Almost 5 months post op ! - Nashville, TN

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About 10 years ago I was 220 pounds. I then lost...

About 10 years ago I was 220 pounds. I then lost to 180 pounds then regained with pregnancy to 220 then lost again then gained again. At the end- I had reached 220 pounds three times. I had one vaginal birth and one c-section. I am now 5'7 and 140 pounds and 31 years old and have maintained this weight for 5 years. I am very active with weight training and cardio and I eat pretty well. I have wanted this surgery for almost 3 years! About 3 years ago I went for my first two consults only to realize that I could not afford the procedure. Fast forward to now... and its finally time. I am WAY more nervous now! Was everyone else? I also have alot of guilt- not being able to go to my kids valentines day parties at school, not being able to take care of everyone for a week or two ( I get up early and prepare all meals for everyone and take care of the house and all errands) I am not used to having any help and I hate to be asking for it. I also have never had surgery (biggest thing I have had done is c-section) I also have never done drugs or had any pain killers or really anything but tylenol and epidural so I am nervous about how my body will react to the medicines. I am super excited too! I can't wait to be more comfortable in the bedroom!- That is the main reason I am doing this!- I also cant wait to stop layering my clothing, especially workout clothes. I am always scared they will rise up and my skin will flap about. LOL. Also- I want to go to water parks and play on all the kids stuff with my kiddos and not be worried my tank top swimsuit will raise up.
The other hard thing is when people make comments. One I heard yesterday was "I'm just sad that you are unhappy with yourself and feel like you need to do this." Truth is- I am happy. I am enhancing. Make sense? I love myself and if for some reason I couldnt get this procedure done- it wouldnt be the end of the world. I am excited and my husband is supportive and we finally have the money to move forward. I cant wait to have girl boobs again!! Ha!( I used to be a DD when I was heavier!) I also am getting excited that for the first time in my adult life I might even wear a bikini! :)
Anyway- I am so greatful to have found this site. It has really helped me alot! Thanks to everyone who posts!!

I'm getting so excited!! More excited than nervous...

I'm getting so excited!! More excited than nervous finally!! It is next week! I finally told my kids that I will be having a surgery and they will be going to grandma's for a couple of days. They are good with it all! This has been a very interesting process. I don't know if anyone else feels this way and perhaps I overanalyze it all- but throughout this process (thinking about surgery, waiting, telling friends and family, asking for help, paying for it, etc.) I have changed. It may sound ridiculous but I like myself more now than I did 3 months ago. Not because I am having a surgery- but because I have had to really think about why I wanted a surgery to change my body. I also had to grow a pair (LOL) I have always been a people pleaser and I was terrified to tell people what I was doing for fear of them judging me for it. Well, for once in my life I dont really care. Ha! I am doing what I want. If someone doesnt approve, I respect their opinion and concern, but quite frankly, I dont give a damn. It feels good to finally be like this. It has changed me. Also, I realized how much I do like myself. I really did have to think on this one. I am scared to death of surgery and it is a lot of money for our family to spend- so why was I doing this. I realized that I am doing it becausw I do like myself but these are enhancements and I think its going to make me more fun in the bedroom ,Lol ;) I also realized that there are risks in life- you just choose which ones you want to take. You have to choose to live- not just exist. Thats what I feel like I am doing. I am living- I am going to have a rockin body, better sex life, buy my first bikini, look forward to vacations that involve water, and for once I am going through with something that pleases me, not everyone else. Anyway- I may get some eye rolls when someone reads this because I might would and my husband would (Lol)- I have definitely thought about it all alot and as probably most would say I have WAY overanalyzed this... but maybe there are some others that feel like I do and have struggled with some guilt and anxiety. Anyway- just thought I would share. I will add before pics when I take some and figure out how to post- I'm not the best with techi stuff!

Had another appointment today just to go over...

Had another appointment today just to go over everything again and be clear. I decided to go up in size to 425 cc- well actually one breast will be bigger like over 400 and the other slightly under 400. I have assymetrical breasts and we are doing this to see if it helps balance out without a lift. I can always go back in later for a lift. I also found out that he is not doing any lipo- just cutting off skin and fat and stretching down skin super tight and muscle repair. I am excited!! My husband seems a bit freaked out now though! He is scared I will have breasts that he doesnt like. He is EXTREMELY supportive but does have a preference in the look of the breasts. I told him not to worry - that anything is better than what I have now. LOL! Anyway- I am going to attempt to upload photos.

Okay, so I thought that the week of surgery would...

