Well it is 2am and I am 5 days pre-op. I am so...
Well it is 2am and I am 5 days pre-op. I am so nervous and terrified. But excited all at the same time. I am 5'7 125lbs. I had my consultation at the end of September and my mom went with me, she does not have boobs either. So I think we got really wrapped up in trying on all the sizes and stuff that we chose way to big of a size for me. We chose 440cc HP silicone. As I got home I freaked out about the size, definitely way too big for my small frame. So I continued to look around at pictures and decided on 385cc MP. For many wondering why I want MP now instead of HP, I workout everyday the HP poke out a little too far for my comfort of working out and just doing life things for me. I have not told my doctor about the change since I have my official pre-op on Tuesday, for some reason I am nervous to tell him..what a loser, I know! But today is the second night in a row I am just to excited/nervous about it. I have been trying to get everything ready for the big day; cleaning, making tons of lists, homework, grocery shopping, work, etc. I am getting them done in San Francisco, which is about 2 hours away from me not counting traffic. My surgery is scheduled for 11am and we will begin driving home in high traffic time...GREAAATT!! I know this is my first post, but I've been reading hundreds of them and finally felt as though i should add my journey, nervous about putting pictures up but we will see. I will ass one of me and then two of my wish boobs. I will keep you guys posted as the days go on. Only 5 days left!!!!
4 More Days..and the Nerves Continue
I actually can't tell if I'm nervous,or just so excited that I can't stand it. I have wanted boobs for about four years. Each consultation I scheduled I chickened out and cancelled, which I do with most doctors appointments. I have always been the girl who has had a nice butt but nothing up top. I wear a 34A, on a good day. I just don't understand I mean I know my mom has small boobs, but my sister somehow got blessed with C boobs and I'm just over here like hey....! I guess what im trying to say in all of this is..I can not wait until Friday! My pre op day is tomorrow which I am super excited about! I get to tell Dr Gray about my sizing change and try the size on! I am 99% sure that I still want to go with 385cc of the gummy bear silicone implants in moderate profile. I will take some pictures tomorrow at my pre op. Just have to keep reminding myself to calm down and be patient.
2 Days Away! Plus Pre Op Appt.
OMG! I cannot believe that surgery is two days away (freaking out over here)! I had my pre op yesterday and was able to try on the 385cc in Moderate profile...they were PERFECT. Dr. Gray usually goes on width of your breast pocket, mine was 13. The 385cc has a width of 12.8 so he said that he will put them in and make a judgement call if they look to big balls on my chest he will figure out what size i should be. Nobody wants there boobs to look far apart and super round, or at least I don't. There is a girl who works at Dr. Gray's office, her name is Ashley. She is super awesome; super laid back and just tells you how it is, she's just great!
But let me just tell everyone out there unsure of what their size is, do what feel right and comfortable to you. If a doctor tries to push a certain size you should walk out. It is your body and they are going to be in your body for at least 10 years. Another thing, take into account all of the activities that you do. If you are a mom, if you are an athlete, if you want children someday, if you want to be conservative, etc. I know that it is a big choice, I mean my nervous stomach is coming right now just typing all of this. And i know that have of the stuff I wrote is for the future for most of us, but think about it trust me. For me I based my decision on; one, I live an incredibly active lifestyle. I go to the gym as often as I can, I play recreational sports, I go hiking, and I am also moving around in some sort of way. I changed my profile choice because of this fact. When I tried on the high profile they got in the way when I tried to cross my arms and when i bent over they were just hanging to the point of like me being like that is too much boob for this girl! The second factor was I want to have children. I have never had a child, so i know that when i do my body is going to change. While I'm pregnant my boobs will grow and even after they might get a little bigger. In knowing this I didn't want to go too large that my boobs would look odd as i aged. Again this is just me and things I considered, but I tend to over think things.
Okay, anyways, back to what I should be talking about lol! So at my preop I got my prescriptions (percoset, ambien, ranbaxy (for right after surgery), and some little nausea patch for the ride home), I took before and after pics, I signed consent forms and I did my final sizing. My fiancé was there so he was finally able to see what I am freaking out about. But he said any size I chose would ooh great, and if I chickened out hat I am perfect the way I am (awww he is so wonderful). So that was basically the pre op, short but sweet.
