Giving Myself a TT for my 60th Birthday! Fort Myers, FL

OK....getting up the nerve to post pics! First had...

OK....getting up the nerve to post pics! First had to buy a camera and clean up my bedroom! lol....never know what is going to show up BEHIND you!
Being depressed because i don't have more of a support system. NONE in fact. Leaving my hometown in Illinois, to have the surgery in Florida. Recoup in warmth!

149lbs. 130 when i got married at 32. Two big 9 lb babies later....both c-sections...i now look like this! Been divorced for 7 years after being in a loveless marriage for 20 years! 170 at my heaviest...got down to 133 at my lightest after i found out my fiance was cheating on me. That is my profile pic! And the first one on here. Believe me...i looked NOTHING like that when i got married...and was almost the same weight! lol
So now i am in the dating world again, and really think my body holds me back from enjoying myself! I mean, who wants to get undressed....looking like THIS!
Planning on doing this around Dec. 3, 2014
Birthday is Christmas Eve. Be ready for kayaking again by next summer.

Also, I'm a massage therapist...so don't know WHEN I'll be able to get back to work! Lots of core muscles usage! Girls...wish me luck!
Also.....again...teehee...has anyone used Dr. Brueck ? He is out of Fort Myers and is suppose to be top rated. He is the only one i have contacted.
TT/ Lipo....for $10,000. He didn't mention MR...so i have emailed them and asked if that was included...hope.

Bought my plane tickets!

So no turning back! Talked to a gf about seeing if she can go the first week! Told her i would pay her way! She has a nursing background, so she won't gag at the sight of the drains...or draining them for me! ugh
I also heard back from the PS who had said previously that he would look into the Experal shots. I copied and pasted a paragraph from someone on RS about the godsend the shot was....and sent it to him. He said he could do it if i wanted. He said it would be about $300. I told him i would love to be his guinea pig! lol

I still don't know if my mom will be giving me part of my inheritance yet.....since I'm squandering it on a TT...but i just won't bring the subject up. I spent one hour shopping today and trying on clothes. While in the changing room, i thought 2 things: Lay off the cookies. And boy my 'girls' need lifting. Not so bad in a bra, because that is what bras do...but the minute i tried on a swimming suit! ugh. Halters/bandeau.....yikes. I've never had complaints from men on my boobies....actually compliments. But if i lose any weight, they'll be even flatter against my stomach. I've seen my boobs this way for so long...i think it's NORMAL to look this way. Then when i see women complaining about their breasts...i think...HEY, THEY LOOK JUST LIKE MINE!!! What's the problem?? lol
Wondering if i should just get the whole thing done at once. Decisions....and children are starving in.....
sigh

Dieting!! 3 days and lost 3.5 pounds

Did the hcg diet a year and a half ago. Lost 17 pounds in 40 days...but gradually gained almost all of it back. But then again...i ate like there was no tomorrow!!! lol Last time i did the hcg shots...Dr. and B-12 shots at $40 a pop. Cost me over a thousand bucks...but forced me not to cheat. This time I'm doing the homeopathic drops under the tongue. Suppose to keep me from being hungry...and so far so good. I usually ate out of boredom anyway....and cuz...darn it...food tastes so darn GOOD! ;-) Haven't cheated yet...but hey...been only 3 days. Very strict diet....approx 500 cal. a day...I'm sure i do a little more.

I had been seeing a guy/friend/lover for over a year...and he had turned on me. Got nicer when he new i was going to have a TT in Florida, and he was worried about me. Thought i should have it done in my hometown, and he'd help take care of me. A friend laughed and said, "do you have that in writing?" He's been so hot and FREEZING COLD for the last 6 months. Anyway, a few weeks ago, when he said i want a relationship...but not with you...and more horrible things...i left for good. I had just started seeing a 'new' guy...but kept ignoring him for 'old' guy. So now i am focusing on 'new' guy who ADORES me! lol He says he likes me just as i am, but if i want to do the TT he will support me. He eats the same as me on my diet...just more. He's thin. His biggest concern is that i will be away from him for over a month....and will miss my birthday and Christmas with him!!! lol Lets just say....it's new and he's twitter-patted...and I'm not! He also doesn't know i am going to be 60!!!!!!!! hahahaha...he's 50 and says he doesn't care how old i am! (yeah...but he doesn't now HOW OLD...hahaha) He's not as active as i am....but going to break him into kayaking and hiking. He's more into watching tv. Typical man...lol Anyway, I still won't let him touch my stomach when we are cuddling...which is ALL the time! MAN...he's a 'toucher'!!!

I can't wait to have this blob cut off! I'm still not sure if mom will give me part of the inheritance to do this....but maybe she will when she gets use to the idea. I have enough saved...it was just to go for a newer vehicle! But TT is MORE important. I think I'll keep my boobies...and just buy more bras!!!! teehee Someone on here told me they looked good!!!! So i will believe them (not) and keep them around for a while longer! Hoping if i lose my stomach, they won't have anything to LAY on!

Thanks RS girls for being here and all helping each other! You all are my new obsession! I love following us 'older' gals....you are all such an inspiration! (And you all know who you are!!!! ;-) ) Love you all....
Soon to be the new and improved Realitynut!!!!!

Sad night for me......

Just found out a friend of mine has a brain tumor. She is my age, and they were only able to cut out 50% of the tumor. They said she won't be able to massage or live on her own. Sounds horrible. She is so sweet and 3 years ago her husband shot himself with a shotgun in front of her. She then did the hcg diet and lost 75 pounds then got a breast lift. She's been renting a space from me while she was redoing her apartment. ( we are both massage therapists) She always did the couples massage with me. She had even offered to go to Florida with me while i got my TT...but then decided she couldn't go financially. I'm so afraid she's not going to be the same, sweet loving person she was....or if she will even live. I had a friend die at 51 of brain cancer. It sure puts everything into perspective. I am so lucky be healthy.....just not sexy! She and i both talked about getting TT's....sorry I'm rambling....but I don't have that many friends...and she was one of them. *cry*

update on my gf...

I was out of town the other day, and her daughter called to tell me that it was the worst kind of brain cancer....fast spreader. And she is at stage 4. Only half the tumor was removed...and her left side isn't working. Doesn't sound good.
I have lost 5 pounds since starting my diet...but i have my cheat days...like tonight when i went shopping for diet food late at night....starving. Bought some REALLY GOOD coconut pecan cookies. Ate them in the store while shopping. I did go for a long walk tonite..so maybe that will counteract it!
Thanks all you ladies on here, for your kind words and support...it means so much!

Surgery date...Dec. 8.

Flying down Dec. 4, and then will have my first pre-op that same day! whew.
It's getting real! Going to make a list of my supplies today and go shopping...soon. Gotta find the list (s) on some of your girls journeys! I got Arnica gel written down! lol
One of my customers told me yesterday, that the lady that is going to do her hair while i am gone, told her that her daughter had a TT about 10 years ago, and almost died. I think she got septic infection or something. I said , 'eh....that was 10 years ago". I know there are risks, but there are risks in everything a person does...or attempts to do. I don't live my life being afraid of 'what might happen'....I'm more afraid of looking back on my life and NOT seeing the risks i took. The "WHAT DID I DO IN MY LIFE"......??? NOTHING! I know it's a tough surgery, and I'm a wimp when it comes to pain....but I've looked like this for 26 years (after kids) and not much better before the kiddos! lol

Everyone one here looks SO WONDERFUL, and are so positive about their experience...it gives me hope. You guys give me support, and lots of ((hugs)) when i need it! Thanks so much....and ya know.....teehee...i hate to say it, but today i am sorta liking the new format. I think maybe they've fixed the problems....that, or I wasn't 'hooked' on the last one! But i do have the 'newsfeed' yet by my profile pic....and i get message updates. But i am not on my phone. I'm on a pc....with a 23 in. tv screen for my computer screen! LOL...what can i say...i live on here!
OK...off to finding/making my LIST of things to have! YAY!

