32 Year Old Mom of 3 with a Tubular Breast - Fairbanks, AK

I wasn't planning on posting because my breasts made me feel deformed for as long as I've had them. I've felt like I needed to apologize for them every time I was naked. After 9 years with my husband, I still wasn't comfortable naked even though he has always been supportive. Maybe too much damage was done by ex boyfriends. I've had three kids (6, 2 and 8 months) and they've both gotten bigger but as you can tell, there is a very big size difference. The doctor even suggested that I get a ct scan to see if I had Poland's Syndrome. The ct showed I have both chest muscles so that wasn't the issue. They just grew very differently. The process of going through the consultation made me even more uncomfortable with them. I felt an anxiety of hatred towards them. They were on display and everyone voicing how unsymmetrical they were was horrible. I was told one was actually higher so that would be another issue during surgery. I couldn't stand to look at myself when I showered. I felt a little judged by every health professional I saw along the way (my family doctor, cat scan tech, ultrasound tech, mammogram tech, nurses, etc), until they saw my chest. I went from being someone they thought just wanted bigger boobs to the deformed girl that they pitied. I just couldn't get passed it this time. I think it was hard for me to accept that I was never going to come to terms with how I looked. I guess I thought I eventually would. Actually it was too much to emotionally work through. There was no mentally preparing. I just needed it done and my doctor fit in my surgery as soon as he could. So that is my story. 400ccs put into my right breast. 650ccs put into my left. They are under the muscle and high profile. I also got a lift. Part of the price being so high is because I'm in Alaska.

Here are some before and after pictures. The before pictures are from the morning before I left for the hospital. The day after pictures scared me a lot. Since there was a big difference in the size implants, the left breast implant is sitting much higher. The upper pole is extremely filled out in my left breast. I am hoping it will fall and fill out like the right. I started wearing a strap to help. And that pouch on my right breast on the side of the nipple is upsetting. I'm hoping it is swelling that will go down. My doctor said on Friday that the skin will tighten up around the nipple. I really hope so. I'll post more pictures in a couple days.