So I've been lurking around this site for weeks...
So I've been lurking around this site for weeks and I'm finally ready to share my story: I've wanted to get rid of my FUPA...fat upper pubic area...and stretch mark ridden tummy for at least the past 7 years. The BA is really just a bonus. I've lost 25 lbs on Weight Watchers but am still uncomfortable with my naked body. I want to be able to wear a two piece bathing suit for Pete's sake!! Is that too much to ask? I'm so blessed to have a very supportive fiance and I'm finally able to do something to fix these problem areas. But I have to admit, I'm terrified. My dad--who is one of the most important people in my life is totally against it and so are my two teenage sons. So that kinda makes every thing just a little more frustrating. But I'm still determined to do this for me!
I had my first consult with an area PS on Monday, that went pretty good. He recommended that I get a mini TT and lipo with my BA. I was a bit shocked to hear that I don't need a full tummy tuck. I kept thinking to myself "are we looking at the same tummy???" I have consult with another area PS coming this Monday. I feel like I should have at least 3 opinions before I make a decision. It might be overkill but I'm a Virgo and will analyze the mess out of a decision, if I'm able :) But I'm really ready to get this show on the road. I want to have a surgery date booked for February just as soon as I decide who I want to trust with my body and essentially my life.
I've enjoyed reading about other women's journeys on this site and I will be back with updates after my next PS consult. Until then, here are some before pictures.
Really? I only need a mini TT. Still can't believe it...
Just popping in to say: I can barely wait til Monday for a second opinion. I'm so ready to be on the flat side.
Had another consult today
Okay, so now I'm really confused. I had a consultation with a different PS today, my second consult. The second PS recommended the total opposite of what the first PS recommended. He didn't think I am a candidate for a mini TT (which totally goes along with what I was thinking)...I really want to scream!!! I'm so overwhelmed. I never thought this could get so confusing. I'm so nervous to choose wrong and hate the results. But I must say the second PS was very thorough and took up alot of time with me. He seemed very knowledgeable....
I don't know if I should see a third PS or choose now. Decisions, decisions...
scheduled MM surgery today
Well, I finally got up the nerve to schedule surgery today. I chose Dr. Christopher Morea as my PS. I've heard so many good things about his work. The consultation I had with him on Monday really impressed me. I'm extremely nervous and excited at the same time. I'm sure this month of waiting will be a roller coaster of emotions. I'm trying to stay positive and think happy thoughts. I've designated a picture of a Victoria Secret bikini I want to buy for summer as a gentle motivation. Lol. Hey, whatever works. Don't judge me. :)
Another difficult thing today was figuring out how to approach my supervisor for a 3 week vacation. Its my time, I've earned it. But I have a job that my work doesn't stop coming just because I'm out of the office, so I will definitely be swamped when I return. He had no problem reminding me of that during our little talk. But whatever: Life is short. I have the opportunity to do this. My amazing fiance has paid for it in full. Therefore I will proceed with no regrets...at least that's my attitude for now. I'm also having some submental lipo done to get rid of a little pocket of fat under my chin so I imagine on the day after surgery when I'm bandaged from the head to the waist, I will have an entirely different outlook. :)
Am I the only one...
Am I the only one slightly freaked out about Real Selfers who religiously post updates prior to surgery and then surgery day comes and you never see anymore updates??!!
Where do I get sizers?
I keep seeing posts about sizers. Does the doctor provide those or where can I get some?
exactly 27 days away and I'm seriously freaking out.
I've been having nightmares about the surgery and losing hours of sleep at night. I talked to my therapist yesterday and she is telling me to retrain my brain with positive affirmations every time I have a negative thought about the surgery. That helped last night...only to wake up this morning and read on instagram about a quasi celebrity named Lashawn Lindsey who died last week after complications from a TT procedure. ***gasp*** . I know there's a risk associated with anything but today I am really on the verge. I can't imagine waiting all these days with this level of anxiety, I'd rather just get it done and over with. I've taken another before picture to remind myself why I'm doing this...I don't know if what I'm feeling is normal or I'm being overly dramatic. I'm gonna try to hang in there but it's getting more difficult by the day. :(
more before pics
So I'm getting a full TT with flank lipo, BA with silicone, and submental lipo in a little over 2 weeks. At this point, I am absolutely obsessed with before and after photos. I'm loving these transformations. I haven't found many befores that are similar to my current measurements so I'll keep looking and then post some wish pics.
