I hit puberty at 12, grew breasts for 5 minutes,...
I hit puberty at 12, grew breasts for 5 minutes, and stopped. I've never actually NEEDED a bra, and could barely fill out a 36A with silicone chicken cutlet enhancers. I consoled myself with the thought that I'd have kids some day and grow boobs when that time came along.
Fast forward to today. I'm 37, I have 4 kids, and I was unable to breastfeed any of them. My OB diagnosed me with glandular insuffiency - basically, I don't have any milk producing tissue. That's what responds to hormones during pregnancy and enlarges the breasts. No milkies, no boobies growing bigger. Mine look just as they did at 12 (and five minutes).
I've been wearing padded bras, silicone enhancers, and - for the last 3 years - mastectomy prosthetics. I'm done with that now.
Today I go to book my surgery with Dr. Koenig in Rochester, NY. Can't wait!
Scheduled for April!
My husband and I spent almost two hours at Dr. Koenig's office. The staff was friendly, the facility impeccable, and Dr. Koenig informative and kind.
I want my breasts to look natural and proportionate. I have very little breast tissue to start, and I'm tall (5'8") with a larger frame & wide chest (15cm breast width). We decided to go with 600cc. I was a little shocked that I would need so large an implant, but the sizers don't lie - the smaller ones looked odd and teeny on me. I'm hoping for a full D cup. April 13 can't come fast enough!
Before pics posted below. Goodbye, tiny five minute boobies!
Made rice sizers
600cc = 2.64 cups of rice. I went with 2 2/3 cups. I think I tied them too tightly and they were very hard. Will redo more loosely bound.
My biggest concern is that my breasts look natural after surgery, and not huge & fake. 600cc seems like so much! And yet I don't want to go too small and think, why bother??
29 days to go!
Time really can't go fast enough for me now. Once I committed I wanted to be in the OR right away! With my husband's schedule and some other things we already had planned there was no way to do it before April 13, so be patient I must. I've read good and bad here, and I must admit that many of the explant stories make he cringe. Then I remember that I've been wearing uncomfortable prosthetics for years and I get excited to throw them away!
A little shopping
Out on a date with hubby, we wandered into V's Secret - a store in which I've never shopped because 36AA does not exist there. I tried on a sports bra with my prosthetics and loved it! I also bought a negligée, the likes of which I haven't worn since our honeymoon. Hubby then floored me by encouraging me to open a charge card! Can't wait until next month! 26 days!
My hubby took the day off to come with me to my pre-op appointment. We're on the way with a list of questions, ready to pay in full and decide on a final size. I made rice sizers in 600, 650, and 700 cc. 700 seems so big when I write the number, but they really balance out the junk in my trunk, you know??
I'm working hard to lose a few more pounds before surgery. It won't make a difference in my results since I've never gained in my breasts when I've gained elsewhere (which chaps my hide, I have to say.) I mean, if I'm going to be overweight I should at least get boobs with the booty, right?? Anyway, I've lost 6 lbs so far and plan to lose 5-6 more in the next 2 weeks.
In a surprising turn of events, I will be getting 650cc high profile implants! I admit I have a bias against them in my mind, because I associate high profile with ginormous porn star boobs. I have a very wide chest (15 cm BWD) and very little tissue, and basically my entire chest will consist of the implants. A flatter implant would just give me a wider, tiny boob look.
They didn't have a 650 HP sizer, so I tried on a 700 moderate plus and Dr Koenig said it would give a similar look in terms of projection. And I forgot to take pictures, oops.
Two weeks from tomorrow!! Yay!!
Tomorrow's the day!
In less than 24 hours I'll finally have some "after" pics to post! I can't wait. Today is the last day with the stupid prosthetics. I'm plotting how I will get rid of them. If we still lived in the wild west I'd shoot them.
Today's the day!
13 Apr 2016
Day of treatment
Leaving the hotel in 15 minutes to head to the Lindsay House surgery center. Can't wait!
Actually, I'm totally nervous. Excited, but swirling around in my head are all of the "what-ifs," like what if I feel like aliens are under my skin, what if I have frankenboob up to my chin and the whole world regards me as a sideshow freak, what if my sutures explode and the implants fall out...