I thought i updated...but can't find it!!! Less than ONE MONTH!

IMath wanted an update...lol. Well...just dumped a guy tonite that was crazy over me. Dated him a whole 2 months!!! YIKES. He had just got divorced in July....and met me the end of Aug. Oh well....went back with a guy that i had been seeing...but after he hadn't seen me for a month...he decided he was in LOVE! So we will see. He's the short, heavy, bald guy...who could care less on how i looked...but is supportive. Mom said, "well if you're getting back with Tom....why are you still getting a TT? " I said, "MOM!!! I'm not doing it for Tom...or any other guy! I'm doing it for myself so i can look good in my clothes AND naked! " I didn't tell her so i could also feel SEXY! lol I pulled up my shirt, and said....LOOK...my stomach is bigger than my butt!!!

She's been heavy for years, and i guess didn't care.

Tom just got to see his first grandbaby born last night. So that is exciting...new life!
My friend is still in the hospital coping well with her cancer. She started chemo and radiation this past week. I go there a couple of times a week to massage her. I don't think i could be in that great of spirits!
I'm making my list (and checking it twice!) To start buying stuff off of Amazon...like Arnica pellets and gel!
My appt. to see a doc for blood work is Nov. 12. After that...I'm off to see the wizard!!!
YAY!

Question? Just starting to buy my stuff....and confused already! lol

Bought Arnica Montana pellets. Now i was going to buy the gel...but there is a cream, an oil and a gel....is the gel the best? I'm on Amazon. Creams usually soak in and not so messy...but what do you all think?
Now off to look for my female urinal! Yipee!

Yes...I am giddy....about everything!!!

Making a list of things to have....and do...

I did by the Arnica Montana pellets and gel. And pee urinal. Neosporin. Bought silicone scar away strips on amazon....but sounds like most used the brown strips. So i looked that up on Amazon and became confused on which to buy. Heard brown strips at first....silicone later? (got that off of some website....) Any other suggestions? I do have a list....somewhere....lol Going to buy a walker and a stool riser at a goodwill store when i get to Florida! Lots of old people....should be lots of walkers. Then take them back when i'm done!

EEKS! Getting real! Got a suitcase last night. LOL

Talked to my sis who's condo I'm 'borrowing' for the month, and told her I'd like to 'rent' an electric recliner. She said there are 'walkers' at the condo community to borrow!
Woo-hoo!
Now to figure out who is going to take care of my chihuahua....my best bud....and water my plants.

Still have had 2 people this week (long time customers) who chastised me for doing this. Both are breast cancer survivors....and that may be why! But my friend who is suffering through the brain cancer is very supportive. Possibly because she had lost 75 pounds on the hcg diet and had her breasts lifted. She really needed a TT too....but now just trying to LIVE! Puts everything into perspective.

My Mom asked me if having a TT will make me less crazy (ie. less insecure). I said "no.....that has to do with by "head"...not my body. But at least I'll look GOOD while I'm acting crazy!

Don't you just love all the unsupportive people in your lives??? Thank God for Real Self! HUGS and THANKS to all of you!!!

Count down......6 days from now I'll be flat!

or as flat as i can possibly be! I can't BELIEVE how great you ladies on here look! The hardest part is leaving my chihuahua Pup here alone for almost 5 weeks. I think we've only been apart for one night in her 7 years. ugh.
I'm weighing my suitcase tonite...hope it's not overpacked...and going to take a pic of me in my new two piece! lol....Then i will take a pic weekly to see my WONDERFUL transformation! (hopefully)
I never got that 'nesting' bug like some of you. Just want to ESCAPE the mess...lol! I do have a new 40 in., tv...and i was to have DirectTV installed today. They came and said my house was too tall and dangerous. (old victorian) and too many trees. HUH? Hardly any trees. And i showed them where there were 2 dishes already on the third story (or was that a fourth peak....lol) He didn't want to do it! So i was bummed. Planning on recording lots of shows so i can watch and recover....lol
So anyway, the bf is acting as cold as an ice cube...so that is bumming me out. The weather here is in the 20's...but Florida is in the 70's so excited about that. Flying a gf down with me...and kayaking 2 days before the sx....then laying on the beach (in all my fat glory) the day before! Oh Well....i should have lots of 'before pics'....lol

Hey......at least I'll look good for my 60th birthday. I will be alone during my birthday and Christmas. My girlfriend is flying back on the 18....10 days after the sx. Heard that 10 days is the best time to fall into a depression....and i have a small problem with that anyway! (No bf, no pup, no fam....alone during the holidays....ya know....) But I will keep in touch with all of you! Please all you old timers....keep on POSTING! Dreamer.....were are you???
I know Imath will keep me company!!! ;-)

Pics....even worse than before!

Of course i didn't LOSE weight....and having 3 thanksgiving dinners didn't help! I guess that makes up for no Christmas or Birthday dinners! Anyway...my pics won't load. So i had to start over. will post this...and then try pics again. They were taken after i ate oatmeal and raisin cookies (home made) and drank milk.....at 1 in the morning!!!!! lol ugh. Hear the deprecating laugh....

Pics....week before sx

gonna wear this 'two piece' suit every week for God knows how long......*shakes head in disgust*

try pics again

In 2 days I'll be on the flat side

Sorry I haven't been on....use to my PC with a 40 inch TV screen.. .lol now I'm on my new ph and getting use to it. I'm use to seeing you girls on the BIG screen :-)

Got here thurs. And met my ps. He said he felt like he knew me cuz of all the emails I sent him. He said the experal shot cost $3000 . Oh well...He needs to learn and update.....lol. I didn't ask many questions and he didn't say much. He just grabbed my big glob of fat and said I'd have good results:-) none of them had heard of REALSELF!!!!!! WHAT!!!!!

Bought my walker Friday and went kayaking a couple of hours today! Somehow they don't seem to go together!
Tomorrow possibly go to the beach...not sure with this body tho...had 3 wonderful seafood meals. As you all know, I live in Illinois and it's been in the 20's and 30's. The day I got her In florida it was 86. Today upper 70's. Funny to see all the Christmas lights and it's hot out .
Not looking forward to the pain...but I'm strangely not nervous. I look at all the GREAT results on here...and hope I can look half as good. If it wasn't for all of you I would know nothing about cg's...much less arnica, bromelain, pineapple juice, walkers and female urinals. Thanks so much girls...and imath. The friend I brought along couldn't believe how prepared I was! One more day!!!

help!

Walgreens said they didn't have the 400 dosage of cellebex. (Sp?) But could get it tomorrow. ..day of surgery. There was no directions with it. Was I suppose to start taking that the day BEFORE sx...or the day of?

I've been really nauseous

Could it be from the percoset. The only time I feel good is when I'm sleeping. I dry heaved a few times when I got home. Later in the eve. And this morning when I got up to pee...had a hot flash...and dry heaved multiple times in sink. Then I always feel better. Also have headache. I take zone an for nausea. Ugh. Glad I had experal . Cuz the pain from the lipo was a killer. I tell people I'm fine as long as I don't move. ..keep my eyes shut.. .and don't talk. So what do I do for thus nausea?

Having dry heaves

Had dry heaves at least 5 different times not sure if it's the percoset or not. Ugh.

took pic. did review. then lost it all

Don't feel like doing it all over again. Lost it cuz 8 didn't have a title. Ugh

felt good all day.

