I tried to start a journey here but some how it...
I tried to start a journey here but some how it didn't work. But I will try again. It all began when I was 20yo. (About 1979) Ba #1. I was about 115lbs, 5'3" had not sure what silicone overs. I'm thinking 250cc
Ba #2 (about ten years later) had cc had them replaced. Same doc. Went with 350cc still overs. Nice full c cup
Ba #3 (about ten yrs later) left breast cc. Right breast ok. Went to new doc (old doc in Wilshire had lic stripped because he was addicted to Demerol) sooo I told new doc just change out the cc one. Other one is fine and he did.
#4 about ten years later ( I'm seeing a pattern here) had right cc. Told doc getting older not too big don't want to be matronly. He changed them out 475cc natrelle silicone. This was oct 2012
#5 right breast never really got soft. Oct 2013 had it changed out again same cc same natrelle.
#6 new doc. Advised go under add alloderm and lift. He's expensive but he's the best.
Surgery was July 1st. Recovery, of course much more painful than I was used to. I expected that. A lot of work was done and now we were messing with the muscle,
I'm 2 weeks post. Had 3 drains up to yest. Yest he removed 2 as the other one was still draining a little more than we would like. So a couple more days I will be free of the last drain. They have been such a pain to get dressed. It's hard to cover the bulky drains.
I am hopeful that this "is it". I would really wish not to ever mess with my boobs again. I have invested a lot of money on these puppies.
Soooo. I am being patient. Not sure of how they look yet. I think I gotta wait to see "final product". Right now they look smashed under my muscle and I. Concerned they a little close together. I will address that to ps on thurs when I have last drain removed
It's been a long journey. I have been obsessed with real self since last nov. When I decided something had to be done about this darned right boob. Always just wanted the natural look. Oh these last ones were 435 and 440 one was high profile one was mod profile sientra
Post op 2 weeks
First "real look" at them" hmmmm
Well it's been 3 weeks. Still look weird and too big for my chest. The scar is scary. I hope there some dropping still to go
4 weeks and popped stitch
4 weeks today. I really haven't seen much change. I can tell some of the swelling is down. But they still look wide and flat. No projection. Make me look like I have a wide chest but I don't. Last nite i noticed a "popped" stitch where vertical incision meets horizontal incision. There's a little "hole" there. Freaking me out! Don't want infection. And don't want horrible scar. It looks bad enough already. Called ps today and going in later. Let's see what he can do. I just don't understand. 4 weeks. No work. No holding grandson. I'm still not even washing my own hair! What else can I not do?? Drove for the first time yest. Common???? Depressed.....
Ok 5 weeks. Still kinda sore. Still get really tired after a few hours of being out and about. Hope my "hole" is healing under bandages. Peeked at it tda. Still looks yucky. Will see ps on Thursday. I'll see what he thinks...sorry photos kept loading upside down. Tried 3 times
Still not thrilled with the look of these boobs. Still look "wide". Not very natural. Cleavage is is "flat". Still sitting high. Massaging to try to get them to drop. Still sore. Still feel like implants are stuffed under my muscle. Waiting for them to feel like part of me.....
11 Sep 2014
2 months post
Hi everyone...I feel there is not much change. Still riding very high. Thinking if they would just drop some it would somehow look better..ps tell me not to be so hard on myself and let me tell you I try I really try. I try to not tell my husband how unhappy I am but I think he sees it.. They just look and feel so unnatural. My number one priority. They don't move. Not all. Now I am wearing a thong bra day and night. It is so irritating and hot. I think it aggravates my scar and is delaying it from healing well. It rubs against the horizontal incision and irritates it. But I really want my cleavage and don't want to develop symmastia. So all day and night with this thing. It had better work. It gets so hot! Waiting to see if there will be any difference at three months..hope so..well wait, hope and pray.....maybe it will all work itself out...my ps seems to think so..I hope I tagged the pics right. They appear in a small square upside down with a green check in the middle. Hard to see the actual pic...
