I'm 3 days post-op, but wanted to start my review...
I'm 3 days post-op, but wanted to start my review from the beginning.
I always thought my chest was too small, but I never even for a second considered getting implants. Those were for fake girls who were obsessed with their appearance. I thought of myself as a low-key, natural girl. Sure, I barely fit an A-cup, but they were perky and cute.
Fast forward 15 years and 4 breastfed babies, and now they were even smaller. Thankfully I didn't have too much sagging, mostly because there wasn't much breast tissue to begin with. They were like the teeny tiny deflated water balloons. But they served me well as I always had plenty of milk.
The idea to have implants just randomly popped into my head in the fall of 2015, as I was moving some foam pads from my sports bra into my bikini. I realized I was being just as "fake" as having implants by wearing push-up bras (which I never filled up) and by putting pads in everything. I even put pads in my little lace bralettes.
I went to a couple consultations. Got financing and came sooo close to scheduling a date. That's when I found the stories of women who got sick with auto-immune diseases from their implants. I was horrified. I would never sacrifice my health for a fuller cup size. I said I was putting it off the table, I didn't even want to consider it.
Here's what I was working with before. I don't really have anything super negative to say. I loved having small boobs. I also loved having larger breasts when I was nursing. There are advantages and disadvantages to both.
I'm 5'6" 135lbs with a smaller frame. I carry my extra weight around my stomach.
The decision back to getting them
So it was fall 2015. I decided I was never considering implants because of the risk of health issues. But I still occasionally thought about them throughout that school year. I actually even went to a consultation that I had scheduled a while back. It was awful. A loud, arrogant Dr who talked about himself the entire time and completely dismissed the auto-immune illnesses I had read about as being crazy women.
Fast forward to summer of 2016. I'm not sure what exactly brought about the change. But the thought popped into my head: "my boobs are going to look pretty saggy and wrinkled when I'm 80 no matter what I do. Maybe I get implants and they make me sick and I immediately take them out. Maybe I get them and have 10 great years. What's a few scars?" And with that thought, I started researching Drs again.
Consultation with Potyondy
I had a lot of nerves before my consultation with Dr Potyondy. I think I recognized that if everything went right, I could actually be getting breast implants!
At the appointment, unlike other places I had been to, I never talked to an office consultant or a nurse first. Besides the office manager who walked me back to the room, the first person to walk in was the surgeon. I really appreciated that. He spent over 45mins answering my questions. Of course he said he doesn't believe they cause auto-immune diseases, but he wasn't dismissive of my concerns. He told me about a few explantations he had done, including one woman with implants from the 1970s! So I knew he had the skill in that area. And he said that he would take them out for me for any reason for an extremely low price, just to cover their costs.
He did a great job at answering all my questions regarding nursing if we had another child (you will be fine), push-ups(probably shouldn't do them but pull-ups are okay) and dirt-biking (you will likely be back on the bike in 4 weeks). The last thing he said to me, was that if I wanted to do it, I should talk to Jamie (his wife and office manager) and they could squeeze me in and schedule it for right away, because I seemed like the kind of person that would freak myself out if I waited a long time. This was actually really good advice.
Scheduled and calm
I got home from the consultation and spent a few hours thinking and praying about it. Then picked up the phone and scheduled my augmentation for a Friday only 8 days away!!
The oddest thing happened after I scheduled. Of course I was super excited and a little freaked out, but I also had this feeling of calm. As soon as it was on the calendar, I didn't have any major nagging doubts. As I prepared for the surgery by freezing meals, buying paper plates and cups, deep cleaning and organizing my kids rooms, I continued to read the worst possible boob-job horror stories. But I still had a sense of peace about it. Reading about botched jobs and illness just further convinced me that I wasn't going to mess around with issues if I experienced them. If they made me sick or caused pain, they were coming out. It was a huge help that my husband was fully supportive. I asked him how he would feel if I had them taken out before they were even paid for. And he said it wouldn't be ideal but we would do whatever we need to do. Also his mom and sisters (who I am very close with) were all super excited for me and supportive. This gave me peace of mind that I would have the support I needed no matter what the outcome. I knew all the worst things that could happen, and I decided it was worth the risk to have fuller breasts, even if it was just for a few years.
Pre-op and sizing
Size size size!!! It's what we all spend hours analyzing and agonizing over. It's why my iPhone is 50% filled with pics of boobs.
I went into this thinkimg I would get something in the 200ccs. My Dr recommended 300-375cc. This shocked me. After way too much time reading reviews and looking at pics on here, I decided I could do 300cc. My Dr loves ultra high profiles, but I wasn't so sure. I really didn't want the "two oranges fastened to my chest" look.
