3 children C-Sections ,5'2, 146lbs, lost 95lbs, TT W/MR and BA with Sientra 545cc Gummies DONE!!

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This has been something I have wanted for over 8...

This has been something I have wanted for over 8 years. I am a single mother to 3 children 16, 13 and 6 and not to mention I held onto 91 additional pounds after the pregnancies. It took me 3 years to loose it with motivation from a separation and after 8 years of working hard to maintain it's time! I'm excited and ready to take care of Me. Money will come and go but loving yourself is priceless.

Pre-Op Appointment set!!

My pre-op is scheduled for 7-23. I am beyond excited. Started looking for a recliner today and some good zip front sports bras. After 8 years of being ashamed and embarrassed about my body It's actually starting to finally feel real. I'm going to get a TT without muscle tightening And a Gel 375cc BA. Work had approved my vacation time for 2 full weeks. EXCITED ^_^

Supplies CHECK!!!

Day to day it's getting more real... I'm working out daily and having 2 protein shake meal replacements. Lean 25 from GNC. I lost 6lbs last week so I'm extremely motivated now!! Today I bought all of my supplies:
Gauze Pads, mederma scar gel, paper tape, cotton panties, coconut water, apricot nectar juice, vitamedica pre and post surgery vitamins with bromelian and arnica, a 3 drawer cart on wheels with everything in it, milk of magnesia, tylenol, baby wipes, bio oil, tissues, barf bucket, 3 zip front nightgowns, 2 zip front sports bras, heating pad, Ice packs, pillows,
Besides the recliner, I still feel like I am missing something? Pre-Op in 15 days!!! I'm more ready now then I'll ever be!!

Unexpected Curve Ball-----Now Im worried

Hi Ladies,
Well I have been on my period for over a month and a half spotting here and there to full flowing. I had to go to the urgent care clinic yesterday because I felt terrible and had been running a fever then she tells me they suspect I had a miscarriage and that I may still have some tissue in there that is infected. They sent me home with some antibiotics and some Misprostol pills that will force me to clean out. If that doesn't work within a week I will have to have a DNC. I took the pills yesterday and I haven't had any cramping just light spotting. I am torn emotionally and worried about my TT. My pre-Op appointment is Wednesday and I have no idea if or how this will affect it. I physically feel great. I don't know why this has happened. I spent the last 3 years going back and forth wasting time with a man I knew I would never be with and never once have an accident then when I decide to cut if off for good this happens and then it happens 3 months later?? Im so confused. Everything happens for a reason and I personally am taking it as complete closure with that relationship. HOWEVER, do you think this will affect my Pre-OP? And when will I have to have all of my blood work done before the operation? The pregnancy test they gave me yesterday was the faintest line so the hormone levels are definitely at the lowest. Should I share this info during my Pre-Op? Im scared because I don't want to postpone this, so a part of me feels like I should not mention it. I have purchased the plane tickets for my mother and got the time off work approved. Everything is set and ready. I do NOT know what to do. Honesty is the best policy and Im a firm believer of that but this could ruin everything I have planned.

On a positive note, I thought I would add that you can rent a beautiful electric over stuffed recliner from Rent-A-Center for $19.99 a week they will deliver and pick up. There is a minimum of 4 weeks. I thought that was reasonable since there is no reason I would need a recliner after this operation.

thank you for all your support.. I would be lost without this website and being able to vent on something so private!

Pre-Op tomorrow!!! Woo hoo

In fully ready with all my questions and concerns written down. I feel like a 5 year old waiting for Disneyland! It's just not getting here fast enough! I've been feeling good the past couple of days. No more bleeding or fevers from the misscarriage and my energy levels are back to normal. I'm going to let them know what is going on and leave the rest In gods hands. Will update as soon and I'm done tomorrow afternoon. YAY!!

Pre-Op Done and PAID IN FULL!

Hah hay!! I had the pre-op appointment today and did the lab work, paperwork, got prescriptions and instructions, antibacterial soap and lots of answers!. I let her know about the miss-carriage and there is a chance my Sx could be postponed (double thumbs down) The anesthesiologist will not give me anything if there is still HCG present and I will get the test the day of surgery, so literally I could be gowned Up ready to go and be sent packing!. She also said there is a higher risk for clotting because of the HCG which doesn't make sense to me?? I've had c-sections LOADED full term pregnancies that had to have plenty of HCG ... So anywhooo, Super bummer but I'm not letting it get me down I'm leaving it in gods hands and going forward. I'm healthy and active and take good care of this temple so I'm trusting it will take care of me and ditch that hcg!. She is testing the levels with the rest of the labwork as well just so we know where it's at. She asked that I have a full physical done by a family Dr. And make a final visit to OB to make sure there is no tissue left. Other then that I'm still indecisive about the boobs!! OMG THIS ALL I CAN THINK OF IS BOOBS!!! I tried on again the 350, 375 and 400. Photos below. I love the 400 but my daughter says I'm going overboard, she's almost 17 so I asked her opinion. ;) they are mentor Mod+ And I just stuffed them in my current padded B bra. Can you guys help!! Oh and I was able to buy a used recliner off Craigslist for $40 today there's a picture of it. I figure I can sell it afterwards if I don't need it and get my money back vs renting ^_^ this was my mindset after forking over $12,365!! Hahhaha! Hope everything had a wonder healing day or day of waiting ...

A phone call I wish never came

The SX is postponed. Right now she has the take me off the calendar to open the time slot for someone because my hormones are in the 1600's and they cannot operate unless they are under 300. She said she will do it Friday 8/15 on her day off if there is a miracle and the levels go down. I'm sad, depressed crushed and heartbroken all lumped up. So I made a decision to REPLAN and not wait for miracles. I will plan around my companies end of the year shutdown and hope for the SX On 12-18. By that time my body should be completely healed from the mis-carriage. I have an appointment Saturday for another ultrasound and they may decide to give me the D&C. The PS said if that happens and even if my HCG is low it's too risky and better to wait 8 weeks to heal. A D&C is a surgery she said and it could affect my healing and cause infection .. So that was my cup of tea, no honey, no sugar, no heat all bitter n gross. I went and had a full mani/pedi for lunch with a massage since I've been saving every dime. It made me feel better so I'm going to keep my head high and count the days to December now. I have everything possible ready to go so I will need to find a good book to read. This has consumed me so much that I feel so lost now :(

Can we say emo roller coaster??