Fun with rice sizers
Me and the future hubs are having too much fun with rice sizers (and wine) tonight. :)
475 to 500cc seems to be the magic number for me. We will see what my PS says on surgery day.
I really wonder how in the world I will go back to work without all kinds of inquisitive stares wondering how my bust size magically grew in the 3 weeks I will be out of the office. I'm a very low key person that likes to fly under the radar but this will surely get some tongues wagging. I will show pics of me in clothes with and without the rice sizers to show the huge difference. Please tell me how are some of you handling the questions or attention when you go back to work?
just got the phone call from the nurse anesthetist
I told myself I was going to give this website a break until after my surgery but the phone call from the nurse anesthetist to go over my medical history just now sent me in a tailspin of emotions again. I'm sure my fiance is growing weary of my incessant worrying so I will use this forum as a diary of sorts. :)
The CRNA was very sweet and answered all my questions satisfactorily. She gave all my post op instructions and is mailing my prescriptions today. I'm gonna be so nervous on op day and she told me not to take my klonopin that morning!! (in case it isn't obvious, I have generalized anxiety disorder). I don't know how I will get through that unmedicated.
My time is nearly here and I've only bought sports bras...only sports bras!!! I feel so unprepared right now looking at the extensive post op lists of some Real Selfers.
My transformation is exactly one week from today !!!
Been snowed in the past couple of days because, of course, the world stops when NC gets a couple inches of the white stuff. Anyway, I've had nothing but time to research and ruminate because I haven't had the distraction of work. It's been a serious emotional rollercoaster. I even went back to Dr. Morea's office again last week to talk more about CCs. I feel like I'm being a pain in the ass but I am so nervous I will get boobs that are either too small or too fake looking. He's a great doctor; I've seen his work and read all his sterling reviews so I know it's just my anxiety that's totally out of control.
I got my prescriptions filled on Monday: Emend, Phenergan, Zithromax, and Percocet. It came to roughly $25, which was a pleasant surprise. My fiance's parents are letting me borrow one of their recliners for my recovery so that's taken care of. This weekend I will be cleaning and preparing meals that can be frozen and put I'm the crock pot at a later date for my fellas. I'll probably get a bit of shopping done as well....I still only have that one sports bra checked off the post-op essentials list... :)
Today is THE day!
25 Feb 2015
Day of treatment
It's almost 6am, and I've been awake for the last hour. Honestly, I'm terrified. Part of me is excited the day is finally here while another part wants to go run and hide. To make matters worse there is a snowstorm in the area that has pretty much paralyzed the city and surrounding areas. The PS office called yesterday afternoon. I thought they were going to postpone me but they were just making sure I intended on being there as planned this morning. I told them I would be there even if I have to walk. Lol. I was talking tough when inside I'm barely holding it together. RS has been invaluable to me throughout this process. If anyone out there prays, please pray that I have an uncomplicated surgery with great results.
This is reason I'm doing this...
25 Feb 2015
Day of treatment
I took pics last night that show me how I look now and I will compare these with how I will look as my healing progresses. Following along others with before and after pics has really motivated me through this process. Hopefully, this will pay it forward for those that come after me.
I was warned...
Depression starting to kick in because I want to feel better and I'm bored. Oh, and I want to poop!!!
more post op pics
Lipo bruises on my backside are plenty sore. Chest is tight. Tummy incision doesn't really bother me that much today but drain sites are leaking probably from me being too active and standing up too straight too soon.
a good day
Needed less narcotic pain meds today so, of course, I was alot more lucid and energetic. Took a short shopping trip to Target just to get out of the house. Appetite is picking up a little. I think I've turned a corner. :)
4 days post op--when to lie in bed???