Today I am going to go to the store to pick up some essentials (pineapple juice (supposed to help with constipation), peach cups (helps with constipation), cocoa butter, vitamin E oil (both for scarring), ......I have a list but I don't have it by me so I will have to update of the things I read about and picked up from the store. I am trying to do my post op naturally if that makes sense. My body is already going to be going through so much stress of surgery and anesthesia and pain meds that I just want it to relax for a while, I mean I'm still going to take my pain meds! But as far as constipation I do want to take any supplements and scarring they offer this like $100 cream for scarring..read the ingredients it is a huge long list..not thank you! Especially since this surgery already brought my bank account down so low..double no thank you!! Haha! But I just want to give my body a break from putting crap in it that it doesn't need (ironic since I will be loving with silicone implants haha oh well I'm crazy like that).
Well I hope some of this helped you guys, I know some of it was pointless and me just rambling but there were some good points that I hope you guys think about and consider before deciding on your final size! Like i said I will post an update on what I buy from the store, some of you are probably freaking out just like I did for post op care, I read hundreds of articles so hopefully I get everything I think I will need. Also, I posted a new before picture hopefully it is a little clearer than the first! If you guys have any questions let me know :)
Tomorrow is the Day!!! Freaking Out
OMG tomorrow is the day! I cannot believe it. I don't know whether to freak out or to just try not to think about it haha. I have thought about this day for so many years and then to come to the realization that tomorrow is the day! Last night I slept wonderfully, which is a miracle because I haven't been able to. Tonight will probably be a different story! I will be leaving my house around 6am, although my surgery isn't until 11am. We have a hour and forty-five minute drive, but with traffic in the bay area it will be crazy. I can't eat past midnight tonight. I read a bunch of articles saying that when some women woke up from surgery they felt extremely dehydrated, so today I will be drink a BUNCH of water! Eating will be hard today as i get really bad nervous stomach, so i need to just force some food down!
Yesterday I went to the store, like I mentioned. I bought prunes, diced peaches, pineapple juice, baby wipes, organic cheddar bunnies, smooth move tea, vitamin e lotion, and cocoa butter (picture). I tried finding other things that would be necessary but I have no idea what i will need. Plus since my fiancé will be working every day that I am going to be recovering, I am going to go stay with my parents. Which will be wonderful because my mom will do everything need help with!
Tomorrow I will post a picture before I leave for the doctors with what I will be wearing and another before picture. I am going to need to do some intense meditation tonight! haha
Today is THE DAY!!
17 Oct 2014
Day of treatment
Well it is 6:15am here. My surgery is today! I sort of feel weird. Like, you know when you long for something for so long and then it is unbelievable that it is actually here..yeah thats where I'm at! Like I don't feel overly excited or nervous. I feel surprisingly calmer than expected (and if you know anything about me..I am the opposite of a calm person!) The only thing I can say so far is that i am THIRSTY!! On a normal day I wake up chug a bottle of water and have a cup of coffee to wake me up, no coffee no water..soo thirsty. Yesterday I drank about 1.2 gallons of water so I know I drank a lot yesterday like I read about.
My parents are on their way to pick me up. I'm sad that my fiancé won't be there and I won't see him for 3 days....that makes me sad.
Well ladies, wish me luck. I hope I wake up in no pain and looking like I have a great rack! haha Oh the wishes haha Ok will update periodically, depending on how I am feeling. Thank you for all of the support!
