From Beauty to the Beast...well,precisely to the Pig! - Slovenia

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So here we ho again,I am twenty and I already had...

So here we ho again,I am twenty and I already had a boob job done,long time ago. I was just a kid not even 16 years old,and no,this wasn't just a whim,I basically had no boobs,and it was as terrible as you can imagine.
The surgery went just perfect and my life got better,let alone self esteem! I was now "complete" . I was doing pretty much of what a socialite does so everything was fine and I was really attractive.
Till I took poor decision and stuff and I ended up being diagnosed with bipolar too and other co-existing disorders. Mood swings,always unhappy,love/hate relation with myself etc.
Months ago I stopped taking picture of myself as I was unhappy with my nose. It just seemed too big, really no one ever told me so,it was just me.
I was in this mania phase (I am on Prozac and this stuff works wonders),every time I went to my doctors (psychologist and psychiatrist ) all we talked about was my nose,all the other problems were apparently gone. So they agreed with me having this freaking surgery done,just to re-gain that self-esteem that not even Prozac could completely give me. How can a pill cure you if you are just escaping from something you see in the mirror? I rushed everything,so I called my previous surgeon and booked an appointment, talked about fees (as a returning patient it was having a discount and to be honest I couldn't have afford anything more expensive than that) and made it.
The surgery itself went fine. It took 1h 40mins under general + local anesthesia and as they woke up I walked my self to my bed. No nausea,no headache,no discomfort at all,I just was bored while I was waiting to get back to the apartment I and bf rented (this clinic is not in the same country I live in).
I had literally no pain and enjoyed my stay so I was even walking around (wearing a burqa-like thing on my face lol) and doing stuff.
They removed tampons on the third day (open rhinoplasty) and nostrils were uneven but they told me it was too early to tell what the nose was going to look like . I simply looked like Christina Ricci in her "pig nose movie" Penelope. I just went all week with the bandage still covering my nostrils as they looked just wrong.
Yesterday I came back at the clinic to have sutures and cast removed,here starts the real nightmare...
I'm still pig swollen,bruised,my tip is too upturned and my nose too short (whoever asked for that??? I precisely said no drastic changes more and more times before the op.)
While having my final trip of the stay,yesterday, I still covered my ugly new nose with a bandage and let it alone. It would have scared people more it it wasn't covered...
Then me and my bf came back home,a trip that took 4h and he is the only one with the driving license so u can guess how tired he was ... I cried a river... How could I go back home and tell everyone I was unhappier than before?????
Once I arrived at home I tried to look closely in the mirror to examine the skin around nose (only god knows how oily my skin get during these days= pimples! ) and I almost faint : where previously there was clotted blood in left nostril,there was now a...gash! I screamed in fear and everyone went to see what happened. I covered this scary thing again with the bandage and went to bed,anxious and feeling garbage. I really am the designer of my own catastrophes.
Today my mom called the clinic and at first they said everything is normal,but then when I emailed them the pic I am attaching to this story,they said they want to see me immediately.
Tonight we are returning there with our car ,another 4h trip. I am seriously scared and can't help being angry to my own stupid silly self! Wish I had not done it!

Oh my.....Gash !

So today me,daddy,bf and a dear family friend came back to Slovenia.
When we arrived at the clinic,where we waited 1+ hour changing from one room to another and initially they said that everything was find there was just clotted blood....
They,in order to verify as I come from far away, put a solution on the crust inside the left nostril (where the gash was ) and waited for it to soften...
Tah-Dah! As I am not a visionary,the gash was there and they started taking photos of it,talking to each other in Slovenian,which obviously nor I nor who was with me could understand. I waited over and over again (the mediac team was performing 2boob jobs in the meantime ) and then the doctor ( to keep his name private -for now- lets identify him as the very owner of this clinic) came and he seemed really bothered n stated such thing never happened to them (yes....of course...) . He gave me local anesthesia ouch!!! and with his assistant started SEWING my nostrils,while my friend Jo was dearly holding my hand.
Nothing was put on my eyes so it was up to me keeping them closed while being sewed ...goddess...
When everything was over he told me to come back 11-11-2013 (so in two weeks) to have sutures removed and nose checked ...
No after-care instructions were still given,just " wear yellow concealer to cover bruises and take antibiotic twice a day per one week " ....!!!!!!!
I'm stressed out. I'm mad . I am afraid the whole story won't turn out no good.... The way to my healing is still long....and I just can't live imprisoned @ my house any longer... I want my life back and the path to it seems to be never-ending ... I will post a picture later,as I arrive at home. Thanks for all of you who reads me and thanks a million for your comments! Hugs.