I went into pre-op with my husband and mother-in-law (she's not your average MIL thank the Lord). We spent a lot of time looking at sizes and trying them on under a sports bra. 300ccs looked MASSIVE to me, but I was told that some of it would be hidden under the muscle. Potyondy still recommended 350cc ultra high profile. But I wanted more of a Kate Hudson boob job. I finally settled on 300cc round high profiles under muscle. I was sure they would be way too big. They felt huge and heavy in my hand. I'm super glad my hubs and MIL were there because they convinced me over and over that they were not big. That gave me reassurance.
Surgery and first few days
I actually slept really great the night before surgery. My check-in time was 2pm with surgery at 3pm, so I was given the go ahead to eat and drink early in the morning provided I stopped by 6am. That was a blessing because I love to eat, haha. It was actually fine not eating meals all day, it was more hard to stop myself from
subconsciously putting food in my mouth. I actually did a couple times and remembered and spit it out. Other moms with small children might relate. ;)
I got there at 2pm, and ended up waiting for a few hours as they were running behind. I had been prescribed a Xanax but I didn't take it as I wasn't comfortable taking a new drug I had never tried right before surgery. And I wanted to go into it with my full wits, ala William Wallace. During the waiting time, I met my Dr Potyondy who did his markings, his Dad the anasthesiologist who was hilarious, and the nurse who was really down to earth and made me confident I was in good hands.
I did start getting nervous as I waited, but I sang hymns to myself and prayed as I walked around the room. When it was time to go back, I was feeling sober yet excited. Louis Sr joked around with me some more, and I got my happy drugs via IV. I don't even remember falling asleep, and then I was waking up on the table.
I drifted in and out on the drive home. Pain levels were pretty high. That first night I was able to sleep, but it was frustrating that I couldn't do anything for myself. Could just barely pee without help, but needed help getting in and out of bed and reaching for anything.
I took my Percocet and anti-nausea drugs the first day after. I had been scared of the Percocet cause even a half pill had made me sick when I was a teenager. So I started taking a half pill, but soon switch to a full pill cause the pain was so bad. I stopped the Percocet on the 2nd post-op
day because I didn't like how it made me
feel. Too foggy and my pee smelled weird and I just felt out of it. My husband said he thought I seemed depressed which just made me mad, haha.
Post Op day 3 and 4
I woke up on Post Op Day 3 feeling like a new person! Not sure if it was the anasthesia finally wearing off or getting off the Percocet and anti-nausea drugs or if it's just part of the normal recovery process. But I feel like I can do most things for myself now, like putting my hair in a ponytail, getting dressed, and doing dishes (carefully). Still trying to avoid lifting my 2 year old, but I've had to do it a couple times and it was fine. Just trying to keep my elbows close and use my legs as much as possible.
The new additions? I love them so much! I'm really surprised how good they look. No torpedo boob, no square tops, and they're not even that high. I could not be happier with the size, profile, and how my Dr placed them. They're not too far apart, and not too close together. And I'm super excited that I have full feeling in them and on my nipples! Only thing I don't like is there's a little too much upper fullness, but a few weeks or months will take care of that just fine.
No boob greed yet!! Will update if that changes.
Adding more day 4 pics and some before and afters.
My left breast is a little bigger, but it's always been that way. When I was nursing, it was often an entire cup size different, so a little asymmetry I can handle. I knew I didn't want different size implants, and my Dr didn't think I needed them either.
More before and afters
Before and afters in the same unlined sports bra
Recovery update and ramblings
Here I am at post op day 12 feeling surprisingly good! I don't think about my boobs constantly throughout the day like I did at first, probably because they don't hurt all throughout the day. My nipples are pretty sensitive, which they weren't the first week, so I'm assuming that's from the implants dropping. I'm still sleeping on my back, which I'm not a big fan of. If I roll over to my side, my breasts start aching. So back-sleeping it is, with the help of 6 pillows.
I have my very first post-op apptmt tomorrow, so I'm excited to hear what my Dr says. The right breast is definitely a lot softer and squishier, but maybe that's just because it's smaller. The left one has softened up a lot too, but it's a little firmer than the right.
I've started working out again. 3 mile walks, and lower body and abs stuff. Nothing at all that uses my chest muscles, nothing with jumping or bouncing.
Long rambling ahead!!! Before I had surgery, my husband gave me a pep talk. He said the process of shopping and getting implants to looking for a spouse and getting married. The essence of what he said is:
When you are looking for a spouse, you get to be super picky. Look at every fault and analyze every personality trait. Don't be fooled by lovey-dovey feelings, you really need to assess if this person is going to be a good fit with you. But then after marriage, you stop picking them apart. You have to make the choice to love that person in spite of their flaws and no matter what happens.
So it's the same with boobs. When you are looking at sizes, you spend way too much time analyzing boobs. And you should! You consider details about breasts that you never even thought about before. You go into your surgery with your wish list of the perfect boobs. But once that surgery is done, you have to stop the comparing. Get off RealSelf if you have to. You have to decide that you are going to love your breasts no matter what their flaws are.
