After 25 Years I'm Sorting out my Severely Asymmetrical Breasts - England, DE

During puberty I noticed over time a difference in the size and shape of my breasts..one grew larger and more rounder than the other. By the time I was 19 I saw my gp, who took one look at me and suggested cosmetic surgery on the nhs! At the time it was a scary thought and I decided to wait until I had had children before going ahead with the op.

Pregnancy and breast feeding (which I could only do from the larger breast) made the problem worse. There is now at least two cup sizes between the breasts. Clothes shopping is so hard. I feel like a freak. I have missed out on a lot over the years because of confidence issues. My husband of 15 years had at least two affairs, and I can't help but wonder if my hideous boobs made things worse... I always hid my body from him and felt he was short changed having me with my breasts :'( We are now divorced, I have started dating but cannot bring myself to remove my bra during sex, so any relationships fizzle out quickly.

I want to move on with my life and stop hating my breasts. My local authority appears to give breast reduction/augmentation for a difference of over 30% (which mine is) after monitoring my bmi for a year. I have a gp appointment tomorrow, where I'm hoping he'll agree my smaller breast is tuberous, as that will allow an instant referral rather than having to wait a year first.

Failing this, I will look into getting it fixed privately. I can't afford it really, but life's too short to be miserable forever.

My mom and older sister are pretty furious with me, they think I "should be grateful for what God has given" me. They keep trying to talk me out of it. I sent them a photo of my boobs, hoping once they saw how weird they look they'd understand, but instead they just said "well no one will see them but you anyway". It's a confidence thing, it's for my benefit, but they don't care :'( Has anyone else had similar problems with lack of support, and what did they do?

My ex husband is very supportive, as is my best friend, who said she'll come on this journey with me and attend each appointment. So fingers crossed for tomorrow...

So yesterday I braved the GP. I had taken a photo of my boobs which I had sent to a private surgeon, so I showed them to my gp and explained pretty much what I told you ladies the other day. My GP was very nice, he said I should not call myself a freak and said that all women were asymmetrical to certain extent. He said he is referring me for the surgery for mental reasons not physical ones.

It really does seem I am blessed to be living in an area with such a generous policy....as I am a non smoker, have a healthy bmi (22.3), have reached sexual maturation (I'm 39!) , and there is a difference in size of more than 30% (he estimated 50%!) then I tick all the boxes. I told him I had arranged a private consult for next week but will struggle to meet the costs, but he said the nhs should fund it. There are no guarantees at this stage of course.

It looked like the referral was made by email there and then. He said I'll hear back from them within 2 weeks...from what I've read I'll have an appointment to check my bmi is healthy and also a full scan of the boobs to check the difference.....this appointment itself might be weeks or even months ahead though....then it all gets sent back to whoever makes the decision...and then I get an appointment to see plastic surgeon. So lots of waiting but it'll save me thousands which I haven't got anyway so I'll have to be patient.

I left feeling so excited! This has been like a shameful secret for so many years, and the thought of feeling "normal" would be fabulous. I am well aware that they might choose to just do a reduction (am currently an A and C cup), but even being a small A in both would be a million times better than feeling like a freak! I have already started looking at backless dresses etc I could wear if that happens. I'm very petite all over, so my body wouldn't look too strange with small breasts.

It's been suggested I post a photo. I'm scared it'll get leaked to the wrong places and I'll be made fun of, as my boobs are without a doubt more extreme than any I've seen on here. I do value your support though, perhaps I'll post individual photos of each instead.

Love to all,

x

So individual photos of my C cup left breast, which is okay ish, just a bit droopy, and my awful A cup right boob, which has constricted growth, that one didn't produce breast milk and I think it's tubular. Hopefully now you'll all understand why I've felt like a freak :'( and why I need support in getting these fixed x