Oy, what a mental process this has become! Let's...
Oy, what a mental process this has become! Let's start from the beginning...
At 23, I decided I was ready to get a BA. I found a doctor that I liked and trusted and scheduled my BA. What drew me to him was that he was a pioneer and very proficient in using the TUBA incision. I had a great experience and got exactly what I asked for. Over the years, I grew out of my 23 yr old "teenage-ish" body into my adult body, so I gained a lean/healthy 15 lbs. With that extra weight and overall body size, my boobs grew as well. Pre-op I was a large A, small B. Right after surgery (390 cc, smooth, round, HP , saline, overs) I was a large C, which was perfect. After I "grew up" I ended up a DD. Not what I signed up for...
Fast forward 12+ years, and all I see is BOOB! I'm blissfully married to the most amazing man. He loves what I currently have and is 110% supportive of what I end up choosing. I initially wanted a downsize with a lift. I made a consult appointment with a great surgeon for an exchange and lift. He discussed everything, was on board with the downsizing and suggested a full (anchor) lift and I was on board as well! I scheduled the surgery for December 3rd and felt great!
These past couple of weeks, I did A LOT of soul searching and started considering an explant with a lift instead of an exchange. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how much of a burden these boobs are for me. I remember thinking how much fun I would have with big boobs and all the great clothing I could buy with them. Well, the complete opposite happened. These things are harder to deal with than small boobs! I'm fairly small, yet athletic, 5' 5", 130 lbs. I am a health/fitness coach and I also teach a group fitness class. It isn't easy working out with these. Tops don't fit well because I have to buy bigger than I actually am. Bathing suits are impossible for me because I fear I'm going to pop out, or I have to get a top so covering, I look ridiculous. My boobs just don't match my body anymore.
So, tomorrow I head back to my surgeon to have a second consult discussing the explant. I'm keeping my surgery date because these babies are coming out. I've been so blessed to have had NO issues with my implants. But I feel like a ticking time bomb. And in the past few years I've become VERY conscious of eating organically and avoiding toxins, so doing an implant exchange seems incongruent with my life. I don't know what I would do if I got new, smaller implants and ended up having a problem down the road. The guilt would eat me up.
If anyone has a similar experience, please don't hesitate to chime in and let me know what I'm in for. I have read SO many stories on here and it has helped me immensely! So THANK YOU to all the other brave women who have already, unknowingly, helped me feel like I'm not alone! Stay tuned for what I learn tomorrow.
DEFINITELY going with explant and lift!
I had my second consult with my surgeon today and I am definitely ready to go with the explant and breast lift. My doc is truly amazing. He listend to why I had a change of heart and was completely supportive. He said he has patients come in that can't ever seem to make up their mind and he suggests they hold off on doing anything until they're sure. He's even had women in my same situation and had them come back a year later after explant and want to go bigger again. He was very confident in my reasonings that I wouldn't be one of those patients. He put my mind at ease and showed me a great before/after that would be most similar to myself. What a relief! Her results were beautiful. Small, real boobs can be gorgeous!
While I know I will have a mental adjustment period as I get used to having much smaller boobs again, I am preparing for the future and putting my health as a priority over my vanity. I cannot bear the thought of doing an implant exchange and having something go wrong. That would tear me up inside. And while I trust the science that implants today are safer than they've ever been, there is no 100% guarantee that I won't have any issues with them. And with my lifestyle of being so aware of what I put into my body, new implants don't seem to fit who I am now.
It'll be a relief to never have to worry about them rupturing or needing to be replaced again. I can focus on keeping myself as healthy as I possibly can be. I've got a lot of life left to live and I intend to do myself as many favors as I can. And today, I'm starting with this.
Clarity from a dream
I had an amazing dream last night. I dreamt that I had my explant/lift surgery and I was beyond thrilled with the results! I felt beautiful, free, and like ME again. What a relief it was to wake up from that.
I've been daydreaming and online window shopping for new bras for after my surgery. It'll be so nice to not have to go into VS and hunt for a 32DD that is still a bit snug. I actually measured myself yesterday and was shocked at my bust measurements. I should technically wear a 32DDD or 32E. When I told my husband that, he stopped dead in his tracks. Even he had no idea that I measured that big. It felt awful to read that tape measure.
When I first decided on a lift I was originally disgusted at the thought of so many scars on my breasts (I'm getting a full anchor lift) but now, that doesn't even phase me. I'm actually looking forward to it because that is what will reshape my breasts into smaller, prettier boobs. I'm not looking forward to waiting for the scars to settle down but I can guarantee that I will be 100% diligent with scar treatment.
Today is starting off as a great mental boob day. 31 days and counting until my surgery!!!
Is the grass always greener?
As I continue to look for before/after boob "twins" (which I KNOW is impossible, but that doesn't stop any of us from looking, now does it?!?!), I have found myself looking at before/after of first time BA's. Some of these women have BEAUTIFUL small/perky boobs and they chose to augment them. I'm certainly no hypocrite, but I found myself silently screaming at these pictures! I can TOTALLY relate to wanting bigger boobs. Hello! I'm here because I chose to be here. But even before my BA, if I had boobs like some of these before pics I've been seeing, I would have NEVER considered it. I know this is more of a "If I knew then what I know now..." kind of thinking, but still!