That's not to say you should ignore capsular contracture or legitimate health issues of course. Just found that advice to be helpful for my mental sanity and wanted to share. :)
Would I have been happy if I had chosen 275cc? Yah, they'd be smaller but I probably would. What if I would have went for a mod + profile instead of high? Yah, I think I would. What if I had done what my surgeon suggested and went with 350cc ultra high? It would have been a slightly different look and I do question if I would have kept all sensation throughout the process like I did with the smaller implants, but I think I could be just as happy with those also. However I think that what I got is the perfect thing for me, because I've made to choice to believe that they are the perfect thing for me.
So let's stop dwelling on the "what ifs" and love ourselves as we are. Pretty ironic advice on a site for plastic surgery and from someone who just had implants put in, I know. But no matter how many improvements we have or haven't done to our bodies, it's my hope that we come to a place of acceptance with our bodies. For many years, I was inwardly judgmental of those that chose plastic surgery, but now I realize that choice is not as black and white as I used to think. Our reasons and motivations behind these decisions are deep and complicated and vary so much among women. Maybe you find that acceptance of yourself through surgery, maybe it's through the decision to not have surgery. Maybe it's through putting something into your body, maybe it's through taking something out. May God grant you the peace that you seek, however that may come about.
One more pic
We went to the Lucas Oil Pro Motocross Nationals on Saturday. First time taking my new body "out." I felt like I was getting slightly more male attention than usual. But surprisingly I never caught a single person looking at my chest. Maybe the male attention had more to do with the crowd demographic, hahaha.
It's funny because they feel so huge to me still. But looking at pictures, they are just average to small. Which is what I wanted. So I'm really happy that I got a size that feels big and ample to me, but that isn't drawing eyes towards my chest.
5 week update
Feeling good at 5 weeks! I often don't even notice them. I woke up yesterday sleeping on my stomach. Whoops. I haven't started working out again, besides a little bit here and there. I want to wait until 6 weeks before hitting it hard again.
I LOVE THEM. I really didn't expect to feel this way. It is so wonderful to wear clothes I couldn't wear before. The biggest example are those sporty short dresses with the shelf-bras. I can wear one without an extra strapless bra underneath! Feels so good to be braless.
One of my fears before surgery is that they would end up too big and make me look heavy or matronly. If you are concerned about this going into surgery, I would just say take a lot of time looking at pics and researching size. I am happy to report that I can wear all of my before clothes and basically look the same, but a little better. I And I don't have to wear hugely padded bras. I didn't want anyone to be able to tell I had it done. I can hide them, or play them up.
I've told my mom and sister, but not my Dad and brother. Most of my husband's immediate family knows, including the men. This doesn't bother me at all, as his family is awesome and hugely supportive. I have not told any of my friends. One of my best friends knew I was considering it last fall. I'm worried that she might ask me. If someone makes a comment that they look big, I'll just say "I've gained weight" which is true. But if I get asked directly, I can't think of any way around it. I'll have to tell. I'm just praying that this doesn't happen in a group setting with lots of people around. Most of our friends are pretty conservative, and I'm not sure that they would understand my decision.
I have not told my kids. I didn't even use the word "surgery" cause kids repeat everything! We used verbiage like "Mommy has a Dr apptmt" and "mommy still isn't feeling well after her Dr apptmt" and "you need to be big helpers for a while since mommy still is tired." But overall we have said very little. I'm very fortunate that my big kids really help out with the younger ones. My older daughter did all the diaper changes and baths on the 2 year old for the first week. I'm not walking around topless but I'm not hiding them either, so it's kinda weird that they haven't noticed anything, since they saw the full extent of my flatness beforehand more than anyone else. Kids can be surprisingly oblivious.
I take that back, my two year old knows. About 2 days after surgery she had a big fall, and I was holding her on the couch comforting her. And she started patting my breast and said "Have baby?" I said "No, I'm not having a baby." She thought for a little bit, rubbed and patted it some more and then said "That. That." As if to say, "well if you're not having a baby, then what's THAT?" My husband witnessed the whole thing and we were cracking up. Maybe it's her connection to nursing not so long ago, or maybe it's just because she's around me the most.
I do have an awareness that they are not permanent. It's not a cloud hanging over me or anything. I just know that they will be coming out someday. All good things must come to an end. I might re-implant, or I might go back to being mostly flat-chested again. Maybe I'll get 12 years out of these implants. Maybe I'll get capsular contracture next month and have to get them out (I likely won't re-implant if I get CC). Again, it's like a relationship, I just want to love and enjoy them as much as possible while I have them. "Better to have had boobs and lost, then to have never had boobs at all." Or something like that, haha.
You would think that someone like me who was freaked out about silicone illness would be all over the MRIs. But I've decided that as long as my breasts feel good and I feel good - no headaches, body pain or unexplained fatigue - I'm not going to schedule regular MRIs.