I have waited over 20 years for this... saved the...
I have waited over 20 years for this... saved the $$ twice now and have had 3 consults. I spent my previous boobies fund on down payment for a house, new carpeting & flooring, and finally because Im turning 40 ghis year, Im doing this. Like others I have read about, I have heard negativity, scrutiny, and that Im being vain & selfish, but Im to the point finally that I really deserve this since Ive waited 20 years. I have a mammogram this a.m. and my date is set, so as long as nothing comes up, I will be having surgery in a month... Im crossing my fingers all goes well... quit smoking, eat very healthy, and work out so Im definitely working for this... Im scared though... of surgery, of judgment, of spending the money, of a botched job, or bad results or health issues...
Cant think of anything else but my boobs...
Im totally obsessed with information... reading as much as I can, looking at hundreds of pics, and trying to not stress out because I dont want anything bad to keep me from doing this in the next 28 days... Ive finally decided to do this and my worrysome self keeps thinking something will get messed up... I havent told hardly a soul except my best friend whos taking me and Ive finally just told my boyfriend of five years... hes excited (of course) and understands my obsession and is always supportive and great, but I still feel so nervous and scared... I plan on posting some before pics before the big day but I almost dont want to jinx myself yet... Lol. Yep, a little neurotic, I know... ugh. I wish it was tomorrow so I could stop feeling so anxious...
Its getting closer and I see that others have posted wish pics... I am getting up the nerve to post my pre-operative pics, but I am so self conscious about my yucky boobs! LOL. Anyway, I found some pics that I am hoping to have a similar look or result
Its Finally March! 23 days and counting!
Well, Im going crazy with the waiting... did the rice test, which I have to admit worked pretty slick to my surprise! Worried about going too big, not big enough, looking fat or like a stripper... According to my calculations, Im looking at 300 to 325 ccs, but will see what my PS says next week. Im going subglandular, so not worried about compression- just worried about filling in the deflated space. Ive finally told my daughter- shes a senior in HS and is not surprised and has known Ive wanted them her whole life (since she nursed them flat) Lol. Shes supportive but young and a bit critical because shes always had large nice breasts since puberty (36-38C). She didnt inherit my small breasts (Thank God, she says).
But, Im getting anxious. Working out like a fiend to try and drop 5 more pounds prior to my surgery since it looks like working out will be on hold for a few weeks. Its been helpful to read others' stories, their journals, and be privy to their personal experiences. Not sure if it makes me more cautious, anxious, or excited- which none of those things are bad. I have definitely come up with more questions in the past week for my PS and at this point am hoping nothing comes up between now and the big day...
The suspense is killing me! Lol!
Well, my final appt (hopefully) is Monday and Im chompin at the bit because this has been the only time Ive actually wanted time to fly by... I think Im going to talk to my PS about different sizing between 325cc and 375cc... kI dont want to look like a stripper but then again, Ive seen some gorgeous strippers! Plus, kinda want my $$ worth... trying to get things in order, plan ahead, been buying lots of stuff and keeping busy so the time goes... really should be working out double time to prepare for the weeks that I cant after... so many thoughts... but I will say, I love reading the stories and get excited for everyone when they have their surgeries and are thrilled with the results! I hope Im equally thrilled too. Took some before pics but will have to redo since they were on my phone and I had to delete before uploading as I was at the salon getting my hair done and almost showed my gal the pics on accident when trying to pull up the haircolor I wanted! Haha!
OMG, CAN IT PLEASE BE MARCH 26TH!!??
Yikes. I think my boyfriend thinks Im a ginormous pervert... Really looking at pics I like. Saw one today that is perfect on someone else's wish pics... LOVE the results!
Good appointment today!
Went for my last appt today- presurgery, its 2 weeks away! Discussed all of my concerns, questions, research, and hope with my PS and shes so great, was thrilled that I tried the rice test (she never heard of it) & thought the online community thing was great esp. since I knew my stuff well! We chose 360cc Allergan Natrelle textured silicone, for subglandular placement. She prefers submuscular placement but said Ive got the required amount of tissue for subglandular and she understood why I wanted them so she said okay. Was disappointed that I will have to stay overnight after surgery in a hotel, but the hospital is over an hour away, they do next day postop, and would prefer that Im close the first night in case I have bleeding or problems, so I guess hotel it is... my boyfriend is disappointed because he cant take work off so he wont see me until the next day :( Awwww.... Lol. My best friend will take good care of me & Im so excited that everything is a GO! Now the next 2 weeks need to fly by for me! Hurry up and wait, right?!? Ive got several things to do so maybe itll go faster than I think... hahaha, wishful thinking!
