 Jan 2014
Day of treatment
"Take deep breathes, time to wake up.... We're all finished you did great."
It's 11:15am and feeling slightly groggy but no nausea. Thanks Dr. Chang!!! As I came to, the nurse (who's name I forgot...so sweet) removed my IV and propped me up. She explained my post op care instructions and gave me my prescription.
My body felt heavy and sluggish. No pain but pressure over my chest. I was given my clothes and dressed myself slowly. I was anticipating pain with movement but felt none. I still took caution and care though.
11:30am At this point I was wide awake, pain free and fully coherent. I was sitting casually and texting away. Dr. Edelstein comes by and says "This is photo worthy... You don't look like someone who just had surgery!" I said "All I need is a tall blonde in my hand from Starbucks!!!" He tells me everything went smoothly and that I look great and did really well. We chatted while I wait for my ride home.
Stopped off at the main office to pick up my silicone sheets and the ladies were in shock. They couldn't believe how great I looked and that I managed to walk in on my own! Filled my prescriptions had a soup and feeling suddenly sleepy. Not sure if it's from the anesthesia or that I was up at 5:30am. Changed into my pjs propped up my pillows and was out like a light. I slept solid from 2-6pm undisturbed by pain.
Woke up and the discomfort seemed to be isolated to my ribs and below my breasts. Chest feels tight but not as swollen as I anticipated. Took my Arnica pills and sipped on lemon water. Lounged around, watched tv and read over post op care instructions.
My GF is staying with me tonight and I realize laughing causes pressure pain. The pain feels more like post workout pain like after smashing out a solid ab routine and doing lat pull downs. As the day progresses chest is beginning to feel tighter. Dr. E mentioned that there maybe more swelling in the next day or so. He says my skin and tissue is good and they don't sit up as high up as some do post surgery.
I've added a pic I took in the afternoon before my nap.
Feels like heartburn
Slept through the night but started to feel pain around 5am. Didn't bother with meds just found another sleeping position and bared with it.
Woke up at 8am and all anesthesia has finally worsen off. I was anticipating my pain factor to go up because of this but there wasn't much. It feels like I have bad heartburn. It feels good taking deep full breathes. It's weird but feels like a good stretch since the front of my chest feels so confined. My left shoulder is where I feel the most pain. Seems like the swelling is pressing up against a trigger point and creating an annoying radiating pain in and around my left shoulder and between my left shoulder blade. Sort of like carrying a cross body purse for too long that's too heavy. When I gently massage my shoulder it feels good. My right side is fine no issues there. My upper back feels overworked like from shovelling snow. (For those that live where it falls you'll know what I mean).
As far as medications just taking the antibiotics, Arnica and Bromelain, post op supplements and extra strength Tylenol when needed. I wash this all down with chlorophyll and water and have no issues with any of it upsetting my stomach. Haven't touched the OxyContin. Hoping I don't need too so nothing gets backed up lol. I started taking Milk Thistle to help with detoxing from the anesthesia.
By noon I was due for a nap. I'm amazed how deeply I can sleep. I guess when your body goes through such physical trauma it cries for healing time.
Physically I've been feeling pretty good. Not weak just moving more slowly. I manage to get up from bed without too much difficulty (here's a tip: engaging the abs takes a lot of the work away from using your arms). I can go about my day doing most things without difficulty. I try not to reach for anything overhead. I've brought down most of what I need (cups, glasses, plates, bowls etc.) and left them on my counter. Everything is within easy reach. If you have no children around the house my tip is to keep all your medication and supplement bottles loosely capped. It saves you from exerting your pec muscles. You'd be surprised how such a small movement can cause pain. Using the soap dispenser is sore :-(
I'm excited to see my boobies tomorrow. I haven't removed my bra or tensor since surgery. I've seen many members taking pics with it off ASAP and in cute bandinis but I think I'll wait until after I'm cleaned up. According to my post op instructions the Vaseline gauze that's placed over the incisions stay on until shower day. The sterile strips are left over the incisions. I'm going to be a good girl and follow protocol lol ;-)
Rumble in the Bronx or breast????
This morning I woke up in pain. My whole upper body. The anesthesia has officially wore off. Couldn't get out of bed, my right lower ribs were screaming. Felt like a thousand pound weight was on me and something sharp was jabbing in my side. My collar bone area, sternum, side ribs and lats feel tender and bruised. My boobs feel super tight and hard and slightly warm to the touch.
Lots of swelling has set in and my body is making all sorts of noises! My lower abdominal is gurgling and my upper right breast (near the underarm) rumbling and is squishing when I making circular motions with my hands.
Finally got to shower. Fees really good to remove the bra and tensor. That alone was such a nice relief. I was beginning to feel itchy and couldn't wait to get everything off. I removed the gauze and surprised to see no bruising or redness. Just the steri strips over my incisions. Everything looks good so far. I did manage to wash my hair and took my time drying it too. The blow dryer seems heavier than usual. My left pec muscle started to cramp up. I put some light make up on and took my dog out for a short walk. It feels good to be outside and take in some fresh air. It was nice to look more put together after lounging for 2 days.