I know plenty of women who have gotten their BA's and are thrilled. A friend of mine told me I was CRAZY for even considering to downsize, which was my original plan. She said I'd regret it. Wait until she finds out that I'm simply getting rid of them! I'm sure I'll get an ear full from her then. She LOVES hers, and she should. They look amazing, but that works for her, this works for me.
I'll keep looking for my boob twin, she might still be out there! But more than anything, I'm really enjoying all the explant stories I've been reading on here. It's proving to be a real life saver.
Daydreaming in Target...
Ah, Target, my happy place! I am lucky to have a Super Target less than 5 min from my house SCORE!). I stopped in today to grab a few things and I couldn't help but swing through the underwear and workout clothes so I could daydream. I cannot wait to be able to buy items from that store again! Cute, normal bras? YES! Fun sports bras that don't require hooks, underwire or an act of God to get on/off because of how tight they're designed to be to keep these boobs from giving me a black eye when I teach my PiYo class? YES PLEASE!!!
I distinctly remember going through the same process (just opposite) before my BA. Man, I couldn't wait to be able to buy a bra that was a C cup. HA! If only... Target doesn't carry 32DDD bras... I remember thinking how great I would look in tops/dresses because I could FINALLY fill them out. Double HA! (Although, I will admit, in certain items, they look AMAZING.) It's the day to day stuff that I never thought about. I was 23 when I got them, and looking cute in club/going out clothes was all I could imagine. I never thought about being happily married, and wearing "boring" clothes every day that don't lend themselves well to bigger boobs. And while I still love the LOOK of augmented boobs, they just don't translate well into MY daily life. While I have no issues with mine, and they are soft, they don't squish, so they tend to look more like half spheres on my chest than anything else. I hardly ever wear a normal bra because they're pushed up too high. So sports bras and non-underwire bras have become my go-to. So that compounded with time, I've sagged more than I ever thought I would. I'm ok with getting a full lift now because I'll no longer be pointing toward (thought not completely yet...) the ground, and my nipples will no longer be cross-eyed. I'm so ready to stop reaching into my shirt ALL day "squaring up" my boobs so I'm not cross-eyed. I don't mind people noticing I'm cold, but cold and cross-eyed? No thanks...
29 more days... Boy I wish it was tomorrow. I'm ready, I'm SO ready. I know there will be a slight grieving process, so I'm expecting that and preparing for it as much as I can. I know I'll have my moments of "Man, were they really SO bad?", and that's natural. It's totally normal to look back on something and only remember the good times. But thank goodness for this virtual journal so I can look back and remind myself of all the reasons why I need to do this. My future health is TOP priority. I got lucky with implants once (having had ZERO issues with them), will I be so lucky a second/third/forth time? I'm not willing to find out. And thank goodness for my husband. He has been the most amazing man to listen and be supportive along this journey. We even have a little song about them going away. A sense of humor is something I need throughout this process.
So stay strong ladies! If you've got a pair and love them, continue to love them. But if you're like me and ready to be done, embrace the new life you're about to have!
Clarity found today!
Today has been a great day! I had a friend of mine do a card reading for me. Think tarot cards but not creepy. She left me with a lot of lightening thoughts and a lot of clarity. She has a gift... It was a wonderful experience, even though I've never had anything like that done before. It was quite cathartic.
I've been diffusing lots of lavender oil for calmness and peace which definitely seem to be helping. I've had a few boob dreams and they've all been really positive! While I wish my surgery day was sooner, I will embrace the journey that I'm on while I wait. It's been such a huge help to share my story on here and find other women in the same boat.
Thank you all for sharing your stories and kind words with me. It's helping more than I ever thought it could.
15 more days!
I'm 15 days out from my explant and lift! This past weekend the hubby and I went away for the weekend to celebrate our anniversary. It was my last trip with these boobs! I'm SOOOOOO ready to have them out. I look forward to not looking bigger than I am because of these things on my chest. We had a great trip but I found myself not wanting many pictures taken of myself so I didn't have to see them.
I keep reading explant experiences on here and it helps me stay strong in knowing that this is what is best for me to do. I'm not excited about the recovery, but having such an amazing and supportive husband will be a big help. I know he'll have an adjustment period as well, but we're a team and knowing that I'll be healthy and mentally at peace will get us both through it.
So for now, I'm focusing on my pre-op appointment on Friday and thanksgiving next week. I have a lot to be thankful for and I intend to make the most of it!
God give me strength...
Well, here goes nothing. I decided to post my "before" pics, which I swore I would never do. The thought of my boobs on the web for all to see makes me nauseous but I have been helped so much from other women in the same boat I decided to pay it forward.
When I took these pics I had such a rush of different emotions. Sadness, anger, disappointment, embarrassment, shame, the whole gamete. I know beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but so is disgust. I haven't like the way they looked for some time now and these pics solidify that feeling. They're just hanging there, all sad and lifeless. While now I'm glad I didn't have them put under the muscle, this is what they end up looking like when that's what you choose! My areolas are stretched out and certainly not where they belong. Ugh... I absolutely HATE them! Hence why I'm having a full lift done at the same time.
