30, 5'3", 115lbs, 325cc MP+ Unders - Scottsdale, AZ

After years and years of wanting a BA, I finally have it scheduled! I'm insanely nervous and get on here nightly to review pictures and usually end up with a racey heartbeat and thinking I'm in over my head, but thanks to all the reviews I know it'll be worth it all in the end! 4 days to my pre-op.

I forgot to add pics to my first post so here are the sizer photos. The pink shirt is from my second consult. My phone was dead during my first consult so I couldn't take photos. At the first, I tried on 350cc only. At the second I went all the way to 325, 350, 375, and 400, which were SO heavy! I have a bad back as it is, scoliosis and reverse lordosis in my neck so as nice as they would have looked it probably would have been detrimental to my back to go that big. In the white cami I'm at my chosen PS office wearing 350cc. I'll be a tad smaller, he doesn't want to go over 325cc on me and they'll be under the muscle which will lessen the oomph a little. My pre-op is on Tuesday and I'm going to push for 350. I've read on here that it's only 3 tablespoons difference for 25cc but I've always been so small and so self conscious about my chest so I feel that for me, the bigger the better. This is a huge chunk of change that I already have some guilt spending on myself so I'd hate to end up smaller than I'm envisioning. I'd like a good full C, small D. I was a small B before my first pregnancy which shot me to a DD. Now I wear an A that gapes open. Not quite mentally "there" yet to post the sad girls yet, but I'll get there!

I had my pre-op today and was having a lot of anxiety all day yesterday and today. Mostly financial. It's a big chunk of savings to just poof be gone overnight. I was a late-teen mom and all I've done for 11 years is put my kids first so putting myself first on this feels so foreign and selfish. I need this though, for my self esteem issues and there's simply no other fix. In the exam room I was a little more apprehensive about the physical part of this but as soon as my PS walked in, I felt at ease which was my sign that I ready for this! We decided for sure on 325, but need a sizer for my left side (I think) to help with the asymmetry so that side may be a smaller implant. My ribs on that side protrude out a lot farther than the other side so I doubt they'll ever be perfectly symmetrical. Trying the 325 on again, I felt more comfortable with going that "small". It's really not that small, and does feel heavy to me. Hopefully they won't feel so heavy when they're under the muscle versus stuffed in a bra. I'm definitely excited now but I hope the next 24 days go by slow because this feels like it's come up on me so fast!