33 Year Old, 15 Year Implant Removal. My Story - Gloucester, GB

First of all, I want to thank all the ladies who...

First of all, I want to thank all the ladies who posted their stories and pictures. It really helped me. Plus to all the women who commented and offered support.

I had my implants put in when I was a very insecure 18 year old. It actually makes me mad that surgeons can operate on girls as young as this. My surgeon did a bad job. Placed the implant all under my nipple, made the scar and initial cut way to low, put too large implants in for my frame (I'm 8st and still wear kids clothes - I am very petite). Plus they were over the muscle. When I complained that my nipples were really high and all the implant was low, he told me it was because I had high nipples and should be happy. Great! As I was so young, I trusted him and took his word for it. I didn't know they weren't right until lots of comments afterwards.

Sadly, I put way too much emphasis on large breasts being the most important and desirable aspect of a woman. This relates to other sadder things, which was another reason I wanted them out.

I've also had a daughter and being pregnant and watching my body change, she was 9lb 2) and I was huge! But I loved it and afterwards I gave myself time, a lot of it, to see my stomach return to its more normal size. Again, it's different but that's okay. I love my mummy tummy and that started to instil in me, that I didn't need to look perfect or like a porn star to be attractive and that I needed to respect my body because it's amazing.

I chose to have my surgery with Dr McDirmid in Cheltenham. He is amazing. He was so kind to me, extremely helpful in all my questions, following up personally by email. He truly is an expert in his field, and I was impressed at his knowledge and awareness of my body, and what would look good for me. He also realised this was a psychological process I was going through, and I felt fully supported. I originally saw him before I was pregnant and planned to have them removed, but got pregnant the same month I was due to go in!

He came and saw me on the day of the op to review what we'd spoken about at our previous consultations. We've spoken that I would like more children and he advised it was best to do that and then see what I wanted. He also said if I couldn't live with it, and it was too difficult,and I was depressed with the result, he'd fit me in quickly to do another surgery. Which I was really grateful for. The meet up gave me another boost of confidence ahead of the op and put me in a good frame of mind.

Having said that I found it difficult leading up to the op, and had a few panic lead meltdowns but that was just because I was scared. This is all I'd known really. I didn't like the result and was unlucky but I also feared what they'd look like, would I be attractive, would my other half still fancy me. All normal and I had to accept that fear. On the day though I was really good, a lot of my fear was that I'd get ill and wouldn't be able to have it and I couldn't face going through all the emotions again. I kept repeating positive mantras to myself and they have really helped me.


I cried when I came round at the relief of it being over. I spoke to the nurse in the recovery room about how this was important for me and I have a little girl and I want to show her that it's not your breast size that counts. The nurse was really kind and supportive.

I was transferred to my own room and when another nurse checked, I asked her if they were okay. I knew I shouldn't have asked her as she was very abrupt and harsh before ( not the soft approach I needed) and she said they looked flatter and empty. Er, thanks! She left, I gave myself a pep talk and then peaked under my gown.

They do look very different but I am actually really happy. There is extra skin but I am hoping that in time I may fluff up. As I've read that can happen. I don't want to point out the negatives as trying to stay positive and I'm writing this on day two. My partner has seen them to and thinks they look better, they are natural and they are me and he doesn't care about boobs. He cares about me. I'm starting to let this sink in. I am good enough, it's not about my breasts.

The recovery has been good. I've not slept really so exhausted now. I had no drains and he kept the cartilage in and amazingly they had kept in tact. I was done in 30 minutes! He came to see me in the recovery room about 20'mins after I woke up which was great. I then came down to my own private room.

I told the aneathatist that I suffered a lot from sickness after going under and he gave me anti sickness drugs to help. Which they did. I only had one episode of sweating and vomiting, when I had a tramadol with no anti sickness tablet. So I'd recommend taking the anti sickness drugs with the tramadol.

We drove home this afternoon and now at home. I was a annoyed that I let the nurses comment get to me as I had put months into this to prepare myself and I felt her comments were really mean and not welcome. I am trying to blot her out of my head and instead focus on being as positive as I have been. However I don't think she should be a nurse for someone going through an explant. A simple they look fine would have surficed! Aside from her saying that the experience was really good but that has marred it for me and made me feel quite down.

I feel like they are smaller today but they seem more settled. I've asked my other half a thousand times if I am still attractive! I like them but there is no denying they are small but at least I don't look like I have something stuck on my chest. My scars sit really low on my chest because of the original incorrect incision. He has redone them and I'm going to get some heal gel to help the look of them. My body has various scars from medical ops so it's just another part of me I have to accept.

I definitely need sleep. I haven't sleep properly for five days now, mix of anxiety and I am also a front sleeper, so struggling to sleep on my back propped up by pillows. I've sprayed this works lavender spray on my pillow as that's lovely. Sorry about the long and perhaps incoherent post! It's been an emotional ride and I am on lots of pain meds!

I will post pictures, a bit nervous but I think it's good to have taken myself back and to look like a normal mum who breastfed her baby and had implants in for 15 years. I can do this!

Day three!

So today has been better. I have slept, so that's good! Lavender spray helped a lot, as did a lot of pillows and having my meds and water right beside me, so I could take them whenever. I am not wearing any compressions or bra. My surgeon said maybe after 48 hours. I feel like it's mixed feedback on forums as to whether to wear any support.

I've taken my new photo and I am happy with them. When I compare it to my before picture, I think I look a lot better now. I am more in proportion and now I can show off my chest which is very petite. In my opinion seeing my breasts unnaturally come out of my small frame looked bizarre, now that I can see how I am meant to look naturally.

Trying to be kind to myself everyday. I even apologised to myself today for what I put myself through and that from now on, I am going to appreciate myself.

I can honestly say, it is the right decision for me and I'm glad I finally faced up to it.
Dr McDirmid

5 out of 5 stars Overall rating
5 out of 5 stars Doctor's bedside manner
5 out of 5 stars Answered my questions
5 out of 5 stars After care follow-up
5 out of 5 stars Time spent with me
5 out of 5 stars Phone or email responsiveness
3 out of 5 stars Staff professionalism & courtesy
5 out of 5 stars Payment process
4 out of 5 stars Wait times
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