2 months post-op photos. Full time Score; Roseyjam - 2. PIP's - 0

Dear Ladies,I can't thank you all enough for all your stories. I have been following many of you since Sept 2012. This site has helped reasure me at times when I've felt really anxious.

My story... I started to grow quite early but underdeveloped during my teenage and early adult life. With family directly and indirectly saying awful things about small and flat chests, I no doubt developed a huge complex. I felt inadequete, inferior, and undesirable. I wanted to wear certain clothes but I felt I couldn't because I felt so flat. I think I was an A cup. I was never measured as I was too embarrassed. I got 290cc subglandular, high profile round implants in 2007 when I was 21, making me a C cup. Although I was happy with the size, I've never been happy with having implants in me. I would love real ones, ones that wobble.

In 2009, I approached the clinic who put them in, explaining I would like them removed. They really scared me saying how awful I'd look with sagging skin etc. On and off since then, I have bouts where I feel I can't cope with them in. So, in dec 2011, I said to my husband, after I finish breastfeeding our little boy, I would like to look into getting them removed. My hubby has been great, so supportive. Then came jan 2012 and I discover I have pip implants. The stress was immense. Thankfully, I had scans and all was ok. So, I finished breastfeeding jan 2013 after 16 months.

My first appt with consultant was last Tues 12th Feb and it was awful. He grabbed and pinched the skin around the nipple and said that's all I have and I will be very flat and if I can cope/live with that then fine. I didn't understand as I'm bigger than before pregnancy and according to nurse when I was getting implants in 2007, she said I had enough tissue there for them. He tried to get me to agree to more implants too. I said I would just like removal. He said well if you can deal with a smooth silhouette! It was all too quick my time with him. He said right then, a capsulectomy needed, drains in over night, here's the price, here's the date we can do, and here's the door! That's how I felt it went. I was only in ther 10-15mins! I thought, but I've had scans, I may not need a capsulectomy. It was all too quick. It felt so inhumane. I've managed to dust myself off. Its so hard at times having this hanging over me.

I've managed to book another consultant for 7 March. His profile looks good. He does reconstruction amongst many other things. Does work for the nhs and specialises in wounds and scar tissue. The hospital have been very nice so that's a good start and they had a price on record for a removal only (£2900) so it sounds like they do do removals. I will let you all know how I get on and hope all you ladies are all doing well.

I will post a photo soon. X

Hi Ladies, I had an appointment today with a different PS. I can't explain how relieved and pleased I am! He's really lovely. He was pleasant, curteous, and I enjoyed his company. Above all I feel really comfortable with him.

Basically, the good news is that my implants feel intact. And because I don't have any pain or discomfort and he can't feel any Lymph Nodes, I won't need a Capsulectomy. The other good news is that I can do it under General and go home the same day. Thankgod! It was a huge upset to me thinking I may have to stay in because its only my husband and I here looking after baby. We don't have family close by. Also, my son has never been away from me for a long time and I'd be devastated if he was in a lot of distress, which he would be, bless him.

The not so good news is Subglandular pockets! He said he doesn't recommend this and especially for me as I'm dainty. He said that after explant the breasts could become scalloped to the chest wall. He did say that the breasts could tighten up in time. Here's hoping Ladies! I really hope so! I hope I don't cave in. I hope the fluff fairy is kind to me! The other points are loss of volume due to breastfeeding and the rippling on the insides, which is due to thinning of breast tissue due to Subglandular pockets! Damn it! Has anyone had subglandular ones and all's been ok? I'm still confused though because I'm still bigger than before pregnancy. I'll just have to wait and see.

A wee bit of info on these bloody PIP implants Ladies...he called them "bad implants and around the time I got them in in 2007, there was a lot of these bad implants going around". Yikes! Scary stuff! He said implants have a shell, like a layer. PIP's have 1 layer and better quality implants have 2 or 3 layers. These layers prevent silicone diffusion, which is a leakage going into the Capsule Membrane. The better implants, he says (and I thought 'better'...sod them all)! They are 300 times better than PIP's (that's the ratio of silicone diffusion). So if leakage happens, silicone goes into the capsule, then into its lining, and into the Lymph Nodes. I felt sick as a chip at this point! Whilst I've been eating organic food, using chemically free face and body wash, deodrant, and household cleaners over the past 3 years...as well as buying a water filter and seeing a wonderful herbalist, I'm walking around with 2 miniature mines stuck to my chest! Utter madness!

What was really reasurring was he ended the consultation by saying "I think you're going to be pleased to have them out". I'm just so happy he's been so supportive. Its a huge weight of my mind. To all the lovely ladies here...there are good ones out there. My first one was awful but I took the advice off many ladies here and I did my research. Thanks a million for that advice!

So my plan next is to phone his wife tomorrow, who's his secretary and a plastic/cosmetic nurse, and see what dates I can have. I was going for July as its 6 months after breastfeeding but he said I'd be ok and it was also easier with hubbys work. But I'm going to see what they have and if its earlier than july...great...so be it. I'm ready to join you on the other side! I really hope some of the things I asked about today and what I've written here will help others. I Will keep you all posted. X