The nausea is gone. I make sure I only take the percoset when I eat. My gf took me outside for a wheelchair ride around the condo compound. My headache is now gone too!! My biggest complaint tonight is I ate too much and my binder is uncomfortable. I hadn't brushed my teeth or combed my hair since monday. You'll all be glad to know I accomplished that today!...i did see dr. Yest. Said I looked good. I was too sick to pay attention. He'll see me again monday. So I guess I'm gonna live. We'll see how im gonna make it through swell hell! Now that I'm feeling better I can get back on RS. Remember I was use to a 23 in screen....then 40. Now I'm on my ph. Not good while having headaches! Lol talk to you all later about my sx concerns. ...my scar is low and straight. Couldn't make out my bb. Just a bloody mess behind gauze. One drain in my hip...so that is good. In fact...my drain doesn't bother me at all. As long as I don't move...i feel great!! Thanks to all of you guys I knew what to expect. My ps told me NOTHING!!

out shopping!!

Well sorta. .I'm in the parking lot sitting in the car while my gf is shopping. The pain on my sides are HORRIBLE if I stand and once in a while terrible burning In the incision area. I'm best in sitting/ reclining positiin. So I do a LOT if sitting and watching hgtv. Had a little nausea last night but no dry heaves! Yay. I keep hoping the pain on my sides are going to get better...but so far terrible if not hanging on my walker. Thanks for everyone's support!

Keep waiting for it to get better...

And it ain't happening. I can't walk without a walker...and even then my flank pain about brings me to my knees. I feel so swollen tonite...makes me think I shouldn't eat. Usually if I'm sitting..I'm ok. But I've been miserable tonite. I try to wait my 8 hrs between percoset...and I keep complaining. I hope everyday I'm going to see improvement ..and so far NADA. EXCEPT the headaches and dry heaves have quit...so I guess that is progress. Trying to pass gas...but haven't even come close to a bm. Tmi. My gf said "how many of the (rs) girls had to be wheeled around in wheelchairs!?" NONE. I think my doc was mad at me and took out his frustrations with my lipo. Ugh. The on again, off again by hasn't been the nicest. When asked if he missed me he said. ..how can I miss you...i talk to you every day. So I cried myself to sleep last night...and wouldn't talk to him today. My biggest wish? I wake up in the morning and I've turned a BIG corner. My hair looks like a matted horse tail.....ugh

gonna try photo

Belly button is ugly too.

You guys are soon sweet

A big hug to imath , fullcirclemer, and fitbug for being so cincerned. I took a long nap this afternoon, took a percoset, then decided on doing my first shower with gf help...and washing my matted horse tail. Felt great until she sounded like her voice was coming from a tunnel. We got out. I sat on my chair/bed and proceeded to dry heave. Gf went to get a towel...i think. The next think I remember is sharp shooting pain..and I didn't know why. Here I had fainted and she had me laying flat with my legs bent at my knees...and shoved up to my chest! Owe! If that didn't make me wake up...nothing would. I had been happily dreaming...lol. She said she held me and I was out cold. She said she slapped my face and called my name...nothing. Good thing she has a nursing background.

I have one percoset left which I will use when I see my ps tomorrow afternoon. I hope I get more...i drink moral ax in pineapple juice...but nothing. I don't even care...i am passing gas. :-)
I have 2 small stitches in the middle of my lower back...apparently where he put the lipo cannula (sp?) In. I also have about a 1 1/2 in. Open wound in my back/ side. We can't figure out how it got there. I have lots of pics...just can't attache them. Later. Yes my gf is leaving thurs. Early. I thought for sure I'd be further along than this . She still has to help me up in the morning...lol. hey I still have 3 days to get better! The drain is draining much slower...but it's still pretty dang red . I know doc wants to take it out. .but honestly it doesn't bother me one bit . I'm fine sitting and can get up and sit down. ..strong legs I guess. But the walking..omg...my flanks and back feel like the are cramping up..and as we all know. ..it's our back muscles that hold you up. Ugh. I'll only be alone from the 18 to the 29. Then family will be there. But I KNOW they don't want to baby me!!
So that's my report. Maybe pics someday. Oh yeah. We washed my binder cuz it was so gross and bloody. NOT from the incision. . But that weird wound. Also the second day or so I had some bumps but my hip drain. I rubbed them and the skin came off...Some kind of weird blisters no biggy. But don't know what caused them. And yeah...One more gripe. ..I'm jealous of all the cute bbs. But at least I have one and it hasn't died....yet! Going to bed. First time I put myself to bed by myself:-) I told my gf if she hears a loud crash...come running!

hello...hopefully can attach pic!

Took a ton of pics this morning...then realized I can't attach them. I have to take the pics while I'm on the site. Getting use to using a ph for all of this is a pain!!! Lol Anyway...i got up this morning by myself. Wasn't bad at all. All my pain comes from standing. TT has never been an issue for pain...and the one drain in my hip I hardly knew was there. Didn't feel good to have removed tho....but I was prepared. ..i took a percoset before. First day I didn't use a walker. Was more of a pain LIFTING. that sucker! These pics aren't pretty. I'm jealous of all the trim sey bellies on here...but I said I'd be realistic and just be happy with the hanging blob gone! Which it is. Seems funny to be able to see my lady bits. There will be room between my stomach and the steering wheel now for my pup to lay. Sometimes she was pretty squished!
Gonna go for a ride in the car...Gf wants to go look for property her in Florida.
Just got done rubbing arnica gel all over my belly. Gf did back . Nurse took off bloody sterile strips yesterday and put new ones one. Can't believe I got a BB with those dreaded stitches around...and no 'innie' that's for sure. At this point I don't care. I just want to be pain free a little more when I walk. I'm in excruciating pain after 15 ft. BOOO. OK. Time for pics. Like I said...not pretty.

Oh...and imath...thanks for worrying about me. I think I can take care of myself. Now that I got up! But if any rs sister is close and would like to drive me to the doc ...Instead of me ordering a cab...feel free to hit me up!! :-) hugs to everyone...

The good part

My thighs teepee. And the bad. WELL just about everything. ..lol...but closeup of BB. I was slightly laying down in all its pics!

I'm so excited!

I think the sx was 11 days ago...and only 4 short days ago I couldn't walk longer than a few feet and not be in excruciating pain in my flanks. 2 days ago I turned a corner.. Haven't even taken half a percoset. ..which I had been doing. Just Tylenol. My gf left this morning and it's kind of nice to be alone!!! Lol. I'll let you know in a few more days. My biggest concern was swell he'll and popping stitches. But since I was so swollen from day one. Anything from now on is gonna be a piece of cake!!! Yeah. I just walked down to the pool. By FAR my biggest excursion and didn't bother me one bit! In fact it loosened up my back.
I had to finally resort to a laxitive. My gf was concerned cuz I hadn't gone for 9 days. But it is now coming out like poured cement!! Lol
For those that wondered why I didn't have this sx done in cold Illinois....here ie the reason why!

pics didn't come thru. try again!

Pool side views and 70 degrees!

ok...pic time.

Getting ready to go to pool. Never took off binder at all yesterday. Gf gone so afraid I wouldn't get it back on. Crap...i think I bought 10 cg's and brought them here. I should be able to get ONE on! Here we go. Not as Sexy as 'Sexys' or chiklets. But it's me!

oops

Pressed update instead of more...waagh

At pool. no binder.

