Terrified but determined

Hello ladies! I’ll start with my stats: I’m 5’10, currently 200lbs. :(. I’ve gained 10lbs since I decided I was going to really do this. I am scared to death, mostly of dying trying to do something most would consider unnecessary-but to me it is my only option. I have dealt with this belly since I can remember and I’ve wanted a TT for as long. Even at my thinnest, which for me is 175 I still have a gross belly that I have to hide and tuck. So ideally I wish I was 185lbs pre-op and I’ll try my best to get there before D day! Regardless, this is happening no matter what. I’m putting it in God’s hands. I want to feel comfortable in my skin, I want my husband to grab me around my waist without pushing him away, I want to make love to him without a blouse on, I want to wear a regular pair of jeans with a T-shirt instead of a big ol sweatshirt! I want a day to go by where I didn’t think about how unhappy this stomach makes me. Just 1 day.

I wanted to say I am 41yrs old and back in my 20’s I had liposuction of my abs and flanks, and even then the surgeon thought I should get a TT, but I knew I’d have at least 1 baby so that wasn’t an option at that time. The results were great but years and a pregnancy took a toll and now I feel the TT will give me the results I so desperately seek. So here goes nothing! I am nervous and excited and scared all at the same time. Every day all I think of is TT!! I’m counting down the days! I want to Thank all the brave women who share their stories on here, it has been such a blessing to read all your experiences and i felt it necessary to pay it forward! Happy Thanksgivings to all of you! Happy healing, and happy journey to all of us!

So I met with Ellen & Dr. Gutowski today-I feel so good about my choice! They are both so accommodating and helpful. He answered all my questions and we took my pre-op pictures, which for me is like torture! I don’t even let my husband see me naked!! But hopefully after this tummy tuck, i will finally feel comfortable enough to be naked around him-fingers crossed! I am paid in full and 10 days away, it still feels like a dream, I’m anxious as ever but I will remain faithful-it’s in Gods & Dr. G’s hands now;)
The only thing I forgot was to ask about getting photos of the removed skin, I know they can be gory but-I really want to see them and post them on here! I will have to email Ellen about that!