My PS said 34B is probably stretching it a little... morelike a 34 A-B... hahaha!
Stats and pre-op pics finally... Yikes...
So I am finally posting some pre-op pics since surgery is 9 days away and its getting closer to the big day where they won't look like this anymore (Thank God)... No amount of tanning seems to make them look perkier so I'm going to have to rely on my PS to fix this for me... LOL. I took some pics and I am thoroughly freaked out by how my boobs look but I never stare at them, nor have I photographed them or wanted them to be photographed... Although I will say that I did plenty of "flashing" back in the ol' party days and I'm still asking myself "Girl, What the hell were you thinking?!?" but can't change that. So here it is and I am forcing myself to get over the weirdness of taking pics of my breasts- especially since I've seen so many pics of other people's breasts, I suppose it makes sense and in order to compare the results in 9 days, I've got to have the baseline pics.
Age: 39 years young
Current size: 34B- but my doc says more on the A side
Surgery Date: 3/26/14
Allergan Silicone Implants Subglandular on each side (I don't care that my lefty is a little bigger than my righty- but my PS said she will determine what she will do that day depending on how the sizers look)
oops forgot size implants in my update
That would actually be Allergan Silicone Implants 360cc Sub-glandular on each side
4 days until new boobies!
I have to admit, the time came up faster than I thought it would... Surgical nurse called me yesterday to give me last minute instructions, my time to be there on Wednesday, and to answer questions. I've got everything I need... I'm a diehard shopaholic and have bought a lot of stuff from different types of bras to creams and oils, to pillows, ice bags and types of tumblers with straws built-in, to lounge wear and heal-friendly clothing. I have our hotel reservation made since my PS insists I stay close the first night which I picked an extended stay suites hotel because its large, has a kitchen, HD tvs, satellite channels, and a couch and recliner. My best friend can work out or swim or hot tub it while Im resting if she gets bored and with our own kitchen, I can have my own food and teas since I only eat whole, non-gmo foods and have to have my teas. My boyfriend/partner is sad that he has to work, and even more disappointed that I have to stay down there. My daughter is disappointed too, she was going to head down when shes done with her last class but I dont want her to miss school on Thursday because she graduates this year and just got home a couple days late and missed school from her Spring Break trip. So its gonna be another adventure for me and my bestie (which we've been besties for 19 years) that we will talk about when we're in the nursing home :)
I've got a very busy schedule these next few days- I paced out things to do so I wouldnt be sitting and waiting- I made an appt for our dog to go to the vet, grocery shop, have to clean our house in all the spots my boyfriend and daughter don't do since my sis and her family are coming three days after my surgery to stay and visit, and I booked a spa day with a facial and massage so I can be relaxed and calm the day before...
Well, I suppose I should get motivated today and get some stuff done... going to clean the fridge and freezer out and re-organize and rotate the chest freezer (we buy, raise, or hunt our own local, organic meats and fish), re-pot some of my wildly growing plants, check my starter plants for our garden- my peppers dont seem to be growing... then probably go for a walk. I hope everyone in boobie land or whos dreaming of boobie land has a super fantastic weekend!!!
Two more days! Starting to panic a little...
Wow. Getting a little anxious. Cant keep busy enough to keep my mind off things but wow, Im kickin ass on getting stuff done! Im so worried about not having anything to drink after midnight on Tuesday... I probably drink a gallon of water everyday throughout the day in addition to my morning coffee, my mid-morning matcha tea, my pau d'arco noon tea, my afternoon matcha, and my evening detox tea so... Im going to be THIRSTY and off my schedule! Im worried about dehydration! Esp since my surgery is at 11:30! I can go without eating, but water is another story... ugh. I was pissy yesterday because I was waiting for a package and it has my new slippers (the slide on, furry hard-soled kind you can wear outside) and our weekend mailperson apparently was too lazy to get out of the car so they left a pick up card in the mailbox.... so now I have to go to town, wait in line at the post office on a Monday, to get it... our regular mailperson is awesome- he always comes to the house with my packages... anyway, I suppose I will get motivated and start cleaning and organizing the spare closet... lol. We got tons done yesterday- it was busy busy! My boyfriend and I did a lot and hes been great at keeping my mind occupied!
I CANT BELIEVE TOMORROW IS THE DAY!!!