p.s. oh yeah I added new pictures
Days 1-5 Post Op
Sorry I haven't been on in so long ladies! Been busy and trying to recover properly. The day of surgery was honestly a blur. We left at about 6:30 and didn't get into the city until 10:30...NIGHTMARE! Once we arrived the surgery before mine took a while so we waited. The nurse (she was super nice and very comforting) brought me back into the pre op room and put me in this little gown thing that when attached to a tube became like a heating blanket (bare paws or something like that). She gave me some anxiety medicine to calm me down a little. Thirty minutes later she came and put my IV in. I said good bye to my parents, started crying because my fiancé wasn't there (you know the usual). The last thing I remember was laying on the operating table and having my arms to my side. I don't remember waking up, I don't remember driving home...I don't remember much until about 9pm. My parents asked if I wanted foo I said no. I payed on the couch and watched cartoons (guilty pleasure) an then fell asleep. They ended up putting 435cc in, which I said if the 385 would look too far apart I didn't want them so I'm guessing they were. That's one thing that sucks about the moderates..385cc width is 12.5 and then it jumps to 435cc width at 13.2...there should definitely be a middle size.
Day 1&2 I didn't do much I stayed in bed and I got up every hour to walk around for about 10minutes. I was able to lift my arms half way on day two. I didn't eat really anything..like I had my cheddar bunnies and pain meds haha super healthy I know! All I know was that my boobs felt like rocks on my chest..and sitting up was the hardest thing to do! But I was able to do it on my own and I opened my pill bottles and water bottles on my own. There wasn't too much I relied on anyone to do for me. I think that was the key to my healing.
Well today is the fifth day and I feel about 85% healed. My boobs are still hard and tight but the pressure feeling has gone down and I am able (so far) to walk across campus without feeling out of breath. Day three I went back I school and boy that was tough. I put on a happy face but secretly wished I was still on the couch. I had stopped my pain meds during the day on day three and that could've messed me up too. But I made it through and was lucky enough to just come home and lay down the rest of the day. Day four I woke up feeling AWESOME. Slight pressure but not bad. Then I went to school and have a dance class and thought why not try to do some of the moves, bad idea. I felt light headed and just out of breath. I clearly pushed my self and body too hard. I went home and layer on the couch again. Day 5 has been great. I am not taking any pain meds not even at night. I laid flat on my back last night which was great! So far it has been an awesome speedy recovery.
Tomorrow is my week 1 post op. So I will keep you updated. Also day 1 after surgery drink the smooth move tea you won't regret it. I just had my first BM today because I forgot all about the constipation. I got bloated and it wasn't cute. I haven't cried at all which is good. Oh and two days after I started my period...GREAT!!
Ok sorry TMI. I will keep you updated ??
One Week Post Op!!
This week has flown by! Everything is going great. My right boob is still a little numb which is weird. My left boob is definitely becoming "normal" at a faster rate. My nipples are coney shaped as I described them almost like engorged (not cute). I like not wearing a bra so if I can I take it off for about 20min. I do!! Other than that everything is still the same!
New pictures of my one week boobs compared to me two wish boobs! Let me know what you ladies think!
5 Month Update!
20 Mar 2015
5 months post
It's been so long since I've written and I keep meaning to post. Just been so busy, so sorry everyone!
Month 5 and my boobs are good. Soft and when my sister touched them this weekend she said , "it's weird they feel so real, you can't even feel the implant!" So that just made my year haha. My right boob still has a little difference like only in my nipples. I have feeling in both of them but when my nipples get hard it takes the right one a little longer. Which im fine with its not a competition haha.
I am wearing a size 32 D-32DD, but DD is only at Victoria's secret or in push up bras. But to be honest, I haven't even worn a push up bra. My boobs look perfect in a regular bra, which I never thought I would say!
I am able to sleep on my side and I sometimes sleep without a bra. If I go without a bra for too long my boobs feel heavy and start to ache a bit. My scars have gone through three phases. The first was swollen a and bumpy. The it went to skin color and bumpy. To flat and pinkish. I have started to rub lotion on them again, because I want them to go away and I don't want stretch marks.
After my surgery I gained weight which I hate but I'm slowly getting back into the gym. Chest exercises are difficult. They don't hurt but it just feels weird and I get scared I am going to harm the implant, which I probably won't but it just feels weird. Running is actually really easy. I thought I was going to die the first two weeks after my surgery just walking up stairs I was out of breath because I wasn't used to the pressure or weight on my chest, which I have never been winded I have always 5 miles every other day.
But honestly my boobs are wonderful. If you have any questions let me know! ????