So about an hour and a half after I accepted that I need to reschedule and started re-planning my SX for the last 2 wks of the year I decided to call my OB and make arrangements for a D&C. She said sometimes this can drag for weeks and as long as I'm not showing any signs of infection I am ok. She also mentioned massaging my lower abdomen to help workout any tissues causing this hormone spike. Well no more that 30 minutes after I began cramping and passed some tissue. (TMI) and I'm 100% positive it's what we saw with te ultrasound last Saturday. And being that I feel fine, I'm healthy active and feels the best ever I called the PS back and requested she keeps my spot on her schedule and to request another hormone rest for Monday AND if there is no change in the levels then a postponement to December is what it will be. But if they lower I want to go forward and SHE AGREED!! So Tuesday I will know for sure one way or the other. But ultimately I know my body better than anyone and consider myself extremely cautious and if I feel doubt or fear I won't do something. This I feel completely prepared for mind body and soul. And t was a long process I didn't just wake up and decide on it! Sacrifice baby!! Come on body let's do this!!! get rid of that HCG!

The waiting game

This day is dragging!! Saturday I had my OB appointment and confirmed I do not need a D&C I have a clear check from her to proceed. All new tissue has regenerated and I have it in writing. I went today to take another HCG test for the PS. Waiting for the results tomorrow. I've spent hours praying, working out and running the last few days to keep my mind off this! Hormones are just out of our control. All of my excitement and planning has been put on hold and I'm left with this big empty space. I'll be happy to get the answer tomorrow morning either way :) to plan for 14 days or for December!


Ok a lot has happened in the last week. I played the waiting game with my PS well actually the nurses since the PS is on vacation until 8/4. I Initiated numerous calls was promised a callback and after hours called them back again. Lost sleep and appetite and stressed myself out to the max. My hormone levels did drop from 1660 to 580 and the PS said if they drop we will proceed last week. BUT then she wanted to talk to the OB and get clearance. While I was at my OB appointment last Saturday I requested a letter from them to provide my PS that clearly states patient is approved for further tummy tuck surgery. I shared my story with the OB dr :) I offered to fax it to the PS office but it wasn't acceptable, she wanted to talk to them herself. I felt like she didn't trust me and I felt insignificant and unimportant last week when she told I have to be postponed and other patients want to have their surgery, and A day after I paid in FULL, just didn't seem fair. Then the whole going back and forth trying to get answers I decided to cancel, get a full refund and go to Michael Workman in Vancouver WA. He was my original choice but because of distance and cost I chose the other PS. I emailed Dr. Workman and let him know I was thinking about having the SX in August and was wondering if he was having the summer specials he told me about during my consultation last FEB. And guess what his response was....... 12K ($365 cheaper now) and he had an opening on 8/12 the same day I was originally scheduled. It felt like it was meant to be. I then asked him if he has a minute to discuss my situation over the phone, he said please call. I told him my situation and he said to bring the letter and should HCG still be present it would not have no interference with the SX. He assured me that everything would be fine. My home test have been negative since Tuesday 7/29. My Pre-Op is scheduled Wednesday 8/6. The house is back on track. My head is clear. And I am sleeping well. And back on my exercise routine. Everything fell apart to fall into something better. I cannot WAIT for this! But now that everything is rolling and the time is getting closer I can say I am getting nervous. I look at my belly every morning as Im straightening my hair in a panty and bra and say.... will I miss you? NO Is it worth the pain to get rid of you? I think so YES! but the unknown is always a little scary. Even though I have read hundreds of reviews to prepare myself I still feel the nerves. If anyone knows how to update the Dr. Please let me know. Thank you all for being here for me..

Pre-Op #2 today!

5 days to go and counting, and I lost a few lbs!! Down to 146!! I'm like a child waiting for Disneyland and a Mother they few days before the baby arrives, cooking cleaning, working out and full of excitement. I have my pre-op with Dr Workman today at 330pm. I want to take my time trying on the sizers and really feel good about the size I choose. I've had so many different opinions and I can't make up my mind! One part of me wants to go moderate so no one will notice at work and so they are easy to tie down for running --250-300cc range and the other part of me wants those nice full c breasts I had while breast feeding 350-400cc range..I'm thinking that since I'm paying the same price For all sizes I might as well go for the 400cc. I've also read under the muscle makes them a bit smaller after healing and swelling? Arrrrgh. decisions decisions! Stay tuned beautiful ladies...

Pre- Op Done, Boobs Chose and All Paid!!

Ok beautifuls, I chose my boobies yesterday. Sientra (gummy bear) Cohesive Gel 545cc classic round. The PS explained that the width of my current breast pocket is almost 9" wide and that it would fit in there comfortably without bulging out like massive ones. They aren't high profile so it will be an good fit. I want to go natural looking big LOL I could barely sleep last night. I can imagine what Monday night is going to be like. The PS went over everything with me showed me the drain and explained how itll work. all the instructions, No Labs though? I already have them but I thought I would have to do them again. And everyone is right Each PS has different requirement PRE and POST. I don't have to do the 2 days liquid PRE with him. I will be drinking a bottle of magnesium citrate (over the counter) to clean me out within 2 hours and no eating or drinking 8 hours before.
I was prescribed the following medications:
Cipro- Antiobiotic to take for 6 weeks
Scopalamine Patch- Apply the night before for nausea
Vistaril- To take with pain med for anxiety, nausea, nervousness
Percoset- Pain
Soma- Muscle Relaxer

I may go ahead and fill the prescriptions I was given by the first PS as well for the morphine and valium just in case I have some reactions or something unforeseen. I don't take any medications and Im ANTI but I definitely want to be prepared should I need them! I opted NOT to have the plication (ab stitching) of the stomach muscles and I am wondering if I should just go ahead and have it done. I have worked so hard for these solid stomach muscles but then again I cannot tell what my stomach will look like without all this skin in front. I pull it and try to flatten it out the best I can but I still cannot be sure. What do you guys think? Should I go ahead and have him sew them for the best flattest results? What would you do?

