My Reality - Dominican Republic, DO

First I would like to say thank you to all the ladies that were brave enough to post pic of themselves and share their experience the good and the bad. I am 43 haven't had any children but my body looks like this. I am ashamed of how it got to this way but I was only deceiving myself for years in regard to how my body looks. I have always had proportion to my fat so when I was younger I was able to get away with ton of things that age wont allow you too. I have never been a skinny woman and I had a bubble but before everyone was going to get one and they were called nasty and gross lol( Thank you Sir Mix you made me feel a whole lot better). I am not saying I was great but I was able to be an exotic dancer and I was 250lbs yea I know that is big but look at pic I was doing Taebo 5 days a week, working out with a personal trainer and taking the now banned Phen Phen. It was great I had energy to workout twice a day and work two jobs one 9-5 and one 8-3am. So lets fast forward 7 years later a divorce and a pilonidal cyst that kept me down for almost a year. That surgery alone made me feel awful no walking working out just lay on your stomach and I had a wound vac. The itching was horrid and it left scars on my once nice brown round. So, now without the Phen Phen and the energy I am going to try to workout to lose weight before I make a move. Right now I viewed a picture from a company outing and I know I cant go on like this I am usually a confident woman and I have lost a little of her. I have always had younger men approach me and when I am dating I feel like I cant get naked, do certain sexual position (can you say ride lol), or sit on laps without thinking I am hurting them. Which they assure me I am not but its not about them its about how I feel right ladies! So yesterday I weight myself and now I am at 280lbs. Yeah I hate saying it out loud but that is the reality of what if going on and where I am at in my life right now. So may goal is to see what I can do with the dedicated weight loss (smile harder than we say right). I have A- blood and my skin has shown to keloid. With those factors in mind I want to lose weight then go for a tummy tuck and aggressive lipo, and maybe arms and thighs depending on the results I receive from my own hard work. I know I want to go to the DR for the procedures but I am still trying to see who would be best Dr. to sculpt me my new reality. So ladies, dolls all input would be greatly appreciated. I am starting this journey about 6 months out I would like to see my weight loss and try to get the surgery the first of the year. Thank you ladies for reading and this forum for allowing me to get some things off my chest I am scared but I know I want a new me before 45 one that can hopefully wear a bikini and do a splits lol.

There are pics when I was a 250lbs dancer but I workout still hated my stomach. But hey can't keep living in the past. So now all is out as you can see I have work to do. Also if your starting the same journey reach out. This is a big step for me and it would be nice to have a buddy. Also breast lift and arms but until I'm in target range I have to....work work work work when you see me doing work work work lol