God bless my husband, he loves them. He IS 110% supportive of me explanting and having a lift but he's been all over them lately knowing that they're going away soon. I don't blame him, he's only known me with them so this will be an adjustment for him as well. It's kind of like when you're about to go on a diet and and you have that final binge of junk food to get that last bit of satisfaction before you start. We both have a laugh about it and our humor does help keep this whole situation light.
I've got my pre-op appointment tomorrow when every little detail is discussed and I get my prescriptions for post surgery. December 3rd can't come soon enough!
So for all you ladies who are looking for advice and the strength to decide on an explant, I hope this post helps you. Posting these pics is HUGE (pun intended!) for me to do. Know that you are NOT alone in wanting them out. I'm so excited to just be ME.
Tomorrow is surgery day!
Well, tomorrow is the day I become ME again! Should be home by mid afternoon. I'm strangely calm so I'm hoping that feeling stays. I've done everything I needed to prepare myself so now it's up to God and my surgeon to do their thing.
My husband continues to be amazing and for that I am eternally grateful. Send me good vibes tomorrow, I'm so eager to finally be done with all of this!
Much love to all of you other ladies who have helped me along the way. You are all BEAUTIFUL!
3 Dec 2015
Day of treatment
Well call the papers, sound the alarm, and throw me a parade because those fake bags are out of my body!!!
Surgery went well (so they said!) but waking up was a little crappy, I was really sweaty. But thank goodness I did NOT get sick from the anesthesia!!! The anesthesiologist gave me some anti nausea meds in my IV and they worked. Such a blessing!
My doc told me that he would wrap me super tight and he wasn't lying. I don't have drains so I'll happily take the tight wrap. I go back in the morning to get the wrap changed and to make sure everything is ok. That'll be my first peak at them.
I even cried tears of joy and relief when I got home. Didn't see that coming! So now it's just time to rest up and heal. I'll post more tomorrow!!!!
Well, I got to take a quick peek at them today at my follow up appointment. They are beautiful! I cried some more in the doctor's office. And I'm NOT a crier! I am so thrilled. I can't even put it into words.
I'm still wrapped up tight which I really dislike but I understand the reason. I can shower tomorrow and loosen up the wrap a bit. I might have to loosen it just a bit tonight so I can sleep. I'm taking my pain meds along with my other prescriptions. Those at least take the edge off of the uncomfortable feeling of the wrap. Who would have thought that would be the worst part?!? I've been resting and walking around the house a bit. It feels good to move around but I get tired easily.
Thank you all for the kind words. This amazing forum has helped me more than I can say!
Swollen and bloated, yuck!
I knew days 2-4 would look and feel the worst, and I was right. My breasts are bruised, swollen, especially at the sides under my arms. Nothing scary, so no seromas, just normal swelling. My poor gut is bloated enough to make me look like I'm 30 weeks pregnant. I expected that too. The antibiotics and Vicodin do a number on your gut. I'm drinking a ton so now that I'm off the Vicodin I'm hoping that things get moving normally soon.
Took my second shower which felt great. Thank goodness my husband was able to wash my hair. And I'm very grateful for our large walk in shower with a seperate bench to sit on. That has been a life saver! I finally took off the damn wrap and I have 2 front close sports bras on. I just couldn't take the wrap any more. I felt like I was in a vice!
My left side crease scar seemed a little higher and puckered toward the center than it was 1 day post op. It could just be due to swelling so I'm not too worried about it. It's hard to say what they really look like because they've been squished so tight under the wrap. But all in all, I love them! They're starting to ache a bit which is normal but I'm going to stick to Tylenol.
I'm still resting as much as possible but also walking around the house a bit. Kind of sad I can't go to our favorite sports bar to watch football like we usually do, but other than that, things are great! I also slept better last night than I had the 2 previous nights. My neck gets stiff from staying in the same position but some gentle stretching when I wake loosens it right up. No pics yet, but I will get some soon.
Happy Sunday ladies!
Bruised but still beautiful!
At long last, here are my after pics! Granted, they look bigger in the pics than in person but I'm still thrilled with them. Funny enough, I don't even notice all the scars covered up by tape. All I see is ME! I feel so silly even being concerned at all with the scars when I first learned that I would need a full lift. My husband is beyond thrilled. I let him touch them a bit today and you would have thought he was a 5 year old on Christmas morning. Giggling and smiling like a fool. So it's nice to know he's happy too. And even though I can't get too close just yet, what a difference it is to hug my husband now. I can actually hug him, without those huge hard bags in the way. That feels amazing.
I strolled through Target again today (damn that awesome store!) and I stopped off in the bra section. I caught myself tearing up at the thought of all the cute little bralettes I'll be able to wear soon. Who would have thought that getting rid of my giant boobs would make me feel more like a girl?!?
I'm still sore but I'm trying to take it easy. My trip to Target was my first time driving since surgery 5 days ago. I went during the day to lesson the exposure to crazy traffic which was a good idea. All the walking around and pushing a cart wore me out but it was good to be back out into the world. I go back to my surgeon on Friday for another follow up. I foresee more joyful tears in that appointment.
My 2 Carefix post surgery bras arrived today (1is pictured). I love them both! SOOO much more comfortable than my cheap Walmart cotton bras. These new ones weren't cheap, but they are worth every penny. I got the "Bella" and the "Alice" models.
So again, thank you ladies for all your support. I don't know what I would have done without you all!
Funny times today!