Oh these nerves... Keep calm!!

I woke up this morning feeling nervous as ever. I even wanted to make sure I call all my siblings and family to say hi and tell them I loved them yesterday they don't all know about it. But just calling to say hi felt good. I think I have cleaned and prepped as much as i could. I'm a planner as a career and run the house with the same methods pretty much. I precut all the veggies in individual bags, grated the cheese, cooked some pasta, boiled eggs. Tried to make it as easy on my mom as possible. I got my hair done, lightened the color :) Today I will begin juicing, shave the goodies, remove all my nail polish, pluck my eyebrows and pack a small bag for the trip. All this preparation is coming down to this single point! This past 8 months started off as a snail crawl and time has come and gone fast. I remember my countdown was 194 days I felt like it would take forever and it's almost here. Tomorrow I'm going to call and add the muscle plication back on as well it's $400 no big deal.. I do want the best results. Thank u girls for recommendations. I'm going to spend today relaxing with the kids by the river. Enjoy my long hot showers, and fix my hair and makeup since I won't be dealing with that for a couple of weeks and choose a book to start reading. Mom will fly in tomorrow at noon so I'll spend time showing her my beautiful forest in Oregon.. Hope you all are healing well!! So glad I have you to talk to :)

Pre Surgery Preparation

Spent the majority of today wrapping up the final things before tomorrow morning. Packed a bag. Included crackers and coconut water for afterwards. Gave my mom detailed instruction for dinners, protein shakes and after care. Directions for today were to start bowel preparation which entails an entire 10oz bottle of lemon flavor magnesium citrate. Well..... It's been 30 minutes and I'm having a hell of a time drinking it!!!! Bleeeeech I think it would have been better to be on liquid diet for 2 days. And to shave 3" above the VJ, take a Celebrex and drink lots of water up until midnight....I am so excited for tomorrow I can barely stand it... It's going to be a painful few days but so worth every pain and penny!

Today's the Day!!

I can't sleep so I thought I'd write... The Magnesium Citrate took me 2 bottles vs just one and it didn't hit me until after I went to bed around 10pm perfect timing right. That stuff has got to be harsh on your system. Literally expect to be a water faucet if you have to drink that. I also forgot to take my Celebrex and put the nausea patch behind my ear so at 3am I did those, hopefully they will be good by the time I go. Remember to pack a bag when you go. Take some crackers and coconut water, a robe in case you don't want to get dressed, a blanket and a bucket oh and 2 pairs of panties!! The comfortable cotton ones for after and the cute ones to wear there to show the Dr. Where you want your scar!!. My last meal was at 330 yesterday and that was all I ate all day. No appetite at all. I called and added the plication of the muscles yesterday. She only charged me another $300. The recovery will take longer but my tummy will be flatter. My gap is a little less than and inch apart and I could imagine it looking funny when I do a sit up without all this skin there so I went with it.. They look like two poles trying to escape my stomach. Ok well I'm going to workout one last time and shower up!!! This is real deal Holyfield!! Thank you to all the women here on this site. You guy have been my emotional walls and have prepared me for this emotionally and mentally.. To took care of the financial and physical part but without you I probably would have backed out another year!! Lots of love---

Saying goodbye!!

I'm here at the surgery center waiting to go in at 930.. I'm thirsty and tired from being up and down all night. My moms having a Dutch bro's coffee and every time she takes a sip she says mmmmm. It's driving me NUTS. The smell is insanely good as well.. Ok well here I go!! See you all in the flat side... One last goodbye to my old body

It has been done!!

Sorry in advance for typos.
My eyes are blurry. I got there to the office around 915 where they took mw right back.. Had all my vitals checked, undressed into a hospital gown and off I went. The last think I remember was the anesthesiologist telling me I wil be tired soon. Then I woke up and it was done!! My pain is about a 4 out of 10, well I'm getting sleepiy! The pain pills me me sleep alot.

Burning sensation??

Is the burning sensation on the stomach normal? It feels like fire but I have no fever or other symptoms . Could it be the nerves re-attaching? I haven't read anything about it on here so I'm curious if u ladies have felt that??

Updates POD2

Its been 2 days post op already. I have been keeping up on the percoset every 4-5 hours and have taken 2 muscle relaxers. haven't had much of an appetite. Just lots of fluids and a jello and this morning I had some greek yogurt with rhubarb preserves and almond slivers, Im really glad I bought all of the Bolthouse juice smoothies, they are refreshing and easy. Sleeping patterns consist of roughly 45-60 minutes a session unless I take the Soma muscle relaxer. I slept 5 full hours last night. I try to get up and walk every time I take my pain medication at least 30-50 steps. The nurse told me yesterday that I may be walking to much because I am only swollen on the left side. Drain outage is 20-30ml for each side every 8 hours and has gone from dark red to light red, they want it to be the lightest red and only 10-15ml for each side before they remove them. they haven't bothered me at all. I haven't had a BM or any gas. My stomach feels bloated and swollen and I can hear it making all kinds of noise so hopefully soon it finds its way to exit soon!. I have no pain in my boobs at all. The nurse wants me to keep my arms at my sides at all times and move like a T-Rex. I find myself trying to use my arms to lift myself etc because literally I feel like I have no core power. My blurry eyesight is gone and it was from the Scop patch I had behind my ear for nausea. Within 20 minutes of removing it I could see! I think the hardest part of this process is sitting all day and the discomfort from being bloated and swollen. There is also the burning sensation right under my left breast. Its tender and feels like its on fire, since im wrapped I cannot tell if its swelling or not. Everything is just super tight.. I have another post op check up tomorrow and they will replace my bandages again for the TT and remove the foam breast wraps and Ill be in a sports bra. I cannot wait to see how they look. Hope everyone is healing well!!