Here are some pics of me after the shower. Wow am I ever bloated. "Aunt Flow" is about to pay a visit in the next few days but I never thought I'd get this much bloating. I was told with gravity, a lot of the swelling and fluid flows down into the abdominal area causing the bloat. I changed into my Hanes sports bra which feels great on. My right incision area seems to be the most sensitive.
I think I'm in the "Frankenboob" stage. They look very square and compressed. Did I think I would have more projection? Honestly they look small to me. I don't feel like I have 375cc. Uh oh....Should I have gone 400cc???? I keep hearing everyone say their boobs were enormous when they first looked down at their chest and I don't notice a huge difference and they don't sit as high as most other members. I know everyone recovers differently and I shouldn't be caught up at this stage. It's still super early and many changes will take place in the next few weeks and months.
I feel the intense pain reached it's peak yesterday. Feeling almost pain free today. I also feel a huge lift off my chest. There's still some tightness but the actual heavy feeling and constriction has diminished significantly. With this in mind I also noticed that my boobs don't feel or look so compressed to my chest. I can feel the muscle and skin finally letting go. This has taken a lot of my initial anxiety away about choosing the right cc amount. Out of surgery I placed my hands over my boobs and was like "what the ???? I don't feel any BIG change at all. Did I just under all this for nothing....." But now I'm more at ease.
My low back is a bit stiff today. I changed my sleeping position to upright. Practically sitting to help with drainage. I was also afraid to repeat yesterdays pain episode. I ended laying on my back halfway through the night. Don't know if it made much difference.
Muscle spasm is left shoulder has stopped. The only thing now is this tingling, electric feeling in and out towards the nipples. Otherwise discomfort has settled down dramatically. Confident it gets better from this point forward.
Anxiety has gone
When I came to from my anesthesia, the first thing I did was feel my chest and was so disappointed in the how small they felt in my hands! When I looked at myself in the surgical bra it was loose. I didn't even fill it out. I thought I'd be exploding out of it or at least hoped so. When I showered 2 days after I felt very anxious that maybe I should have gone 400cc not 375cc. My boobs looked so compressed like I didn't even have surgery. I was afraid that I went through all this pain and spent money on something so insignificant. I was so swollen everywhere. I had "back fat" and looked 4 months pregnant with small boobs :-(
But I can see changes have already started to take place from Day 1. Swelling is slowly going down finally and the boobs are rounding out slightly.
It may not be big changes in pics but physically I feel it. I'm posting pics of me post op and currently as well as with the Hanes bandini and soft bra.
Can it be true? No " morning boob" today?
Today is the first morning without muscle spasm in my left pec. Or rib zingers underneath my incision site. What a relief. I've been anticipating the discomfort every morning the past week around 4am. Such a nuisance because I just want to massage the area to release the muscle but afraid it may cause too much activity to the implant pocket.
I can lift both arms above my head without pain and I can lay on my sides and it feels okay. I don't stay too long in this position before returning on my back because the tingly, stretchy feeling starts to set in along the sides of my boobs. Again don't want to displace the implants.
My post op instructions says no massage and that my surgeon generally doesn't assign massages at all unless he feels it's indicated. I will know for sure after I see him for my post op follow up next week.
Lounging and staying indoors. It's cold and snowing outside.
Pics of me in my sports bra and Old Navy tank.
Anyone else feel tender along the ribs just below the implants?
Back to work as of Friday and taking it easy. I can manage 4-5 Swedish massages (light to moderate pressure) and luckily I've only had one Deep Tissue massage. I find when I exert pressure I get pain around the lower ribs and incision area. Still can't use pecs much. I don't feel weak but more discomfort underneath my boobs. It alternates bewteen right and left side, thankfully not both at the same time. The area is also tender to touch, feels like a bruise. Rubbing it feels good but I'm not directly touching the incisions. I'm still in steri-strips. Top of boobs feel normal, nipples are still ultra sensitive and there's tingly/numbness just below the nipples to the crease.
I'm not sure if this is nerves repairing or stretching during the healing process. The tenderness is not so much directly on the incisions but feels deeper like internally. PS says that although I may feel really good and almost 100%. The area is still pretty raw and it takes time because you're cutting away muscle and fascia when creating the pocket.
Visually not much has changed, it's more physical so no new pics yet.
3 weeks post pics
Back to work this week and taking it slow. They are starting to feel apart of me not foreign objects.
Not much change at this point. I think the left is starting to settle slightly. Still tender around incisions. Zingers on and off. The left crease hurts more than the right. Looks like I may have a small Mondors cord developing under my left crease. Just found it yesterday. It's hard to see in pics but I can feel it when I run my finger across the most tender area. I'll try and post a better pic when my steri strips come off.