Tried on all those clothes and pics wore me out. Took 2 Tylenol and walked SLOWLY to pool. I held my stomach the whole way... and was amazed at how it felt. I realized I'd never felt skinny in my whole life...even tho I looked pretty damn hot in my 20's ..i was always put down by (some) guys cuz of my tummy. One time a bf told me I looked like a beach ball with arms and legs!! I was 118 pounds! Wth?
Ok. At pool and sweltering :-)

Just got back from pool

4:00 pm. Took off binder for first time today. Whew. Feels good. Swelling has gone down a bit. I don't know if it's stitches or tape that I feel pulling. My ugly BB looks off center...but I don't care. Will take a quick pic and sit down. Now my shoulders are hurting...lol...whine whine

Sorry about all pics...bored but getting happy

Bought this top 2 was ago here in Florida. Wasn't thrilled...but now I am! Even with my boobs to my waist. Squeezed into corset I wore to a wedding a few months ago. After a few hours I had to go to the car and take it off!!! Lol

Tomorrow. ..2 wks. since sx

And I feel great! Sitting here watching tv...just stiff when I get up. My PAIN has gone from excruciating (hated that) to just stiff and sides ache. Totally doable. Slept in the nice big comfy bed for the 3rd night. I wish I would have done it sooner. Sleeping in a chair/lounger for 9 days wasn't the most comfy. I'm staying at my sis' s condo. She had a big recliner...but was hard to get out of feeling 100%...not after sx. The first night I was in the recliner. My gf went to bed. I was reclining...and I started dry heaving. Twice a little vomit came up...i tried calling for her. She couldn't hear me. I couldn't get up. I thought "great...I'm gonna choke and die on my vomit". Fortunately I was able to get up and reach my phone. We went to the chair/lounge for the next 9 days. That first night I got up twice during the night by myself to pee. Probably could do it cuz of pain pills...percoset every 4 hrs. But was NOT taking with food. Missed that memo. ..even tho I saw I signed off on that...pre op.
The next morning I was struggling to get up. I was hanging half on and half off the chair...my back almost flat on the chair...and my legs dangling. Gf came to help. Even tho I had a pee funnel...i still had to squat a little....or I dribbled all over. So what worked for me was to straddle the toilet and hang onto the tank. I had something to hang on to ...and rest my head when I was feeling nauseous. I emptied my drains as I sat there.
Today I'm going to do my first shower in a WEEK! Last Sunday I sat in the shower while my gf washed my hair. The warm water felt so good on my back. Then I got out....Dry heaved twice....and fainted.

But a week later and I feel like a new woman. Just wait til I take my shower and wash my hair!!! I might even take my longest walk yet...out on the pier! Yay. Wish I could stay in florida all winter!!

All you lovely rs sisters (and imath) i thankyou for your support. Every recovery is different. I was hoping every day was going to get better.. .and it didnt. It was HORRIBLE for 5 days until I saw improvement. 10 days before I was smiling. I have to admit....being sick and killer headache.. didn't help. The actual TT didn't bother me at all. Don't know if it was because of the experal shot or not...but NO pain in my abdomen. And just a little burning at times in my insision. I only had 1 drain. In my hip. I couldn't even feel it. Didn't leak much after first day....which only caused binder to get icky. So drain...Easy peasy...It was my damn lipoed sides that killed me. .and my back spasms. Funny...i never thought my sides were that bad to begin with!
So there you go. One week hell. By second week...smiling....and walking. (Wheel chair at beginning) i woke up this morning...and even with binder on...Felt so FLAT!!! And isn't that why we go through all this pain and money.. .? For me it was to rid myself of something I hated since I was a teen. My belly. And after 2 big kids and c-sections..i was always self conscious being naked. I feel like a new woman. My new dating life will start this summer!

2 wks. tummy more sensitve

Went yo ps. Took stitches out. Not him. Assistant. She said with TT there aren't many stitches. Only one little bugger didn't want to come out. We all forgot about the stitches in my back from lipo!

Just climbed outta bed....

And feeling so flat...i just had to try on the dress I bought 3 days before sx. Gonna wear it on New Years eve. My mom's birthday!

Merry Christmas everyone!

As promised I am taking a pic of me in the same swimsuit I bought just days before I left for Florida. I was going to take weekly pics in this suit...but...naw. it's been 2 1/2 weeks. I still feel wide...i am swollen (of course) my BB is still ugly. Feel kinda like a Frankenstein belly...but I am so much better than I was.
Last night I went out to eat for my birthday and my knit stretchy pencil skirt kept slipping down. My bf (yeah he flew down to see me for my B.D ) i rolled up the waist to make it tighter. After dinner..i walked slowly to the car. As I was going to get in..my skirt fell to the ground. It was slippery on the nylon spandex cg...and with my numb stomach...i couldn't feel it! Was a good laugh! Gonna be buying some nice fitted pencil type dresses!

oh...wanted to ask about Mepitac...

I put on the tape the same day that ps took out stitches. There were still a few scabs...but since bf was coming...and I wanted to start smoothing out the scar...i put the nice brown tape on. I LOVE IT!!! It matches the skin and is so easy to put on. It has been on for 4 days. I don't want to take it off! Do you think I did it too soon? Should I have waited til the few thin scabs were off? I pulled off all but 3 steri strips.

ok...now going to pool.

This looks better...lol

3 weeks ago today. ..

And I still can barely roll outta bed. But swelling is going down a tad on the sides. When I lay on my side...A feat in determination itself...i can feel my poor sore ribs. Will take a few pics and update more later!

yes...i know...I'm HOT!!

Lol am I perfect? Heck no. But I always said I wasn't looking for perfection. But I look pretty perfect in clothes...
Naked? I don't even mind the scar.i think of it as my war wounds. The dog ear is even kind of cute...
I did have my first dream of my TT. I thought the deep pleating on my right hip had evened out. Woke up this morn...it's still there. 2 pleats. Deep. Hard. Swollen. I don't even mind that. I just hoped and prayed that I wouldn't develop a soroma...or necrosis. And so far so good.
I hadn't been taking my tylenol because I only had a few left...and no car. My family is coming down today so they can get me another bottle. So I took a few pills during the night.

I really feel good when I'm watching tv...or laying by the pool! Haha. Stiff and sore when I get up. My skin is SUPER SENSITIVE! Clothes that just lightly brush it...feels irritating. I constantly am lightly massaging. Those lipoed sides about killed me off! I still want to hold the sides of my stomach when I walk...to keep the movement of my muscle and skin to a minimum. Right now...I'm lounging in a chair...and feeling pretty damn good.

The not so good!

Wanted to make a separate post on something that happened earlier. I had on mepetic tape. Loved it. Took a shower with it on. Dried it. Thought a little moisture got in the center...pressed it out. Fine. A day or so later...i could tell something was wrong. It was like if you had a bandaid on...and your wound was goopy. There had been a spot where the ps assistant pressed out some blood...and that spot had a thicker scab. Well...now it was whitish. I was afraid pus. But it wasn't red around it. So I hoped just the scab had become soft and white. The middle part of my insision had lost the scabs....but was red, and a little weepy. So I cleaned it up...made me a little woozy...and hoped for the best. Gonna keep the tape off till I see ps on the 5...then put it on when I go home. I felt I looked SO GOOD with that tape on...Couldn't see the scabs...The dog ears...The pleating. So when I took it off....i was disheartened. That's why I didn't post for a few days. Also...i felt I hadn't been improving. With me...my journey didn't go..."you'll see improvement every day". I really haven't improved that much in the last week...except for yest. Morning! ! I woke up and I could breathe ! Lol I mean..really breathe...deep breaths. I had been breathing so shallowly...Cuz my stomach couldn't expand! Now my stomach can move...i can hold it in...and it can now " hang out"! So there was my improvement for the week....BREATHING! I also I'm trying to pick up my pace when I walk. Not hold my stomach. Or back. Swing my arms a little more. .. i mean geez...i gotta get thus walking down. ..I'm going back to work the 10th. Only part time. I'm self-employed. Yay for me!

