I spent over an hour doing my first post and the...
I spent over an hour doing my first post and the system erased it, really hoping this one works...
I've been struggling with the idea that if I go ahead with BA surgery somehow I'm not as spiritual or confident as I thought I was. I have many friends who have had it done and have never judged them...just admired how they looked...but when it came time to decide if I was going to do it, the self-criticism started. I'm happy to report that with two weeks left before my surgery date, I'm at a place where I feel like its spiritually and emotionally okay to do this. I feel powerful in owning this journey and am super excited about the enjoying the results! Thanks again to all you women who have shared your journey with me. My turn...
Weight: 106 lbs
Bra Size: 32 AA
Kids: 1-19 years old
I recently left a draining LONG-term relationship and have pt others before myself since I was 15 years old. This is surgery is a gift to myself...like I'm finally choosing to put myself first and it feels fantastic. I actually have more to give others now that I'm giving more to myself!
I've decided to let my PS decide size at the time of surgery since so many of the pictures I see with same size implants look completely different person to person. I have given him a range and am going to bring in my wish list when I see him before surgery. I feel so blessed to have a surgeon that I am absolutely confident in! He has recommended silicone gummy bear implants with a moderate plus profile which will help give me the natural look I am going for.
I have started taking vit-c, and lypo-spheric gsh. Both of which are really important for healing and getting the general anesthetic out of the system after. I've also started listening to a recording that helps to prep and heal from surgery. It's a guided relaxation and visualization and i found it really powerful. I have a sense of deep peace about the procedure and the healing...and yes, I am also sooo excited to have it done! But not anxious or nervous...her website is healfaster.com
I'm laminating a healing affirmation for the anesthesiologist to read to me during surgery...laminating it allows them to disinfect it for the OR room. It will read something like....I am at peace with my decision to have breast augmentation surgery. I radiate inner and outer beauty. My body is strong and I heal from this surgery easily and quickly. I love my new look. All is well.... I've read that we are really open to suggestions when our brains are at the level of general anesthesia. Since I think we create our reality with our thoughts so it seems like a good time to use the power of my mind ;)
I have 2 products that I'll use after the surgery to minimize any scaring. They are Master Formula's Green Ointment and Essential Silver Antibiotic Gel...they are pretty much the only topical things I have in my first aid repertoire...such good products ;) any other suggestions?
Things I couldn't live without
Here are a few things that I have found life changing during my recovery period. Highly recommend them all...they've made my healing so much faster and more comfortable!
45 degree wedge pillow-I'm not one for sleeping on my back in one spot all night. This pillow, along with another one under my head, has made sleeping and reading so much easier. I also throw a sheep skin over top to help relieve pressure points from being in one spot for so long.
Massage balls- The sock has two tennis balls in it and the other once is like a cheap kids blow up ball you can get at dollar stores. I'm not used to so little movement and it was taking it's toll on other parts of my body. These have been great to place under my back to help massage out knots and relieve pressure.
Massage Chair- OMG...that's all I've got to say about this one! Heaven for a sore back. I'm gong to really have to work on strengthening the muscles of my upper back and stretch out my chest in a few weeks!! This is helping me get by for now...
Medjool Dates- I've heard pooping is a big issue for some after surgery. I have't had that problem. I've been eating 2 dates every day and my digestion seems better than prior to surgery :)
Bio-K- A great probiotic to balance out the gut and flora after pain meds and antibiotics. I opted out of the oral antibiotics after surgery (with the ok from my PS) but was given a dose during surgery. I haven't had any issues I would normally experience with taking meds or antibiotics. Usually I am really sensitive to these sorts of things but all good.
Vit-C and GSH- both of these supplements are vital for tissue repair and are BIG in anti-oxidants. I started taking them about 3 days after surgery as I didn't want to overload my system to early on...I started to feel the effects right away. I finally felt like my head was more clear and I was stronger...
Hope this helps some of you!
I felt well prepared for surgery...the biggest challenge was that it was scheduled for 1:00 but I didn't go in until 2:30...which means I was starving!! All in all, I had a great experience and felt totally supported by Dr Peterson and his team. One of my nurses was born on the same day as me, which I took as another sign that I was in the right place at the right time!
I met with the anesthesiologist and asked him to read the affirmation I had written out and laminated. He was happy to do this and asked how many times I wanted it read...to which I replied, as many times as you can :) Apparently he read it to me after my operation while I was recovering too...so great!
I also met with my plastic surgeon to review sizing. I showed him the pictures on my wish list and he said 325 and 350 moderate profile was the way to go. This is a bit bigger than what I originally wanted but after looking at thousands of pictures, I decided not to get too caught up on cc's or bra size since it tends to look different on different body types.