I love my boobs!!

First look at them and they are doing so well. Minimal swelling and dropping right into place! Thank god I went with my gut instinct vs other peoples opinions..

Woah boy!!

Today I took a lovely sponge bath and my mom washed my hair. The foam tape they put on me post op left a residue all over my body and it's a pain to get it all off in still struggling to remove it all! It felt so good to have the warm water on my skin. The burning sensations is less but still there in the same spot. I blow dried and straightened my hair and even put on some make up, my mom also painted my toenails bright red. I feel so womanly today!! An actual human lol. Today I drove for the first time. Took my mom to the airport. It was a 40 minute drive home. I am extremely exhausted. You would think I ran a marathon and haven't slept for a week by how tired I am!! Even getting ready this morning was a chore and a half, after I got ready I took a nap!. I did notice that I am standing a bit straighter today and the fluid in my drains is light yellow vs bloody red. I think they can come out sooner than Friday. The nurse said they come out when the fluid is clear... I'm on my own now with just the boys and I and they are taking such good care of me.. I had to cough earlier and I think I'd rather have a fingernail pulled off with pliers!! That was excruciating and there was no way around it! The PS said he gave me double plication?? What does that mean? I am tight as tight could be. Gas bubbles hurt too and I can feel them moving around in there... They hurt when in there and they hurt to try and push them out! I highly recommend gas X strips. Well I'm off back to sleep.. Lots of love to everyone. I'll post some photos of my flatness soon too. I look down and can't believe this is mine. Big boobs and a flat belly. I need a pinch this doesn't feel real yet!!!!

Semi straight pics.. I have woman boobs!!!!

This is about as straight as I can stand. My bb is still a raw hole. I gagged when I took the tape off so I put some triple antibiotic in it and re taped it.. The poor thing needs some help. 4 days and my boobs r falling into place already. I thought they would feel fake but they are squishy. I love them and take a peek every chance I can. :)

I slept in my big girl bed!!

Last night I slept in my bed almost straight. I had 2 pillows for a small prop. I slept excellent probably because I went against the rules and took a nice hot shower before I went to bed!!! I faced away from the running water and did my best to keep the bandages dry. It relieved the aches in my back and felt amazing. Getting out of bed this morning took some skill though! I had to grasp the back of my knees and slowly lift up to get out because turning to my side hurt. I've been using my knees for getting off the couch and recliner as well.. The fluid from the drains is light yellow and about 10ml every 12 hours. When I'm on my feet more throughout the day it goes up to 20ml. I'll be happy when they come out. The boys and I are doing good on our own. I cooked dinner last night- fajitas and my 13 yr old cut all the veggies and helped, I sat down in between stirring the meat to rest and it worked out perfect. They have been so good. I wish I had the strength to take them to the movies or out of this house for a few hours. But everything is such a chore for me. I get tired from just thinking alone!!! Lol they both understand though and don't asked for anything, they are so good to me . Hard to believe I go back to work this Friday already. It took me almost a year to plan for something that came and gone in the blink of an eye!! Tomorrow will be 1 week! I'm looking forward to being drainless, standing straight and going braless!!

One week down!

Today is a week! It seems to have flew by, I honestly slept through half of it. I woke up this morning and did what I have done everyday for the last 6 days. Unwrapped my binder and made sure it was still real and not just a dream, I inspected every inch to make sure I don't see anything out of place or red, but something this morning was different. I started crying when I unwrapped myself and stood in front of the mirror staring at how I now look, this whole experience has changed me as a woman on the outside as well as the inside. I prepared and dedicated myself for over 8 years, from learning to love me, working out faithfully, watching all of my calories and never giving up even though my image in the mirror daily was something that looked like didn't belong to me.... but It never crossed my mind to prepare for how I would feel afterwards. I feel beyond humbled by being blessed enough to have the resources, trusting in my PS an accredited man yes but a complete stranger to me, the physical health and determination to have this done, and to my close network of supportive women through the years that have supported and helped push the baby steps I took to leave an abusive relationship and the trials of finding who I was while trying to raise 3 children alone, and to this website of amazing women that helped me prepare the final touches for this journey. It literally broke me down to pure gratefulness for it all. I appreciate everyone one of you for sharing your most private stories and photos. And Im so happy I have somewhere to come and speak freely of something that I have kept hidden for so long. BIG XO to you all..

with that being said. I changed the tape on my breasts today and put on the scar away silicone tape. The scar seems rather large to me. Its about 4" wide they are flat for the most part but On my right breast though I notice at the beginning of the scar is a hard little knot. Not sure if that is a stitch underneath it or just the way it is healing. But Im going to keep at eye on it, that little booger looks like it would be the perfect candidate to poke through and cause me some pain. I slept flat on my back last night. It was harder then a 2 hour cardio session without a break to get up. I tried to grab my knees and pull up NO LUCK, I tried rolling to my side smashed my beauties, that didn't work. I had to take breaks in between and almost gave up and laid in bed for awhile till one of the boys got up to give me a push then I finally got it by grabbing the back of my knee with my left hand and propping myself on my right elbow and swinging my right leg... WHEW it was work. I feel good today, a little more energy. 3rd day without any pain medication. My bowels are happy and back on their normal schedule.. I stepped on the scale this morning and weighed 155.6...9lb gain but I was prepared for that.. I was a size 22 years ago I can deal with 10 lbs no problem!. My tummy is still puffy on the left side and the same spot has the burning and tingling sensation throughout the day. Its weird that its just in that single spot and not all over my stomach. The muscle there spasms as well and just feels like it wont stretch without a fight with me. Ive tried to massage it and see if I can feel anything weird but I don't notice anything. Its also on the same side that the drain has continuously since day 1 output more fluid.... It needs to join the program here!! I also noticed more than usual hair falling out. Has anyone noticed that? I just got those highlights so it could be from that but you never know. Well I hope everyone is having a beautiful day. Its 84 here in Portland and its beautiful outside. Do I dare go for a little walk? I would love to get some vitamin D, fresh air and a change of scenery, but I don't know if Im ready for all that... I love my house don't get me wrong but Im just getting sick of it... cabin fever!!!