So there is my in depth review at 3 weeks. Nothing too humorous to report. Kind of at a standstill. ..but expecting change is right around the cornet!
And hey...did I mention...i look HOT!

When can I get in the pool. bath?

I'm a bath person. Probably cuz I'm lazy and like to sit! But I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to get back up! Chiklet said when the incision is closed. It is closed. No weeping/seeping...but a few minor scabs. Is that ok? I see the ps on the 5. I suppose I could email him. But you girls know just as much!!! Teehee

4 wks and 2 days. Just a quick pic after shower...With Mepitac tape on

Update later tonite. Lots to tell. I slept on my side last night. Still a struggle!

5 weeks....thought was 6!

Sorry about not doing the update. Flew back home the next day. Being with bf....going through a month of mail....and putting away clothes (and trying on clothes that were always too small...but hoping some day they would fit...and now they DO!!! ) plus worked (did some 'hair') one day. Today i was tiling a little bit in my bathroom. Tomorrow m going to grout a bit. Then Wed., Thur. and Friday, I'm going in to work.
Anyway....I'm going to go back a week or so for my update.

My mom, sis and her husband came to the condo where i was. They are staying 3 months. She has 2 condo's in the same gated community. So they moved to one....and i stayed in the one i had been in. One night i was sitting there in the dark, watching tv in just my spanx CG and nothing else....like i did every night. Someone knocked on the door...and i said "come on in"...thinking it was my sis. It was the paramedics! They asked if I had called 911. I hadn't. A few min. later i called my sis to tell her the funny story....and here they were suppose to be at the 'other condo" mom was sitting on the toilet....eyes wide open and unresponsive. YIKES. Sis thought she had a stroke or something...but it was close to a diabetic coma. They gave her glucose and took her to the hospital. She came home the next day. We went to visit her...and my sis said everyone in the hospital was having the flu, and hoped we didn't get it.
2 days later, i had gone to bed around 3 in the morning! I love watching HGTV! lol About 7 i got up to go potty....and i had that familiar nauseous feeling again. I thought ohhhh noooo....and yep. A few minutes later i was trying to puke my guts out. Just bloody bile.....which then worried me. Heaved a few more times. Broke out in a sweat....then chills. Then went back to bed. A few minutes later....up heaving again. Back to bed. Then again. I thought CRAP...i picked up the flu! I'm suppose to be going to the dr. to get the stitches all taken out (they missed the ones in my back from the lipo....and a few in my incision) and I'm suppose to be flying home in 3 days. By 9, i was woke up by the nurse confirming my appt. I told her i had been vomiting....but i was feeling better then. I didn't feel perfect all day.....but wasn't sick. So i tell people...i didn't even have the 24 hour flu...i only had the ONE HOUR FLU! Thank God!

When i got home, i was lugging my very heavy "purse" bag....whatever it was. And by the time i got out where the bf was sitting....i was looking 'pained'...lol And other than straining a back muscle bending over and tying my shoe....I've been pretty good. The hardest part so far is sleeping. The BF decided he was going to shape up and be nice! He now tells me constantly that he loves me. I think because he now KNOWS i'm HOT....lol....he's afraid i'll go find someone else! I told him that i had given up on him, and when i came back from Florida, i was going to start the dating search again! (well....after i could walk anyway! hahaha) So anyway, I'm very comfortable laying on my side, with my head on his arm....and my belly resting on his big belly for support!!!! lol I slept in my own bed last night....and i never realized how damn HARD it was! I think i'm going to go out and buy an 'egg crate' foam thingy to put over the mattress! Poor pup doesn't know where to sleep i have so many pillows in my bed....not to mention the huge body pillow i bought to put between my legs. I told bf it was my substitute bf! I have a chihuahua....and she usually slept there!!! HA!
So I can now take a bath. I colored my hair today. Put some tile on an upstairs bath. I was planning on tiling it all....but instead paid someone to do it while i was in Florida. And they're just finishing it. I'm going to grout it myself tomorrow. I did a little 'hair' last Friday, but no massages. Going to go to work Wed, Thur. and Fri. and do some light massages also. Going to work 5 hours on Thurs....and for me that's a full day. So glad I'm self-employed.
I've been home 5 days and all i've done is put away my clothes....and gone through a month of mail!
NO RUSH!
My bf is treating me the way he treated me before...and even better! We'll see how long it lasts! He said he liked me just fine the way i was before.....but he KNOWS I'm feeling so much sexier now! i LOVE the way i look in clothes. I feel uncomfortable only after swelling at night. I can't walk fast...but i did go out for a walk Sunday. It was cold and snowy. I am having car problems...my Bunn coffee maker decided to die when i was gone.... But i got a smile a mile wide! OH.....and i lost a GOOD 8 pounds during all of this! I only have to lose 7 more....and I'll be what i was when i was married at 32! My bf looked at a pic I found when i was in Mexico in my 40's. He said he never would have recognized me. I was heavier....and short hair. I am WAAAY sexier now!
Hey IMATH....do i sound happy now???
YIPPEE!
I can't wait to go kayaking this summer....making lots of vacation plans!

l am so upset. post review

And it didnt post. Ugh.

darn. was hoping the hole had closed

But when taking pics I could see discoloration. Ugh so I will uncover it. And take pics while I do so..

see? looks better from a distance

I had written a LONG post on heaving my insides out all last thurs. Night...and taking my tape off yest to take a bath...and thick pinkish blood gushed out onto my leg. Of course I reported it all in gory detail. Then my ph lost it all. Don't feel up to telling it all over. I little bummed.

Finally my 7 week review! And lots of pics!!! YAY!

I'm still down 8 or so pounds...had so much to tell in the last few weeks...and now can't remember. The time i wrote a big review...and then lost it, was about my 'hole' gushing forth thick pink/red goop onto my leg. That tiny hole has pretty much healed up. I kept blow drying it shut! lol I'm not totally flat when i sit down...but i don't care. I'm a little bigger on one side, than the other...but i don't care. I have a small dog ear...but i think it's 'cute'. I tried on jeans last night that i haven't worn for years....moved into stretchy yoga pants instead. I wore the jeans/capri's when i first met my ex-fiance....and was going thru a divorce. lol. Got thinner...but still had that hanging gut! NO MORE! Yippeeee. I did puke my guts out again last week. Don't know why. That is 3 times in less than 2 weeks...but so far this week....just fine and dandy! I can know say that I'm comfy on my sides. I even SPRAWLED in bed last night...and felt oh so good. Didn't wear my binder the last 2 nights. So tight and bulky and the wrinkles dig into my newly curved hips. I'm amazed how i sink in when i lay on my side. I call them my 'arm rests'. I mean really...sheesh....big 'indents'...who knew this is how people are suppose to look! lol I still don't have that gorgeous hourglass figure laying down...or much standing up either...hahaha...but i don't care! When i've had a pouchy stomach ALL MY LIFE...it looks so good to have it flat! I'm still not thin by any means...but that will have to go away by dieting. My numbness in my sides are lessening...and feels good to massage. I have started to DO massage now also. Also grouting my bathroom. I did have some stabbing pain on my bottom right side. Funny, now the only pain/discomfort in around my incision...whereas before it was all in my back and sides.....took away pain in belly! Totally numb below BB...but the rest of my stomach is starting to FEEL like real skin. Still really tight! I tell everyone i meet...here...feel my stomach how HARD it is! lol Plus i feel sexy. I spent all this week trying on all my old sexy lingerie and taking pics of myself and sending it to bf at work! Entertainment for both of us! I have a LOT of photos I've taken during this whole experience...but was not able to print because i was on my phone. Downloaded them to my big computer....and am on here now....so get prepared!

