10 weeks tomorrow - 34 DD - DDD

I am lucky enough to have found a surgeon that takes payments. I t's like 'layaway' for boobs. My husband hates to put anything on credit.... however if by January or February if I don't have my balance paid, the rest will be on credit. I have waited long enough and I am not letting money becthe reason I can't do it.

Also, I forgot to mention that I went to natrelle.com (which happens to be the brand of my implant) and ordered their consultation kit. Its supposed to help you "really"decidevon a size. I am nit sure hiw they will be or if they are even worth it. But they were only $39.99 + $5 S/H and it comes with a $50 rebate towards my implants.

I finally have my funds secured for my first deposit on the arrival of my "twins".

I love how supportive my husband is being...even though these really are for me...they are of course for him too. There is a story to why I am so surprised of his support.

(I apologize in advancce for my drawn out story, I figured it may give a bit more background on who I am and why I am making my breast augmentation decision)

Before deciding to go all the way with a breast augmentation, I learned that I have infertility issues. My husband has one daughter from a previous marriage and we have one son together. After having my son, I wanted a breast enlargement. I had wanted one since I even knew it was possible to get an enlargement. After doing my research I read a few articles that said "if you have a breast enlargement and get pregnant after, there is a possibilty for a double bubble effect on your boobs." I wanted another baby, I wanted bigger boobs, but I did not want to look like I had four boobs. So I put off the breast augmentation and decided to try for a baby while I was still young and ready. For the last 9 years or so we have been trying to have another baby. Finally, I went to the doctor about 6 months ago to get evaluated, nothing even close to pregnancy had happened by this time. After a full work up it was determined that I have at least one full blockage of a fallopian tube and possibly a partial of the other, basically making it impossible for egg and sperm to ever meet, thus making it impossible for a natural occurring pregnancy. I was devastated to say the least. I had fought so hard up until this point that I refused to go down that easy. I "thought' I was ready to go into the fertility clinic fighting. But again, after a bunch of research on reproductive technologies, I realized that there is a lot of committment with going in and out of the doctor for however long it may take and could take months or years. Also, the financial obligation involved....starts at $10,000, enough said. Then there is the thought of what if it does not work the first time, now we have disappointment for my husband, for myself, and for my kids that I do have. After a lot of anger and a lot of tears I finally have made some peace with my cards dealt to me. My husband tried to be very supportive but with the amount of obligation going towards infertility treatments with no guaranteed outcome he was very apprehensive about the whole thing and had no idea on how to deal with my feelings. He only wanted to pursue it to make me feel better, knowing that there was no baby guarantee. He wanted a baby as bad as I did but the emotions that come with infertility neither of us were prepared for.

So after my long sob story of infertility...

After coming to peace with the idea of no more babies, I thought of all the fun things I can do with no baby attached to me. Things like travel, go play bingo, go out dancing, improve myself both inside and out. Which is where breast augmentation came into my mind again. I was nervous in coming out with what I wanted to do to both my family and my friends. After receiving devestating news of no more babies I had no idea what they would think of me, would they think I was crazy? I was really nervous to tell my husband mainly because of the money and his feelings on implants, he is not sure how they feel or how they will look, also he is not sure how I will feel. But I sucked it up made my consultation appointment and told my husband what I was going to do. I told him "I still want twins." (he knew twins were a possibility with infertility treatments) I went on to say "The twins I want you will love too, they won't cry, have dirty diapers, or wake you up in the middle of the night". With his perplexed look, I came out and said "I WANT A BOOB JOB!" He was nervous about the money and he is concerned on how they will feel and on how I will fell, but for the most part he said "GO FOR IT!" After my consultation I quoted my husband the price and explained their "layaway" plan. He seems quite pleased that I have just about everything researched and figured out. I also told him that it was a fraction of the price of infertility treatments with pretty much guaranteed results. Everytime we talk about the arrival of our new "twins" his face lights up as if we were having real babies. Most think that he will like them in a provacative male sexual way....and I am pretty sure he will. But I also think he is happy with my decision because it is something I have wanted for a while and it's something that will make me happy and make me feel better (On top of being a lot easier than infertility treatments and a baby). It's also something that I think will bring us even closer together in the bedroom (not that we have any issues in that department). I have alway been self conscience of that area of my body and never really let my husband have any playtime in that part of the park. With more confidence in that area I am sure the park will be open for business.

So sorry for the long drawn out story, but now that I am in this, I feel like I need to get everything off my chest and sometimes your friends only understand so much....especially since most of them have enough [RS bleep] to donate to all the itty bitty [RS bleep] committees around the world.