Well, I got a wild hair up my rear end and decided to try on my old bras today. What a hoot that was! Only one kind of fits and only because it never really fit with my fake boobs. And while I was at it, I decided to measure myself my new bra size today. I measure at a 32C!!! I couldn't believe it! It only took me 13 years and $13K (total) to end up where I always wanted to be. I had a good laugh over it. But it was a whole lot of fun. It felt good to throw those giant boulder holders on the ground and out of my dresser.
I have my one week follow up tomorrow which should go swimmingly. I'm eager to see what my doc says. If I were him, I'd be pretty damn proud of my work. I'm also getting a hair cut tomorrow which I'm really looking forward to. It'll be nice to have my girl wash and dry my hair. I'm able to do it but it's still a tough to do right now. I might make my hubby take me out to dinner tomorrow night. No sense in wasting a good hair day, right?!?
Have a lovely day ladies!
Much less bruising, still achy
I had my one week post op appointment on Friday. Doc was very pleased with everything. I sounded like a rabid teenage fan meeting their favorite band because I kept gushing and raving about how happy I was. He even gave me a hug. I can't say enough about my doctor. Such an amazing talent he is!
I'm back to doing all my housework and normal shopping. Most of the bruising is gone but they're still achy which is normal. I seem to only be noticeably swollen under my arms. I can feel it when I put my arms down. The right side is worse, but I'm right handed. That leads to the dreaded side boob fat but I know that will go away in time as the swelling dissipates. My husband is still thrilled and is telling everyone we feel comfortable enough with to tell. That man makes it SO easy to be me!
I'm still wearing my Carefix post op bras the majority of the time. I've worn a stretchy bralette that I had from before but it isn't tight enough so I end up being achy from that. I'll likely go buy a couple of those today in the correct size so I can start wearing my normal clothes again. These post op bras are great but they're hard to wear with my normal clothes because of their shape. It's still ungodly warm here so I need to have bras so I can wear tank tops.
Tape is still solidly on the incisions which is great. They're already starting to tape a more natural shape. More of a teardrop shape which I expected. They looked evenly full throughout right after surgery, but that was the swelling. It isn't super easy to see in these pics, but it is happening slowly.
All in all, it's been a great first week!
Note to other explanters: DON'T overdo it during recovery!
Well, I'm learning, the painful way, to not overdo things during recovery. Just because you might feel well enough to do your daily activities, doesn't mean you should. I'm feeling nice and sore today which is a carryover from yesterday and Sunday. I chose to do A LOT on Sunday, and I shouldn't have. I went to Costo (nothing is small and light at Costco...), Super Target (I had a 20% store wide coupon that expired that day so I HAD to use it!), and did 4 loads of laundry in a two story house. So yeah, bad move. Compound that with more laundry on Monday, and cooking 2 meals, my chest was NOT happy with me. And to top it all off, I got accidentally elbowed in the side boob last night. Hell, even typing this isn't what I should be doing today.
I'm going to try and take it easy today, but I have a lot of office work to do. Thank goodness I work from home so I don't have to worry about looking presentable. But other than being achy sore from overdoing it, I feel great. I'm starting to get zingers in my boobs and I'm hoping that's more from healing than me being an idiot and doing too much. My sides (right under my arm pit) are still getting swollen, but I know that's from using my arms. My right side gets worse because that's my dominant hand.
I'm still thrilled with the results, and so is my husband. I've been getting a lot of "I love your little boobs." from him which warms my heart. He keeps telling me to ask for help in doing things, but he's busier than I am, so it seems silly to ask him to do more. He's already doing a lot. So, wish me luck as I attempt to take things easy today.
God help me stay OFF of Facebook!
Ok, first of all, I'm feeling fine. Still achy, mostly from a lot of tossing and turning last night and doing a lot of interrupted side sleeping. That seemed to put tension on my left breast T incision at the bottom, causing a TINY blood spot on my post op bra. No biggie, and no more side sleeping. And I'm hoping I'm not coming down with a cold or flu. I haven't been sick in 3 years! So I've diffusing oils, taking ACV, putting peroxide in my ears, and just started taking Umcka. Fingers crossed! I've been surrounded by sick people lately but I can't be sick for Christmas. We're hosting for about 12 people. YIKES!
Anywho, I joined a lovely FB group for women who are experiencing illness due to their implants. I joined to offer support to those who are considering explant. But I'm floored with all the women who are suffering illnesses that they attribute to their implants. I take them at their word that the implants are the problem. I'm fully aware of things being deemed safe to eventually find out the complete opposite. Because of this group and their purpose, they insist that women have either en bloc or complete capsulectomy. I totally understand their insistence on this but I have to admit that it's making me paranoid. I had ZERO issues with my implants, they were sub glandular and very soft (as soft as saline bags can be). My surgeon left the capsule in as he said it wasn't necessary to remove because of my situation. He did say that he would have removed them if I had issues or old or ruptured silicone implants. So I know he's not anti-capsulectomy. But reading all those stories from other women has me thinking I made a bad choice in not insisting that they be removed. You've got some surgeons saying that the body will absorb the capsule over time and others saying that it never goes away. WTF?!? I still love and completely trust my surgeon but stuff like this makes me HATE the internet. I just need to stay out of that group for a bit or only weigh in with supportive comments and not get sucked into thinking that I made a bad choice.