Okay, so I thought that the week of surgery would drag on slowly... but NO it is flying by!!! I cant believe I only have like 2 and a half days left!! And those days are booked solid! I am very excited but also very nervous! My face is breaking out like a teenager, I am huge (hopefully from bloating and not mindless stress eating- LOL) and I am not sleeping at all really- I wake up all through the night and today woke up at 4:50 and couldn't go back to sleep. ! I think about the surgery every minute!! I am very ready to have this behind me. I have never been overly worried about the pain- I know it will be painful and that it will eventually pass - but now as we are getting closer I am thinking about it more and more! Also I am getting a cold. :( I am drinking tons of water and eating lots of fruits and veggies to try and keep it mild and help it pass. I also am freaking out about implant size now! I started at 350 cc and now I am at 400 on one side and 425 on the other. And now I am thinking about going up again to 425/450. I know so many women that regret not going bigger. I think the bigger would look better on me I just don't want them to stand out if I am in a fitted shirt. I wear fitted t shirts and jeans all the time. I also haven't bought any bras. Should I? My PS said I have to wear the bra they give me for 6 weeks! But I thought maybe I should go buy a cheapo just so I can try it out and see how they look the weeks after. Everyone else nervous in the days before? I am super blessed to have tons of support. People are trying to bring meals and offer tons of help. I even have 4 people coming to the surgery itself ( maybe akward. LOL) but they want to be there to support my husband and me. Anyway- as I said in last posts- this process have changed me. I am happy and more confident than ever ( even not having surgery yet) This has been a stressful, but very positive experience so far.

Well, I'm a wreck today! Yesterday was worse...

Well, I'm a wreck today! Yesterday was worse though. I'm feeling tremendous anxiety, fear, and mostly guilt. I know it's just anxiety but it's hard! I am less than 24 hours away!!! I just ate sushi, will I regret that? I'm also having boob size anxiety!! Too big? Too small? Can anyone calm me down?

Well, I'm awake and getting ready. I have to head...

Well, I'm awake and getting ready. I have to head for surgery in one hour. Surprisingly, I slept pretty well. I'm nervous and trying to not think too much about it all. Good luck to everyone else having surgery today or tomorrow.

I'm at home now. I hate the groggy feeling the...

I'm at home now. I hate the groggy feeling the most. I do have pain, about a 5-6 , but I'm trying to get up and walk a lot, eat, drink and stay on top of things. Hope everyone is doing well!

Well it's 4 am and I'm up an thought I would check...

Well it's 4 am and I'm up an thought I would check in. I'm taking some pain killer but nothing else. Oh wait, I'm on ibuprofen too. Pain has been about a 5/6 the entire time. I get up about every two or three hours to walk and pee and eat a cracker and drink something. How long / much walking should I be doing? So far I do about 3-4 minutes every two or three hours. Is that enough? I also flex my toes an legs periodically. My husband has helped so much!!!!! He wakes me up and helps me. He says my boobs are huge! Lol. I'm sure it's mainly swelling. Right now I'm setting small goals: make it to post op day 3/4, make it to appointment, make it to week one. As long as I'm laying ( I'm on couch using 5-6 pillows for support. ) then it's just minimal discomfort. Anyway, happy healing and fast healing to everyone out there! :)

Well I'm entering post op day 2. Slept pretty good...

Well I'm entering post op day 2. Slept pretty good last night and pain wasn't too bad. I'm spacing my pain meds more often because I feel like I can tolerate the pain more than a drugged feeling. The best things I've had that I would recommend are : crackers, sprite, a walker, extra sets of pjs that are BIG! And lots of pillows. I smell horrible!!! I'm going to try and clean up with wet wipes today and brush teeth and hair! Woohoo! My dr said no shower until all drains are out. As long As I am laying around I pretty much feel okay. When I get up and walk or even sit up for a period of time that's when I feel worse . But I'm a nut about walking so I make myself walk around our house (not a big house) 2-3 times every couple of hours . The bra they gave me is so dang tight! That's my other complaint. So far though its been About what I expected. I have had to take a lot more help than I thought I would. I am a little scared of being alone too. I have low blood pressure already an I can tell its really low right now and I have a bp cuff And yesterday it read -103/64. So not too low but I am trying to watch it. For years I have had trouble with dizziness and near fainting from it. I just drink tons and eat what I can to help with nausea an bp. Anyway, I can't see my results because they said leave it all on until Tuesday. I know I have boobs though, cause they're up on my face! Lol! Well ladies, happy healing... One day at a time.

I'm at the end of post op day 3. I am getting...

I'm at the end of post op day 3. I am getting horrible headaches that I think are from the narcotics. I hate to take any narcotics so I only take them but about every 6-8 hours. They make me feel so drugged. I also haven't had a BM yet. I'm eating about 1/3 to 1/2 of normal calories so thats probably part of it. I'm actually up watching a movie right now and feel decent. I'm getting scared to be alone Tuesday which is the plan. I'm also scared for this binder to come off. I'm scared I will pass out when it finally comes off. My hair is falling out too. This is a pretty intense process but I just keep thinking one day at a time.

Well, I'm up at 5 am because I had a BM!!...