I just took a shower completely unassisted while the future Hubs ran to the market. I'm so proud of myself (took pics, of course) I know it's early on but I'm very pleased with aesthetics thus far with the exception of the few small stretch marks that were above my belly button that are now below it but I already knew that would be the case; can't have it all. I may be rushing recovery right along but, seriously, I'm in very little pain and the last time I took tylenol was at 7am. I'm thinking I won't take anything during the day from now on and only before sleep take a couple of tylenol pm to help me get a good night's rest. Speaking of night, I'm tired of the recliner!!! I want to lie in bed with my fiance because I miss intimacy. :-(
(I'm a hopeless romantic!!) He has remained in the livingroom with me the entire time but I miss the bed. When did some of you TT veterans feel most comfy lying down straight all night?!
OMG! 1 drain out and it nearly killed me!
Had my first follow up today and the nurse said I was practically skipping in. Well, I wasn't skipping out after I got a drain snatched out..Dr. Morea said the best way to do it was to surprise me the way he did. Boy, what a sensation!! I have to call back tomorrow with the cc drainage of the remaining drain and possibly go back in to have that one pulled. Not looking forward to that in the least. I'll not only need a couple percocet but some valium as well. Lol. I still love my doc. He says everything looks good. Get my surgical tapes off and the stitch out of my chin from the lipo there. Will post pics later. Right now, I need a nap or something.
I managed to take close ups of my incision this morning since the surgical tape was removed at my first post op appointment yesterday. I haven't wanted to be anywhere near there since the drain removal debacle. Lol. I'm a bit swollen and, apparently, I still have stretch marks on the sides near my hips. I'm still very pleased. I have ALOT less stretch marks than previously, a flat tummy, and will have amazing boobs when they finally drop. The trade off is an incision that right now is low, symmetrical, and thin. I hope it will heal well.
Feel like I'm regressing a bit
I feel like I had been doing alot better post op than I am now. Since yesterday, my stamina is nearly nonexistent. The littlest thing tires me completely out. I'm completely without drains now so I thought I would be ready to rock and roll. Let me tell you, I'm so incredibly sore all of a sudden, taking a shower makes me feel like I've run a marathon, and cooking a simple meal for the kids feels like some ancient form of torture. I am literally bent over the counter only a few minutes into it. My breasts feel so tight and sore, like they will pop any minute. My back is killing me. My compression garment feels like its getting a tad tighter than normal. The only thing that's going well for me right now is my incision seems to be healing well with no real pain there. I refuse to restart percocet so I've gone back to taking tylenol during the day and sitting my a$$ down somewhere as much as I possibly can. One of my son's missed the bus this morning and I was able to drive him to school about 6 miles each way so that was a milestone, albeit an unwelcomed one the way I've been feeling lately. Has anyone else experienced what feels like a setback during the course of recovery?
I think much of my issue on post op day 8 was related to PMS. Once my nipples got insanely sensitive, it was a dead giveaway. I feel better today, however, I continue to have swelling in addition to PMS bloat. :(
I'm drinking lemon water and pure unsweetened cranberry juice with one part water to help with water retention. I think it's working. Today I can see more of a definition in my waistline than previously. That makes me happy. Breasts are still high and tight but have come down a bit. This is a long journey, but I'm still happy I took it.
Had my second post op a couple days ago and was cleared to start scar treatment. I am officially 2 weeks post op. My PS recommended Cortisil MDX. The stuff is $75 for one ounce! It helps with itching too though and my incisions were starting to itch. I hope it works superbly because I find it expensive. I will give it try for a few months. Other than that, no changes. Still swollen in my abdomen (seems like it's moving downward towards the incision), boobs still high but not as tight. I will be glad to see them drop and fluff because they are massive compared to what I had and I am starting to feel like I was a victim of boob greed. I tried on some of my pre op clothes and everything looks a bit obscene with a semi-flat tummy and the twins standing at attention. *sigh* Patience is a virtue. In other news, I started back on Weight Watchers because I fear not being active I will put on weight, which is not an option. I don't want to be skinny because I like curves on a woman but I think I could stand to lose another 8-10 pounds and be okay.
