5 Days Post Explant Saline Under Muscle for 15 Years - Rupture on Right Side 42 Years Old TN

I am no longer sexy. What a relief!!!! LOL I don't get hit on or inappropriately flirted with..... I am on purpose and happy and full of energy and people look at my face not my chest. It's really amazing to be respected and appreciated for me and I think people like me better as just me- the interactions with strangers are different...like life changing different and I just noticed it today and went "hey! this is pretty cool!!!" I'm moving into the old/new me and starting to feel pretty comfortable with it. I feel excited to discover what the next season of life is going to look like :)

One month....it feels like an eternity since I finally got my implants removed. I do feel so much better and my life is twice as productive with half the energy expended. I don't feel exhausted all the time and my mind seems to be so much clearer - which is good because farming requires a lot of multi tasking! Projects I never had the energy for are getting done easily in a day and I am beginning to forget how horrible I felt for so many years. It is an adjustment getting used to the dip in my chest where implants used to be and my breasts seem to look different every time I look at them. I have struggled with my opinion of them now that I am beginning to physically feel better it seems I am more judgemental of myself. When one ruptured and I was sick as a dog I just wanted them out and now that I feel pretty good I catch myself feeling kind of homely and scrawny without the implants. Truth is there are things about them that I really liked and l am sorting that out with myself when it comes to feeling good physically and having a positive self image not based on some fiction we all have bought into about what it is to have a great body. My confidence is shifting to feeling good about myself for different reasons and the old thought pattern can creep in when I look in the mirror. It is amazing to me how much this plastic surgery barbie mentality has consumed the women of our country and I feel strongly for all of us that we need to reclaim our self worth and our wallets and learn to love our natural bodies and embrace the journey of life without putting all this junk into ourselves that makes us feel horrible and sick because we feel less than perfect. I believe this kind of thinking is very dangerous and I myself was a victim of it and am working to break free of the lie that we all have to have a certain type of plastic body in order to be attractive. When I am moving through my day doing my work and not dwelling on my appearance I feel really energetic, centered, and on purpose - my life is less of a struggle. I do still have some rebuilding to do with my homeopathic doctor and that will be a process. In the meantime I am really happy to be where I am today and glad I got them out of my body because they were absolutely making me sick, exhausted and killing my joy because my body was working so hard to fight the influx of toxins and mold from the implants it was hard to focus. The next battle is becoming conscious of changing my mind about what I expect my body to look like and what I can embrace as true beauty.

wow has it only been 2 weeks? My life has improved so much I can't begin to ezplain it but I'll try and appreciate the million little things that are better now that the poison bags are out of my body... I am so much more relaxed - my chest isn't tight all the time. I don't grind my teeth at night like I used to. My skin is a better color - yea my natural pigment changed! I don't lay awake worrying about every little detail of my life anymore. My basic balance is better. I have more patience amd I don't feel like I'm in a hurry all the time. I don't feel exhausted and drained like I used to. I am not panicked or overwhelmed by life like I used to be. My memory is improving and my expectations of myself are more realistic. I had NO idea how much of my life was affected by he implants and honestly was not expecting to have so much clarity after having them removed. Of course until one ruptured I didn't think they were making me sick either so the whole ordeal was really an unexpected journey for me. Today enjoying my life every day is top priority and I am aware of not burdening myself with things that don't matter. I feel like I've been brought back from near death and it feels good to feel good. My breasts are definately going through changes as they settle in - some days they look dehydrated and the next day they perk up. I suppose they have their own journey as well (hopefully not a journey south lol). The most important point for me to stay focused on is my health. It's easy to fall back into a judgemental trap when I look at myself and then I look again as a person with wisdom and remind myself that those scars are there to remind me that life is precious and taking care of my body is my responsibility- the reward is feeling wonderful every day and what is that worth?