Well, I'm up at 5 am because I had a BM!! Yippee!!! Seriously, I'm excited over this! I also haven't had anything but ibuprofen in 24 hours. The pain is so much more tolerable than the drugged feeling for me. I also washed my hair yesterday! It wAs so gross! We have a big farm house style sink so I just leaned over it and my mom washed it. I also say outside , that made a world if difference!!! The sun and fresh air cleared my head so much! My kids come home today! I'm excited an scared! They've only been gone from me this long maybe once before now. I know that's ridiculous! They've had a blast at grammas house but I know they are ready to be home. Yesterday was my emotional wreck day. I cried and cried. I didn't even care that it hurt from crying! I feel better today though. I've been sleeping in my daughters twin bed with mounds and mounds of pillows and stuffed animals. It's been so comfy! My feet are elevated on a mound and my upper body is elevated so I'm like in a v shape. When I'm asleep I sleep so deep! When I wake up it feels like its been 10 hours when it's only been 1 or 2. I have noticed that I'm having a lot of nightmares. My husband ran in last night worried because he said I was moaning and making noises. It woke him up! I was having a nightmare, weird. Anyway, I'm hoping as the drugs work out of my body those will go away. I feel pretty good right now and more important clear headed! I think I'm going to go back to sleep on my mounds of pillows!

Well, I go to the dr. Today. I honestly don't want...

Well, I go to the dr. Today. I honestly don't want to go at all!!!! I don't want drains out, I don't want binder off (even though I'm literally black and blue in places) I definitely don't want to see any reaults!! I don't care really about seeing because I know I won't handle the swelling, up high boobs, bruises, etc well at all! I don't really mind the no shower rule either. I've washed my hair and wiped down my body and even shaved. I honestly am not in much pain, I forget to take ibuprofen on time and Ive even off pain meds for 48 hours now. Overall I feel good, but I WANT to be normal soooo bad!!! I want to be able to sleep normal, hold my kids, and drive a car!! My 8 year old son asked me last night if this surgery was a choice or if I had to do it. It broke my heart! I cried!! I was honest and he said he just wished I would heal in a day. He is a very intelligent, very aware, extremely anxious child. He doesn't handle disruptions in his schedule well at all. My 6 year old is fine and happy go lucky! I just have so much guilt and wondering if I did the right thing when he asked me that. I know it will be on his mind all day at school. He's the type that watches the news in the mornings and has since he was about 3. He's like a little adult. So this is affecting him. I know he will get through it though, but its hard. I hate to sound so down because honestly I don't feel too bad and honestly I've cooked my own breakfast for two days ( my choice) and I'm getting around I guess it's that emotional roller coaster. When I sit outside it helps tremendously! anyway, I will update after appointment today! I think one drain will come out but not the other. And to think they almost just put one!! Anyway, my blinds are open, I don't hurt so I wil try and be more positive! Good luck to everyone! And truly thank you for sharing your stories.... It has been a tremendous help. And the encouraging words!!! When I tell my husband about the womn on here, I call you all "my friends."

Appointment went better than expected. I got to...

Appointment went better than expected. I got to loosen my binder and my drains are still in. I go back Friday.

Wow!!! Every day gets better! It's amazing!! I...

Wow!!! Every day gets better! It's amazing!! I don't really sleep- haven't napped in days and wake every couple hours through the night and get up at the crack of dawn because apparently that's my new BM schedule. Lol!! But I don't mind at all because at least I'm going again! Ha! My husband just called me to check on me because this is my first day alone and I told him I swear it feels like the anesthesia wears off more and more every day (my least favorite part!) I'm feeling so much better! I still walk around hunched over and of course there's still some discomfort and pain at night but its all tolerable and the best way to say it is that I finally feel like I'm getting my life back and feeling more human again! Woohoo!!! I know I will have some emotional periods for a while but guys its amazing how much you change and feel better in 24 hours!! Also it has helped setting small goals- like I made it to Monday (4 day post op) my next goal is to make it to my first week (tommorrow!!!) and then I have a goal to walk outside down the street with my son this weekend an I think it's going to happen !! I wouldn't have dreamed it would happened 3 days ago and it might not be far but I think I can go a little bit. My feelings of regret an guilt are fading and wow I just want to cry (shocker!) with how much better I feel!! I'm listening to birds chirp outside and just appreciating that I feel good enough to hear and appreciate it! ( corny I know! Ha!) Anyway, my other updates have been downers so I just wanted to be more positive and let others know that it does get better! Also, some advice tht I have for people a couple months out: train your legs!! They will be your best friend! Spend that time now to train them and make them strong. My legs are very large and powerful ( honestly I've never liked them until now when they've come in handy) even if you don't go to a gym, get an exercise ball and do ball squats against a wall. Anyway, happy healing everyone!!!!

Well, today wasn't a great day. I started my...

