I have never felt like myself with my implants...
I have never felt like myself with my implants (mentor 275cc silicone "gummie bear") and am sooooo excited that today I have finalized all of the paperwork on their removal! This website has been so helpful to me in providing information, support, and courage.
I am 45 and have had implants since I was 37. Naturally I was a 34 medium B. After my child my weight was lower than before and I had considerably less breast tissue, making me asmall 34B. I thought, why keep wearing all of these padded bras when I can just get implants? DUMB. It was a tough time in my marriage and we both thought, big boobs, yes! Even bumber. With implants I'm a medium/full C. I will be very happy to be a small B again.
The problem is I have never felt like they were mine and I've hated any attention they have ever brought. I don't wear tight shirts or plunging necklines, and the fine ballerina's posture I was trained to have is often hiding, with shoulders slumped to keep the boobs in. I am 5'7'' and 125 and very active. I love yoga and it has brought me so much joy over the years but I feel so self-conscious as my big, hard boobs stick off my rib cage during most of the poses. I want to lay on my yoga mat without two little cantaloupes between us!
I naturally am more of a booty girl and my chest is thin and flat, with my ribs showing. I never felt the implants looked like they could even remotely have come with a figure like mine. They also made me feel like I looked heavier in clothes and I have a hard time finding tops that actually fit my shoulders and waist but that don't pop open or pull across the bust line, with the alternate larger size looking baggy and frumpy. Total mismatch here!
I am getting explanted with no lift. I'm fine with sagging, I'm older and have had a kid. I've had some cc on the right side that is definitely getting worse with time, making my implants look harder and squished up, moving up my chest and not hanging down naturally.
My husband has been super supportive, "I just want you to be happy." But I am a little worried I won't feel so hot with my bra off. We'll see. I'm happy to buy new, cute, lacy bras that look great on small boobs.
It's three weeks until my procedure. I'm going back to my same PS as I trust him very much and felt the office treated me professionally and with great care.
Thanks to all of you who have posted your stories before me. It has been such a huge help.
Feeling good about my decision
Thank you Hlp105, littlehugger883, and Nicole N for the welcome. Each day that I get closer to my explant I know this is the right decision for me. I pride myself on being honest and real and I know my implants are not part of that story. I'm not against implants or doing anything else that makes one feel good about oneself, I just know they don't fit my body and lifestyle and I will feel better when they are gone.
I actually have had two sets, first time asking for a C and getting a D. Disastrous though very sexy! I had them reduced but still, just not right for me. This website has really helped me navigate the route to take: "Lift?", "What kind of lift?", "Smaller implants?", "Fat injections?" It got very overwhelming before I found this site. Now I know I can just get them taken out and will happily (hopefully!) deal with what's left.
Thank you for the support and sharing,
"What happened to Mommy's boobies?" Has Anyone Had to Explain to Their Little Girl?
I have a 10 year old who sees me naked plenty and, as she is now a "tween", probably way more than she'd like! We have often showered together over the years and she's used to "mommy's big boobies". It's funny because when she was six she actually told my mother, "my mommy's boobies are much bigger than yours!" Awful!!! :$
I am going to stay at my sister's for surgery and few days of recovery before I will be home. There will clearly be a difference in my boobs the next time she sees me naked. I am totally perplexed about what, if anything, to tell her. She's so innocent and honest and I know she will be really confused about why I would ever get implants in the first place. She doesn't even know what implants are!
Perhaps I should wait and make something up? Mommy lost some weight (in her breast only...?) On the flip side I feel so much better being able to show her the real me. She is petite and athletic with zero body fat and I expect she will have nice but very small breasts when she matures. I've always felt like a charlatan with her seeing mine and expecting she would be a C too when she grows up.
Any stories to share are much appreciated lovely ladies,
Two days til surgery and in need of post-op bra suggestions!
Hello lovely ladies. I haven't been able to log on for some time. Super busy with per-op doctors appts and blood work, including my first EKG! ( a must do for my doctor if you're over 45....wahhhh,) and wrapping things up at work, getting our daughter home from camp and ready for school, marathon laundry and grocery shopping so I don't feel awful leaving my family for 12 days. I'm on my layover en route to my sister's in Miami for my procedure on Thursday.
Yesterday I went to Target, TJMaxx and Khol's in search of a zip front compression bra with no luck. Tomorrow is my only day to shop. Any suggestions on a great post-op easy to put on compression bra?
On a side note I had to go to a chiropractor last week with serious pain from out of place ribs. He snapped me back together but god was I in pain before! I think I've totally whacked my posture from both trying to stand up tall whilst shrugging my shoulders forward to hide my boobs. I know I feel their weight in my neck always and can't wait to have it "off my chest!"