I know I'm not the only one who has experiences like this with over researching but I need to learn how to stop! Ok, rant over. I know in my heart I made the best decision for ME. I love my surgeon and I love my results. I just need to focus on being healthy for Christmas and continuing to not do too much while I recover. Thanks for listening ladies!
16 day post op pic updates
Not a whole lot has changed in their appearance, which makes me happy. I know they will still settle into their final shape. But the slow, gradual changes are nice. Only have had a small bit of incision weeping (barely a full drop over 2 days) on the left breast T incision at the bottom. That one isn't taped while the right one is. Not sure why. But I know the weeping came from side sleeping and using my arms too much. I've rectified that.
I'm trying to knock out what I assume is a mild cold. It hasn't gotten bad, but I attribute that to all the Shakeology, ACV, peroxide in my ears, Umcka, and my Wellness Season supplements. Hopefully it doesn't get any worse. But I still feel great. Husband has taken back over some of the house duties since I started back doing them too soon. He's such a saint! It's nice not having to do the dishes.
So now I'm going to get out of the house and enjoy the ONE cool day we'll be having in Florida this winter. Happy Saturday ladies!
Happy New Boob Year!
Well, I'm 4 weeks post explant. I'm feeling great. I finally don't have to wear a sports bra 24/7 but I still wear one most of the time because it feels better.
I decided to change out my incision tape but took pics before putting new tape on. My skin is sensitive so the redness is from pulling the old tape off. I think the incisions are healing nicely. They'll only get better with time. I'm not ready to wear an underwire bra yet, but I don't mind. I seem to have full range of motion in my arms again. I only fee restricted a bit because of the tape. I'm hoping I can keep tape on for 4 more weeks when I go back to my ps for another follow up. We'll see how that goes...
Most of my under arm swelling is gone. I can still feel it if I use my arms a lot but it's much better. I'm loving how my clothes fit now! Shopping is SOOO much easier with smaller boobs. I haven't done any real bra shopping yet and probably won't for a while. I'll stick with my bandinis and sports bras for now.
I hope you all have a fabulous new year. I'm stoked to no longer be burdened with those giant boobs!
6 weeks post op!
I'm 6 weeks post op and overall I feel great! Minus the mild cold I have that's making my head feel all stuffy. I took all the steri strips off a few days ago because they were either falling off or giving me a rash. My skin does not like adhesive of any kind. I still have some redness from the tape but it's slowly going away. I tried using silicone scar sheets on the incisions but that didn't seem to agree with my skin either. So, I've switched to a healing balm that is very soothing and it's all natural.
They keep getting softer and settling into their final shape. I'm very pleased with how they look and feel. Straight on, I barely notice any scars. The right side scars seem to be healing a little faster than the left. Totally normal, it would be silly to expect every incision to heal at the same rate. But it does make the right areola look bigger than the left. That's just extended redness from the further healing. I'm still getting random zingers but nothing too bad. I am finally able to workout again which is great! I can't wait to start teaching my class again.
I'm still wearing my post op bra most of the time at home. Wearing some of the other bras I have (all wireless) tend to bug me if I wear them for more than a couple of hours. I go back to my ps in 2 weeks for my final visit when he takes my after pics. But all in all, I'm still thrilled with my choice!
2 months post op and feeling fab!
I just had my 2 month post op appointment today and everything went well. My doc took my after pictures for my file and he was very pleased with how I'm healing. He gave me a scar treatment tip that is a little unconventional but I'm not opposed to it. He suggested getting a little bit of sun on my scars. I know, I know, everyone tells you to keep them out of the sun. But he mentioned how keloids are treated with radiation and since the sun is a source of radiation, in small doses, it can improve scars. And honestly, I think I've got scars that support his theory. Not sure where I could run around topless for a few minutes, but we'll see. I'll keep using Mederma and and my Lemongrass Healing Elements Balm because those are very soothing to my skin. I'll also keep wearing one of my surgical bras to sleep in because that's what is comfortable for me. I've been doing some light massage on them, mostly in the shower. I don't know if I need to, but I keep doing it. Partially, I just am enjoying the way they feel. It's been an adjustment learning my new geography! Everything is where it should be. No more reaching into my shirt to square things up or to simply lift them. Small boobs suit me so much better!
Overall, I feel amazing. My breasts are soft, they bounce and move the way real boobs are supposed to! I don't regret getting implants because it brought me to this place. What I have now is better than what I was born with, so for that I am forever grateful to Dr. Fakhre. I'm his biggest fan. I might be partial, but I feel that my results are better than ANY other explant/lift that I've ever seen. My husband is also thrilled with my results. They're like his shiny new toy!
I'm able to workout at close to 100% which feels great. Some yoga stretches that involve my arms over my head while bending back are a bit limited because the skin/incisions feel tight when I stretch but I expect that and it's already improving. Wearing clothes feel a MILLION times better. I can't wait to buy a bathing suit!
I can't say enough about how happy I am now. I don't think the breast lift procedure gets enough love or attention. That procedure is absolutely genius. I would have NEVER thought that I could be this happy with it but I'm ecstatic to be proven wrong. So for the ladies that are scared of a lift, don't be! Find a skilled surgeon who has results that you love and seriously consider it. It's a life changer.
My next appointment is in 4 months for my 6 month check up. I'm eager to see how much better everything can get in the next few months!
