Mommy Total Makeover - New York, NY

Sorry I haven't updated ;
DAYS BEFORE SURGERY: I was not a feared surgery was almost here. I spoke to my relatives, my mom, my child and hubby prepared them if anything were to go wrong. I felt confident and that's why I was not a feared.

Night before surgery my nurse call me to make sure I was okay and told her I was 100% okay and I'm ready for this. She sounded surprised and told me if I felt scared or can't sleep to take a Valium. I was okay but after talking to hubby we decided I should take it jut in case I start to panic at night or have a nightmare. I wanted to wake up refreshed. I took some before photo just as a reminder and for motivation after surgery to keep positive and it works. I called my my little man he was staying with grandma and I just want to assure him everything will be okay. I called the hotel to confirm my stay. I then went to bed with no worries.

SURGERY DAY: Yay!!! I woke up refreshed and had some good sleep. I was a little nervous running into traffic and wanted to leave as soon as possible. I double checked my bags for my medications, some lite foods, my walker if needed, my documents and some extra clothing that i'll need since i'll be staying overnight at the hotel. My surgery was at 12pm and I was really excited while driving I got call from the hospital that the PS's are ready and that I can come earlier. I got to the hospital and checked in at the same time texting my surgeon letting him know I have arrived. I sat down for a moment and chitchat with my hubby and laugh a bit. I told him it's crazy how I will come in as one person and come out looking like another.lol... I was called in, I changed in my surgical gown and I had the nurse bring in my hubby to keep me company. We were brought up to the surgery floor and where I meet with a nurse and my surgeon. He then draw the line within the lingerie I wanted to hide the incision at. The nurse had put the IV after that I think I began to get nervous and needed to go to the restroom. I got out my hubby kissed me said I'll see you when you get out. I smiled and was guided by my nurse to the OR room. I then saw the surgical bed and bright lights and got extremely nervous. I looked back when the door was shut my heart began racing so fast within seconds. I breathed in and out and was placed on the bed. I began to feel calm from the IV and slowly drifted away.

WHAT AM I A FEARED OF? : UMmmm... Maxing out my credit cards lol..... I feel like if my results come out nearly as I am dreaming of, I will be going on an ultimate shopping spree. Hehehe..... I haven't really been buying clothes for sometime now. Last fall I bought here and there some tank tops to fit my body since, I lost weight and 2 pair of jeans that i force myself into purposely to lose more weight but that's all. Let me tell you i was a shopaholic long ago.... Man i use to shop! My mom always use to say my goodness do you need that many shoes you only have a pair of feet. Lol ...I had ton of everything. Which really went out the window and into the garbage when I gained weight I just refused to shop for what I wanted but want I needed. I was at my highest 169-172 which to some people it's nothing .... I'am at 150- 152 lbs now might not seem much but my weight went into my legs the most, my arms and my boobs. It was difficult to do leg workouts, jumping jacks or even run. A women can be big but when she's big in the legs it's even harder I believe. I was truly out of shape. My whole life I've been active just until I had an accident and that really changed things. I'm pushing myself more each day and hoping to god that I will be in shape, healthy and strong after recovery so I'am able to do things with my family like I use too. Counting down..... 8 days to go!