Ps. If there is any error forgive me please,I'm writing while in the car on my way home!

No hair hanging,just stitches y'all!

I promised I would upload pics as soon as I arrived at home, but the truth is I am still crying . Whenever I look in the mirror (or camera ) the person i see is not me,nor someone I would have loved to be. So,here is just a snap of my nose seen by profile. No hair hanging ahah those are the new stitches ...

Before Photos

Since someone is asking for before photos,here we go.... Looking at them now make me feel stupid,as my nose was not nearly as bad as it is now! No drastic change was needed,a little corrections would have been enough,as I repeatedly said to surgeon...

Happy Halloween + 5yrs of us! I love you Michael it's 5 years since me and my (soon to be) hubby met. 5 years . 31-10-2008. I spent so much time imagining how to celebrate but now...I'm trapped @ home! This journey is so exausting ....

Happy Halloween everyone.

....Miss Pimgles....

How did y'all deal with the oily skin after the nose job??? I use to take good care of my skin and I am almost always pimples-free (tetracycline + benzoyl peroxide) but now with the swellings and bruising came the pimples . Since I wasn't given aftercare instructions could I do a face mask/scrub ? Can I use those "pores strips" on my nose? And how can I get rid of this gross oily skin? .... Sorry for all the questions but I really need your help! Besitos beauties

2 weeks post op!

So it's been 2 weeks since my surgery and 1 week since left nostril has been re-sewed.
Bruises are almost all gone,not the same for the pimples. My face is like that of a 13 years-old fighting acne...
The swelling has gone a bit A BIT and I mean a bit down and I'm starting to see the shape of right nostril; the left one has been re-sewed one week ago so it's still very swollen.
The tip is not so upturned anymore (or I should say I'm getting used to it) and I venture outside with really no problem. I put my make up on and leave the nose make up free n covered with the protective mask (whatever its name is) ,I really don't care people staring.
So if you have any question feel free to ask me by comments or by inboxing me. Besitos beauties

To pluck or not to pluck?

Hello y'all !
So it's time to update.
Well,my nose has a pimple (?) on the inside of right nostrils and a little red bump onto the left one,which for the record is still so different from the other...I hope it's due to the stitches still stuck in there...
A weird smelling is coming out of my nose,and no others can't perceive it,if you were wondering about that...
Now.its embarrassing but here's the question: I do have nose hair. How can I pull them out now that I've had this surgery done? Is it safe to pluck em all?? ...I'm dying of shame....

Stitches removed

Good evening good folk!
Yesterday I had my stitches removed. A round trip,so I spent in total 8 hrs in the car. I was hella sick.
The doctors removed my stitches and then they said to me not to stretch the skin or the cut in the left nostril could reopen (.............). Once the stitches were gone they sprayed me with a thing they call silver spray,advised me to wear the night protection for two more weeks and to come back in six month for a check up.
As many asked I'm posting front view pics. It should go without saying that I'm not happy with the result so far. And the scar is just BAD. I'm concerned it might turn out being a keloid....

Exactly ONE month after my nose job

... Wow... Time really does flying! Today,one month ago,I was having my nose literally destroyed.
Swelling is still there (there is even more swelling now on the tip part ) . My skin still looks like s#it , one week ago I went to a beauty salon as I subscribed some time ago for 10 tanning session combined with the collagen sunbed, whatever. As I stepped in the beautician looked at me like I was suffering from a weird disease and asked "WHATS WRONG WITH YOUR FACE?" ... I needed to tell myself not to cry right there... I never ever had such bad skin. Not even when I was 13.
However,the wrost part isn't even neither that of the pimpled whatsoever skin,nor the piggy meaty swelling... But... It is that the nostrils are still different shaped and as a month has gone I feel like I should have a revision. I look deformed, left nostril is higher and thinner than the right one (which I prefer,as it is lower) . I remember my friend Jo,right after they removed tampons (3 days post op) asking if nostrils were going to stay so different and everyone told her " we still can't know it's to early" , as I insisted the girl at the desk (she's so dumb n mean,like please you're not even a nurse,limit yourself in doing just your secretary job) told me " body is asymmetric itself so it's normal,one nostril will be different sized than the other . Same goes for boobs no? (-well,not like that-) " . I really don't know what to do,should I wait or should I start seeking a revision??? I'm desperate...

Typing errors in the previous update!

* time really does fly. And other typing errors... Forgive me!

