Hopefully Getting Sleeved in the UAE. Saudi Arabia, SA

I have been a fan of real self for a year and it has really helped me to go ahead with my decision to get a gastric sleeve. I initially was reluctant to write a review-however I haven't seen very many reviews done in the UAE and I thought I might help someone on a similar path to my own. First a little about me :D I'm 35 years old, Canadian, 5"9 and the mother of one adorable baby boy. I've been happily married for two years and I'm a teacher. I currently weigh 119.1kg (262.6lbs) ugh! I was always a stocky kid-tall 5"9 since I was 13 years old and strong. When I was young I was involved in ballet (until I was told I was too tall), martial arts, swimming, gymnastics, biking, hiking etc. when I hit puberty I started gaining weight, but I didn't really think about it. I already towered over most of the kids in my grade so getting a bit wider wasn't all that noticeable. By my twenties I had gone from about 175lbs to 208lbs and I started to freak out. I was barely eating anything! This was in the heyday of the Jarrod subway diet-I was eating one six inch veggie sub with no sauces and going to the gym 5 days a week-but my weight was still crawling up. Finally I went to a doctor who diagnosed a thyroid disfunction. At this point I was put on medication and my weight dropped by ten pounds. A visit to the dr Bernstein clinic helped me lose 60 more pounds over the next few months. Fast forward a few years and with the death of my father, coupled with my divorce, the weight started creeping up again. I fell into a very deep depression where I really didn't care about my future. I took comfort in food-sometimes not leaving the house for a week at a time-ordering pizza 5 days a week. I quit my job, stopped seeing friends or family and just kinda gave up. When I finally got treated for the depression my weight was up to 235 pounds. At the suggestion of my therapist, I decided to go traveling with a friend who is now my husband and my best friend. Unfortunately being happily married, living a comfortable life in Dubai didn't make the weight fall off-it only made me more happily fat! (This is the land of the all you can eat/drink all day all night buffets) And when I found out I was pregnant it was the first time that I had actually started to worry that my weight might affect my health or my baby's health. I stuck to a strict diet-not eating anything that might make me gain weight. I didn't gain any weight for the first two trimesters and was only 22 pounds heavier at nine months. I gave birth to a perfectly healthy boy and was at my pre-pregnancy weight (actually was about 8 pounds below) two weeks after getting home from the hospital. Then I stopped breastfeeding :( Creep creep creep my weight is higher now than it was at my nine months pregnant weight arrgh. This is why I decided it was time. I can't play with my son because I get tired, my back hurts, my hips hurt, I can't carry him for very long, I can't play on the floor with him or my knees hurt. I want to be healthy for him! I don't want him to be the kid with the fat mom, or be embarrassed by me (more than the times I purposefully embarrass him when he's teenager ;D). I met with my surgeon today to discuss the timeline, procedure, diet restrictions etc. he seemed like a very experienced doctor who was familiar with my feelings of guilt, shame and fear. He was reassuring and showed me the before and after pictures of some of his other patients. I left feeling a little nervous but excited to begin this journey. He compared this procedure to driving in a car. Without driving we can't get to the places we need to go-yet we also know that sometimes people die from car accidents. We recognize there is a small risk in driving but know that it is necessary. So too is my surgery-there are risks but it is necessary for me to get to where I'm going in my future. My next appointment is on the weekend-we will set a surgery date then assuming all tests come back normal. Finger's crossed!

I'm writing this post because today I had bad news about a close family friend. Since deciding on weight loss surgery I've been more aware of the triggers that make me want to eat needlessly. I never considered myself an emotional eater but I found out today that one of my closest friends has HIV and will be deported from the country.

This person is close to both my husband and myself-as well as my son. He's "uncle". I was so devastated not just to hear his diagnosis but to hear he would be ripped from the life he had created in Dubai for almost 5 years. I pass no judgement on how this came to be, however I do worry so much about his future, his career, his quality of life and how he will overcome this prognosis.

My first instinct was to eat eat eat.

Then I stopped and realized-was this how I have been dealing with setbacks both personal to me and for those I care for? Why did I think food would comfort me? Why would overeating solve my sadness.

It's not as though this realization helps more than to let me recognize a major trigger for the future. My husband has suggested that if I still feel sad I make an appointment with my therapist to help me understand my feelings better. I will! I need to know why I lack simple coping skills and how to better deal with them.

Still waiting on confirmation of my next (physical) exam. I assume it will be next week though many doctors travel during Ramadan.

Stay strong sleeves!

Sarah

I met with my surgeon yesterday to walk me through the procedure and what I can expect. He was pleased that I had spent so much time researching and that I was already familiar with what to expect. My husband came with me and was very supportive. He does most of the cooking so it was go for him to hear what the doctor had to say. I left feeling very excited-a bit nervous and the smallest bit worried that I won't succeed. I just keep picturing myself only losing 20 pounds (my usual max weight loss) then stalling and gaining again. I actually can't imagine being under 200 pounds since it has been so many years since I looked I the mirror at that weight. Currently I walk past a reflective surface and think there is no way I'm that big!

So while I'm excited and hopeful, I still have my own lingering doubts. The surgery is scheduled for August 1st. It will be a difficult wait, but we have a trip planned to visit with family for July. Last time I'll have family photos where I'm trying to hide my body behind everyone.

I will keep you updated :)