Well, today wasn't a great day. I started my period ( and mine are bad) and I'm super bloated and cramping. Usually it's not a big deal, but pairing it with healing sucks. I did get clean this morning, which was exciting! But since then Ive felt like crap. Still way better than 3 days ago, just was hoping for a better day. My stomach is killing me and when I took off my binder to adjust it I realized why I'm hurting.. I'm super swollen. Anyway, I go to the dr tomorrow. I was hoping to get drain out for the weekend but don't see that happening now. Still draining about 30-40 in each drain! Wonder why some people drain more than others? .

Got my drains out today! It does feel good. I also...

Got my drains out today! It does feel good. I also went out to two places (first time in 9 days I have went anywhere but dr. Office.) I realized very quickly that just walking into Publix and grabbing two things is a lot of walking. Very strange. Then, went to the sushi restaurant I go to every week and could only eat 1/3 of what I would normally eat. Bummer!!! I love to eat!!!! Then I came home and crashes for 2 hours! My nights are crappy an I really want to feel rested for my kids so hoping the nap helps. Also, I've been over doing it and paying for it so today when my mom offered help I took her up on it. She's coming later to do laundry and dishes! She's so nice!
Also, I am ready for my appetite back!! My hair is still falling out and I have lost weight. I don't want to lose weight as I figure I need the food to fuel this recovery! I'm good with gaining some weight if it will speed this process up! Well I will post new pic later as my boobs have changed.

Feeling really good today!! Swelling more around...

Feeling really good today!! Swelling more around drain sites since he took them out but nothing alarming. Still trying to take it easy. I can't wait to stand up straight!! I'm still pretty hunched over and I think it's going to be a while before I'm up right. It's hard to see how my boobs look because I am hunching over so much and it makes everything look different. Also, I want to wear real clothes! I thought I would easily fit into some pants of mine that are a little loose but yeah, that didn't happen. Back to pajama pants for me. Well, mainly I'm just super happy to be healing and feeling better! This Saturday beats the heck out of last Saturday!! Hope everyone is healing well! Question; will my boobs get bigger or smaller? Also, mine stick out past my sides a good amount, will that change?

Well, everyday I feel more normal!! Today will be...

Well, everyday I feel more normal!! Today will be my first shower in 10 days!!!!!! Still hunched over and still on ibuprofen all day and night. I am in my bed with lots of pillows for support for my legs and head. I'm sleeping longer now , last night I slept almost 6 hours in a row!! Usually I get up every 2-4 hours. Anyway, it's nice to be feeling more normal and capable of doing more. That's all good news, now the bad...

My husband is sick!!! I'm thinking flu or strep? We will see when I send him to a walk in clinic today.
My son dropped and shattered my iPad!! Well- honestly I'm lucky it never happened to me as I drop it all the time.
Next, my daughter spilled milk all over my laptop and fried it!
Well, it sucks that this is the time they broke because I need those things more now as I am laying around all day! But, it's still not getting to me too much because I'm still so dang excited that I'm feeling better! Now if we can get hubby better too!

Well, I'm feeling good. Still some pain And...

Well, I'm feeling good. Still some pain And uncomfortable sleeping but overall much better! I don't really need ibuprofen or anything for pain any more. I do have swelling at incision above pubic area. My husband says it looks like I'm male. Ha! And when you push on it it looks like a water bed. I went in and nurse looked at it. She said it was a normal amount of fluid an it was gathering there because of gravity. She also said to take it easy so it didn't get worse. Just to clarify I asked specifically about shopping, cleaning, vacuuming, etc. and she said "no." Blah!! Well, I guess I don't want to make it worse and turn it into an issue so I'm trying really hard to rest ( I did mop my floor today ;) oops.... But I couldn't take it anymore! And it's a small area) but now for the rest of the day, my feet are up and honestly I will probably indulge in tv shows that are reality type junk and that I shouldn't admit to watching ( as my husband says) Lol.
I started driving again yesterday! Yay! I needed to be able to take kids to and from school. They are at different schools that start and end an hour apart so unfortunately it is an ordeal taking them and picking them up. But glad I'm back to doing it.
last, I'm afraid my boobs are too big. I'm not devastated or anything but I am not as excited. I didn't want too big but I guess I just was unclear about it all. I didn't realize how small my rib cage was which makes a huge difference!!! I ended up with high profile which i didn't know until after but honestly my rib cage probably couldn't handle any wider? i dont know maybe i don't understand it all? You can't just go off height and weight! I looked at pics of boobs for hours and hours and saw my size 5 '7 / 140 with 400 and 425 and sometimes they looked huge and sometimes not big at all. I wanted a full c or small d but not sure but feel like I'm at least a d. Maybe I'm just not used to them. My husband I think even wishes they were smaller. He keeps saying, wow they are huge and you're gonna get a lot of attention ( which I didn't want them to stand out when I walk in a room) maybe he's just not used to them yet? Maybe when they soften it will help? I wear fitted tees and jeans ALL the time and I think those days might be over :( if these knockers don't settle down. Also, in the very beginning my dr was on the fence about a lift ( the other three consults said yes and he was on the fence) so we decided to try without it. I am anxious to see if I end up back in there with a lift. I used to be a dd when I was heavy, so I had a good amount of skin to fill in an they were saggy. I'm not trying to look perfect but also don't want to sink so much money in an not be happy.
Well, I guess overall I'm happy, just getting all paranoid about monster boobies. Tomorrow I will be over it. That's how this process goes, right?! ;)

Well the weather is gloomy here today and I think...