I will just download pics in small increments.

They are all about the same...but ya know......when you're hot you're hot...and i'm a pic person now! LOL

oops....was suppose to press...more pics...not update

My BB was a little dampish the other day. So i stuck a q-tip in there...and got out a little brownish stuff...ugh. Don't know how far in i can stick the q-tip since it's numb...and feels weird. Lots of close ups of the same old thing...

Last night....after i even ate a big dinner.

Taken around midnite.....tried on some old jeans that i use to wear....but had tummy stuffed into them! Now no tummy to stuff! YAY Also....capri's are what i wore back in 2007 after my divorce...i had these on when i met my future fiance. Always had them in my drawer as my 'dream' pants to get back into. I put both those pants on without any problem. The capri's actually fit UNDER the scar....so that was good for comfort.

8 weeks today/2 months (Feb. 8) since the flat side

I really don't look that much different...other than i got on the scale today and i gained 3 pounds! Went to a party Sat. I made brownies...chips and cheese dip....spinach dip and toasted bread...meatballs....um....i think that's it. Wonder why i'm fat?
Anyway....since last Thurs. I've had a dull burning pain in my right side...close to my incision....especially when i bend over. Even a little bit. Just to pick up a towel. I hold my hand over the spot. It's not there all the time...only when i bend. But it hurts....and makes me CRABBY! lol
We had a big snowstorm here yesterday...so I canceled out my massage. She was my only customer...and i told her i couldn't shovel out my van...or my driveway. Hope she understands! Other than that new pain....and gaining 3 pounds...I'm fine. (Probably the new pain is from having sex...teehee) oh well....I went to the party and couldn't help pulling up my shirt and making everyone admire my stomach!!! I'd say...TOUCH IT...see how HARD it is! lol Probably from all the swelling yet...and numbness. But I think they were impressed! They're all my kayaking buddies....can't wait for summer to start paddling...and looking cute doing it! I'll post a pic of me right this minute with my pup. Then I'll post pics that i have never posted before! They are the day of the surgery. Quite gruesome!

More pics of the first few days!

Just some more pics that i was unable to post the first few days! GF took pics...but i wasn't capable of doing it all from my camera!

today! 8 week!

I look the same. Here are my some old 'un-tanned' legs imath! Blizzard outside. Pup and her fur coat that she hates....us laying by a fake fire....while i do these reviews! lol

Was going to post on Feb. 8...but lots going on....and it's not good!

The day after my last post (sunday) that Monday I found out my friend who had brain cancer, was in hospice. Even tho the snow was deep, i ventured outside and met another friend, and we went to visit her. Suffice it to say, it was extremely sad. She had txted me and left me a voicemail the beginning of Dec. wishing me luck on my TT. Now she could hardly speak. She asked how 'puppy' was. She told me "I am in hospice, we come here to die". She was to be 61 in March. What can you say to that, except I'm so sorry.
As i was driving home, i found out the BF was in my town with his Gdaughter who only lives a mile from me. I said, Call when you are done with her. I was rushing home, hoping that he could drop by and give me a hug before he went home. I was 2 blocks from home, when he called, and we even passed each other on the road. I asked him to turn around and just see me for 10 min. to give me a hug. He wouldn't...he wanted to get home. It was 9pm. he was tired. I was hurt, and he knew it. Next day he txted like nothing happened. I didn't answer. He never txted or called for the next 2 days, and neither did i. Finally i reached out...and he ignored me. I drove to his house this weekend. Some ups and downs. I did walk 3 miles with him on Sat. with big boots on. My incision..or some spot down there hurt a little...but not as much as the ankle bone that got rubbed raw!!! lol So anyway, Sunday i got the 'I need space" talk. I cried. I never called him, but he called once Mon., Once tues. Both were very short and brief. Wed. last night, I talked to him for over an hour....about the relationship!!! The thing he hates most. I had asked him when i came back from Florida, if he would take me out for Valentines day, somewhere special! I had bought a new dress down there, and new heels! I wanted to go out and be arm candy!! For 2 weeks, i reminded him how i wanted to go out and look good! He only took me out once since I've been home...to eat...and that was at the grocery store food court. He called because we were invited to a party on Sat. I said, well weren't you going to take me out to eat? He said, "no". I said, well....maybe we could go to the party, and another day go out to eat. He said "no".
Anyway, last night didn't go to well. At the end, i asked if he missed me. The same question i asked when i was in Florida, 4 days after my TT. And again, it made him crabby! He said, can't i just want to talk to you...and not mean i miss you? So this morning...i txted him a happy morning. He called a bit later. By then i was wondering if i should just ask if he was still in love with me. So i did. He beat around the bush, and said there was all kinds of love. But eventually he said i was a wonderful, very sweet and kind person. But then i was crying. But he said it was all or nothing for me. Why couldn't we be friends? You see, we started off at friends. For 6 months we were BEST friends, but then he dumped me because he wanted to become intimate and i didn't. I said 'dating' messed things up. Well...i didn't want to lost him, so we became intimate, and he started in with the hot/cold thing. In Sept. i started seeing someone else, and him too. He finally yelled at me, and said he didn't want a relationship with me. So fine. I started dating the other guy. For ONE MONTH we never talked. Longest we had ever gone. You have to realize, we'll have had been friends since June 2 years ago..and intimate since last April....Anyway. He called and texted ...and i finally reponded. This was at the end of Oct. He said he was in love with me. I dumped new guy....for Tom. Buy the time i was leaving for Florida...he was turning cold again. But the month away (plus i didn't talk to him for 9 days!!!) He came to visit me on my birthday Dec. 24. He was crazy over me! Said he was going to change. Started saying he loved me every DAY!!! Something he never had done. And now....we had one fight....and it's over. Just 10 days ago i had txted him, 'can't wait to see you tonite...i love you so much'. ugh
So there. Now I'm depressed. I don't feel like taking pictures. I don't feel like working. I don't feel like anything. I was feeling so good. I was so happy. He made me feel so sexy. I told him, i had never felt so loved in my whole life. And it's true! He had been so great.....for one month. And just like before...he turns cold. He actually asked if we could just be friends. I said no. I also said i didn't want to be FWB. He said he didn't want that either....just friends. Ugh. I reminded him that he pulled away from me last year, and started seeing another woman...because he wouldn't get intimate with him! So that is my rant. My life. I was soooo excited for this coming year. I wanted to be healed so he and i could go kayaking. We made all these plans. We were even looking at the map this weekend....for places to go....

I know i shouldn't talk about my personal life on here. But how can someone txt on Jan. 11....it was so nice waking up with you this morning sweetness ....and a month later have fallen out of love. Sucks. Yes...my happy place...my happy attitude...my happy everything is GONE!

OK...i guess i should do an update on my TT...not my life!

My stomach has finally gotten softer! It is so funny, because before it was as hard as a rock....and numb...and tingly....and weird. Now that it is softening up....i can grab some skin...ie. flab....but it's more naturally me. Unfortunately with softness....it means it can bulge out more. Usually after i get dumped...i lose weight...hoping that is the case. Last night i sat on here with a bag of chips. And tonite it's been coffee and biscotti. oops.
I use to say i was a square....40-40-40. But now I'm approx. 40-35-37. But then again...the measurements were taken with a METAL tape measurer! lol I'll try to stay positive. But it's hard. I got back on the dating site tonite....checked out all the losers....and deleted myself back off!

