Boobs Beyond my Years - New Zealand, NZ

I'm here, and it's time to share my journey. Reading everyone else's reviews have been so crucial in making this decision and keeping my sanity and I look forward to returning the favour.

I am 23, 24 by the time I have the surgery, and a size 34DD (on a good day). The deal-breaker is that I am 5 feet tall and 123lb, so I am almost all boob and people like to point it out.

Since making the decision to have surgery I have become more aware of passing comments, but less sensitive to them. For example, if I were obese then no one would feel the need to tell me- so why is it everyone's right to make a comment about my breast size?! I am now more open to telling people how their comments make me feel as I know I'll only have to put up with them for a few more months. Light at the end of the tunnel!

It would be fine if I was just "big" - and in fact, after surgery, I wouldn't mind if they were still "big" which for my frame would take me to a C cup I think. I would be perfectly happy. I just don't like when people use the term 'gigantic' or 'massive' to describe me, or my personal favourite 'huge rack' (that was just last weekend, from one of my good friends' husband).

I digress... A bit more about me, I guess. I was a late bloomer. Going into college (age 12-13) I was still flat chested and teased about it. Oh, what I wouldn't give to go back to that. I was also slim and undeveloped in other physical ways as any pre-teen girl is. I have attached a picture(s) of me from age 14 onwards to show how over a period of 3 years I went from being a chubby teen with a regular sized bust to a late teen with more than I knew how to cope with.

I was always in denial about my size so I cannot say for sure how big I was. I hit a new low in my last year of high school, age 17, with probably E+ breasts and the dress sense to show them off... not ideal. I grew into them a bit after that, learned to dress around them, and my weight and relationship with my breasts both fluctuated regularly.

Like most people on here, I imagine, I never really realised how BIG I was until I saw it in photos. And I think I will have that realisation again when they're gone and I look back. Certain photos made me cringe, and my mum (who is also big but not massive) could see it in my every day life. I had terrible posture, despite doing ballet and other dance for 10+ years, and was always trying to hide them even if I had to make myself look fatter in the process.

Through 3 years of university they didn't both me too much, I don't re-call any incidents where I was terribly upset because of them but shopping was (and still is) a disheartening experience. I definitely got a lot of attention because of them, and the clothes I chose to wear, but as a young single woman it didn't bother me.

After university I started working at a health insurance company. I noticed how many people were having a reduction and claiming it through insurance and I grew green with envy that these woman had the money and determination to go through with it. I need to add now, the NZ government used to fund breast reductions commonly but the funding got cut and now it can be a 5-10 year wait and the criteria is stricter. Insurance companies will often subsidise but not pay the full amount. Mine is likely to be NZ$9500 but they can be up to NZ$16000.

By this stage in my life my weight has fluctuated even more. From 110lb with a 32DD bust to 145lb with a 36F bust. My poor body couldn't keep up and neither could my mind. I wasn't looking after myself and it was taking its toll on my poor boobies.

It wasn't until this year that I considered a reduction as a viable option for me. Again, I don't remember one specific moment but I can tell you that it has been VERY quick for me. It's only March now and I have my consult with my PS at the end of May which suits me fine because I can't have the surgery until after June due to health insurance requirements. I have had numerous discussions with my partner, one particularly supportive friend and my mum and worked out my finances but no matter what I had the drive and determination to DO THIS THING!

More about my partner's reaction. I think I threw it on him a bit fast, not realising that even though it had been going through my mind half-heartedly for years now and more seriously for a few weeks. His reaction upset me, and we argued, but after 3-4 weeks we resolved any issues there may have been. I wrongly assumed that he was concerned about the financial aspect but actually he was concerned that I wanted it because he didn't make me feel beautiful enough! Of course he didn't tell me that, it wasn't until I read some reviews on here and thought to tell him "Hey, it's not you, it's me" that he warmed up to the idea. His mum has had it done and I think I put 2+2 together and got 7 and wrongly assumed that he understood the physical and mental aspects of the procedure.

I don't think he ever really understood why his mum did it, but what male would? I explained to him how miserable I was, explained that the constant back pain I have will be gone (or minimised) and explained how much more confident I would be. Long story short, we're all go!

A bit more about me, physically. I have a desk job, so I sit down all day. I have terrible posture and constant knots in my upper back and shoulders. I exercise 5 times a week and have done for the last 2 years since I decided to take my body back and from this I get pain in my thoracic (middle) spine. I am a healthy weight for my height, my BMI is 24 thought I would like to be smaller but that is one thing I will work on changing myself (having already lost and kept off 22lb in the last 2 years. I take pride in my appearance, do my hair and makeup every day and love to dress up in dresses and heels.

Which takes me back to my shopping experiences..

Can I please add right now that if you are still reading, you are doing very well! I didn't realise how much information was going to pour out of my fingertips!

Since losing 22lb shopping has actually gotten worse. I have a figure that I would love to show off but can't as I feel so self-conscious in fitting clothes. Previously I had a bust to almost match my over-weight body but of those 22lb I lost, I'd be lucky if 2 of them came from my bust. Very disproportionate.

So I have a 2 month wait to see my PS and it can't come quick enough. Hoping to have my surgery within 6 weeks after my consult. I doubt that there is anything he can say that will change my mind. My friend, mum and partner have all expressed any concerns (or just questions) that they have, and nothing bothers me.

As far as I am concerned, this is a done deal. My work has prematurely approved two weeks off, though I think this might not be enough.. But I am going into this with a positive mind-set and a can-do attitude so that hopefully I can be back at work after that. I have only been in my job 4 months so they are very nice to give me any at all.

I am keeping myself healthy, both exercising and eating well as I have read a few reviews from people who have expressed how well they heal potentially due to their overall health and this is something I am working towards. I am still actively researching and reading reviews on here as nothing is set in stone until I am under than anaesthesia!

Lastly, I am hoping to go down to a C cup but going to let my PS make the final decision on that.

If you have read down to here, thank you, and I hope some of you can point me in the direction of your review or leave a comment :)