Goodbye chicken cutlets!!!

Found these bra inserts in my purse AKA chicken cutlets as my children called them when they fell from my bra one day... I was so happy to throw them in the garbage!!!! Farewell!! I no longer need bra filler lol!!!

36A to 36DD

I made it to the mall today and hit VS for a cheetah print sports bra that I wanted along with some of the wide waistband yoga pants. I can't wait to workout in nothing but the bra and the pants lol it's always been something I silently said "hey if I had the body I'd do it too" every time I would see a girl in the gym wearing that.. Well anyways She measured me in my current sports bra at a 36DD! I couldn't believe it. It not that I'm not happy but my target size was a full C lol!! Now they better not be swollen either that would be a tease. I like them just this way! Hahah so here are some pics of the sports bras. Super comfy no wires and breathable material.

I spent most of the day up cleaning and on my feet. A couple coworkers came over and brought lunch and called me bionic woman since they were expecting me to be bed ridden and looking like hell lol. I had my hair done and make up too. I felt good this morning full of energy. Went all day without a nap. Hit the mall then a full deluxe pedi.. I may have dozed a little for that one but I made a full day without laying around. I called and talked to the PS nurse she wants me to come in tomorrow at 1 to remove my drains so I really wanted to push myself today to see what I drain... I may be crazy and request to keep them in for a few more days... I don't want that fluid buildup inside of me. Could I be insane or what? I wanted them out so bad now I think it won't hurt to leave them in. I've been researching lymphatic manual massage for drainage and the reason why we swell and those drains are helping even if it's 20cc in a 24 hour period. Those drain channels are the last things to repair through this process and it could take a year!! I seem to swell so easy. I start feeling like a marshmallow. No waistline or anything what's up with that I worked the hell out of my obliques to have some curves and they just disappear!! So I'll make a decision tomorrow morning when I measure the drains. I might just continue to manual massage the fluid out. Hope all you girls had a great day... I'm just sitting down to go through all the posts :) I love this website it's my highlight daily :) xo

My drains are out!

Today has been a very long day. Its 8:40PM and it feels like I have just sat down. I had a Dr Appt at 1:00 and it took me 4 hours to get ready. I have had this knot in the left side of my stomach since POD1 and it has continuously sent burning sensations and shocks and spasms out but this morning was the worst. I wouldn't give in and I couldn't take a muscle relaxer because of the 40 minute drive to the PS. I laid on my back and tried to lightly massage it out. I can clearly feel something in there that didn't feel like anywhere else on my abdomen.. It was knotted and wouldn't stop shocking me. And the same side turned blood red fluid in the drain and drained double. It has been double the other side since day one. And that is the side that is swelling alot too. So to get ready was a chore and a half. I had to take breaks between fixing my hair, getting dressed, everything So when I got to my the PS office I was exhausted, irritated and done already. I haven't seem my PS or spoke to him since SX day ive been talking with his right hand nurse. She first thought she would remove just the right hand side since its draining almost clear and less that 10ml in a 24 hour period and then would leave in the left side for another 4 days until Monday. I then told her my concerns about the constant nagging shocks and burning sensations and spasms in the same lemon shape spot since the day after surgery. I told her I massaged it and felt something odd like a twisted muscle and that I really wanted to talk to the PS about it. We couldn't get a hold of the PS as he was getting prepared for another surgery, Thursday is normal surgery day but she wanted to see me for a quickie.. She said well anything under 20ml we could remove the drain which this was was just at 20ml and she asked me what I wanted to do, I said do you think the drain could be the culprit causing the pain and she said 'you know I thought that too but I couldn't be sure"...... so I said take it out. The right side slid out like a knife in butter. but the left side when she went to pull it out was stuck. It had to be gently tugged and worked out. My body was trying to heal around that thing!!! As soon as it came out I had INSTANT relief of that area. No pressure, no tugging no burning no tingly sharp pain, spasms, NOTHING They instantly disappeared. it was the best feeling of pressure and relief EVER. I am so happy that I have massaged and inspected my body and have spent so much time getting to know feelings and listening to it. I knew something wasn't right the second day. But what the hell do I know I never had this operation. But Im logical. Ok so you removed the entire skin, its lifted cut shifted and re-attached, but only a small lemon shape zone is doing this. WHY, Why not the whole thing or multiple areas.. was something cut in error? was there a stich placed there. Im like why. why why. I don't claim to know everything when it comes to the medical field by far but there is one thing I know more than and Dr. and that is my own body... Sorry. I have to be stubborn about this. If you ladies feel something isn't right. Be persistent. Ask. Research and don't take a brush off it is normal procedure and this is what to expect when they cannot explain in clear detail at to why. If its general and vague answers dig for details. Ok burning sensations are nerve ending reattaching Ok. Swelling is due to lymphatic drain channels being cut OK. Swelling moves here and there because its fluid and does what it wants OK. I can get it. My body is so systematic like clockwork. Eating clean has completely changed the way It functions, responds and reacts. And I have in turn changed how I listen to those.. So listen to your body first!! With that I am going to bed. LOL Im and done with today. XO lots of love and blessings to the waiters and healers I have missed you all today.