Ok relationship question

We were suppose to go out to eat with a small group of people sat. Just found out wed. When Tom said he wasn't taking me out to show off my new bod and dress. The hostess is one of my best friends..thru kayaking. ..knew her and Hubby before tom. Anyway. ..now I wasn't gonna go...Cuz tom was. Now after reading comments on here...i think I should just go...and ignore him. Sigh. Will be only like 6 people. Going out to eat and then to her house for dessert and play games. Ugh. If I go I will be hurting...If I stay home I'll be miserable and hurting. I thought about going....looking REALLY GOOD...and ignore him. But was who am I kidding??? I'm a very emotional person...and I just found out he doesn't love me yesterday. If I go....He'll be getting his cake and eating it too! As in seeing me...talking to me....but not having to take me home with him....lol. like your input. Maybe I'll take a valium....and say...up yours! If I could get my mind wrapped around that ploy...As in ....haha...look what you're missing out on! Rather than.....Poor me. He doesn't love me anymore...

Was 3 months March 8

And i actually feel 'normal'. Have to admit...i haven't worn my binder in over a week....or much of any cg...and my stomach is protruding more! I guess the skin is getting more lax and my insides (and fat) are pushing it out more. Now just to start dieting...since i really haven't been. At first you can't eat much....much less inhale...cuz the skin is stretched so taunt! But now....things have softened up and i can grab the nice little rolls of fat!!! hahaha

I bought a new van a week ago cuz i had to drive 6 hours to go to an Aunt and Uncles memorial service. So after 2 years of looking...i finally had to 'do' it. Now i have a nice car and a new body! While i was in the hotel room...i had a full length mirror...so took pics.

My gf who had the brain cancer died, and i went to her memorial service 2 weeks ago.

The bf...well...i wasn't posting about him.....cuz i never new where 'we' were at. On Valentines Day.....because of you...i decided to doll myself up...and go to the party. But he called me that morning, and asked if he could pick me up and take me...as a date. Things were still never smooth sailing until the end of Feb. He became so loving. Course he was going to texas for a week for a class!! I stayed at his house, tending the home fires....and i mean that literally. He heats his house solely by a small wood burning stove. And it got to below 0 many times last week. That whole week he told me he loved me...blah, blah, blah. I didn't see him until Sat. night. I drove home 6 hours to see him. The next day....a fall out. And again yest. Today i heard nothing from him. Sooooo....back to square one. You see....when something goes wrong...i like to 'talk about it'...and he wants to ignore it. He says he HATES relationship talks....and gets to CRABBY....and blows everything out of proportion! So it was really good for 10 days!!! lol....while he was gone....lol

Anyway...i would start to look around, but there just isn't anyone out there in my age group~! I'm just going to do what i have to do....work on my house...kayak....and walk with my friends. Tom (bf guy) and i walked about 2 mi. Yesterday. It was our first nice warm day! It had been 11 degrees last week....45 yesterday...and 60 degrees today! YAY. Anyway, i told Tom....I sure can walk a lot better now can't i? And he agreed. I was back to my reg. pace. Today i walked with our meetup group along the Mississippi river and saw a TON of eagles. I was walking with this one guy...and we outpaced the other 3 behind us...of course they WERE older!!! lol

At 3 months i can sleep now without my binder, and feel comfortable. Clothes swishing against my bare tummy doesn't bother me. Going over the bumps in the road don't hurt. I can lay anywhere and anyhow in bed...comfortably!! YaY! Last week my back 'flanks' was still numb. My stomach still gets really hard in front. But in general, the skin has loosened up...hence my stomach now protrudes more! DARN. Now it is up to me to diet....and strengthen muscles...or just learn to hold my tummy in. Soooo...I'm not as skinny as i was...but i was doing this to loose the HANGING FAT! And i did.

Oh....and when i went to the funeral, and saw cousins i hadn't seen in years...the first thing they said to me was...."YOU LOOK SO TINY!" Ha....no one has ever said that to me! 'course i was dressed all in black too! I told them i had a TT. They said, but you must have lost weight too! well...I am thinner than i was at my heaviest. I am fluctuating between 141 and 143. So like i said, if i lost 10 pounds I'd be at the weight i was pre kids. Doable.

I put a waist cincher on tonight...cuz I'm not liking the 'pot' I'm developing. I'm wondering if i would have kept my binder on, if it would have kept my skin from stretching out??? oh well...i still look good in clothes...when i stand!

AND....not too bad for 60 I must add......

Oh....and thought I'd throw in a pic of Valentine's Day

After all of your comments...i decided what i was going to wear...and make a grand entrance. But he called....and wanted to take me! Probably so he wouldn't have to answer any questions of 'where is carla???' lol So i will post a pic of me that morning. I WAS holding in my stomach...and trying to look as good as possible...so take it with a grain of salt! lol

Went out and bought a TON of clothes!

I don't really need any clothes...i have plenty that just look better on me since sx....but since I'm alone and bummed...and i had a 30% off coupon from Kohls.....what the heck! So i went! Did i have a good time!!! I can't remember the last time i tried on clothes and was actually HAPPY about almost everything i put on! Leggings with shorter cropped top kinda sweaters, etc. Before everything had to be LONG to go over my belly. Now its...'what belly?'

Then i went to see my friend that stayed with me the first 10 days after sx. She went back to her state of Mississippi for the winter, and had breast reconstruction sx from breast cancer about 4 years ago. She just came back home Sunday....so I'm glad i could go visit her while I'm boo-hooing over Tom. When i first met Tom...I had just met her also.....and we were the 3 musketeers! Oh well.

The first thing she said when she saw me, was YOU LOST WEIGHT! The last time she had seen me was 10 days after sx. I said, not really. Just the swelling went down.

Then i did the style show for her....and modeled my new hot body!

Tom doesn't know what he's missing!

Just because....

I finally downloaded some pics i took last week. I have still seen Tom....but less frequently. I left his house in tears last night. Long story...and won't rehash. He was in bed. I took my pup's bed from his house that has been there since Nov. If he see's it's missing...i guess he'll realize what's happening. I also deactivated my fb page today, so i won't be stalking him. Enough of that. Sad.

So I'm still chubby. Not dieting. Feeding the blues. But i took this pic in the Kohls changing rm...while i was still happy with Tom. I txted him....am i going thru a midlife crisis because I'm buying clothes in the jr. dept.??? ( i read an article of men going thru midlife crisis...i think it's him!) Then i txted him: Can't get too big of a head...since when i went to check out, she gave me the senior discount....even the the discount doesn't start til you're 63!!!! Argh

The pics are taken in the changing rm. because the scars look to wide and red. I do have bumps (scar tissue) under the skin that feels like peas. I think it's from the stitches. Anyway, I look at some of you girls on here ( i won't name names!!! lol) and think...HOT DAMN YOU GIRLS LOOK GOOD.....whatcha complaining about!!!??? I went to my gf's birthday party Sat. (the same group of people...that include Tom...dang) and i looked so damn good! tee hee. I had on black leggings and a crop top cowl sweater....and spike heels! lol I knew i would be mostly SITTING! I drove up in my white convertible...first time this year...and everyone commented on how good i looked!!! I think it's been the first time in my entire LIFE!!! (course remember...this is friends....not family....) So here are my latest pics...in my Jr. dept. cut up jeans....lol....and close up of scars. I was hoping that the bright lights of the changing rm. would show what the scars looked like in real life. Today i have tape on them...and my tightest corset. Just for the fun of it....!!

Finally took pics of the ps pic's that he took. Before and 4 weeks after.