Well the weather is gloomy here today and I think it's messing with me. I'm just down today. I feel good but have a lot of fluid at incision/ pubic area. I've laid around but it's increased over the last couple days. I've massaged it. I've alternated heat and ice. I'm hoping they drain it Friday! I feel so fat from it! It's presence when I sit down is annoying like when I sat down and had extra skin.
Also, I miss being active! I was excited about a break from the gym but now it's getting to me!!!!!! My muscles tingle! My skin hurts in my legs when I touch it- from bad food and no exercise. I love fitness! I LoVE heavy squats, I love bench press ( you don't see many gals over there) I love powerlifting style dead lifts, I love running, I miss stair climbers, I miss fatigued muscles, I miss that drained feeling in my body that puts me to sleep like a baby at night, I miss pull ups, I miss push ups!
And when I don't work out, I eat crap! The other day I had 2 Cadbury eggs , snickers ice cream, and a bunch of other crap!! Everyday I've eaten crap! My butt looks the worst it's looked in years! I'm weighing a pound less than before surgery but I look really different. I'm bigger and squishy. And that's not helping my poor attitude today. I should be grateful that I feel good enough to want to work out. And I am still grateful that I got to do this. But I guess it's just a blah day. Oh, and my strips are mostly off and the scar is not pretty and it's very irritated from the strips. Raised areas that are red and itchy. I scratched so hard I bruised around an area.
I think Friday will be my turnaround day! If they'll drain this fluid or tell me it's normal an that I can be up an about more. I am so sick of being in my house alone. An I want to go to a grocery store and buy some healthy foods and prep and cook again! My husband gets upset if I'm up doing anything like that! I'm out of fresh fruit and veggies and I hate to ask anyone to go get them for me , especially when I feel capable. My husband has a business to run and taking our kids to their activities at night and just life to take care of so I hate to be like, hey can you stop and get me some blueberries and salad. So for now, we will live off the frozen meals I prepped for this surgery. - thank goodness I did that!!!
I really do feel good, just a crappy emotional day. Thanks for letting me vent y'all!!
If I could have a glass of wine it would help! ;)

Well I went to ps today. I like him a lot but he...

Well I went to ps today. I like him a lot but he seems much more relaxed than most. No breast massage, no scar creams, no real restrictions, no ugly bra anymore. Even said i could vacuum. He said everything looked good. I figure I will trust him but also still take it easy. I don't want to undo everything they did ( which can happen)
I feel good. Swelling SUCkS! I was honestly hoping he would drain it, but he said there was not enough fluid to drain. I have way more of a pooch now than before surgery. And still under pre surgery weight but still not fitting jn clothes. :( But I know it will go away.
I don't really have any pain, just discomfort from time to time and fatigue.
I quit wearing my boob strap a week ago. I don't want my breasts to drop much more so I took it off. My nipples sit lower than I like but I prefer that over pushing the implant down more to make the nipple rise. I knew my nipples would not be in an ideal spot when I chose to not get the lift. I'm okay with that though. I'm not trying to be perfect and they still look good. My husband still thinks they are too big. And he originally said go bigger!! He says they look unnatural on my frame ( I'm tall and thin- hard to tell in my pics) I think he will grow to love em . The nurse and dr both said they are the size they will be and they aren't getting much smaller if any. I think I'm a 36 d. They did say they'll change, just that they are the size they will be pretty much.
I also finally got good from grocery store!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay!!!!!! Fresh produce!!!!!! So happy!! Donut days are over! Lol. Time to clean up my food !! So happy about my fresh food! Well, I have to go back to Nashville tonight for a dinner ( hour drive) so I'm sure I will be a swollen mess again!! But I feel great!!! And I will start walking next week!! Yay!!! All is good!

Well its been 3 weeks and one day since my MM...