Typing all of that out helped me to feel better, actually. I'm so used to prosthetics over my skin I don't think this will be much different save the skin stretching. Frankenboob is to be expected for a little while, but I'm tall with a long torso and they probably won't reach my chin. And I chose a surgeon known for his lower than average complication rate over all complications. I imagine his suture skills are top-notch.
And now just 10 minutes to go until we leave. Why is it hunger and thirst are never as dire as when you can't eat or drink??
On the other side!
13 Apr 2016
Day of treatment
Everything went smoothly this morning. The staff were very kind. IV in just one stick, yay. I was very surprised to wake up in a lot of pain. I did get very large implants since I started from zero, but dang. I also threw up once, ugh.
My PS just called and is going to give me a muscle relaxer to help.
And here are my first photos without tiny booked!
1st postoperative day
Just saw Dr. Koenig for my first postop. Yesterday was rough. I vomited twice and the pain was bad - and I've had 3 sections, an open hysterectomy, and a broken nose repair. When Dr. Koenig called to check on me my husband asked for a prescription for a muscle relaxer. Once I took that I felt so much better. My pecs unclenched some and I actually slept most of the night. We set an alarm to take more meds and I are some crackers with them.
Today I feel so much better. I'm still sore, but like pulled muscle sore.
I didn't wake up with a surgical bra. He told me to wear what's comfortable, like a sports bra or cami. I'm wearing a Coobie and its very comfy. I bought some exercise tanks at target that have huge, loose arm holes - perfect for right now.
Postop day 2
Pain is better today. No more nausea! I've been able to eat normally for about 24 hours now. Tightness is still intense. I'm down to one muscle relaxer at a time (I was taking two) and I'm doing a trial of stopping the narcotic. Tomorrow I plan to start taking ibuprofen round the clock for a few days.
Since my implants are so big I need my sutures to stay in longer than normal. They're usually removed at one week, but Dr. Koenig said 10 days for me, or maybe 2 weeks. I'm to call the day before my one week appointment and either say I need to come or I think I can wait.
Now that the pain is better I'm starting to enjoy them. I've never filled out a bra or top of any kind on my own. Now a full size Coobie bra is quite full! Yahoo!!
Postop day 3
I slept through the night without setting an alarm to take meds. I was a little afraid to move when I woke up, but it wasn't too bad. I can take ibuprofen today, so I'm trying 800mg instead of narcotics. I'm not a fan of how loopy & sleepy I feel when I take those.
My hubby & I had a little fun at the mall yesterday, trying on a few things. I don't recommend doing it that early - it genuinely hurt to pull bralettes over my head (except the Coobie bras I already had - those are PERFECT). I did try on a dress I would never have been bold enough to try before, at Free People. Holy Booblicious, batman.
Postop day 4
I think they're dropping just a tiny bit. My skin is definitely not as crazy right. My husband said he could see my pores stretching out at the top of my cleavage. Which I have for the first time EVER! Yahoo!
Tightness is better today. I still have a burning sensation at the outer pocket edges (nerves stretching, most likely) - it's not constant, just occasional.
I also realized I'm so pale it's hard to see the actual shape in my pictures. I had a 36DD bra I was wearing with my prosthetics and I'm filling it out. I also stopped into Pink and let them measure me just for giggles (yes I know it's waaaaay to early) and they said 38DD. In other words, they're big.
For other ladies starting with very little tissue, please consider the HP implants. I was afraid of them because I thought they'd look super unnatural. If I had gone with the largest moderate plus implants that would have fit I'd have gotten 1 cm less projection. When starting from zero that makes a difference! I also got 50cc more than I could have with the mod plus (and way more over a low or moderate projection).
Postop day 6
The lower pole is very slowly filling out. I haven't taken any narcotics since day 3, no muscle relaxers since day 4, and I've cut down to 400mg ibuprofen. I still feel tight, like a pulled muscle, and when massaging the crease, lateral sides, and the medial area of my left that's bruised are tender. Still not wearing a bra unless I need to cover the nipples standing at attention.
I think my pictures are deceiving because of my total paleness. The profile shows them best. They are seriously big!