When I first woke up and saw my new girls...I cried, and it wasn't from happiness. I was so shocked at how big they looked...and oddly shaped too! The nurse talked me down and explained again that this was normal and they would look great once they settled. I think it was partly emotion from coming out of general anesthetic.
I had brought a size B and C surgical bra with me but the nurse had to call a friend and ask them to go buy and bring me a size D!! I had looked at the size D in the store and laughed because it looked ridiculously big...more like a helmet than a bra :)
I was worried about nausea and dizziness after but didn't have much at all...It was hard to walk (kind of felt like I'd had too many glasses of wine) and the pain was minimal. I had been told a few times that when I woke up it would feel like there was an elephant on my chest. It wasn't that intense, just a little challenging to breathe.
I was planning on taking as little pain medication as possible but then a friend gave me some great advice. She said that if my body if fighting the pain then I'm not using that energy to heal. I haven't needed a lot of help with the pain but I did take about 1.5 tabs of Tramacet and some Advil.
I feel super blessed to have had the help of my mom and a girlfriend who have helped do all the little things...yes, even help me pull my pants up...haha. I have a new found appreciation for my core muscles and my pecks...Now that I'm not using my arms...my core is doing all the work. I never realized how much I use my chest muscle before.
Ice has been my best friend. It really helps to relieve the pressure from all the swelling. I'm definitely having small moments of OMG what did I do...but I also have faith that soon things will look and feel well worth it.
Day 1 Post-Op
I'll do a day by day re-cap for the first week. There are a lot of ups and downs, questions and emotions during this first week and other reviews on here have really helped me get through it!
Day 1 Post-Op has been pretty foggy. I'm really effected by the pain meds. Today I'm taking a half a tramacet in the AM and another one at night. In between I'm doing Advil and Tylenol. I have a little bit of abdominal bloat but not uncomfortable. The lower pole of both breasts have some numbness but not completely.
The girls are looking really weird. High, tight, misshapen. I've been told to expect this, that it's a normal part of the process but I can't help worrying. It's been really helpful to read others reviews on here who have gone through the same thing. Not going to lie...I'm a little envious of those whose breasts look good right out of the start gate!! I feel like I've waited for this for so long that I just want them to look good already...haha patience is not a strong point of mine.
My mom has been staying with me and between her and my 19 year old daughter, I'm being well taken care of. Actually, since I'm usually the care taker of others, it's a bit challenging to let others do things for me...Spent most of the day on the couch watching movies...so much for catching up on reading. I can't lift a book and probably couldn't concentrate on reading if I could :)
My pain is at a minimum...again just discomfort. My surgical bra is getting kind of uncomfortable. I have a new found appreciation for those of you who have to wear supportive bras with underwire regularly. They SUCK!!! especially when you have incisions healing underneath.
OK...don't let these first photos scare you. Totally feel like I have frankenboobs, but I know it won't last. One day I'll look back and laugh....
Day 2 Post-Op
Day 2 has ben pretty much the same as day 1. Little pain (taking a little bit less pain meds) and my swelling has gone down a bit.
I'm starting to get some aches in other areas of my body from being in once place. The balls I showed on my 'things I couldn't live without' review are helping relieve muscle tension in my back and legs and getting up a couple times an hour to move around feels good too.
I'm doing a bit more on my own...can pull up my own pants, lol! Still nice to have help around since I wouldn't be eating as much as I am...I don't have a lot of energy or motivation to do much.
I didn't sleep well last night. Awake about every half hour. I got a call from a nurse at my PS's offices and she said to stop taking the Tramacet if possible. There's caffeine in the pills which can cause some people to have problems sleeping. It was strange because I was sooo tired but couldn't sleep. She recommends switching to regular Tylenol.
I think my breasts look even more strange today not that some of the swelling is going down. My girlfriend who took these pics kept saying they're going to look great...not sure who she was trying to convince...me or her ;)
Day 3 Post-Op
I'm noticing changes day by day...not just in my breasts by in my head as well.
I'm off all narcotic pain control, just taking Tylenol and Advil a coupe times a day. My head is starting to clear and I'm noticing what a fog I've been in for the past couple days. Less swelling and more dropping of the girls. Not looking close to normal yet but feels good to know things are moving in the right direction...literally!
Still icing regularly. Today is my first show day and I am so needing it, haha. It was super cool to have my 19 year wash my hair and help dry me off..If my mom had asked me to help her shower when I was 19 I probably would have told her to put a bathing suite on first. We had a good laugh at the state of my breasts!
