Anchor Lift & 440cc HP Silicone Implants - Phoenix, AZ

I've put a lot of thought, and heart into my decisions and my thoughts of my results. And right now, I'm still super unhappy. They're just too big. They seem that they're saggy (nowhere NEAR how they were before my BA + BL). Bottom line: they look like big natural boobs (in clothing). When I'm naked, I can tell that they are implants... but I don't flaunt them around naked. What matters to me is how they look in clothes. I have to work constantly to hide them, which is definitely not what I wanted. I remember when I downsized before my surgery (originally had picked a 505cc implant) I said to my surgeon, "I want to control them, not have them control me." That's far from the case.
I can't wear a strapless or tube tops because they're a little too saggy for that. The summertime is when I'm least happy. They don't look perky and cute... they just look huge. They look a bit ridiculous in a bikini, and I find myself having to find ways to cover them up constantly. Let alone, they don't fit into any bikini that fits around my rib cage (example: Usually, I fit in a medium sized shirt. In a medium sized swim suit, the boobs bust out all over the place. I'm having to purchase XL swim suit tops, which don't fit around the rib cage... and the boobs are still super tight in there).
I'm a small person, but not freakishly small! I'm 5'4" and weight about 118 pounds. By no means am I super small. I feel that I'm pretty average. So, I'm not sure why I have such a hard time fitting these boobs into bras and swim suits.
I went to Nordstroms, and measure a 32G. It's so odd because my PS says I look like a C cup, but I don't. I have friends who are C cups, and I am MUCH larger. I can't even fit one boob in my hand. I HATE the 32 G bras, they make my boobs look even bigger (although, they fit great). So, I continue to stuff myself into the same old sports bras or anything that will squish them and make them smaller. Today, I measured myself. My ribcage measured 29.0" and my bust measured 37.0".
I like to work out and run, and they don't make it easy for me to do so.
I have a ton of back pain and neck pain which leads to a lot of headaches. I see a chiropractor, and just now I'm wondering if all the extra weight I'm carrying in my chest is causing the next pain. Not sure, but you never know. I do slouch forward a lot, as a way to kind of hide my chest. I never had any kind of neck or back pain before my implants (and the pain didn't start until about 12 months. Just yesterday, I started to wonder if it's the implants causing the pain). My right side still hurts quite often, and I'm not too sure why. I've seen the surgeon and he said all looks well.
My left side hangs much lower (you can see in the photos I'm attaching). That bothers me a lot as well. In tight tops, you can see that my left side is a little larger.
All in all, my unhappiness gets worse every month that goes by. I pray every day that I would just be happy, but I'm not. I wish so badly I could just accept them, but I can't.
I have been researching having them taken out completely, with a lift. I think in the future, that is the route I'll go with. I don't even think that I want a smaller implant, I think I just want them out. I don't know how I'll manage yet with paying for another surgery, two small kids, a husband who works all the time, myself working as a teacher, etc.
It was my decision to have them done in the first place, and I have to live with it. I did suggest bigger boobs, nothing that my surgeon did wrong. I just didn't think that they would have ended up this big. I don't think anyone did. I don't blame him for these problems I'm experiencing. My scars are fantastic, almost gone. So, I'm not afraid of another surgery in terms of scarring.

To make it short and quick, each month that passes by gets worse. They start to feel larger and larger. They look (to me) like they're sagging more and more. The right side is become more and more painful as time goes on (at first I thought it was only related to hormones, but I'm finding that it now randomly hurts on and off all the time. can't figure out why).

They are too big (34DDD) on my frame. I can't fit into a 34DD- they smooth out the top like a muffin top. Super hard to shop for bras, or clothes in general. I'm a small person, so they just look up front ridiculous on me.

They're putting me into a downward emotional spiral. I know that I got myself into this, and I can't afford to get out. I saved for seven years for this procedure- and I kick myself every time I think about what I did.

I wish so badly I could go back and to have never done it at all. Sure, my boobs were a saggy gross disaster before... but now they just look like awkwardly huge large natural breasts which look saggy anyway- which is NOT the look that I wanted.

Hello! Sorry I haven't been around to update recently.

I'm so glad I had my surgery- but I'd give anything to go back and make them smaller.

Fact is, I've spent the last few months wishing they were smaller. I didn't really feel that they were REALLY too big until bikini season came along. They're hard to fit comfortably in a bikini-- and for my body just look a little too big. I wish so badly that I would have gone with something like 200cc's. Ever since July I've been in a funk and saddened by these massive things.

I know that it takes a full year to get used to them- but I'm calling it as I feel they're tol big.

It's not that I don't like them- I do. I would rather have these than what I had before.

I feel like they still can look a little saggy at times. They've also dropped considerably and aren't perky like they used to be. They just look like big natural boobs... And I guess that's not the look that I'm into right now. I wish they were perfectly perky, round and much smaller.

I feel like they control me, and I don't control them. I have to stress about which shirt to wear- and I still continue to only wear sports bras because any bra that is lined at all automatically makes them look larger. I hate to go bra shopping because the bras look like helmets. I can squeeze into a 34dd if I'm lucky... 34ddd more frequently- and there's times when that doesn't fit at VS. If I go to a fancy bra shop they tell me my size is some reducilious 30H or I or something like that. I leave VS and bra shops in tears... All in all, I just wish I made a better decision last year. I know the decision for a larger size was all me- so I am taking full responsibility for screwing up.

My scars are healing perfectly.

I won't have a surgery to make them smaller just yet. ONLY because I 1- can't afford it ar this time and 2- don't want to deal with the recovery all over again. Otherwise, I'd be signed up to have these removed and have something around 200cc's put it.

I've uplaoded a few photos. Thanks for looking!!