3 weeks post op
Tomorrow will make exactly 3 weeks since I had my MM. I feel EXCELLENT!! It's almost like I didn't have anything done. I haven't had any pain whatsoever. In fact, I feel so good I find it hard not to engage my abdominal muscles in daily activities. I have to make a conscious effort to take it easy. I still have swelling issues but I am fitting into my clothes again. I'm still wearing my CG 24/7, except to shower. I find it just feels better on. Plus I have to wear it a whole month per my PS. My boobs are getting softer and settling slowly. They feel like a part of me, like I've always had them. I've been able to lay down straight on my back in bed since day 8. Lately, I have been turning on my sides when I'm asleep and after awhile, I wake up remembering I should probably be on my back. (I'm a side sleeper by nature). My fiance and I have resumed our "love life" since week 2, taking it very, very easy and it hasn't been a problem. This new body has reallly got me going, and him too! He's 16 years older than me but I can't tell. ;)
I digress. I go back to work Monday. Primarily, it's a desk job; in hindsight, I could've gone back after 2 weeks. I was sure I would need 3 weeks after reading so many MM stories on here. My recovery hasn't been as difficult as I imagined...with the exception of the horrible PMS I had a couple weeks ago. BTW, I love my incision!! I have no regrets!
week 5/6 post op
Just popping in to share some pics. I'm still recovering very well. Unfortunately, I still have swelling issues. Some days are worse than others. I do get discouraged from time to time. In the morning, the swelling is not very noticeable but as the day wears on I start to feel like a stuffed pig. I'm trying to be patient but I do freak out about it. I'm still in my CG 24/7. I have a follow up with my PS on Monday so maybe I can get out of this thing then. I ran out of CortisilMDX so I've been using ScarAway silicone strips. I will see how they work for a month and then decide which one I like better. I bought some coobie bra and panty sets because I read so much about how comfy they are. And I do love them! My boobs are not settled fully yet so I have not been fitted for a regular bra. For now, it's just coobies. I went back to work 2 weeks ago. The first week was rough. My back was hurting from sitting down for so long and I had to take alot of breaks to get up and walk. Plus I was just exhausted. This past week was a little better. I was so nervous I would get bombarded with questions regarding why I was out and my different appearance from coworkers but that didn't happen. I have had some inquisitive looks but so what...I look fabulous. Lol. The two lines on the sides of my bellybutton are where I had a reaction to surgical tape that I bought and used to hold gauze in place post op for when I put bacitracin on it (that was a few weeks ago). Hopefully, the scars will go completely away. Other than that, still very pleased overall.
CG finally off!
Had my 2 month post op today and was cleared to resume normal activities but still listen to my body. I can burn my CG finally, too! No CG + 75 degree spring day=midriff exposure. I've only dreamed of wearing a crop top in public for the past 18 years. Now (even with swelling) I feel comfortable showing off a bit and I'm tickled pink about it. :)
I probably won't be posting anymore updates for awhile. Happy healing to all the ladies who've started the long journey of MM recovery and for those still in the decision phase: what are you waiting for?! XOXO
9 weeks post op & bra shopping
Seems like the girls have finally dropped and fluffed to some degree. My right side seems higher than the left so it may still have some settling to do. I couldn't wait to be able to bra shop. I sold all my 34B Victoria's Secret bras on ebay...I had quite a few and they were in great shape. So I've only been wearing coobie bras which are comfy but I'm tired of them. Went to Victoria's Secret today and bought two new bras for my twins: 36DD!!! :) I'll be honest: now that all the swelling in my boobs has gone down, I am beginning to think I should have went BIGGER!!!
Other than that, still swelling in my tummy area, worse in the afternoon and evening. It's driving me insane!! Clothes fit great though. Scars are healing pretty good. They are somewhat raised and reddish at the moment.
The first bikini I've ever worn!!! I'm so excited!