4 mos in a week
21 Sep 2014
2 months post
Ok boobs look a little better but still have a ways to go before I am happy. They sit higher than I would like and at this point not sure even if they drop more it will help them look better.Have very diff shapes and still don't move . Weird soft but yet stiff not natural. Like when I pus them together for cleavage they don't move much. Thong bra seems to be working somewhat (better cuz it sucks wearing it) massaging like crazy. Hard to cover thong bra be up of the way the straps are in front of my chest. Waiting ......waiting.... Geez is it too much to ask for a pair of natural looking boobs!!!!
3 1/2 mos
17 Oct 2014
3 months post
Sorry. Last update I was gonna be 3mos. Now I'm 31/2 mos. still not happy. Boobs look weird. No cleavage. Miss my cleavage. Still look weird, high and wide and give me armpit fat I never had. Look weird when I push my breasts together. Unnatural. No bounce. I don't know what happened. I think they are the right size. I think they are just not sitting right or something. Still wearing stupid thong bra. And sports bra and sometimes surgical bra at night for strap....massaging. Seem to be soft. Left greater than right. They are just not "pretty" boobs!!!!! I'm so over this and frustrated!!!!
10 Feb 2015
7 months post
Ok. So it's been 7mos. And this is what I got. I have contacted ps and office said. Sometimes it takes a year or longer for boobs to "settle". Still trying to be patient but it's hard. These are my feelings. 1. I don't feel I have any cleavage or profile. And very self conscience of flex deformity. I just don't show them:((. Doctor said make appt and see if he can do something if anything (?) not too promising. Maybe I should just give up and call it a day. On a good note. No cc. Right one feels firmer thN the left but I don't think it's cc.....
Well it's been a long 9 mos. still would like to fix flex muscle deformity. My muscle feels contracted with the slightest reach. I vacuum with my hand over my right breast muscle because it feels flexed.., and revision on the lift scar. I've seen so many that look good so I know it could look way better. Haven't seen the doctor about it yet. Since the last visit doidnt go so well I'm a little gun shy....
10 1/2 mos
20 May 2015
10 months post
Ok going to see dr Pousti in a bit. And tell him my concerns. 1. I can feel my implant on my right inner boob (not enuf alloderm?) 2. I think they just never "dropped and fluffed" not his fault boobs just didn't do what they are supposed too. They sit very high on my chest and don't look "natural" (yes I understand they are implants) but I miss my "bounce" they just sit on my chest. And 3. Probably most important my muscle always feels tight and sore. That should have relaxed by now. The good news is no cap contracture....I hope he understands and will agree to revise them so I can be happy. Revision is def not anything I would look for. It took a very long time to heal and a lot of time off work last year when I had them done. So if there was a chance at all that I could be happy with the way they are I would def leave them!
I am very nervous about my apt. I hope it goes well....he's an awesome doc..we have all seen his work and I know he could make them look better....
Revision surgery was June 26th. So I'm almost 2 weeks out. I ended up with a new implant on the left side same size just hp because I thought they were too high and wide. I gave him wish pics. I think we were on the same page. He addressed the pseudo symmastia (cuz he said it wasn't quite symmastia) I wanted the "natural slope he said he rounded out bottom pocket and I had a spot on my right inner boob where implant was palpable so he placed more allograft. I had a good amount of wish pics. So I am now hoping and praying for uneventful and cooperative boobs that will drop and fluff....I really think he tried his best. I know that he and his staff tried their best to make me happy. I really do appreciate his staff. Love them all but Vanessa has found a special place in my heart....the only thing is for the last couple of days I have been having pain in my left boob that I had to go back on 1/2 Percocet. I had already put those away last week. I will have to check with ps and see what they have to say.
3 weeks out. So far big improvements.... Left breast shaped different. Hoping it will drop to match right. Doing my massage and trying to help it along but pretty high and tight right now. Crossing my fingers and praying to God I get some cooperation from this breast! Back to work on Monday. Left breast is still kinda sore....right breast no pain at all.......