Never ending nightmare : revision is needed

Hello folks!
I don't really know if someone's still interested in reading my story but I need to vent anyway.
It's been more than one month since my life-changing nose job,I was hoping it was all swelling but...
One nostril is still extremely different from the other,columella seems deviated and the tip is absolutely not defined ,especially on the left part ... It is so different.
No need to say I'm crying a freakin river every day.
I'm a kind of socialite as I already told you, and now my life is in stand-by. I can't accept to wast my time being so depressed,no more photos,no more parties. I look like I am deformed, incredible ... I paid for that! I can't stand this situation anymore,and I do not know how to proceed . Should I seek a revision yet? It should go without saying that I'm not returning to those butchers who ruined my face....

It's a vanity meltdown...

So here I am again.
I met a friend of mine today,due to a birth defect she has had 8 rhinoplasties done over the years,so she is quite an expert . She told me not to worry as this problem is just caused by the uneven swelling. I don't know what to think anymore...
I also sent an email @ surgeon and till now I received no reply. It's so frustrating,you know.

Nose is no good & don't judge

My fault I have made a mistake,writhing in the green space below ...and It seems like I can't delete what was supposed to be the title of this post and it's now wrote under the " my doctor " line.
Long story short,I'm still very swollen and "deformed" and you DO see it both by frontal and side view.
This surgery has put my life in stand-by ,as I'm doing a kind of life so much different than before more parties,no more photos,no more compliments... I'm vain,I know.
My skin turned out to be oily and I'm all goodness...
This being said,talking about the " mental " part,I'm not willing to tell my story right here (& I'm thinking of releasing a book about it),but ive tried therapy,pills it:tried! But really no medication can make you see a different YOU ,the "you" you always wanted to be,when looking in the mirror.
Not one but MANY therapist agreed on me having work done,since everything else failed. I hope you understand,I'm not willing to be like Valeria Lukyanova nor Justin Jedlica but I DO love beautifulness. I fought since my childhood and I'm now trying to reach my idea of beauty.
Once again,please don't judge and if you are wondering about something or simply want to get to know me,use the inbox :)
Thanks for your patience. Besitos

Problem breathing by right nostril

....I don't know if someone's still interested in my story,but I'll keep posting on here... Since I feel like venting!

So,almost two months have passed and NO improvement is seen .
-Functional problem: the right nostrils (larger one) keeps clogging so I'm stuck on ActiFed nasal decongestant spray.

-Into the nostrils,right across the septum you can feel two small "pimple-like" things,one per side,they are hard at touch and round as a pimple.

-Left nostril is dramatically different from the right one. And by left side nose is still sooooo upturned compared to te right side.

-Tip is HUGE. I've never ever seen such an huge nose tip. Not even the bulbous ones...

-Skin of the left nostrils is WAY thicker

-No scar improvement

The surgeon still hasn't replied to me. What can I do?

Returning to the clinic

I'm in a deeply down mood.
The left nostrils seems to restrict insted of enlarging ,but surprisingly it's the only one I can breathe from.
I argued with the clinic,as nor I am happy with the nose aesthetic nor I can properly breathe ,which I could do BEFORE surgery.
They said it's not their fault,and said I need to see a nose specialist (I can't spell the name properly).
Then they called me back and told me to go there this Sunday,after I sent them even more pictures.
I already had a doctor who told me that or the operation hasn't been performed in the right way,or that the result messed up.
Another 4 hours trip (and return) just before Christmas... I'm exhausted I shouldn't have had this op done.
Now,first of all I want to "fix" the aesthetic part,both with fillers or steroid shots ,then on Monday I will see the nose specialist for the breathing part.
There is no way I'm gonna let this surgeons operate my nose again! No freaking way. And if I do have a deviated septum (which is almost confirmed) I will have surgery here in Italy,in an hospital.
I honestly hope with all myself that there is just an issue with the turbinates,at least I don't have to have my nose broke again but I could consider laser treatments.
As for now,I'm hooked on nasal decongestant spray, long before my nose get used to it and it stops working? I'm currently using ActiFed,as corticosteroid-based spray Flixonase (which is supposed to be one of the strongest) doesn't work.
Think really well before you have your nose touched,and be selective with surgeons. Ask. Ask. Ask. Ask more than anything,ask any "what if after surgery" that concerns you. But,again,use fillers instead of invasive surgery if you can. Medicine evolves,who nose maybe one day rhinoplasty will be more easy to perform and the post-op less stressful to deal with...
I'm sadder than before I had my nose job.

Funny typing error

* who nose ahahahah it was supposed to be who knows... Lol
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