OMG! Its finally tomorrow! So excited, scared, nervous, overjoyed... all of the above! Been busy running errands. Got huge steaks for tonight, getting household stuff done ahead of time, and all set and packed. Tomorrow at this time I'll be on my way to Boobieville!!! Woooooo Hooooo! It only took me twenty years to make my decision final! This is better than graduating from college was- and that was huge for me! I was excited, but not as excited as I am now! Hahaha! And it cost me far less than college! Lol!
TODAY IS THE DAY!
26 Mar 2014
Day of treatment
I thought I would be more nervous than I am today- I am feeling pretty calm and excited at the same time. We are leaving earlier today (in about an hour) than we were supposed to, the surgery nurse called and said they were bumping me up two hours- its about an hour, hour and half drive, so we are leaving much earlier than we planned but that is okay. So I am going to switch the laundry out, say goodbye to my daughter as she leaves for school, and get my bag in the car and wait for my best friend to arrive... We shall see you all on the flip side with boobies!!!
Surgery Day/ Boobie Day
26 Mar 2014
Day of treatment
Today was good, been resting and post op bandage removal in the a.m. Will post pics and a real update tomorrow when I get home...
Post Op Day One
I am finally home and resting on my couch. Yesterday was fine as long as I kept up on my pain meds. My right breast is sore and left one is good. They look great so far, I don't think reality has set in yet for me. Not having too much struggle yet, but the right side is sore and the tingling and burning is sharp at times when pain meds start wearing off. My arm pits are sore, it feels as if I have been doing planks for hours and my muscles feel tight. I can shower tonight and can't wait to try to get all the weird, sticky gross film off my skin... It looks gross and is itchy.
l arrived and was getting prepped. I knew I would be dehydrated, which I was, so there was quite a bit of trouble finding a vein for the IV so after being poked a bunch on each hand, I finally started getting fluids... My blood pressure for some reason had been a little elevated- they thought maybe it was nerves or because of the IV problems... Went in and don't remember a damn thing past saying hello to the anesthesiologist and the other two surgery nurses... Woke up in recovery and was thirsty and sore. I was shaking so bad- from the drugs, I think. I was shaking so bad and couldn't control it which was awful... I drank five cups of water and was trying to breathe slowly, my best friend was there and she was all excited, I was so shaky, I just started crying and felt like a total idiot because I was crying and not even sure why except that I felt weird, shaky and emotional. My blood pressure was so high, they kept giving me pain meds- it was 168/114 and not dropping fast at all which was freaking me out really bad. It finally started dropping and then about an hour later, we were allowed to go. We went to the hotel suite and I was feeling tons better and was starving like a maniac. I ate a bag of Caesar salad and some pizza rolls... Took my pain meds every four hours, had no nausea, and felt good and slept great, only getting up to take my pain meds and go to the bathroom. Post Op appointment this morning was good. They removed the bandages and checked my incisions. They said everything looked great, fitted me with a bra, gave me an extra one, and set next appointment. See my Dr review for info about Drs and staff, they really do a lot for patients which surprised me.
I'm feeling pretty good except for right breast being sore but as long as I'm not all moving around, it's okay. Feels better in the bra for sure and they said no underwires for 6 weeks but any other bras are fine. They look really good but I'm waiting to evaluate until they're not as swollen...
Feeling sore and dealing with annoying pain...
My evening went well. My daughter, bless her heart, spent a half hour using the removal lotion, alcohol, and almond oil to get nearly all of the sticky gross goop and marks off my skin before my shower. She said she thought Id be much older when she had to give me my first 'sponge bath' and tried to joke around to make me laugh. She thinks they look great and keeps telling me that its only been one day and that I need to relax and not expect to heal overnight since she knows Im annoyed with the pain on my right side. I feel old or something because Im sure not healing as quick as I thought I would, Ive never been a big baby about anything and really dont like to need help, but my right boob is slowing me down and is sore sore sore. My skin feels so tight, the side burns like Ive pulled a muscle, and my nipple feels so sensitive that it super angry at me :( I just want to feel good and normal.
Day 2 pics
Still swollen on the right side but it's way better today than yesterday... Looks better though. My implant card says that I have Natrelle Silicone 115 with 354cc on left and 378cc on right...