4 weeks. Can't wait to get this thing off my sternum. Left breast still needs to drop. Not sure if maybe scar tissue from breast lift will not allow it to drop more. Hope not. Anyway doing lots of massaging .....and hoping
Ok 2 months pics. Thing came off the sternum and was replaced by the thong bra...about two weeks ago I noticed the dreaded "pimlple" like thing and of course I squeezed it. White fluid came out and scared the crap out of me... Fearing infection vs stitch trying to make its way out. I was cleaning it and applying topical antibiotic for 2 days but then I figuered might as drag my a** over to the doctors office. I had already sent them pics and we all agreed I should come in and have him take a look. Well he said he thought it was a stitch too and gave me antibiotics to take for 10days...and hope it heals. Well I think it's healing good. It's still scabby but no sign of infection. Hope it stays that way cuz I really don't want another round of antibiotics. I can still feel the implant on my inner right boob. Hopefully more tissue will grow into allograft and thicken it up. Not exactly sure how that works. Still have kinda "loose" skin on the right breast. I'm thinking if it falls a little lower into the pocket it will fill out better but then again done want them to low. Aye.... I need to just leave them alone. It's that fight. Getting older but hoping to keep my body younger....(I thought that's where cosmetic surgery came in).,.
You know, I just wanna be happy with my boobs now and just can't seem to get there. Is it freaking me???? I see lopsided boobs nipples that are off, different shapes, still feel implant and rippling on the right side and to think how much money I have spent on them flips me out and forbids me to spend any more money on my boobs!!!! Maybe I'm just stuck with these..I went to the greatest doc ever. I have seen him perform miracles on women's boobs. Even women my age but I feel mine still are not cosmetic "pretty" should I just deal with them and shut up?????? By this time I wanted them to be settled and look great. He did warn me they would not be 100% but he did say 75% is this 75%????gosh. I so do wanna be happy...boobs have never been such an issue...I know others have such serious issues and I'm complaining but it is what it is....sorry a frustrating Saturday I guess
well unfortunately still here. So, so wish I was happy with what I got. I have invested 18k with this doctor. (Not counting the 6k I spent with the doctor before in 2012 and 2013) I should have some kickass boobs. They should be the best thing on my whole body. Everything else may be going downhill but my boobs should look freaking awesome! I've had implants for 35 years and there's no way I can ex plant I wouldn't be able to psychologically handle it...when I came to this doc in 2014 I thought I had found the boob god himself. His pics, his reviews, his confidence... I was willing to pay the high cost (12k) "to have it done right" once and for all. It has been so frustrating. I've seen mtf surgeries look better...besides the cosmetic look the muscle deformity is the most bothersome. It's my right breast and any time I do ANYTHING it flexes..sometimes it feels flexed all the time. Not so much painful but very very bothersome..sometimes I just want to leave it alone but I feel so bad pYing so much money for something I am so unhappy with.
The shapes are so different. The right boob is flat and bumpy. Looks like old boobs that someone would be going for and wanting a revision. Not like a set that is 6months old. New and perky. I miss the upper "contour" to me they look "messy" the arreolas are not nice and "round". Still not "bouncy" and "natural " like I was hoping for. Idk. I just expected so much more from him..
he fixed pseudo symmastia (he created)and lowered them. They were way too high. Put another allograft right breast because he had only put a small piece under each breast (first surgery) but immediately after first surgery I felt implant inner lower breast where you would have thought first allograft would have been. (They come in sheets). Should have covered that area. I never felt my implants when the were "over" the muscle..now I feel them and they are "under" the muscle. (I had to pay for more allograft for revision surgery) therefore, revision costing me another 6k. I wanted a more "natural" look..and he was supposed to fix muscle deformity.,.
14 mos after revision
Well here's my pics. Still very questionable results.
1. Still feel they are too wide. I never had that underarm overage of skin before.they make me look "broad shouldered ". I am not.
2. Still have flex muscle deformity. Anytime I do ANYTHING it flexes and looks yuck and feel very self conscious about it.
3. They do not look sexy at all. I always say for as much money as I have paid for them they should be the best thing about my body......not.
4. They look awful laying down. They fall to the sides...maybe I needed a better pocket revision.
5. They are 430cc and have no projection. They feel like they are "stuck" on my chest. No movement no "jiggly" no nothing. They do. It feel "natural" at all. I so wanted them to look and feel natural.
6. I feel the right one now more than when it was over the muscle. I feel the edge of the implant all along the inner crease? Why? I also feel a ripple on the inner left one.
7. They just don't look good. Not close to my "goal" pics... Don't know what to do..live with them I guess.