POD11 one day closer to sexy!

Yesterday was my first day back to work! You would think a storm came through my room. The hardest part of getting ready was trying to find something to wear. I have stuff thrown all over my room but I'm not going to lie I do that on normal days too! I just ain't cleaning it right away this time. Everyone was so happy to have me back. I had a bunch of things waiting for me, presents and work wise lol I was up and down a lot for the bathroom that was quite a walk away.....the production floor employees were so concerned with my hunched wobble.. They are so used to seeing me speed walk with a big smile saying good morning to every face I saw..I was just determined to gt to the bathroom head down and focused .. It's near impossible for me to lie so when they asked with worried concern if I am ok, what happened to me and if I need help I kindly declined and said i had a tummy repair. I worked 7-3 what was intended to be a half day turned into a full day, that's me push push push a little more is ok a little more. I did do mostly sitting but by 3 I was starting to hurt and feel bloated and swollen even my feet looked swollen. And its such an embarrassing thing but I swear I fart more now and I just needed to get home for that single reason alone. It's got to be my protein shakes. I was becoming a human hot air balloon. I came home and off my feet I went for the rest of the night. I ordered the boys dominos and it was a wrap! This morning I woke up sore, not in pain but tender and sore. I got up to weigh and unwrap my binder and massage myself, my morning rituals. Weighed in at 152... Slowly coming off YAY!! The swelling was gone for the most part but I feel fluid around my knee caps, they are aching a bit. My fingers are tight and swollen and I can see bruising on my left side and that the scar appears to be sunk into my skin I can only pray it's swelling too but it hasn't changed much from POD1 :( the right side is so flat and smooth it makes my left side jealous. I peeled the tape back so it prevents it from digging in and gently massaged the incision site to help with softening the scar tissue.I hope the overhang that's there smoothes some to match the other side. Since the drains were removed I am hunching again. That tug to remove it from the left side made it so tender and it throbs. And now bruising on the left hip it's dark blue like it's brand new. This left side is my tick. Plan B should that side not agree with conformity----the panties can cover that area and instead of a string bikini it'll be a little thicker sides . Whoop teee dooo. Better than what I had!! Right!! I tried on some bikini's I bought from the clearance rack a year ago this AM too. I have never in my adult life wore a bikini or showed my torso. So this is a dream come true, I know it seems so insignificant but ive always saw myself wanting to layout in a badass bikini slathered in tanning oil.. With this SX done I feel like a model imperfections and all feel so perfect to me finally a body I accept as is feels amazing!! My 6 year old came upstairs and said Wow mommy now u can come swimming with us at the water park!! I said " YA baby does mommy look ok it this kind of bathing suit Tho?" And he said ya mommy u like a pretty mommy like that. When are we going to the water park today ?? Momma I can't wait to go swimming with u and u can ride on the slide with me now and he hugged my new waist... Lol I said No papa but soon.. ..mommy has to get better just a little bit more and then I promise we will.. Idk when summer here in Oregon ends as this is my first here, but I hope it lasts a little longer so I can take them even if I sit out. Or if we have to drive home to Cali and hit Santa Cruz that's what we will do! They deserve it so much!!! With trying on the suits and taking the pics then up and down the stairs a couple times for coffee I got dizzy, fuzzy eyes and immediate cold sweat and I panic everytime this happens making my breaths short then causing me to feel faint. I hurried and put a Cold washcloth over my head and got back into bed.. It's near 11am. I'm taking it easy this weekend. I haven't showered since Thursday and the drain sites are closed now so that is my only plans for today. Sending all my love, thought prayers and blessing to the waiters and the healers... Here's my morning peep show!

My 2 WPO Update. The good, bad and beautiful.

Today marks 2 weeks post op. Time is flying and things are going well for the most part. I have no complaints, I feel amazing and I love the way things are looking.

Here are the positive things happening this past week.
-Back to work full-time Starting Day 9 and surviving the work day. Its an office Job and requires roughly 1200-1500 step during the day.
-Swelling is going down daily and maintenance includes feet up, butt down daily by 6PM no matter what.
-Energy levels are being maintained for longer time periods (I can survive without an afternoon nap)
-I am on a normal eating schedule. 6 small meals a day and weight is coming off. 147 PRE to 159 POST to 151 Current.
-I can suck in my tummy and 'semi' cough or clear my throat without excruciating pain. Still haven't had the opportunity to sneeze. thank you jesus :)
-My boobs are falling into place both at the same time. They are soft and fluffy and got a bit of bounce. They seem smaller as well so I am assuming the swelling is going away. I hope this is what they will be. If I had to guess I would say I lost a cup. DD to D
- The incisions at the breast creases are nice and flat. The bubbles (internal stitches) at the beginning have disappeared, The lines are very thin and I doubt I will see the scar in a year.....

Here are some things that concerned me that have happened:
-My left side incision has opened up at the very end. It happens to land directly on the bone and its sore and painfully sensitive and as soon as it closes it opens again because the crease of my clothing it right near it and when I sit down I can feel it. The blood that comes out is brown and old. Its not a lot but its not the normal looking red blood. No sign of warmth or ooze or any redness. The swelling I do have is pretty much isolated to this part of the incision. I am still taking antibiotics as I was prescribed 26 days worth.
-The left side isn't smooth and completely flat on the incision like the right side. And I suspect it will have the dog ear but I am hoping for the best.
I plan to call the PS Nurse today and let her know what is going on because my next Appt is not until 9/19
-Bruising is just now showing up. I began putting the Arnica Salve on them today. I also rubbed it across my ribs as they are sore from being bound.
-My belly button appears to have a small opening near the bottom that cannot decide on what it wants to do. Again so sign of infection. Its a small slit that has already begun healing closed again.