Well its been 3 weeks and one day since my MM surgery. I feel so good! I still don't sleep well and oh how I wish I could get under a heavy squat bar or do some push ups- or even walk at a brisk pace, but I know all of that will come!! I am feeling almost normal. I still cant stand completely upright and I still swell ALOT (more now than ever) and I still have some shooting pains and some discomfort but nothing too bad. I pretty much am back to normal life minus the exercise. I clean my house (vacuuming, laundry, everything) I cook, I go shopping, I go up and down stairs, etc. I would definitely say I am more active than if I had a desk job. Yesterday I was out and about from 7:15-5:00 I was at dr office, eating lunch with my new friend from realself :) dropping off kids, picking up kids, gymnastics practice, grocery store, shopping for a gift for a friend.- see life is back to normal! And today I got up and cleaned the house and had lunch with my husband. I just wanted to share all of that boring crap because I remember wondering how long after surgery until I was back to normal. Getting more active and laying around less has seemed to help a ton too! It has helped mentally and also it just gets me out and not thinking about healing and the pain.
The biggest complaint I have is not being able to wear my clothes and dressing in sweats ALL THE TIME! It's half my fault and half swelling- as being lazy and not working out makes me want to eat bad.- so I have. I haven't really gained weight- still weighing in my normal range but my body is super squishy and larger. Ha! I know better than to weigh myself and to get worried about it all because I will get back into shape quickly and it'll all be fine. But also- I want to dress in cute clothes with my new body and yet I cant- because they don't fit and because this binder adds ALOT of bulk , oh yeah plus the spanx!
well- I will add pics tomorrow because the belly is so FULL right now and I def don't want to be taking any pics! I just had sushi - ALOT of it! Lol! I pretty much look the same as last week but I will post tomorrow. (can't post pics tonight because I have a dessert date with my son- and I'd say my belly is gonna stay big today!) Happy healing to everyone!!!

Feeling great!!! And I got into my jean...

Feeling great!!! And I got into my jean today!!!!!!!!!! They're tight, but they're on!!!! Woohoo!!

Well I got a new laptop and apparently I can't...

Well I got a new laptop and apparently I can't work it because this is my third attempt at updating today.
I am 4 weeks and a day since my MM. I feel great! There is some discomfort from time to time but that's it. I would compare it to having a period (not pain and cramps wise) but you know how most of your period you don't even think about your period, but then some parts are like, man this is a pain in the ass. LOL. I feel like I have good energy levels and don't tire as easily as I expected at this point. I will say, the elliptical kicked my butt and I did feel like I overdid it the other day after my workout and then I had a super busy 14 hours that day. I felt kinda puny that night.
I saw PS today. He said I can wear ANY bra and even go without at night. He is a very relaxed surgeon it seems. He let me start vacuuming weeks ago. I am SO HAPPY I went with him. I am very pleased with my results. I feel like he did a great job. If I ever did any procedure in the future (no plans to) I would definitely go to him. I highly recommend him if you live in middle Tennessee. And the entire staff at Vanderbilt is amazing. They provide everything you need and always greet you with a smiling face when you come in. It is very comfortable and welcoming.
One issue that I have had is that my husband doesn't love the new me. This has been VERY hard.It is very tough to go through all of this and then your husband doesn't find you attractive. He supported me in this from day one. He went to appointments, changed my drains, he looked at so many breasts online that even he got tired of boobs! Neither of us expected this response. He said he loves my results and they are exactly what we asked for- but that it just isn't me. He misses the old me. He told me all along that he loved me the way I was but that he supported me in this since I wanted it and since we thought it would help my confidence (which it has). Since we had a long talk about it all things are getting better. He even looked at my boobs in a good way today! I do think in 6 months we will both be used to the new me. It will be our new normal.
I am glad I did this. I like that when I tried on bikinis the other day, they all looked good!- usually swim suit shopping is torture! I like that when I crawl into bed there isn't excess skin hanging down, I like that I am happier and more confident. I honestly look in the mirror less now than before surgery. I don't nitpic at my flaws now.
For all those waiting and healing- the time will FLY!!!

New pics. I think my boobs settled so fast because...

New pics. I think my boobs settled so fast because I use to be a dd. ( before kids) not sure though?
Wish they were softer!

My dumb ol husband! Lol! My boobies aren't too big...

My dumb ol husband! Lol! My boobies aren't too big at all!!! I finally got sized and I'm a 34d/36c ( in between) at VS. exactly where I wanted to be! Silly man has me all self conscious for nothing! :)

So I had my first real workout today!! I worked...

So I had my first real workout today!! I worked legs and did some cardio. Honestly, I probably did too much as i ran into a friend and finished up with her. I was there about an hour and a half. I did light weights and just focused on tension in the muscles i was targeting. It felt great ( and burning legs and shaking legs, Lol) I have no swelling so far from it and now I'm relaxing and drinking my green tea.
I don't have much swelling anymore. My bigger issue is when I over eat (which I do alot!) it hurts and pushes everything out. You'd think if learn! Lol.
I'm so excited that Thursday I will be the magic 6 weeks post op number! For me, that's huge! It went by so much faster than I expected! I'm so happy about that!
I wear binder at all times still, but this week I might take breaks from it here and there- while relaxing. I wear underwire bra during the day and no bra at night. I still have pain in a specific part of abdomen especially when I stretch in the morning. Sneezing is still a tiny bit uncomfortable. I also don't have 100 percent feeling/ sensitivity in abdomen below bb.
My boobs are still firm but have softened alot the last couple days. I have complete feeling in them. One still hurts if you massage or push it up. One thing I didnt expect, you can feel the actual implant and move it around. It's weird . I had no real breast tissue so that might be why I feel it more? My friend says she can grab hers too though an she's had them for years
My husband is doing better with it. He says I have a hot body, but still says he wouldn't do it again.he still misses old me. It's all good though, at least he saying its a rockin hot bod now. Ha!!! I'll take it. I'm glad I did it. I feel so much more confident and comfortAble. I have forgotten my old body, this all feels normal now. It's pretty cool!!!! I want to wear sexy lingerie now! Thats why I did this- confidence. Mission accomplished.

