Super Nervous for This Long-awaited BA! - Los Angeles, CA

Hi everyone! I'm super super nervous for my surgery in a week. I can't even believe I'm typing the words "my surgery." I sort of expected to chicken out but the date is now one week away!! I'm 35 and have been wanting this for probably 15 years now. I can finally afford it and live in the land of plastic (LA :), so I figured it's time.

My doctor is amazing and I trust him. I'm only worried about hiding it from my family. They live on the East Coast (i'm in LA) and I see them every few months. I've worn padded push up bras for so long that they may not even notice, but I don't plan on mentioning it because I really don't think they will approve. Worse, a few of them will be judgmental/possibly very mean about it.

My plan is to go from a 34 A/B to a C, somewhere around 370 ccs silicone under the muscle. I'm 5'9" and about 135. Any words of encouragement are most welcome :)

Well today marks two weeks since my BA surgery. I had a very uneventful surgery and everything went well. I got 331ccs in my left and 371ccs, Allergan smooth round silicon. I got to the surgical center in a daze of nerves and barely remember the whole thing. I woke up extremely lucid and in some discomfort but nothing shocking or unbearable. I didn't get nauseous at any point (thank god!) and went home and immediately fell asleep. The painkillers (Vicodin) were great, I just slept on and off for the first several days. At day two I went out to lunch with friends, and basically every day since, I've been out and about at least a little bit. I'm obsessed with the size, it's absolutely PERFECT for me--still small enough to camouflage/hide from people I don't want all up in my business, still big enough to look super sexy when I want them to. And most importantly, exactly the size my boobs appeared to be for all those years I was wearing super-duper padded push-up bras! So no one has noticed until I tell them. Perfect. (The selfies I posted don't really do them justice because I have been wearing these soothing gel nipple pads that leave a ring around the nip where my self-tanner used to be, hehe, but you get the idea.) That's not to say, however, that it hasn't been MUCH more of a big deal than I really anticipated. I get really crabby and frustrated pretty much every night around 9pm these days because I'm impatient to feel normal. Waking up in the morning is also a very uncomfortable time. Honestly while I was on the painkillers, I really didn't have any complaints. I could not sit up or even feed myself right away, but as long as I moved slowly and carefully, it was all good. Since I went off them at day 8, it's definitely been more of a struggle... there is no blessed drugged out relief, LOL! I take Tylenol but I'm still having a lot of pain and discomfort when I do anything except sit down and not use my arms, or lie down and not use my arms. Walking is also fine, but something as simple as carrying my purse can get quite uncomfortable. I've been trying things but usually they wind up hurting me. Like the other day I drove and grocery shopped. All of it, frankly, felt like too much. My biggest source of discomfort has been the extreme sensitivity in my nipples. Taking off or putting on a bra is like agony, absolutely nothing feels good against the skin. I guess this is my nerves re-growing, but the nipples have been at full attention 24/7, which is so so so uncomfortable. I bought a bunch of things for nursing moms to soothe the nipples, and they work pretty well. Especially these Lansinoh TheraPearl 3-in-1 Hot or Cold Breast Therapy ice/heat packs. I use them for icing only but they're amazing! Boob-shaped gel packs. Genius. The other thing is that my left side (which got a smaller implant but was bigger to begin with) has been pretty much constantly in pain. The muscle on tweaks and spasms constantly, and generally seems to be pretty unhappy. I went to the doctor a week ago to get the stitches out (which almost made me faint, holy crap that was actually extremely painful), and he tried to teach me how to massage them but I honestly can still barely touch them without extreme caution and discomfort. All throughout the day and night, I'm very very very aware of the breasts. The left one especially feels like a sore grapefruit stuck to me. Even though I absolutely love the size, I did have this sinking feeling one night of "Oh my god is this my life now? I can never take these off? Have I made a huge mistake??" I think that's a pretty normal thing.... right???? :) Anyway, I'm really desperate to feel normal again and I'd love to hear some responses from anyone who felt this way around 2 weeks. I know it's so so early but wow, I'm exhausted from feeling so exhausted :)