I've developed an itchy rash on the front of my neck...It's kind of like hives. I figure it's just the toxins making their way out...not too worried about it.
I left my bra off for a few hours, did a little bit of massage (my post op instructions say to start this day 3-5) and went out for my first walk. I definitely overdid it!! LADIES...DONT START DOING MORE THE MINUTE YOU FEEL BETTER! Think I was getting antsy sitting around doing nothing but felt awful in the afternoon and my swelling came back. I put my surgical bra back on and iced which felt so good. Not going to make this mistake again. Giving myself lots of downtime while I can, even if I feel like doing more.
I can get about 2-3 fingers between my collarbone and top of the implants now and they are looking less like shelves sticking out from my chest. Really noticing how tight things are in my chest...starting to roll my shoulders forward. Will begin physio in a few weeks to get back into neutral alignment and help my body balance out again.
Day 4 Post-Op
I was well prepared for the physical toll this would have on me but didn't realized how emotional this journey would be. I spent a good portion of the day crying. It didn't take much to bring it on and I think I felt depressed for the first time in my life. Not about anything in particular...just in general... a total funk.
Some of this probably has to do with the fact that I got my period a couple days ago, so my hormones are really active right now. I also think it has something to do with the fact that this surgery affects the heart chakra. I'm trying to allow the emotions to come up and release whenever I feel them. The crying feels good and I had a good poor me talk with my girlfriend which also helped me to move through things. My mantra for today is 'this too shall pass'.
Ive kept my surgical bra on and, while I hated it a couple days ago, I am really enjoying the support it gives me and notice that it's helping to keep down the swelling.
I didn't take anything for pain today, but will do and Advil/Tylenol combo tonight just to make sure I get a good sleep. Still noticing gradual changes. I don't look as funny in clothes any more. For the last few days, I felt like a football player with pads on even when I was dressed.
Every morning I wake up it's a surprise to see how my breasts will look today...which one will be higher...look bigger, haha, a humorous process really. My right breast seems to be about a day behind my left most of the time. This is the one that had more cc's added since it was the smaller one to begin with.
Hope this is helping some of you going through he same journey!
Day 5 Post-Op
Today was another roller coaster ride emotionally. Concerns about having made the right decision about the size keeps coming up. It's hard to wait so long for something only to have it done and wait again for it to look right. Doubts about whether it will actually look good in the end had been creeping up as well.
I've gone out of the house a few times but am careful with what I wear since I still feel like I look odd...really fake in tank tops and tighter shirts. Disappointing since that's one of the reasons I got this done in the first place! I feel more self conscious now than I ever did before BA. I know this period just requires patience and faith...I just feel like I'm running out of both of these sometimes.
I noticed the least amount of change this past 24 hours...seems like I've plateaued a bit. Swelling is about the same. I can't go without my sexy support bra or the swelling gets bad. I took a couple Advil today and that's it. On a good note, the rash I've had on my neck for the past couple days seems to be going away!
I think my liver is really working to detoxify from all these meds and the GA. I've heard that when our liver is under stress, the associated emotion is anger. I've had my mom staying with me, and after having thoughts of killing her today (JK but I'm sure some of you can relate...nice to have them around, nice to see them go), I decided it was time for her to go home ;)
Another thing that I noticed today is that my support bra has been sitting a bit high on my chest...I think this is maybe keeping the girls high as my incision mark (where my PS expects my breast folds to be) is a little lower. I've lowered my bra a bit and am expecting that to help my girls to relax!!
I felt like the clouds were clearing a bit today. I had more energy and didn't feel depressed. I went out and did some errands then went to a friends birthday. I still needed a nap in the afternoon but am starting to feel more like myself! It felt good to be out and with others....think I was having some cabin fever this week; I'm not used to taking that much down time.
Small changes in my breasts today. I got the chance to show them off to a few girlfriends (most of whom have implants themselves) and the fact that they thought they looked normal for this stage was such a good reassurance. This process had made me realize how high my expectations are for myself. My intention is to trust the process more and relax a little :)
TIP: one of the girls at the party suggested I cut the underwire out of my support bra...it's been pushing on my incisions. It feels so much better. I'm still getting the support I need but I think the girls are dropping a bit faster and it's way more comfortable!! The bra I bought still keeps it's shape without the wire :)
I was a bit nervous about being seen after surgery by a big group of friends for the first time. I feel like they are huge but I think it's just my perception going from almost nothing to a D-cup. I don't think I'll be in a D cup for long as it's already getting a little baggy now that the swelling is going down. I'd like to be a C cup in the end and things are looking that way. It's tempting to go out and buy bras right now but I'm going to try and hold of for a couple more weeks so I am closer to my true size.