Everything is good!! Posted new pic, in...

Everything is good!! Posted new pic, in underwear!!! Yes, I own them! Lol!! Other pics would suggest otherwise. Ha!
Overdid it at gym this week, but still all Is good... Just have to learn to ease back in. Can't wait to be able to stretch again!- like really stretch out. Boobs are getting softer and are still changing.
All is good, and I'm happy I did this. It's fun to like your body :)

I have a question guys for those going without...

I have a question guys for those going without binders? I'm 6 and a half weeks out from mm.
When I go without binder for too long ( 2-3 hours) I have pain in abdomen ( like muscle pain) and also as I go without, it seems like my bowels are all messed up. I get gassy, cramps like before i go to the bathroom, like im constipated or something? Like the other day, I went without for 3 hours in the morning and 3 more in the afternoon and I got sick feeling, like I was going to throw up, sweaty face nd all! i put on the binder and felt better within hours. I know it's bothering me to go without the binder. Even at night, if I try to go without I wake in pain. Does this happen to everyone else? Is it because I'm still numb and not contracting muscles in belly to help move things along?? ( does that Even make sense?)
I don't have much swelling at all and the pain isn't unbearable. I'm just curious if this happens with everyone else?

So, everything is great!!! Any depression type...

So, everything is great!!! Any depression type issues have been much better the last 4 days!!!! I'm not usually emotional, so that was an unexpected doozy!
Feeling good mostly! Working out! Life is pretty much normal!
I swell, but not too much at all.
My only concern: my boobs- I hope that I made the right choice going without the lift! I can always get it later ( like in a year or two!!)
Ps said my breasts naturally sit low on chest. I like them now, but don't want much more movement! We will see! I'm still happy I did this. The further out I get, the happier I am I did it! Husband is doing better with it all too! Still says he wishes he'd got a Harley instead of this surgery (hahaha!! I'm not!) but I'm glad I did it and he's coming around! :)
Happy healing y'all!!!!!!!

Okay, the last 2 days my right breast has a dent...

Okay, the last 2 days my right breast has a dent in it. It's very hard to see unless I point it out. If I flex my pecs, you know where to look and you can watch the muscle contract and look all nasty over both breasts. But unflexed, the right one still has a dent where the muscle is over the implant. Also, it feels like its moving and even falling down with every movement ( right one only) . Is this normal? Anyone else experienced this? I'm calling ps first thing in the it because I opted out of lift and indeed needed it?

Well, I'm glad I did this MM. The other day I was...

Well, I'm glad I did this MM. The other day I was in a crappy "I'm getting fat"kinda mood and I went in a store an tried on bikinis. I left the store in the best mood ever!!!!!! Seriously, all 5 looked amazing! I think we all know tht bikini shopping before a MM SUCKS and use to would've sent me to a bakery to drown my sorrows. Ha!! Not now! It was my best day of- "heck yeAh!!! I'm so gla I did this!!!!!" I called my husbnd so thrilled!! I also realized tht I need to stop being so damn ungrateful. I swore that after my surgery I would love my body , yet lately I've found myself criticizing my less tight, flabbier body. ( Havibg to take workouts easier)I realize tht I was being ungrateful and I need to love my new bod! So I am choosing to be grateful and not obsess over other little things... If I continue to criticize then this was all for nothing and I will never be happy.
I still have some pains in abdomen. All along its been in the same place ( at or above belly button to the right. It'll heal, and it's not too bad - I just HAVE to take it easier. I went to dr and he said don't activate core so much. No abs, but also don't activate it much in other workouts. I tried to jump back in and do circuit style workouts and lot of walking lunges ( LOTS) and controlled step ups all that takes a good amount of core. So I am laying off of it all and just trying to heal. Still walking but staying out of gym a bit longer. I feel like I'm on the verge of being healed up and then I go in an screw it up and set myself back each workout.
Boob dent- dr coul not see it until I flexed and showed him. He said not to nit pick and it'll fix itself. We all get so worked up over these imperfections.
Anyway, all is good! I am pretty much normal. I mow, shop, walk an hour a day, don't swell super bad, dont get tired anymore etc.. I'm glad I did this. It was just a little part out of my life tht I had some discomfort and changes an now I have this body that I am excited about and that pain and not being able to do things Is over and just a memory. I added a pic but there's not too much change in me.

