Well I've Taken the First Step!!! Sugarland, TX

Well - as my life is never just straightforward - we were supposed to Skype - but 15 minutes before, my computer decides to do a back up and was totally down when we were supposed to talk. So we talked on the phone - he suggests a reduction. EEEEEK I know this sounds TOTALLY ridiculous - that I am a 40 M, but I am SO nervous about some of my breast being taken away! I know that sounds dumb doesn't it? I hope you - whom have huge boobs - understand? I feel the same as when I had a hysterectomy 13 1/2 years ago. I was DEVESTATED thinking that I would be less of a woman, it ended up being the best decision of my life. But to get my brain into the mode was really hard. When I was wheeled into the operating room, I was crying and REALLY nervous. My surgeon said "Do you want to cancel this?" to which I replied "Yes, yes I do!"! He said "too bad this is for your health, you've suffered enough.." So the operation went ahead & it worked out totally fine. Due to the fact none of you know who I am, I can be more open with my feelings with you all! Weird hey? About 10 of my girlfriends, I have been friends with for 36+ years, they are ALL for me getting a reduction. But they all have normal boobs - like the biggest is a D! So they don't understand that personal connection one has to large boobs! When I went to a surgeon here - he talked about taking me down to a small C and taking off my nipple, and reconstruction - possibly with my labia - etc etc. I was HORRIFIED, cried all the way home and decided not to go ahead. Until I found Dr. Horndeski and his new procedure! Now I have to wrap my mind around having smaller breasts. He talked - like Royblue stated - in a engineering way, about working out the measurements compared to my body measurments etc. I almost started laughing - you can tell what was his first love! He asked what size I wanted to be - not what he would do! I told him I wanted to have the weight distrubuted better, and not be in pain, but also that my breasts actually look lovely not massacred! I quickly went to look at his pictures of reductions - as I've been focusing on lifts. They look the same as the lift - thank God! It is up to me when I get the surgery - I'm having reconstruction of my eyelid (from cancer) at the end of August, so will be MIA for awhile, so it might be sooner or a lot later! Now the nerves are setting in! It's been an emotional couple of days actually. 1. It's my 25th wedding anniversary tomorrow - weird feelings about that 2. I took a picture of my boobs - like I had to actually look at them from different positions - I've NEVER really looked at my boobs, they are either in a bra, or under a nightie. So to see these pendulous sacs just hanging there, then sending those pictures to someone else - it's REALLY daunting and upsetting! It's like revealing a deep secret - does that make sense? Other than my doctors, nurses and my husband, no one else has ever seen my breasts. The only time my husband saw them, was after he asked me to marry him - after 10 months of dating! I wanted to shock him before we made plans!! !LOL This isn't an easy decision is it? It's MAJOR surgery and it's deciding for someone to take something from you, that was yours for 50 years! I suppose that is the real issue for me. Even though my boobs are a pain - litterally and figuratively - they are mine and I am known by them. They have breast fed the 2 reasons I breathe & they make me feel and look like a woman! With ALL of the cancer surgeries and biopsies I have had - 60 to date! I feel like a punching bag, I have more scars and dents in my skin, than I care to acknowledge! My skin is in REALLY bad shape - and I usually have some sort of bandage either on my face or on my chest! At the end of August I will be having my eyelid removed - which is cancerous - and then having my eyelid reconstructed with another piece of skin from my body! It is REALLY daunting - to say the least! I have relied on the girls to take away stares to my face - yikes that's an unreal feeling to say that out loud! But it is the truth, they help me by just being there. Anyways, I'm giving myself a day to have this sink in then make arrangements and set dates etc. I would be interested in knowing how you guys feel - especially when you have been through this! Did you feel the same way? Do you regret going smaller? Any advice would be SO appreciated!

So I sent in my Realself inquiry, received a response from Dr. Horndeski's office within 2 hours. I was sent the paperwork to read over - what to do and expect etc. Then I sent off my pictures of the girls - with my sincere apologies for making him faint!!! LOL It's quite eye-opening and humbling to take pictures of your breasts (when they are covered none stop)! I was almost in tears at several points - especially trying to take pictures of them by myself (one of my girlfriends offered - but I still wanted to be friends with her so I said no!) I don't know how anyone takes selfies! Anyway it's done - now I have a Skype meeting with him tomorrow! I'm REALLY hoping this can be done - I have some rare health issues & I'm sure it's daunting for any doctor, but here's hoping! I NEED to help my girls and thus my back, neck, shoulders, be up where they belong! Not to mention my self esteem and going forward IF any other man shows up - which looking at the girls today, is NOT going to happen untill I get them they help they so desperately need. It's SO daunting to be 50, on the way to being divorced and having a body that has not been seen by someone else in 27 years! So I will update after the Skype!

When I was 13 I had fried eggs for breasts - I even stuffed my training bra! I used to cry myself to sleep & pray that God would give me some girls to hang around with - a bit of foreshadowing there! I was 14, went to bed with fried eggs, woke up with melons (my grade 9 nickname - oh what fun!) I think God became SO fed up about my crying, that he slapped me on the back & my shoulder blades came crashing through my front to form boobs!!! Thankyou Lord - just 1 complaint, could you have given them lift too? Did you have to make them into floor scrubbers?!

I was known as "Melons" - no that wasn't a joke! These female friends of mine have been part of my existance for 36 years. My soon to be "ex" husband, got used to the length of them. He became used to rolling over on them, in the middle of the night. I, however, could not - basically because we slept in separate rooms! Having 2 boys, didn't help the girls out either! I desperately tried to breast feed - but not being able to see them, I would put them on the floor and hope to God they found the nipple, as I sure in the hell couldn't tell ya! When I heard them almost drowing, I knew they were full! With my first boy - 22 years ago - the breast nurse even said "Perhaps we could whip up some sort of a pully system!!!!!!" As I was giving up on breast feeding! I replied "So you want me to shout to my husband - who is in the living room - "BACK HER UP" so he could start the motor to raise the hanging, pendulums?!" I tried again with my 2nd son - but I could never get the nipple in his mouth, plus he would turn blue from my entire breast encompassing his head and there was no airway! Yes you might laugh - but this is true!

Through weight gain, injury & being diagnosed with a rare condition etc. my poor girls took even more of a beating & look SO depressed! It's time to make them & myself smile! I've just turned 50 and asked my husband for a divorce - after 25 years of marriage! The thought of another man looking at my sad friends HORRIFIES me! To be able to feel & look better, have the girls back to where they were supposed to be, is worth EVERYTHING to me! Never mind going topless - as some of Dr. Horndeski's patients have stated! I haven't been topless since I was 2 years old!! To lay on my back with my arms by my side - instead of being spread eagle, would be sublime! To not look like a 100 year old woman - with the sheer weight of them alone - is worth the cost of the operation itself. Add on all the rest - to feel like a woman again, to wear sexy outfits etc. well that's just icing on the cake! To eventually meet someone that will not balk at the sheer size of my breasts - will help me deal with being with someone different for the first time in 27 years! So welcome aboard my journey - I will try to keep it lighthearted! You will know if I'm down or upset - as the lol's stop! ;-) I will update as soon as I learn more from the Dr.!