Finally, I feel like I have hard nipples almost all the time. I'm really noticing them in tight shirts even though I have my support bra on too...maybe I'm just used to wearing bras that have padding so I didn't notice it before but feel like I'm constantly flashing my headlights, haha. Will need to buy some bras with more material to cover those puppies up :)
Woohoo Day 7
Here's my post from day 7...I'll start to do weekly posts now unless something interesting comes up...
I am happy to report that things are started to look and feel even better. I've finally turned a corner and can see light at the end of the tunnel. The swelling has gone down significantly. I'm no longer filling out my size D bra (thank god!) and they are beginning to drop and fluff more. Although I still have moments where I feel like they are balls on my chest, especially now that the surrounding swelling has started to decrease.
I wore an old sports bra today for the entire day. By the end of it, I was ready for the fuller support of my surgical bra. It felt like things started to get heavy and there was a lot of pulling on the muscles under my arm pits. But, I also think this allowed them to drop even further. I'm actually thinking of going out to buy some new bras today...not sure if this is too early to tell sizing yet?
Right breast is still behind my left one in dropping but I guess it's because this was the smaller one to start with....It's really helpful to have dil pictures so I can prove to myself that there have been major changes :)
I saw a fried today who I hadn't told about the surgery...at the end of our visit, I ended up telling him and he said he wondered if there was something different...when I asked him why he said when we hugged he felt them pushing against him...wonder if this is going to make me self conscious when I hug people?!
I've got more energy...actually cleaned the house and did laundry for the first time in a week and am emotionally and mentally coming out of the fog I've been in. I'm still sleeping on my back on the 45 degree wedge pillow and am finding it surprisingly comfortable!
I've started using neurogen and green cream on my breasts 1-2x day to help with the stretching and discomfort. Another two products I couldn't live without!
2 weeks Post Op
Not much to report...things are continuing to settle. Healing well!! Still have days where they feel really big (I'm measuring a size D/DD) but all in all happy that I have boobies!
Week 3 Update
This was a bit of a tough week...still feeling up and down emotionally...partly because I'm still adjusting physically and partly because I think I must still be detoxing from the surgery drugs and general anesthetic. I find I wear out easily and feel really blue when I'm overtired. My goal for the next week is to give myself lots of down time and rest!
Slowly but surely they are dropping and fluffing. I'm feeling comfortable in most shirts now. I went to a concert over the weekend and it was the first time in my life the I was able to wear a super low cut dress...they looked pretty good!I can push them together and they have more give too! With the adjustment I've found that my shoulders neck and upper back are really tired by the end of the day...nothing that a hot bath, massage chair and change of bras doesn't fix :)
I had my post-op with my ps a few days ago...they took off my steri-strips and I got to see my incision for the first time...I think they look pretty good for 3 weeks out. I can feel there are still some internal stitches that haven't resorbed so they look and feel more bumpy than they will once the stitches are all gone. I've been given the go ahead to go bra-less at night and to start physio. He said things are looking normal for the 3 week mark.
I'll post some incision photos next week!
4 weeks Post Op...It really does happen fast
Ok so the four weeks before surgery took FOREVER to go by and this past 4 weeks has flown by!
Well I finally listened to my body this week and slowed down. I started to feel better about a week after surgery and have been going full throttle pretty much ever since. I can tell that my body is still processing and adjusting and this all takes time and energy. I've given myself a good few days of being quiet and resting lots and it's just what I needed...I'm feeling a lot better mentally and physically. Biggest piece of advice so far...give yourself time to heal. I think theres a fear that I'll never feel 100% back to normal and so I act as though things are normal...trying to do everything I did before I had the BA...What I realize is I take time to heal, maybe more than others and that's ok. I'm pretty in tune with what's happening in my body, which also means I'm more aware of things that are out of balance. It's a blessing and a curse, lol.
As for physical changes...my scars are healing nicely. They are becoming less ropey and the redness is fading. I'm developing a nice slope, however, this is a process...and requires patience! The changes at the begging happened really fast...every day was a big difference. Every day is still different but the changes are smaller now.
Oooh and I wore a bikini for the first time and had a hot tub...felt sooo good. They still look more fake than I want them to but I'm getting used to the size and know they will look a lot different just in time for bathing suite season :) Everyone who sees them says they don't look too big...I guess when you're used to seeing your body a certain way, any major change seems BIG!
I'll probably start to post monthly now unless something exciting happens...good luck to all you brave ladies going through or getting ready for this process!!
