Can't Make A Decision and Feeling Teary - Portland, ME

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I'm a thin, 52 year old with under muscle 300cc...

I'm a thin, 52 year old with under muscle 300cc saline implants that I've had for 13 years. I was a 34AA-A before and am now a full 34B. I've never had any problems other than rippling along the outsides, I no longer like the round, fake look and think they just don't look good on me anymore. Today I had a consult with my original ps. While he didn't exactly try to talk me into replacing the saline with smaller silicone ones, he thinks because I'm so thin and have such little breast tissue that I will not only be totally flat but almost concave as a result of the explant. I felt like a 12 year old boy before the implants thanks to nursing 3 boys each for a year, and I don't want to feel like that again but I'd certainly be happy with an A cup. My options are to have them removed, see how things look and go back later for the small silicone or just go with the small silicone now. Obviously it would cost more to go back. He does not think I need a lift in either scenario. I don't know why I'm feeling so teary about this. When I read all the stories about how happy everyone is with their explants, I feel like I'd be one of them. I just want them out. But, I don't want to have 2 divots on my chest either. Can anyone with a similar body type provide me with some guidance and insight? Thanks for the help.

Adding photos

Crystal ball needed!

I wasn't sure if I could do this but I've copied some before/after pics from the PS website that I'm seeing next week. This is not me but very similar to what I looked like before my implants 13 years ago. I do NOT want to be that flat chested again. I know none of us has a crystal ball but would it be realistic to think I'd look a little better than that after an explant?

2nd Consult A Success!

I just had a consult with another practice and I am very pleased. Unlike my first consult (with my original PS), this doctor didn't make me feel like I'd be making a mistake if I didn't have a replacement. After examining me he was confident I'd look pretty much as I did before having implants - just 13 years older! That's fair cuz I am!! He said everything is where it should be and that I have a stage 1 capsule, which doesn't require him to do anything other than take the implant out. He'll numb me up with novocaine, deflate the implant, take it out and send me on my way. VoilĂ . He said I will be a little sore and would suggest refraining from golf for 1-2 weeks, so I'm going to wait and have it done this fall.
Thank you everyone who posted with their heartfelt thoughts and support. I can't tell you what it has meant to me. I feel so much better about this process and know I'm making the right decision. I'll update again after I've had the procedure. xoxoxo

Finally on the other side

I am now 16 days post explant. The procedure was very easy - just a local anesthesia and I was on my way about an hour later. I had no pain either and only took a Tylenol PM sometime during the first night because I couldn't seem to stay asleep. I was told no running for 2 weeks but I did cheat and run on day 10 and was totally fine. I have very little breast tissue so bouncing was not an issue! I've been taking pictures every day to track my progress and I do see improvement but I know it will be many months before the "final" me. I'm finding it's very difficult to locate bras in the AA range. One good site is If anyone knows of any other sources, please share! Here goes with pictures. My left breast is a little saggier. That implant had drooped a bit in the last year or so and I was definitely uneven. Overall I'm not unhappy with the way I look and really do feel free. I had grown to hate the way my implants looked, especially in clothes. I'll add more pictures as time goes on.

15 week photos

A couple people have asked me for updated photos and I was having a heck of a time doing it. I hope this works. I don't see much change, if any. I think the fluff fairy is done with me! My right side looks better than my left and they honestly look a lot bigger in these pictures than they are in real life.
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