That's about it! Besides that, I am slowly increasing my steps per day. I wear an UP band on my wrist that counts the steps, calories and sleeping patterns and each day is improvement. I wake up once a night now for a potty break and my steps have increased from 200 a day since 1st DPO to 3500 now. Each day is roughly increased by 200-300 steps. This weekend is a 3 day weekend and I'm looking for somewhere special to take my boys where I can gt minimal activity and let them have fun also keeping it affordable.. School starts the following Tuesday so its a perfect way to end the summer. I hope everyone is having a beautiful week!

2WPO pics


No swelling today!! 16DPO

This week flew by and honestly Monday I wasn't so sure I'd make it. It was taking me 2 hours to get ready in the morning now I've improved to an hour! I am looking forward to this 3 day weekend. I'm thinking of taking to boys to the Oregon coastline. We haven't seen it yet and they could run and play while I sit and watch! So not much swelling today.... The difference? 4 liters of water most likely. My energy levels are pretty high, great mood and I feel like I could accomplish a lot BUT don't let them fool you!!! Im keeping the routine, light work, off my feet and in my recliner by 6.. It's boring for now but it's such a small period of time to sacrifice for feeling good when we see our reflection if you think of it in that perspectove. I couldnt be happier you all and for me :)


21 days of healing- Video!

Explicit - Click to view

Well I've hit my 3 week mark and I'm still going strong! Only complaint is my left incision ending pudge/shelf on the incision.. I have steady energy and swelling has been minimal. My water intake is ridiculous 4 liters and I owe my swelling disappearance to that!. I know it can come and go as it pleases so I'm still taking it fairly easy and drinking more than my dear bladder can handle. Keep in mind though that I am a single parent and stuff just has to be done so things are slowly getting back to normal!! The boys started school today it was pretty eventful. One started highschool at 750am and the other at 9am I dnt know why they just can't make it easier on parents and keep it consistent with all the schools in a single district!
This 3 day weekend was perfect. It rained Saturday so we had a movie day and stuck close to home. Sunday we went shopping and got some last minute items for school and 2 VS bra's for me :), BBQ'd then Monday we went to the lake and the boys swam and fished!!! It was pure relaxation not to mention beautiful scenery! I read until I fell asleep.. I'm attempting to upload my first video from tonight. The pics were from this morning

New corset.

I got this today and I fought it to get it on... Seems like so much work in so much more simpler that this lol!!! Anyways it's fun and I wanted one but it's not FUNctional lol

No binder for bed

I tried to post this this morning but for some reason it didn't work!! I slept without my binder on last night thinking I would have a more comfortable sleep NOT. And woke up puffy and swollen on the left... I went to walmart today and got a flexees torso corset size medium $15. It could be tighter so TBD if I can last all day in it.. My body feels tight and achy today and I swear it's because I can't stretch in the mornings and no yoga. I miss waking up and stretching as far as I can... Hope everyone is enjoying their Saturday!!

CG Success

Ok here's the Maidenform
Flexees hook and eye corset size medium from walmart for less than $15!!! I slept in it all night and it's perfect!!!!

1 MONTH post today!

Looking back time is just flying by.. I'm still highly dependent on my medical binder and wearing it 24/7. When I don't I swell, ache and it pulls on my BB. The scars are lightening as well.. I'll post another video tonight of them. I didn't have much time this morning. I think it's safe to say I'm almost back to my normal lifestyle minus the gym. My energy is what it used to be and my food Intake is as well. My weight seems pretty stable now at 149lbs. I feel happier and sexy. Confident and a complete feeling if that makes sense. Before I felt so less than.. Even though I feel like this I'm still not jumping on the dating bandwagon. Not just yet. I think a complete season and I'll be ready by next summer. It's funny though how so many people are pushing it now and asking me if I found anyone?? I didn't know I was looking lol... I didn't do this for a man! PERIOD. Society thinks that if your alone there's something wrong with you. But that's not the case. I'd rather be alone then have someone hinder positive progress.. I learned that the hard way too and lost some years trying to "make it work" Anywhoooo some people will never get it! I feel super happy it's been a month PO, looking forward to the next month to pass just as quickly. Does anyone know when it's safe to take a bath? I miss my lavender baths
I'll post the bra videos too.. I'm slacking!! Have a beautiful Tuesday ladies!!

Victoria Secret Bras

Here are the bra videos ^_^

After BA Massage- Get Fluffy Boobs!!

How to massage your breasts after BA

Explicit - Click to view

Here's a video on how I massage myself 3-5 times a day since POD8 for 1 minute per side.. 4wks post and they are soft and fallen into place. Hope this helps Suzy ^_^ and anyone else curious too!!

Stitches stitches everywhere

That little stitch!!

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More stitch zones on incision

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Stitches are coming out the surgeons work!!!! This morning one was sticking out of my left breast so I pulled it and it unwound right out!!! Freaky then there's a sport that has been super sensitive and I can see a small pimple there and feel the top of the stitch sticking out. Ok that was yesterday morning... Then last night I get home because all I could think about was that thing I pulled from my body so I decided to do a complete investigation and as soon a so pulled my tape back from my incision there was that infamous scent.... Puss. And guess what! There's 2 stitches sticking out on my right side. My beautiful side I might add.. I gave them a slight pull no movement like my breast. Then I proceeded to gt the tweezers and pull. They are both attached to something so I pulled them as high and I could and clipped them down. I guess yesterday was my 30 days. 1MPO who the heck counts days I had the surgery on a Tuesday 3 Tuesdays later is 4 weeks right? I'll be calling the PS office this morning. Hopefully cutting them back wasn't a back thing but my line can't close with them sticking up. I guess the bath is out of the question for the time being! And what's up with dissolvable? I bet these stitches are the culprit for our openings and infections!!!! Id like a sample of the material so I can do some different tests. That thing was hard as a rock how the hell does it dissolve in me. And what's it made out of. What am I absorbing??. Lol this stuff just freaks me out! Obvi I dnt trust medical right? but I have good reason. When I was over weight I had so many health problems they just gave me medication instead of putting me on a weight loss therapy program. Medication seems to be the answer for everything.. Anyways I can't rant forever about this it gets me heated and it's too early do all that!!! Hope u girls have a happy Friday!!