Light at the end of the tunnel
I thought all of my posts would include physical changes since these were the most important to me after my BA. As those of you who have been following my journey know, the emotional and mental changes came as a bit of a shock to me....so I wanted to give those of you experiencing similar things a bit of hope.
I am now 7 and a bit weeks post-op and have finally turned a corner mentally and emotionally. I haven't felt like myself since surgery...until this weekend! And I even came down with a nasty cold and am supporting my mom who went into hospital last week. I have felt tired and blue or down a lot of the time. This is unlike how I normally feel and I was beginning to wonder if I would ever feel like myself again.
I got to the place where I was able to accept how I was feeling and to just give myself what I needed. Which meant a lot of rest and lots of crying too...I can say that in giving myself this space, in totally accepting that this was how I felt and not beating myself up for it...it changed!!
There is light at the end of the tunnel if this is the way you are feeling...just love yourself for however you are, right now, and it will get better.
I had a nice collection of suits before my surgery but none of them fit any more...I live in an area with a really hot summer and am heading to Vegas next week so it seemed like the perfect time to restock.
I'm at 2 months post op and know things are still settling but I picked suits that will fit well even with the changes to come..the style of suits that fit me now are totally different to what I'm used to. I'm super excited to wear strapless suits and avoid tan lines!!!
Ready to feel sexy and empowered poolside!
Two Months Post Op
So I can finally say that I'm comfortable with my new breasts!! They still have a ways to go but I think that if nothing else were to change (which I know it still will), I would be ok with the way they feel and look now.
The stretching feeling has finally subsided for the most part. I can still tell my body is finding a new norm and I make sure that I stretch regularly and have started strengthening...although I'm not comfortable doing anything that involves too much chest yet. I started running last week (around week 7) and it feels sooo good. Although I still seem to tire more quickly than before. I bought a really supportive sports bra and here's no movement at all when I run. Trying to keep these babies supported well as much as possible. I have definitely used up my budget for bras and swim suits, lol.
For a couple weeks (around weeks 5-7) I starting taking half a robaxacet at night and and advil mid day to help my muscles release...it really seemed to make a difference as this was when I noticed most changes. I've also been seeing a massage therapist who does myofacial release. I think this should be mandatory after any type of surgery. My breasts look amazing every time he works on me and my body loves it! I've also started using silicone strips on my scars and cannabis serum on my breast at night. I think my scars look great for 2 months and the cannabis topical cream reduces inflammation :)
I feel like my right is still noticeable bigger and higher than my left (it had the 25cc's extra to even out my breast size. I assume this will continue to improve as things drop and fluff further. I also notice that from the side, both breast seem a little flat by the nipple. I hope this too will continue to change. I talked to a girlfriend last night who had her done 15 years ago and she said hers continued to change big time for a good 6-8 months. Happy to hear I'm not the only one who's taking their time to heal!!
I'm still pretty happy with size. It's taken almost the entire two months to talk myself into accepting the size since it was bigger than I ever would have chosen to go on my own. I love that I don't have to wear padded bras for them to look good in clothes. No one from my family (that I didn't tell) has mentioned anything...they probably just think I'm wearing a great bra, haha. I think my surgeon picked a great size and I'm sure I'll continue to get used to the size.
I think thats all for now. I'll post again at 3 months..if you have any questions, just ask :)
3 Months and Loving them!!!
Alright, so I heard it before when I read other reviews but it's true...3 months happen fast and I'm finally at a point where I don't think about my breasts all the time :) I still think about them a lot have feel so much gratitude for them but they are feeling like a part of me now and I honestly thought that might never happen.
My favourite part of having nice breasts is going braless...which I do a lot!! I feel so sexy (something I never felt prior to BA...I felt beautiful, just not sexy) and love wearing bikinis. My goal over the next few months is to find a personal trainer and get the rest of my body into great shape. I want this to be the time in my life where I can look back and be like, damn that was the best shape I was ever in and I felt sooo good...like inspiration for the rest of my life!
Hmm...what were my biggest changes over the past month? I guess the biggest one is that they feel like mine. They are soft and have giggle to them and move when I move. I've gotten back into yoga again and haven't found any pose that makes them feel foreign. My moods cords have pretty much all disappeared and I've really been working on massaging away the scar tissue along my incision line.
If I could go back in time I would absolutely do this again. I'd go with the same size too! A reminder that originally I had wanted between 250-275cc's and ended up letting my surgeon decide on 325 and 350 cc's. I wouldn't want it any other way! I'll post again at 4 months just for fun :)
Here's a quick look of my healing journey...can't believe I didn't freak out more along the way...they looked sooo bad. Gotta have faith ladies!!