18 Year Old Who Made the Dumbest Mistake - Rochester, NY

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This really is the dumbest thing i have ever done...

This really is the dumbest thing i have ever done in my life. I really can't believe I went through with it. I got a spontaneous mandala tattoo that I haven't given much thought to and got it done in a really small area just because it was next to my college and didn't bother researching other places. I was set on getting it done at that tattoo shop because it was 25% off for Fredonia students. (I'm from upstate New York) I immediately hated it but was too afraid to tell the artist because she was very sweet and wanted me to like it even though you could see it in her face that she wasn't proud of it either. I knew she messed up in the middle of it because of the face she did and I knew I fucked up. I don't know why I went through with this. I really hate myself for allowing this to happen. I can't believe I got a bad mandala tattoo done at a newly opened shop with artists who don't have a lot of experience. I wasn't thinking at all and just wanted tattoos but now I'm certain I will not be getting any more tattoos in the future. My mom is very against tattoos and will be very pissed when she finds out. Worst part is, I used her money and I can't believe I did this. I really do hate myself as a person right now and I realized after that it wasn't right to do that. I have been self loathing for a while. I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror because I don't even know who I am anymore. This wasn't even the design I wanted. I gave her a picture of what I wanted and she didn't give it to me but this is a lesson learned and I realize that I could have prevented this very easily and just walked out the shop. no one to blame but myself and I have never hated anyone more than myself. When the tattoo artist said she would shade it, I didn't know she was just gonna color it in. I should have seen all of the red flags. She was inexperienced, shop just opened, there was no consultation and it was an unprofessional environment. I wish I walked out. I really fucked up bad and now I have to live with the regret until I could get the treatments. My mom will never forgive me and it sucks but it is my fault and I don't expect pity from anyone. I could barely focus in class anymore and I feel so behind. I can barely eat and this situation has affected me mentally and emotionally. I feel like I am losing my mind and I really can't believe this is happening. Im gonna try and go in for a consultation with picosecond laser treatment at a hospital in Rochester. Right now, I am home and they aren't opened on weekends. I'm gonna have to transfer schools to be closer to home so I could get the treatments and I really hope I could get a job. this is gonna be one long painful journey. If you're also young, please don't do something as stupid as I did. I really wish I found this site before my tattoo appointment. think before you ink.

Discovered two possible areas for the treatments

My school is two hours away from home (Rochester) which was the picosecond laser and seems like the best laser to get rid of the dense black ink on my forearm. I have also discovered a place in Buffalo called Southgate which is a lot closer to my school and will be calling both areas for more information to see what is the best fit. I am really nervous and afraid i'll never get this tattoo off but i'm still hopeful. i really hope the ink isn't that deep and i hope that since it's done by an amateur it'll be a little bit easier to take out. i'm afraid of the pricing because i've been told it's a lot of black ink and it's kind of big. But it could be worse..at least there's only black ink and at least i didn't lose my arm. i'm trying to stay positive but it's so hard living with this regret.


I have called the number for Southgate but there was no answer so i called the number for UR medicine and they told me that the minimum is $200 per treatment and the lady on the phone told me i should wait at least a month for the tattoo to heal. I haven't scheduled a consultation with them yet but after a month i will eventually do that. I'll still be researching other areas but each place i come across has the same laser (picosure)

Approximately a month later

It has been a month since i got my tattoo done and i can honestly say that the shock and depression has worn off but i still feel incredibly guilty and i'm still not a fan of the tattoo. I kind of learned how to live with it but i still feel like i can't do the things i used to love doing anymore. When i go shopping, i never buy anything anymore because i know i have to save up for treatments. I avoid buying anything because when i do i feel depressed. I have avoided going home because i still haven't spoken to my mom and i still don't know what i'm going to say to her and i'm still afraid of what's gonna happen.

I have worn short sleeves around campus for the first time in awhile and to my surprise i have actually gotten compliments on the tattoo so that makes me feel a little bit better.

The tattoo has peeled and it isn't as black as it used to be which i'm happy about. What i find strange is that i can still see my skin through the tattoo. That gives me some hope that the artist didn't go that deep into my skin and it won't be that bad to remove. I haven't scheduled a consultation yet but in about a week i'll be doing that. Right now, i'm experimenting with makeup and it doesn't cover it up all the way but it's still pretty faded. I honestly won't even mind if that tattoo doesn't come off all the way just as long as it's not as black and noticeable.

Month later p2

Forgot to add that i noticed something weird about the tattoo... i think it's fully healed but my skin underneath it looks weird. There's some skin that looks "shiny" and i'm worried its scarred. Anyways, here are some pictures of the healed tattoo. It faded quite a bit and in one of the pictures you can even see my skin.. In these close ups i hope some of you can see why i hate the tattoo so much. Closer up, you can see the multiple mistakes and messed up lines. As of right now, i'm set on lasering this off and will be making the call soon.

Still have not made a decision

After having the tattoo for several months I can honestly say the emotional and mental trauma has definitely went away. My tattoo may be poorly done but it could be 10x worse. After getting this tattoo, it has taught me not to make impulse decisions. Also, I have gone through a lot of painful experiences that made this tattoo seem like a nuisance problem (which it really is). It has been roughly 7 months and I honestly don't think about it as much or loathe myself for doing something this stupid. I have grown to accept the tattoo but i am still indecisive because I am a perfectionist and seeing those crooked patterns and fucked up flower makes me a little irritated. It's also way too dark for my taste. Currently, I've been thinking about finding a really good tattoo artist who can lighten the ink using grey or white or meet with a laser technician and ask them how many sessions it will take + the overall cost. I don't want to go through with expensive laser removal if it won't be gone completely. My tattoo has a lot of black ink and I haven't seen a lot of success stories with thick black ink


It has almost been a whole year with my forearm tattoo. I have already decided that getting rid of it isn't as important as it used to be because i am currently dealing with health issues and bettering myself. I still hate the tattoo and feel like it gives me a bad image. I feel like people have a negative image about me when they see a poorly done tattoo on my arm. I still wish I can go back to the day I got this tattoo and saved myself and my money. Whenever I look at it, I still can't believe I did it. I still think about laser treatments, but i also think about how much money it would be. It kind of upsets me to know that almost a year has gone by and i haven't done anything about it by now. If i go through with laser treatments, it seems unrealistic that this whole thing will go away. It is dark ink and will require a lot of treatments which means a lot more money. If i go to another tattoo artist to lighten it up and rework the tattoo, there is no guarantee i will be pleased with it for the rest of my life. If i had gotten this on my back instead of my forearm, i would be able to live with this a lot longer before making a decision.
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