My boobs are famous!
13 Feb 2016
2 months post
Ok, maybe not famous, but it seems like they are! Not only did my after pics (from my 2 month post op appointment) make it to my surgeon's own website but I'm also being talked about on another review here on RS. There is a lovely girl who had her implants removed and had a lift and was left with results she wasn't expecting. I won't weigh in on it here other than to say I hope she finds some peace with it all. But to read a couple other members reference MY results and how great they were and to also suggest that she fly out to see my surgeon has left me speechless! While I wholeheartedly agree that my results are amazing, it's weird to hear others say it too. Never, in my entire life, have I ever been able to look at myself in the mirror without a top on and LOVE what I see, until now. Dr. Fakhre has become my boob angel. I will continue to sing his praises everywhere I go.
Anyway, back to my update. I went to VS the other day and decided to finally buy some real bras. I still love my bandinis and am wearing my post op bras to sleep in but it was time to get some normal bras. And to my absolute amazement, I fit best in a 32 D!!! I was laughing the whole time because I couldn't believe it. Real boobs fit SOOO different than fake ones. No more hoping I don't pop out of it if I bend over! That was the most fun I've had, EVER, shopping for bras. I was also able to buy a bathing suit in Target! It's been 13 years since I could buy a bottom AND a top in that store. I may have teared up a little...
My scars are still improving. I don't scar very well which is why I have some hypertrophic scarring. I finally have a scar treatment regimen that I like. I've been using silicone scar sheets at night (for at least 12 hours like suggested) then Mederma and Lemongrass Spa Healing Balm during the day. I started a gentle scar massage technique too when I use the healing balm since that's a little oily. I don't know what is making the biggest difference but some of the hypertrophic scar areas are starting to flatten out a bit. I'm hopeful that they will all flatten out in time. Funny enough, the vertical scar is the least visible scar of all. So when looking straight on, I hardly notice any scars!
Everything is still fabulous and I'm still beyond thrilled. My husband keeps catching me looking at them and smiling. He's never seen me so in love with what I see so he's definitely enjoying it. I feel so blessed to be where I am with it all, sometimes it doesn't feel real. But boy are they real!!!
3 months post op
Firstly, I feel fantastic! Secondly, I DO NOT SCAR WELL. So don't be scared of my scars and try to compare them with yours. My genetics has always left me with very slow healing and not so pretty scars. With that said, if my scars never got any better, I'd still be thrilled with my results. And they look more red in these pics than they are because I had just gotten out of the shower and was massaging them.
But speaking of scars, this is what I've been doing for them. I've been using ScarAway sheets at night, Mederma and Lemongrass Healing Balm in the morning. I've also been doing some scar massage. From the pictures here, I know it doesn't look like the scars are improving but they are, just VERY slowly. Thankfully the worst spots are on the outsides of each crease incision so unless I'm naked and looking in the mirror, I can't see them. From my vantage point, I see very little when looking down so I'm happy with that. God love my husband who says he doesn't notice them at all. The man is a saint!
If post op fluffing is real, I seem to have gotten some which is great! I have WAY more than I thought I'd end up with so that has been a huge unexpected blessing.
Everything is totally back to normal. I still get random zingers but not as often as I used to. I'm still sleeping in my post op bras because I'm a side sleeper and that puts tension on the crease scars and doesn't feel great yet. Who knows, maybe that's part of why those scars haven't healed as well as the other parts. I'm learning to be patient with myself and realize that I am so much better off now as ME, scars and all. They serve as a great reminder of the great choice I made to explant.
I do go back to my ps in 2 months so I'm hoping my scars look better by then. I don't want to give him a complex because I've got crappy scar genes.
So all in all, life is good with smaller boobs. I should have done this years ago.
16 Mar 2016
3 months post
Thanks to my "crappy" genetics, I am prone to hypertrophic scarring. You can see the progression of the hypertrophic scars if you flip through the pictures. Lucky me... my body decides to send MORE healing collagen to scars than it needs which causes the raised scars in some places.
I had an appointment with my dermatologist on Monday for something else and I had her look at my scars. They had become itchy, dry (if I didn't keep them lathered with healing balm) and a little painful. All typical of hypertrophic scars. Awesome... Anyway, she said that she wasn't alarmed by them but she gave me a rx for a silicone scar gel called Recedo. (I know, I know, it's silicone, but I had no breast implant illness and I don't have a reaction to silicone, so I chose to go for it.) The free sample she gave me to use until my rx was filled has already seemed to calm down the scars a bit. They seem less red, more white/pink now and they're less itchy. She told me that it would still take a LOOOOONG time to get better, but I'm ok with that.
So, I've stopped using the silicone scar sheets. They were ok, but seemed to dry out the scars which is something they're not supposed to do. And I've stopped using Mederma and the healing balm. I'm supposed to keep the Recedo gel on 24/7. It's a little sticky and takes a while to dry, but for now, I'm sticking with it. I'll update with pictures in a week or so to show the difference.
Happy healing ladies!