Yeah, lovely. I wish i knew how to do side by sides....lol But this was before....gosh darn.....and 4 weeks later just before i went home. Really don't look much different now, except for my sides and back from all that swelling went down. That's why we look like we have no butt!!! SWELLING! I love wearing a corset, and black leggings now. My BUTT BELLY is GONE, GONE, GONE....and i only have my butt sticking out now...and i love it when it's little! I'm not one that needs a big booty!!!! lol

Also the skin and fat they cut off...and the lipo. Don't know the weight or the quantity. They seemed not to know. I asked them to take pics of it. I should write and ask if they have any records....either way....pictures are worth a thousand words....

Tom update!

Nothing for 2 days. I knew he was pulling away...so if i didn't contact him...he wouldn't contact me! So much for the 'verbal' agreement that we would be in an exclusive relationship for ONE YEAR...til Nov. 1. That way we were to enjoy the whole summer and fall together...since he screwed up my summer and fall last year...by being hot/cold. ugh So this is what my facebook post said, and what he posted the next morn. I know he was being facetious.... but i thought both 'posts' were so appropriate! I guess that was our 'break up' talk...lol...through fb pics. sigh

Hi folks! April 8...just realized it was 4 months today.

No pics. Don't feel up to it. Depressed. Had Easter at my house. Went for a walk with the meetup group. He was there. Tried to be cheery. But was dying inside. Gonna take myself off alll the meetup sites. Friends are siding with him....and hating my whining.
On a good note....my sis and mom came back from Florida. She brought me the dresses i bought down there. I tried them all on and looked good...make that great!! Just don't know where i will wear them, since they are sexy body hugging black dresses....lol
I do have dog ears...buy no biggy unless I'm naked and looking.
I walked alone through a wooded area and up and down a ravine...just me and my dog....and was glad i felt so much energy and didn't bother me at all.
So i have to say...at 4 months i'm feeling good. My stomach is hard and numb below BB....and sometimes it feels weird and i have to massage it! One side of my tummy is still fatter than the other.....but i had more flab hanging on that side before the TT.
I look good just letting my tummy 'all hang out'...but i look GREAT when i hold it in! Now what do i do with my big fat arms....and my aging face?
The last time i saw Tom....he said my body looked so young. ugh.

May 8....5 months po.

Can't say i look better than last month...but it might be the boxes of choc. chip cookies I've been eating...or....well...more cookies. I was going to do my review a few days ago...when i was feeling 'up'....cuz you know who contacted me. Again....he turns cold. I should know better and not be always bewildered by the things he says when in the throes of 'wanting me'...to the next day. lol
so onward with the storyline.
Tonite I've had a small ache in the middle of my stomach on my left side. Its sort of where he bruised me with the lipo. It's sort of weird, cuz at first i didn't know what that round bruise on my stomach was from....then after the bruising went away, you could still see the circle 'indent'. Now i realize it's some small boo-boo from the lipo.
I still have pooches of fat on my sides at the ends of the scar....especially on my left side. I can really grab a HANDFUL of skin...versus the other side. But when i bend over to the right side...it uses all that extra skin to stretch!!! So i guess that's good.....IF i ever did side stretches!

I did go out of town this past weekend and kayaked 13 miles one day...and 6 the next. I am possibly going on a 3 day paddle over memorial day....and tenting on a sandbar one night. I had hoped Tom would be doing that with me...but now it looks like he won't. So i will be doing it ALONE! Which is totally out of my comfort level. I am also going on a week long kayaking/tenting trip up in Northern Wisconsin in June. This is the trip that i was hoping to be recovered for after my TT. Thought maybe Tom and i might have to use a tandem. But heck....now I'll be lucky if he shares his tent with me!!! lol The last 2 days of that paddle...is 20 and 21 miles long. I have never paddled over 13 miles in one day in my life....and i'm worn out after that!
So that should be an adventure.
I have to tell you...i have never dumped my kayak....until this past weekend. I had always 'hoped' it would never happen. I kayak with my chihuahua with me. Anyway, i went around a sharp curve...and the current was very swift. I saw a fallen tree trunk, but thought i could avoid it. But nope....the current side swiped me into it. Everything happened so quickly. All i knew was the boat was on top of my head, and i couldn't get my footing. Finally i got out from under the boat...all i could think of was pup! As the boat...and my paddle started washing downstream...i grabbed my boat and by sheer will i flipped it over...AND MY DOG WAS STILL IN THERE! I was so relieve....and then she jumped out into the river. ugh. She swam for me...i grabbed her and pulled my boat to shore. The water was to my waist...i think. My group never even saw it happen. They were still around the curve. Some college students were canoeing....and one capsized the same place i did. My group was busy getting a rope...and had to pull them out. Finally my friend say me....soaking wet...and asked what happened! lol Thanks. Another canoeist rescued my paddle and my camera that was floating by it! Thank God it was a water proof camera....and was saved!
The point behind this story was....if i can survive a half torn off toenail....bruised up knee...and who knows WHAT kind of stomach muscles were being used...i guess i can survive just about anything!

Now onto a new adventure. After bf was telling everyone we were over...i called my old ex fiance and told him i needed a road trip...i was depressed. He said he was trying to end it with his gf (he's a lousy rat too...but now he's someone's else's lousy rat!!! lol) And he wanted to go to his cousins wedding in Florida. I know him also. So we are going to share expenses...i'm taking my new van. Gonna wear a bunch of new swimming suits...my new dresses....dance my butt off....and golf....and play in the sand and sun! Everything that my part time bf won't ever do with me. It will be nice to dress up and look sexy...rather than just be hiking and laying in a tent like usual.....lol
Leaving next Wed. and be gone for a week. Will take lots of pics of me looking sexy! Yeah!

6 month review and pics!

6 months...and 2 days ago....i was shuffling out of surgery. Don't remember much...lol. I am sitting here today in my hot house, and a corset on. When i walk a lot....i still have twinges in my tummy. OR even if I'm not doing a damn thing...which is often. People all think it's the scar area that is bothersome. It's not. I tell them the 'scar' was the easy part. It was the lipoed sides and tummy.

I have a spot (looks kinda like an indent circle) from the lipo...that still gets sore. In the first pics...it was that circular bruise...it's in the front. Taking pics today, i see an indent on my side. Hadn't ever noticed it before....must be the light...and angle.

I am leaving Friday to go on a 92 mile kayak paddle down a river in northern Wisconsin. Going with 'Tom' and another guy friend. Tom...ugh...been off and on. He's nice when he hasn't seen or talked to me in over a week. *shrugs*

I was concerned about taking this trip, and hoping that i would be healed enough by now. But i think wearing a corset...and my TIGHT life jacket...should give me enough compression. My scar is still ugly...but i don't look at it. My dog ears bother me...but i just pull my undies up over them. I love that i don't have a big hanging belly. I feel sexy. I do have a fatter bulge on my left side...but that is where i had more fat and skin to begin with. I can pinch a couple of inches on that side...and only an inch on the other. When i sit i have an over hang a bit. BUT...you have to realize i have NEVER been skinny with a flat stomach....ever.

Remember when they say, if you over eat...your fat will have to go somewhere cuz the fat cells from your stomach and sides have been sucked, sliced and diced? I thought for SURE they would end up in my fat arms! But nooooo....my thighs are now thunder thighs! OMG...i use to have nice legs!

Going to the wedding....etc....i have gained 6 pounds in the last month...from my lowest. ugh. Yest. all i ate were cookies and this yummy coconut creme pie. That's it!



So maybe paddling 92 miles....and swatting mosquitoes...will help with that.
On with the pics....well maybe not. Can't get it off the site i have them on...waagh

still trying on pics...

Fort Myers Plastic Surgeon

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