Day 3 post op
I am definitely feeling very sore, swollen, and tight mainly on the right side... its making me irritable, emotional, and frustrated because the left side feels great so Im starting to get worked up and worried that something is wrong. My boyfriend and my daughter keep telling me to relax and that its only been 3 days, but Im trying and the bothersome pain keeps me thinking about it... my sister and her family will be here in a couple hours, I didnt want to be all slow moving and whiney but its looking like I cant help it now. Was going to run into town to do errands but my side is sore and the thought of going anywhere is not appealing at all... went for a ride yesterday with my boyfriend and Im pretty sure I overdid it which might be why Im miserable now... Im not the type of person who sits still, can kick back and relax, and its making me sad and annoyed that I just want to take more pain pills and sleep... plus Im struggling with wanting to jump my boyfriend's bones- really horned up, not sure why so bad other than I know I cant, and he's staying far away from me cuz he's struggling with wanting to jump my bones too... hahaha. Damn hormones. Just want my sis to get here soon so she can entertain me and maybe play some cards to keep me from thinking about my sore boob and my out of control libido. On the bright side, they look amazing and I want to just stare at them, its funny cuz my daughter thinks theyre awesome and cant stop staring either. Hahaha. My boyfriend is forcing himself not to stare too much since he can hardly stand that I cant even hug him on the right side. Ive paced out my pain pill schedule and will hardly make it through Monday which is when I can call for refills... I hope the sore side starts improving or else this weekend with company is going to be hard- even if it is just my sis, her husband, and kids.
Day 4 post Op. Much better today, hopefully...
So far I didn't wake up with a ton of pain and actually slept good without getting up taking Percocet. They look much better, let's Hope that they stay good today and that my pain level is getting better since it's Day 4.
Day 5 Post Op
Called the PS office and they are going to see me this week since I'm struggling with the right side being hard and painful... My back and neck are very sore on that right side as well, probably from curling my shoulder forward all the time when I have the soreness, tightness, and spasms on that right side. I would've drove the hour drive to be seen today if we weren't expecting a snow storm but my PS will be in my town in a couple days So they said it could wait since I don't want to drive. If they felt as good as they looked, I'd be in heaven. I love them and how pretty they are looking, just wish I could stand up straight with my shoulders straight without pain...
Its been one week and I had to go in... Not good
Well, as you can tell from my last entries, I was complaining a lot and feeling soreness and pain... I finally went in to see my Dr. and she said that it was NOT normal for me to have the pain I am having and that I am NOT losing my mind. Apparently I have a lot of inflammation on that right side, underneath I suppose, and its pushing the implant outwards from under my breast tissue because of the swelling. So the bump that I feel on the armpit side is indeed my implant pushing out the side... UGH. She said it should relax back into place once the inflammation subsides and put me on Toradol for inflammation and pain. In the meanwhile, she told me to not be overdoing anything, to get a lot of fluids and rest, and to try and relax even though she knows that I'm a freak and can't stand sitting still, much less knowing there might be an issue with my implant... its hard for me to sleep, relax, rest, or even sit around with the pain I am having and its radiating into my neck, back, and shoulder- because the inflammation is putting pressure on my blood vessels and my nerve endings- which is why I am feeling it so tough. I just feel better because I knew I wasn't a giant pain baby- I had two children with no pain meds and have never had pain issues... But I am not happy that my damn boob is so inflamed that its pushing out the side of my armpit. Its not horrible and you can't see it, but I can feel it and now I am going to be paranoid about it being pushed out further... Yikes. The real lesson I learned is that if you have a question, any concerns, or if something just doesn't feel right- call and go in. Its better to be safe than sorry, its better to know than to drive yourself crazy, and you pay a lot of money for their expertise, so they can work you in since its a big investment...
Two weeks Post Op
Well I'm two weeks Post Op today and things have improved drastically so I'm hoping that the worst of my worries are over... Not going to count my chickens though... Steri-strips fell off and my scars/stitches are a little itchy. They are softening up and certainly my poor skin is stretching and feeling really tight. I've been using Bio Oil and alternate it with coconut oil throughout the day. The skin between my breasts is the tightest now, but I can squish my boobs together and move them around a bit. My damn nipples are the most trouble. I think after nursing both my kids, I must've lost a lot of sensitivity because I never felt too much and now just brushing against my shirt or the bed sheets hurts! I go without my bras at night and sometimes a little during the day, the compression from wearing a bra drives me nuts So my PS said it's ok to go without when I'm at home and not doing anything requiring support. My next appt is next week and we will go over my scar regimen and stitches will be removed I'm sure. They're looking good and right now I'm still thinking it's been worth it although my final feelings with be when I'm at least not having any pain, they soften up more, and I can move around without being ultra sensitive to anything coming near my investment. For the first time ever, last night I put on new jammies after my shower, and the top is way too small!! Weird!!! Lol!