4.5 months post op
21 Apr 2016
4 months post
4.5 months post op and I feel AMAZING! I'm still thrilled beyond explanation with my results. Truly, truly in love with them. As far as my scars, well, they're still a little angry. Again, I am predisposed to scarring poorly with hypertrophic scars. My scars are NOT a reflection on my surgeon, they're a reflection of bad genetics. Anyway, as is usual with hypertrophic scars, they can be itchy and painful at times. I am fully aware that it will take a LONG time for these scars to calm down but the itchiness started getting on my nerves. So I just received a steroid ointment to hopefully calm them down a bit. There's only one part that is aggravating me (the outside of the left crease incision) but I'm putting the new ointment on each crease incision. If it helps the swelling or redness at all, I'll be pleased. If not, I'll just keep being patient and waiting for the scars to calm down on their own. If I REALLY get desperate for some itch/pain relief, I'll go back to my dermatologist and have some intralesional steroid injections which I KNOW flatten out the scars. But those sting like a $&@?! so I'll keep that as a last resort.
I'll update with more scar pics on another time. I took some just now but they look worse in pics than they really are because they were more red and shiny from just getting out of the shower and putting the ointment on.
Overall, I'm still speechless at how happy I am with how my breasts look. My husband is still thrilled and clothes fit SOO much better for me. I wouldn't have changed this decision for anything. It's great to feel like ME again.
5 month post op and more scar updates!
I still feel fantastic. Breasts are super soft, they move and bounce, I'm just thrilled. My scars are still stubborn, but I think I might be turning a corner with them.
As is usual with hypertrophic scars, they can itch and be a bit painful. It started to get on my nerves so I got an rx for a steroid ointment to calm them down a bit. They can also continue to "mature" for months or even a year. I'm HOPING that they've stopped growing and will start to get better. It's rather difficult to properly show them and their true color in pictures but in general, they ARE less red than they've been in the past 6 weeks. I've been using the steroid ointment (betamethasone dipropionate) for almost 2 weeks and it has kept the itchiness at bay. So for that, I'm very happy.
I've seen SO many before/after pics of explants with a full lift and the more I see, the happier I am with my results. I've noticed that my crease scars are longer than most others but the other after pics I've seen with shorter scars don't seem to have as much of a "lift". Now, this isn't to say that these others are being done wrong, just that I'm happy to have been given the longer scar to be given a higher lift. Not having any boob touching my rib cage under my breast is one of the biggest things I've been enjoying. I had a lot of sag and therefore a lot of boob/rib cage touching and I HATED it. I couldn't go without a bra, ever. Now, I go bra less at home as much as possible. It's still not as often as I'd like because of the steroid ointment I'm still using, but when I can, it feels amazing! So because of that, I'll take my stubborn scars over any other result that I could have been given by a different surgeon. I know my scars won't always be an issue like they are now, so I look forward to that.
I'm continuing to learn to NOT stress over my poor scarring. I believe that every situation teaches us something and this is teaching me patience and how to love what I see in the mirror. I truly do love the way they look now. I never did before, even with implants. My husband continues to be amazing. He loves them and still isn't bothered by my scars. The man is a saint. It's a blessing to where I'm at in life. And the scars serve as an important reminder of my journey. It's one I wouldn't change for anything.
6 month post op and things are improving!
I can't believe it's been 6 months. These pretty little things still have that "new car smell". I am still thrilled beyond belief with how pretty they are. My doc is a genius. And let me just take a sec to brag about him. I know there are MANY amazing and qualified surgeons out there. However, finding one that has treated me with such kindness, expertise, and availability was something I wasn't expecting. Dr. Fakhre has continually exceeded my expectations and I truly can't sing his praises enough. I had my 6 month post op appointment last week and he was so happy to hear how happy I am with everything. It's almost as if he's become a good friend. He is a blessing for sure!
Now, on to my scars. If you've been following along in my journey you know that my scars have been an interesting part of my healing. Bad genetics and being an extremely active person lead to the hypertrophic scars in the crease. They became itchy and annoying which is normal, so I finally bit the bullet and decided to go get the intralesional steroid injections in the crease scars only. Honestly, I made the appointment so that I could get some pain relief as the scars were still bothering me, their appearance didn't bother me anymore. So about 2.5 weeks ago I had my first round of injections. My dermatologist was so sweet and really wonderful through the procedure. I didn't count until I got home, but I did count at least 18 needle pricks. Yes, the injections hurt but it was very manageable. I expected them to hurt a lot worse. I was sore for a few hours afterwards but that subsided quickly. Within a few days the scars became less red, less painful, and the scar itself was much softer and pliable. I don't know how much difference is apparent in the pictures but trust me when I tell you, they ARE better in every way. I had the injections about a week before my appointment with my surgeon and even he was impressed with how much better they looked after one round of injections. He even took down my dermatologist's info in case he ever needs to refer another patient. Bottom line, I'm thrilled I did it and will go back for more. I don't know how many rounds I'll need (can only be done once a month) but I'll play it by ear. The temporary discomfort of the injections are SOO worth it.
I'm eager to see how much more improvements I'll get with my scars and my breasts in general. I'm pretty confident that the shape will maintain and that's definitely a good thing. Shopping for clothes has been so fun! I can buy bathing suits at Target (HOORAY!) and buy bras there too. I still tend to wear wireless bras because they're comfy and I'm still enjoying that I can.
Thank you for following along with me. It's been such a pleasure to share my story. Blessings!
7 month update!
11 Jul 2016
7 months post
I can't believe it's been 7 whole months. Kinda crazy to think about.
