Just a waiting game when it comes to post op

Hey to all my ladies, I finally decided to start posting my journey on here and nowhere else. I have learned do not tell your business because it will greatly have an impact on your decision. I had a realself account, but deleted it just bc I am trying to start over and be all top secret. Yall, I have put a deposit down twice, took it back, and now I am doing it again. I have heard everything from 'be happy with your body', to 'I think youre gonna bleed to death'... yeah...ikr. I know these people think they are helping, but I finally realized it is my life, my body, and dammit, I only get one life to live!!! I am 10 days from my surgery that I was supposed to have. But I am being treated for a tick bite right now, so I either had to change dates or cancel. It is not who I wanted to go to, they were just close and convenient. So I am taking that as a sign to go with who I originally wanted to go with and that is Fisher. OMG he makes girls look like video vixens! I have my 1 year wedding anniversary coming up in May yall and I was fat and unhappy for my wedding and my honeymoon, so for my year, I wanna go all out. I need you realself ladies, I have yall and my husband. That is the only people that will know. NOBODY supports me in this surgery! NOBODY! My mom is totally freaked out about it, friends are telling me to wait till kids, and I do not want to! That's at least 5 years from now. So my husband and I came up with a plan, we are just going to tell our family we are going on a cruise. Totally got that idea from a former fisher doll on here and was like, oh my! That's brilliant! Don't get me wrong, I feel so guilty for not being honest about it to my mom and my grandma. I have always went by what they said, and how they feel. But...mom is a worry wart and so is my grandma and they are the reason I have been so up and down with this! I had everything lined up last year, and I couldn't even be excited bc my hubby was out of town and everybody wanted to talk about the risk and complications. :( I am healthy and I will be fine. More than fine! I reached out to my old coordinator at Vanity. I am not even sure if she is still there but she was super quick to respond and so nice. I am waiting to see what dates Fisher has in December that way I can blame this on a "Christmas Cruise". I am trying to lose some weight, my bmi is fine, but I want the best results I can get.

You know what I love about realself, its that even after surgery is over, yall still find the time to keep us posted, whether yall are in pain, or living the life of miss new booty. Yall still find the time to reach out and still show love. I am so excited to share my journey with all the ladies before and after me. Thank yall so much, because every single post helps! The love is so real on here! Now yall don't laugh bc I am not sharing it with anybody, so this is going to be like my booty journal. I'm going to post what I'm feeling, what I'm excited about, just like I would if I was texting a girlfriend. The good thing is... there are so many girlfriends and yall don't throw no shade. We are all here for the same thing. I love it. I know my husband is tired of hearing about it. Bless his heart, hes just like, whatever you want to do babe. So I think that's my que to [RS bleep] or get off the pot. :) Yall, I am so stoked! Like... I was saying earlier about my wedding anniversary! I mean, I didn't even feel confident to be walking around in my birthday suit on our honeymoon. Where they do that at?! I can just picture my jiggly booty all up and down cancun beach. I have so many cute bathing suits picked out! Helloooooo! Too excited!!! Can I twerk on the damn sand! I am just clowning yall, but I have had body issues all my life. I was not blessed with any kind of curves. I think under my fat is an athletic build, bc I'm square and build muscle easily, but I wouldn't know bc I lost weight way too fast as a teen through starving myself, so I totally RUINED my body. Yall my back fat is out of this world. Even when I was smaller, that back fat was so serious! My back and my stomach ended up saggy bc I went for 204 to 143 super fast and unhealthy. I was 12 damn years old weighing 204!!! I get love is blind, but my damn parents couldn't see I was way too damn big to be 12?!?!?! So after years of being a body psycho, I would stay around 165, I looked healthy, big [RS bleep], absolutely no booty. Then me and my husband started traveling for his job, meaning we would be in he middle of nowhere at times and I would just sit in the hotel room all day. Well you already know, I blew up again... and the more I tried to lose weight for our wedding the more I gained. I should of felt like a princess on that day, I have done photoshopped those pics to where I can actually stomach to look at them. Now I am here, finally realizing that I will be one of those women that will have to always watch what I eat. Which Iam totally okay with that, bc I am making it a lifestyle choice. This ya girl lot 20 pounds and I will continue to lose until surgery. I want a natural look. Not that Kardashian my booty too big for my legs look. I'm telling yall, I use to think Kim was everything until she got prego the second time. Scared the ishh out of me...I'm thinking...omg, is that what it looks like to have a big booty and be pregnant?! Totally changed my mind! I love love love Kylie Jenners body. Which my bones would never allow me to be that small and be cute with it, and my head too big too, but I Like how she looks natural but still thick. I know shes not natural, but she cute tho. Anyways...enough rambling, I just wanted to talk. Just got an email from Margaret, as soon as I get my deposit back from the other place, I am booking Fisherrrrrr. Cant wait!

My waist is 35 and my belly bulge is 35.5. This ya girl have no shape. I requested Margaret from vanity and she got back so quick. I luh her! Fisher is going on vaca in December so I need to hurry and book my date for what he has!!!!!