Postop day 10
On postop day 6 I started getting itchy. I didn't think much of it until I ended up waking up repeatedly through the night to scratch the backs of my hands and my lower legs. The next morning I had an angry red rash all over me. I have a variety of allergies, but I'd never had a whole body rash before. I took Benadryl, but by the next day it was worse. I called my surgeon's office and his NP called in a steroid taper for me. I'm still itchy, but better than I was. Best guess is that I have a new allergy to the antibiotic I was prescribed. I'll be seeing an allergist soon to be tested.
Other than the steroid grumpiness and Benadryl haze, I've been doing pretty well. I overdid it today and got super sore. I think I'll be taking a muscle relaxer tonight.
I took a variety of pictures at different angles. They are definitely dropping, though I know I have a way to go.
Better day 10 pics
Had the hubs take a few. Much easier when I don't have to hold the camera! Still frankenboobish, but improving daily. Next update when I see Dr. K on Thursday.
Postop day 16
I saw my PS yesterday for my 2 week appointment. My sutures were removed (usually done at one week, but it was longer for me because of the size of my implants). My skin likes to hold onto sutures, so removal was not fun.
I'm doing well and continuing to drop slowly. My skin was very tight and is taking its sweet time. I am not to wear a bra, or wear only a very soft one with light support (like a Coobie) for at least 3 more weeks. If I'm exercising (going back to gym Monday, legs only) I am to wear a tight sports bra.
I ordered 3 more Coobies for color options (I bought fun colors first and no basics) and some silicone nip covers. I'm nipping out of everything, even sweatshirts!
Going braless was uncomfortable at first because I haven't fully regained sensation, so fabric rubbing my skin was awful. I bought a couple of tanks that are tight with no shelf bra, so they don't wiggle and don't have an elastic band to rub the healing incisions. I wear the Coobies when it would be obvious I'm not wearing a bra, or as a pretty layer under a zip up hoodie (my current outer later of choice).
I see my surgeon again in 3 weeks, at which time I'll be 5 weeks postop.
4 weeks out
Getting more shapely around here! Right is dropping a little more slowly, but that's to be expected as I'm right handed. Wearing a bra is pretty uncomfortable and I only wear a Coobie when I'm wearing a shirt that doesn't conceal the nipplyness very well. I have more sensation back, but I'm still sore & uncomfortable from my nipples down to the incision. Patience, patience, patience!
I saw my PS yesterday and all is well! My scars are still thick, but normal. I still have some numbness/tingling/neuropathy, but normal. The right is slightly higher, but normal (I'm right handed and the difference is small). I return at the 3 month mark.
I've been braless or in a Coobie so far, with a Brilliant Contours bra for working out. I can now go get measured and start wearing underwire if it's not uncomfortable on my scars. He said the shape will change more over time, but not much. They are "dropped" and he's pleased with them. So am I! And my husband enjoys them, too, ha!
I feel like naked pics don't show the size well. I measured myself and I'm still a 36 band (my creases were lowered so it's a different place on my rib cage) and I measure 42 across my breasts. That makes me a 36E or DDD. !!!!!!! I will go for a professional fitting soon and get a second opinion. They don't seem THAT big to me.
I went to a lovely lingerie store today for a bra fitting. If you're anywhere near Buffalo, NY check out Lace & Day in Allentown! It's fantastic. They gave my husband a beer while he was waiting for me, ha!!
Ready for this?
I'm a 36DD or 36E in European sizes!! I tried several brands & styles and sizes varied a bit. I was an F cup in some, a 34 band in others.
High quality bras are not cheap, so I started with just 2. I'll buy a couple more in a few weeks and maybe one a month for awhile. They are SO lovely. A Victoria's Secret bra might last 4-6 months with proper care, but these will last more like 18 months.
I'm so excited to finally have lovely bras and something to put in them!
Pics in next post!
I'm 8 weeks postop today.
3 month update
23 Jul 2016
3 months post
I saw Dr. Koenig for my three month follow up this week. He was very pleased with how they've dropped and I won't go back until a year out. My only concern was the incision line on my right side being slightly above the crease. He didn't think it was bottoming out, but said to watch to make sure it doesn't get higher relative to the crease.
I still have some numb skin, and some neuropathy. It's improving and I hope I'll have full sensation back within a year.
I'm so happy with them! I feel better in all of my clothes and especially in swimsuits. Yay!