Can't hide 'em
Back at the gym last Friday. Was feeling self conscious and shy to show off the new additions. I work out at regular times and so do a few other people in my building. So for the first little while I kept my zippy on. Didn't want to be too obvious.
Started with a half hour run and the boobs felt weird. Like solid round mounds on top my chest. Then did a series of leg exercises without weights. No barbells no sandbags. Felt good to move and get the heart pumping again. Otherwise no issues.
Couldn't handle the heat build up so removed my zippy.... Like wow they sit high!!! Definitely had a few looks. Obvious??? Maybe but no one stared enough to make me uncomfortable. Whew...
Second day a fellow gym buddy came over while I was on the stair mill and asked where I was. She took one look at me and squeaked "OMG you did it!!! You look amazing. Great size!" I chuckled and asked if it was too obvious. She said "they fit you perfectly and very well packaged now, people in the building will be in for a surprise come summer!"
Ahhh well there goes being inconspicuous. I'm okay so far. Just need to get use to them in active wear since they are more noticeable.
1 month post op
At the 1 month mark all pain is gone. No zingers. Numbness is fading but nipples remain uber sensitive. My steri strips have come off and I'm using scar gel daily on my incisions. They are still tender if I apply pressure to them and can feel the deeper sutures. After meeting my PS I was told the deep rib pain is from the sutures when he closed up the pocket. He makes a very firm and deep stitch to prevent implants from dropping too low especially in smaller framed patients. The sutures and tenderness along with my Mondors chord will subside over the next few months.
My first week back at the gym has been good. The legs are feeling the burn as well as my abs!!! Ab exercises have been more challenging than usual. I'm curious if the added weight (though minimal) of the implants on the upper body has anything to do with it hmmmm...
Will start upper body exercises next week using light weights. No chest work yet. Back and shoulders only. Losing some definition and need to build up the strength again.
Energy levels have been random. Being physically off has set my eating regime off kilter and the cold weather has induced carb cravings. Ahhhh all excuses I know. My mind set will get better once I can incorporate full body exercises again :-)
At the moment I'm getting more comfortable in gym wear. But may need to get a new sports bra... The current one seems to allow the "girls" to escape too much during plyos haha!!!
Tried on some swim wear tops. I think I can wear most of them. May have to be selective as to where is most appropriate since there is a lot more to expose now. Looking forward to bikini shopping this summer though!
3 months post bra size 32DD
12 Apr 2014
3 months post
It's been 3 months since my last update and everything is going well. No pain, full range of motion and back to full workouts with no restrictions. The right breast has finally dropped, matching the left and they are feeling squishy and soft on the top and sides. Still firm below the nipple and underside. I'm not sure how much they will continue to soften. If they do or don't I'm fine either way. Scars has soften and slowly beginning to lighten. Still use the scar gel and silicone sheets daily and apply lots of moisturizer. I've seen others with post surgery stretch marks and I'm fortunate that my skin is resilient and have not developed any. I am grateful to be blessed with good genes ;-)
Went to VS to shop for an everyday bra and sports bra. I started off as a 32B and my post op bra was a 34C so I grabbed a few styles I liked and was curious how I'd fit into them now. FYI, once you have implants your breasts will sit much differently in bras. What you thought looked good on you may no longer be the case. Try every style if you can. All those super duper push up bras are a no go for me it felt like a foam pad sitting on top my breasts. Maybe my boobs aren't squishy enough yet or maybe silicone implants just don't mould as well as saline??? After much struggle I finally asked to be fitted and I followed the attendants suggestions on which bras will fit my shape best. She said I'm really a 30 width band... I always thought I was a 34 but training has gotten me leaner so I'm not surprised. VS doesn't carry 30 width bands so I now wear a 32DD and bought their newest T-Shirt bra and VSX sports bra. Both look great and comfortable to wear. I also picked up 2 bras from La Vie En Rose. On sale 2 for $30 with matching panties what a steal! Unfortunately they don't carry 32 band widths so I wear a 34C at the tightest closure and it's not too bad.
I'm no longer self conscious with the new additions in workout wear. I've gotten use to them but do catch a "non-regular" taking more than a few glances. Not as much at the gym but definitely in yoga class. Most of the attendees at my studio are slim and have a very willowy frame. I'm okay with it but if I had gone any bigger I don't think I have the personality to carry off the size or the attention.
I'm really happy with how they look and can dress them up or down. I'm glad I chose 375CC I feel they fit my frame perfectly. Just enough profile, lift and side boobage ;-) But I have struggled with dress shopping a few times. Buyer beware. Going bigger up top and still being a small frame woman has it's disadvantages. I found I'd fit the dress perfectly on the body except the chest area was too snug or the "girls" looked compressed. Going up a size fit the "girls" nicely but then the rest of the dress looked boxy or was too loose. So just a heads up if you decide to get implants in the larger range.
Recent scar pics and new bras
12 Apr 2014
3 months post
If you recall my previous pics there was a lot of gapping when I wore my push up bra. Now I can fill my new bras out and none are push up or padded. Ahhh finally!