Everything continues to improve, especially because of the steroid injections. I posted a comparison between after one round of injections and after 2. I only posted 2 comparisons because I couldn't seem to get the angles/lighting right with other scar shots.
While it might not seem like HUGE improvements to you, I see and feel big changes. It's impossible to show on pics but the scars are continuing to soften and be less red. They're also getting flatter. The slowest improvement is the flattening. But I know that these injections are slow going with the improvements on the scar. Slow and steady wins the race, right? But the biggest improvement is in the pain relief which was my initial motivation. I wasn't able to sleep without a sports bra because it made my scars hurt. Now I can!!! I've reverted back to using silicone scar strips at night to keep slight pressure on them and I can sleep pain free. Rolling over from side to side used to hurt but not anymore! I can also go bra less during the day without pain. That alone has made the injections worth it in every way. I've got my third round of injections scheduled for next week.
I also bought some new scar "fading" serum (Body Merry Scar Gel). It's supposed to fade scars and I've been using it for about 3+ weeks. It says to use for 2 months before noticing any differences, so we'll see. If it doesn't fade the scar, no biggie, but I like how hydrated it keeps my scars and I like the ingredients. I wish it didn't leave a yellow residue on my skin, but it isn't a deal breaker. It's easier to wear under clothing than some of the other super hydrating balms I've used.
Other than that, everything else is the same. They feel great, they move and bounce, and overall look AMAZING! My other scars are still fabulous and barely noticeable. I've got ZERO regrets with it all and am loving the new real me.
9.5 months post op
17 Sep 2016
9 months post
Life is still great with small boobs! It keeps getting better every day. Especially with my scars. It seems to be impossible to get pictures that give an accurate showing of what they really look like now, but these are the best ones I could get. They look much better in person than I can capture on camera. It's been about 6 weeks since my 3rd round of kenalog injections. Those injections cause increased vascularity above and below the scar so that's part of the difficulty in getting good pictures. It takes a couple of months for my body to let that vascularity resolve but it does go away eventually. You can see the difference in the last pic. That side was always the best so I only got one round of injections so it's had plenty of time for the vascularity to go away.
All in all, my scars look and feel MUCH better. That's the best outcome I could ask for considering where I started with them. They're all flatter and softer and not anywhere near as painful as they used to be. I've been keeping them hydrated with rose hip seed oil when they're not taped and taped when I feel like taping them. I end up doing around 24 hours on and 24 hours off. They are the softest and flattest right after I take the tape off, which is to be expected. I'll probably do more injections, especially in the medial sections as they seem to be the most stubborn parts. I might still consider the laser treatments when I'm done with the injections but I need to get rid of the bulk first. I'm also massaging the heck out of them when they're not taped. I can still feel the collagen "breaking" in some parts. It's kinda fun.
But let's talk about bralettes! Those suckers are my new obsession. They are SOOO comfy and inexpensive compared to the kind of industrial strength bras I used to have to buy. It feels weird being able to buy small tops again. But I am loving every minute of it. Target and Aerie are where I got the 2 pictured. The grey one (Aerie) feels like pure awesomeness.
So that's pretty much it. I hope all of you have the same positive experience I've had with this entire process. Being all ME has proven to be so much better than expected. My confidence and self esteem are through the roof. I find myself topless around the house a heck of a lot more often than I ever used to. The hubby certainly isn't complaining.
1 YEAR UPDATE!!!
Holy moly, it's been whole year since my surgery. Sometimes it feels like yesterday and others it feels like eons ago. All in all, things are MUCH improved. This has become more of a scar update, since nothing has changed with the boobs themselves. They're still fabulous. :o)
As far as my scars, HUGE improvements with them to date! I've gone through 6 rounds of Kenalog injections (done at my dermatologist, who is also wonderful). I saw the most improvement after this last round, which was done a week ago. So these pics don't even show how much more they're going to improve once they settle down completely after this final round of injections. I did before/after comparisons in the pictures from when the scars looked their worst (before injections) and just now, after 6 rounds. Biggest improvement is that they don't hurt anymore!!!! If nothing else improved, that was all I wanted to accomplish. And I did. HOORAY!!! Secondly, they're all MUCH flatter and softer. The increased vascularity (above/below the scar itself) you see is from the injections. That WILL subside over time. So once that's gone, the scars will be even less noticeable. Considering where I started, I'm thrilled with how much they've improved. I rarely feel them pulling at all, and if I do, it's only when I'm in the middle of a full wheel pose in yoga class. And that's to be expected.
And yes, my vertical and areola scars still look amazing, so no update needed with those.
So for all of you ladies who don't scar well thanks to genetics or poor decisions during healing, there is hope. It takes time, so learning to be patient is something you're going to have to do. There isn't a quick fix with scars, no matter what path you take to improve them. But for me, I'm thrilled with what I've chosen to do. I'm still on the fence about the laser treatment to even out the skin tone of the scar to match my surrounding skin. I might still go for it, but I'm going to give my poor scars a break for a while. I've been treating them regularly for quite some time, so I'm ready for a break, and so are they. If I go that route, I'll be sure to post an update. I'm eager to see how much they continue to improve on their own.
That's all for now. It's been an amazing year back as my true self. It's a decision I haven't regretted for even a second.