24 May 2015
3 months post
I'm doing fantastic. Boobs are fully in their pockets, it seems. I wish I had gone a bit bigger. It's funny to me that I used to think they were huge but now that all the swelling has gone down and they've descended, I find that they just look like average breasts and I want spectacular breasts. Lol @ my boob greed. Oh well. I'm not having any more cosmetic surgery anytime soon so they will just have to do for now. Scars are healing but I admit I'm not diligent about putting much on them besides my regular Nivea body lotion. I still have issues with swelling in my abdomen but it's improved significantly. Went bikini shopping recently. I was so excited to try on the different styles. For those in the Raleigh area, Swim n' Sport in Crabtree Mall is a great swimsuit store. I'm posting a picture of the one I purchased from there. Anyway, hope everyone is doing well! XOXO
Next week makes exactly 5 months post op
18 Jul 2015
5 months post
I'm a little ticked because I just wrote a long update on here and lost it somehow when I went to post. I will try to recap briefly.
Boobs: doing great. They feel and look real. Wish I had gone larger but I'm having fun with the girls and I'm happy with them either way.
Tummy: swelling?? I'm not sure if it's over. It's not bad like it used to be but I definitely see a difference when I first wake up in the morning vs. near bed time in the evening. Judge for yourself, I will attach pics. Also I have a slight bulge above my belly button. I think I need some upper abdominal lipo but my PS says I need to lose 5 pounds before my 6 month post op in September.
Weight: I weigh the exact same now as I did pre op. Considering I had a full TT with lipo of flanks, I guess I should be a few pounds lighter. My diet isn't bad but I admit I'm not as active as I should be. However, I am motivated to lose now with a very small, intimate wedding ceremony planned for late August. I have a wedding dress to look fabulous in! If anyone has a some tips, feel free to share. I'm trying not to spend money on the various diet plans out there. I really want to lose 10 pounds before my 38th birthday (August 27th).
Clothes: the old ones fit much better. Some of the shirts are too big now since I used to buy to hide my belly bulge. The new pieces I've bought are things I would have never even considered prior to surgery. My fiance likes taking me shopping so I can prance out of the dressing room and show him outfits. I admit just about everything I try on looks good and that makes me so happy!! :)
I wish I could add a little booty back there but I will try squats first. Lol. Us women are never satisfied...
Scars: well healed but fading veeerry slowly. I don't put anything on them and I should.
I hope everyone is happy and healing well. I will be back to update after my 6 month post op in September. XOXO
6 1/2 month update
11 Sep 2015
7 months post
So my PS office rescheduled my September 6 month followup (it was supposed to be this coming Monday) now it will be early next month. Anywho, I decided to do an update in the meantime:
My tummy seems like it's about done with swelling. I still have a slight bulge it seems in the area over my belly button. I can't wait to ask the PS about that. I have yo-yo'ed between 160 and 165 lbs since my surgery. I just haven't been diligent enough with a workout plan bUT my diet is pretty good. My scars are healing slowly and I still don't put anything on them besides my regular Nivea lotion. I'm satisfied with my boob job, although I still wish I would have gone a tad bigger. But I still like the additional volume the implants give me. They've really settled now, I kinda miss the perkiness of month 4-5. In other news, I got married. It was a very intimate courthouse ceremony but still special, nonetheless. I rented my wedding dress from a website called 'rent the runway'. They rent all kinds of designer clothes and accessories. I felt like a movie star in my outfit. :) I have a black tie gala to attend next month, and I can't wait to rent another dress from them. This new body really has me excited to wear clothes now; I feel like a Barbie doll. Lol. Anyway, hope everyone is doing well. Ta-ta for now.
11 Sep 2015
7 months post
Wanted to add more photos; had to crop first.
My "6 month" follow-up with PS
He said everything loops good. My weight is down to 161. I'm still numb from my BB down to the incision. He says it may take 2 years for the sensation to come back. Otherwise all is well. He took pictures of how I look now in comparison to how I looked pre-surgery. I'm pleased. No complaints and no regrets!
Quick update and pic
9 Dec 2015
10 months post
All is well. Nothing significant to report. I feel like by month 6 or 7 I was pretty much done with any noticeable changes. Still wish my tummy was a little flatter because I tend to bloat so much prior to my period. That part sucks!!! But I'm happy overall. I get compliments at work from women who don't know I've had surgery. One lady asked me what was my secret because I look like I've never carried kids. I thanked her but didn't tell her I'm surgically enhanced...I felt a little guilty for some reason. Anyway, I will continue brief updates on here until I reach the year mark.