Boob stitch video

Corset short cut video

Making putting in your corset a bit easier!

Explicit - Click to view

I can come to find that all CG no matter what material or strength take a great deal of stamina to put on and take off lol!! Here's a video on a shortcut for putting on your corset.

My skin loves these

Hair skin and nail solutions

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Hey girls!!! Here is what using for my skin hair and nails and if your are following my journey u know my hair was falling out and I'm I've never been able to grow nails!!! Enjoy hearts

Well Hello Swell!!!

Swell here swell there not so swell

Explicit - Click to view

Good morning ladies!!!

The aftermath of the weekend has left me so swollen and uncomfortable. I feel like a cow. My waist is 29" a whole inch increase!! I gained 2lbs. Then adding to it started my period so it's probably a combination of both. And I'm extremely emotional too. I went out for the first time Saturday night, had 2 glasses of wine and was standing until about 1130pm though it was fun I felt uncomfortable all of yesterday and still this morning :( my fingers are swollen too, I'm at a point where a little bit of fun isn't worth it for now. Today would be a great day to play hookie but off to work I go. If I still feel terrible I may leave early!! Beyond seeing my swollen body and being barely able to bring from compression. There's a huge fire here in Oregon and we need to avoid going outside due to air quality. The sky is orange and grey. Ash is everywhere. It's heartbreaking and I hope it goes out soon. Hope everyone had a good weekend!!!


Ok this swelling has to rhyme or reason. It's comes and goes as it pleases for no common reason. There's no special way to make it leave you just have to look past it and patiently wait for it to do its thing.. Today I was emotional for random reasons. Missing family and friends from the Bay Area, missing being in love, and feeling so sad about the fire I smelled all day.. So I signed up for a German class that starts tomorrow and got myself all pumped up for something new. I decided I'm going to plan for Germany next summer. It's so much easier to work hard day in and out when you have a goal to meet.. This surgery has been such a large part of my focus for the last few years and it's done now I need to get going on the next life experience. TRAVEL!!!

For you chicklet

Scars at 35 DPO

I'm pretty sure the stitch I snipped back is trying to come back :( I can't wait for my appointment Friday. I just want them to look over everything. My left hip scar isn't flush it looks like a 4 year old cut the skin and it's sore and irritable. I almost need a pillow padded bandage for it. Does anyone have any ideas for protecting such a sensitive wide open spot?

Mis-adventure but and adventure nonetheless!

I sat on the fence all day long about that German class then with all the positivity from u ladies I came home, busted butt, got dolled up and went..... However the traffic was so bad. I left and hour early N it took an hour and 45 minutes to gt there. The teacher said I was welcome to come next week but I think I'll find something closer to me. That was a nightmare drive!!! On the way back I cut across 2 lanes when I saw a Nordstrom Rack... CG's!!!! I found a Skinny Girl pair of thong undies but they fit my tummy and cut my hips in half and make me look like I have a shelf butt... No I'm not posting that video lol!! Here's what I wore to the German class I didn't get to attend. Everything for a reason right??? Thank u girls for being here, being supportive and positive and giving me that push when I needed it most and even though I didn't make it to the class I felt so much better thanks to all of u!

PS Visit Update from 9/19

Hi Ladies!!! Im so behind on getting online its been a busy weekend. Friday was my visit to the PS. I didn't get to see the Dr again!!! But I was assured my 4 month appt on 12/11 will be with him. Well I have a dog ear on the left side that will need a revision. Maybe lipo OR maybe a small cut and additional skin removal in the office with a local less than 30 minutes to correct. So that is hopeful. She was able to pull the stitch from my BB and clip it back. It was a super fast appointment. She said I don't need to wear the corset or the binder any longer unless I want to. And of course I need it its like a security blanket for me!! I was released for the gym and all my normal activities. She said I was looking as she suspected healing well and high spirits. And that at the 4 month visit he will fix the left side and itll be how I want it. I cant say I am stoked about having another recovery but hey. this is what I signed up for. She pulled out my pre-op picture. I was like that doesn't even look like me!! I don't recognize that body anymore. So things are going well and I couldn't be happier. this morning I woke up with massive energy, made a big breakfast for the boys and a protein shake for me and cleaned my entire house. I have been letting things go for weeks and hibernating as much as I can so it feels good to accomplish cleaning it all up. I still feel a little bleh Im blaming it on fall coming!! Im going to catch up on how everyone is doing. Happy Healing!!

6 Weeks Post

Good morning Ladies,

Posting a quick video to show you my dog ear that will need a revision at 4 months. The nurse said it's an in office treatment that takes more than 30 minutes with a local for the pain. It's not decided yet if it'll be lipo on both sides or just the one and or another incision OR she said he may want to do the cool sculpting on both sides and back... But definitely will need to be corrected. Other than that things are going wonderful. Happy SX day to dream cruiser. And hope everyone has a beautiful rest of the week!


Sorry ladies I've been MIA. My old job in The Bay Area has we working fr home in the evenings and it's exhausting. No time for anything these last 3 weeks.. I wanted to post a quick update this morning for my 7week progress.. Everything is doing well. Yesterday though my incision opened.. It was where the skin was pleated so I cleaned it good and taped it up. I haven't taken the tape off to see how it is. Also I feel something weird in my left breast. IDK if it's normal to feel the implant? It's hard to explain but it's almost the the corner of it or seething and when I push it it goes away. My next dr appt isn't until 12-11. I haven't started back to the gym but I am walking daily and doing cardio at home squats and lunges light things. I haven't been able to get rid of the few pounds though so I know I need to step it up. Hope all of you ladies are doing well! Hard to believe next week will be 2 months for me!
Portland Plastic Surgeon

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