Promise to update more now that ex-planting is my full time job!
Tomorrow is the day!
21 Aug 2013
Day of treatment
I went to my pre-op and all is set for surgery at 6 am! Yikes, means I have to be there at 5:30 but at least it will be over before most people wake up. My PS is a bit concerned with how much sagging I might have. Ughhh, we'll see... I am only having local so I hope to not feel so disoriented tomorrow.
I must say it's a little unnerving to be going breast implant free in Miami where it seems nearly every woman has them. I am just reminding myself that being an authentic me is where I feel best. At lunch today my girlfriends talked about how great it will be for me to be able to wear tank tops and be "waif like." They said maybe I'll start a trend, lol!
More soon and thanks for your support!
Implants are out and I feel great!
Everything went really well this morning without complications. My capsules are still in and the doctor was very pleased with how they look! I took one pain pill this morning and had a very nice nap. Think I will take one at bedtime but for now am feeling amazingly well! My sister has been an ANGEL and made me homemade chicken soup. My own Florence Nightengale :)
Posting a pic here. Wow does it feel good to have those hard balls out of me!
As ever, thank you sweet ladies,
Day 2 and so happy
Hi everyone. Just a quick update to say yay, they're out! The recovery is soo much easier than when the implants go in. I am not going to use the pain meds anymore, just Tylenol if I need it. My implants were 275cc memory gel, which I figure weighed a pound and a half or so. That doesn't sound like much but wow what a difference in my neck and chest and back! I no longer gave that tight feeling on my chest and that tightness in between my shoulder blades that I had always chalked up to stress and age. Happy!
New bra, size small ????
I am wearing a new bra, gift from a friend, and it is a wireless size small! Feels so great. My bandages come off today and stitches come out Friday. I bought a new blazer yesterday, also size small. With the old boobs I had to buy a medium to close the front.. I really wish I would have done this years ago. I'm so thankful for RealSelf and the women here showing me how it was all possible.
Very happy post op but housework is hard!
I am healing well and so so pleased with results. To commemorate I bought a dish with a portrait of a woman from c. 1900 with breast that are undeniably real and wonderful.
I've made it my new profile pic:) I am back home and will admit housework is hard. It was much easier with my sister taking care of me! I am too much of a clean freak so it's my own fault. Reminding myself to rest and the laundry can wait!
13 Days Post Op
Here are pictures 13 days post-op. Incision marks are still red and bumpy but overall I have no complaints. I went for a 45 minute walk today to try and get some exercise but took it very slowly. I get tired more easily and definitely don't want to do any bouncy type activity. My PS recommend not wearing compression/sports bras as he thinks they restrict blood flow and thus impede healing. Still super happy with my decision!!!
3 1/2 weeks post ex-plant and the mostly ups and a few downs
I haven't been able to write in longer than I'd like. Full time job, family, and reality make it hard to check in. That said, thank you for your continued kind feedback and I'm so happy to have connected with some women who are just in the planning stages.
I've had a couple of evenings when I'm trying to get ready to go out or have guests over and I literally change clothes 3 or 4 times. This is not me. I can usually get dressed in 3 minutes. I have realized I have spent the last 8 years dressing around my boobs, mostly to hide them, and now it's totally different! I've put on some outfits that I have always relied on and felt really dumpy. I am not going to buy a whole new wardrobe, totally not needed. I just need to re-learn how to dress to my natural figure. When I get it right I feel slim and strong and fantastic!
Am also three days late on my period which never happens. My belly has been sticking out since the surgery. I think the combo of pain killers and antibiotics has my system way off, even though I'm taking probiotics every day now. No way around it, surgery is a trauma to the body.
Still, all that said, I am so thankful and relaxed that I've explanted.
I went to my first post-op yoga class and was fierce and proud in my tank top!
natural and namaste to all!
Feeling so happy one month plus post op
I have been back in the "full swing" of life for a couple of weeks and am sadly not able to check in on all the wonderful women here as much as I'd like. I just told another gal on the site my surgery and recovery felt like a vacation, lol.
I am healing well and my scars are getting less and less noticeable. I think my breasts have settled and I'm back to a 34B. So glad for this. I think leaving the capsules in definitely helps keep volume so if you can do that I would recommend it.
Here is a picture of me in a favorite new blouse. It fits perfectly and doesn't pull at the buttons. I feel like my chest area looks normal for my shape again. I never was meant to be a big breasted woman and am totally happy being little me again!