Almost five weeks post op and doing great
Its been almost five weeks and its going well. My soreness is gone for the most part, other than occasional stiffness feeling after having a busy day. The swelling has pretty much subsided, Im thinking how they look now is what theyre going to be. I have not been formally measured, but am wearing a 34 D, could be in a 34 DD, but Ive bought a few 34 D bras and the feel fine. My one month appt went well, the PS said to make sure I was massaging my scars so they dont get hardened, been massaging my scars and my breasts and theyre soft, moveable, bouncy, and pain free. At times, I feel like I shouldve gone a little bigger, but I know its because I am getting used to the size and I look again at all of my new bras (&the old ones in a bag in my closet) and remember that they are huge and look great compared to before. Haha. I have been removing all the wires carefully from my new bras and putting them in a baggie, my PS said to stay away from underwires for 6 months to promote good scar healing (wires rub on scars and create thickening-like callous skin) but said to remove them out of the cute, sexy bras then put them back later. Easy enough and since underwire is for support and lift, I find that my breasts are pretty perky and fine in the bras with the underwire removed, plus theyre comfortable and still sexy and pretty so who knows if I'll even put the wires back?!? Its been a learning experience, Im happy so far with results, and my boyfriend loves them and cant keep his hands off- neither can I... Lol.
Pretty much healed- Nothing too new or exciting really
Well- its been nearly six weeks. I am back to working out although I am being somewhat careful since I've been reading about other people's slight mishaps with overdoing it. Definitely measured wrong as far as bra sizing- pretty sure I am a 34DD or DDD since all the 34D bras barely cover my girls and I get the "overage" which you can see through my shirts sometimes- which is a welcomed sight. LOL. Gave my 34D bras to my daughter- which she loves pretty undies like me, so she will wear them and take care of all of them well. Not many changes- I could post pics, but they look the same pretty much... Like big boobs. My scars are nearly completely healed, they just need to fade some more which I have been massaging every day and using bio oil and scar therapy oil- they are fading fast, but not faded away yet. Went to see my sis who saw them the weekend of my surgery and she was amazed at how natural they look and said she might consider it too since she's an A cup... Just need the weather to get nice so I can wear some clothes that accentuate my goodies since its been chilly and still sweater and sweatshirt/coat weather... Every day they are softer, less swollen, and I think they are pretty much going to be the way they looked last week in the pics I posted since they don't seem to be changing a lot. I have to remind myself- that when I get used to them a little, I think they seem small- then I put on a bra and am reminded that I'm busting out of the bra and haven't experienced that since I was nursing my second child over 17 years ago... Which is cool because I feel very busty! ;) Its weird though. I have to admit that I look in the mirror and still can't believe that I proceeded with this, that I still feel at times it was unnecessary and that I could have saved that money for something else, and that I felt just as good about myself before when I wore padded add-size bras and no one really knew the difference anyway... I do like them still, I am glad I did it- because I am still shocked I did- and feel sexy when I get out of the shower and catch a glimpse in the mirror... All in all, this has been an interesting, good experience and I would probably do it again. Its only been six weeks, but I think that time will tell in the next year or so how much I think it was worth it... I just hope to avoid any problems in the future- massage like crazy to reduce my scars and to avoid CC, and I pay attention to any changes daily (but there haven't been much). For anyone considering it- I would say do what makes you happy. For those who are struggling with issues, I am sending happy positive healing vibes your way. For those who are still on the fence about whether or not it was a good idea- be proud of your decisions because change is a big deal and it takes a lot to be brave enough to alter your own body.
It's been Six Months already
It's been Six months and I'm still feeling great about my decision. It's a little awkward adjusting to having larger breasts, but there are no complaints here. They're soft, my scars are nearly healed completely, and although I will say they're more sensitive than they were prior to surgery (probably due to breastfeeding for a long time and getting tough), they seem the same only bigger! My friends and family that know think they turned out great and nobody seems to know that they're implants unless they aren't telling me since I used to wear a very padded bra before! I'm happy with them so far and glad I made the decision to do it. One of the women at my work was saying how she wished she was petite and had large breasts like mine- she said hers get smaller the more weight she loses. I said "I know how that is" and she said no you don't so I told her and asked me all about it and asked for the name of my surgeon...