Well I think I'm 12 weeks now! It flies by!!! Life...

Well I think I'm 12 weeks now! It flies by!!! Life is normal. I'm back to working out 5 days a week. I still cannot do push ups or anything that really takes Much core. It feels like you are ripping me apart! Other than that, I'm doing stadium runs, lunges, most weights, etc. I hate how you can see and feel the pec muscles flex over the implants. Blah! But I'm still glad and they are such an improvement that I don't are too much.
I can sleep on belly more now! Kinda. Haha! My belly is still half numb and the other half feels like I have a mild sunburn if you touch it. Anyway- just checking in. :)
Happy healing to all the girls going in now- time will fly!

It's been 12 weeks!!!!!! Wow! I'm so glad did this...

It's been 12 weeks!!!!!! Wow! I'm so glad did this MM! I love my body now- and I NEVER have before. I don't mind the couple stretch marks I have left or the cellulite.
I still can't do ab work- ps said at least 6 months plus every time I do anything that engages my core too much it really hurts!! Even rolling over in bed still kinda hurts. Push ups feel like I'm being ripped down my upper abs!! I'm still healing, and that's okay with me. This is a process, but the hard part is behind me now.

Almost 5 months po.

Everything is great! Still have swelling and pain and discoloration in abdomen if I push to hard on my workouts- but it all goes away with a day of rest. Does that happen to anyone else? My belly in the middle turns all white and splotchy. It does go away but it's weird. I sometimes worry about my breasts- as one is lower and they are still asymmetrical. The dr told me they would be without a lift. I'm still so much happier with them and try to ignore it. I know eventually (in years) I will get a lift and they can work on it then. They still look good.
I wore a bikini for the first time in 13 years last week!!!! My confidence is soooo much better!!! - in the gym I don't worry about my belly showing, in the bedroom I feel sexy, and swim suit shopping is actually fun! I'm so glad I did this! I worried and stressed sooo sooo much! And it goes by in the blink of an eye.
My scar is still quite red and pronounced. It will fade though. Honestly, it just becomes normal and part of you. My breasts have no real visible scars. The breasts incisions are thin and blend with nipples.
I still can't do abs and push ups hurt. I swell if I drink too much alcohol. It is a process and I see what they mean about a year for full recovery. I still feel pretty much normal and am so glad I did this. :)

1 year and one month PO

Well- it's been a year. I am so glad I did this. I really love my body. And honestly- I've put on about 5 pounds since surgery. Also- one boob settled more than the other. But through all of this- I realized that we all have "flaws" and little imperfections and I could pick it apart forever and never be happy. Well- a mommy makeover is hell (not gonna lie) and it's not fair to obsess over the little things when I went through all that. I LOVE and am so appreciative that we had the financial means to do this and the support from my husband and family. It's also easier (to be honest) to accept the 5 extra pounds when I have pretty boobs and a flat tummy. Lol. The loose skin and deflated boobs no longer stand out in the mirror.
Anyway- I do still have abdominal pain during some exercises. I still swell in the lower abdomen. My scar has faded so so much and it doesn't bother me or my husband at all!!! It's part if me now and my journey- just like the stretch marks were. One boob is lower and more settled than the other but doesn't look bad. I probably will have to get a lift one day (needed to anyway when I went into this Mm)- but for now I'm in no rush. They still look good.
Also- I will tell anyone about my surgery. I'm open about it. At first I was embarrassed. Now- I'm proud that I had the guts to do it and it's my choice. I like my body- and not many people say that- so yeah I'm proud that I made the effort to change that.
The MM was a huge thing for me... hUGE!!! But I am so glad I did it. I would post a pic- and maybe will next week- but I never take them anymore and honestly I'm too lazy to take one now. Haha! Good luck and happy healing y'all!!
Nashville Plastic Surgeon

I researched top plastic surgeons in the southeast United Sates and then I also researched plastic surgeons that offer Cosmetassure insurance. I had a friend that had a procedure and had complications. Her complications ended up costing almost $300,000. She had cosmetassure and they covered all of it! Actually, I was originally scheduled for surgery with another Dr. but when she told me her story and my Dr. said that he didn't and wouldn't provide the insurance- I changed Dr's. I was out my $500 scheduling fee- but I think it was worth it- I feel much better now knowing that if something were to happen- my family wont suffer as bad financially. I know its rare- but it can happen and my insurance was crystal clear that they would not cover ANYTHING (even if I'm on my death bed) that could be related to an elective procedure. Vanderbilt offers the insurance and so far I LOVE the staff.

5 out of 5 stars Overall rating
5 out of 5 stars Doctor's bedside manner
5 out of 5 stars Answered my questions
5 out of 5 stars After care follow-up
5 out of 5 stars Time spent with me
5 out of 5 stars Phone or email responsiveness
5 out of 5 stars Staff professionalism & courtesy
5 out of 5 stars Payment process
5 out of 5 stars Wait times
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