395 cc gummy bear, 5'6" 115 lbs, Can't believe I'm doing this!!!

So...I used to be a very natural girl and would have never ever ever ever believed you if you told me I was going to even consider breast augmentation! But, alas, time has a funny way of changing things. I'm 5'6" and 115 lbs when I'm being good. I used to have a full B/small C cup that looked perky and cute. I never minded having a small chest and since I was pretty active/athletic I was thankful I wasn't like my friends who were hauling around big breasts in super strength sports bras. I always said--if I had to pick smaller or bigger I'd pick smaller! That was until I had three beautiful children and breastfed them for a total of 6 years. Not only were my breasts left sad and saggy -small B/more likely A cup but I had varicose veins and an umbilical hernia. Insurance fixed my veins and my hernia. I really didn't care about my breasts other than how annoying it was that they literally fell out of bras when I laid on my side. It was after my divorce that I got to feeling self conscious about showing my naked body to someone new. I met a nice guy who I've been with for several years-we spend the entire summer at the beach and all of our friends are considerably more shapely. I never really minded until I was getting opinions on fixing my hernia and offhandedly asking about breast augmentation while I was there. I teased my boyfriend with the idea--he would have never suggested it, but being one who likes flashy things he thought it was a great idea. I got a few more opinions and finally jumped on the bandwagon when one of my friends got hers done. I went to the same doctor as her and people who she knew but he never felt quite right. His personality was strange and he kept telling me I didn't need it-and when I asked him what I might expect with certain types or cc's he wouldn't give me any suggestions. I realize he didn't want to be held to any certain cup size or outcome--but I needed some idea of what I was looking at. My first visit with him I selected the smallest implant he had. Saline 175 cc's. He only did saline because he said the gel would leak all over your body and then you'd need an MRI and it'd be a mess. I worked my way up to 225 cc's (mentor submuscular) after another visit and with no good help from the surgeon and even had a surgery scheduled when a surge of sickness went through my house finally leaving me with pneumonia (I never get sick!) 5 days before my surgery. I had to reschedule and I felt like that was a sign.
I thought I should just call the whole thing off but then last minute on a night I couldn't sleep worrying over the whole thing I decided to visit a surgeon I had talked to 2 years earlier about fixing my tummy and possible breast aug. I didn't like that he had recommended over 400 cc's for me but liked how competent he seemed. On my most recent visit with him (last Friday) I went in wanting saline implants through my underarm (I was SO freaked out about the scar under the breast that the first surgeon insisted on). This Dr told me he strongly recommended the new cohesive gel/gummy bear implants because they were having such great results with them. Also given my small size and lack of breast tissue rippling would be a bigger concern with saline and since I live in a bikini several months out of the year, that panicked me. He reassured me about the silicone leak issue as well as the fact that it's new in the U.S. (not new in other parts of the world and has a great track record). He took a million measurements and calculated size options that would get me in the B-C range I was looking for. I nearly passed out at the 400 cc ballpark again but he said even though I'm not large, my breast width is at 16cm. He said 200 cc would hardly do anything on my body. The only method of placing this implant well is under the breast so I'm back to that dang scar...which I hate...but I guess it's a trade off. They had one spot available on my date (that I had arranged childcare and my work schedule around) so I took it as a sign and booked with them. I'm feeling a little panicked but I tend to jump in when I finally decide something. I haven't researched these gummy bear implants nearly enough so I'm hoping to find some reassurance--not as many of those out there it seems. Also worried about looking too big and bulky and feeling that way when I work out. I don't want anyone to notice..though at that size I know they will...sigh. My boyfriend says no point in doing it if you can't tell...but I just want boobs that don't disappear when I lay down or form weird shapes when I lean forward. Did I say I selected 395 cc? Cohesive gel-mentor.
Any thoughts/advice/reassurance?
I have surgery on a Thursday and am call for work starting the following Monday. They said I should be fine (I can avoid lifting but I do have to lift my arms up to about my shoulder height to do my job) but from the stories I've read people don't seem to be feeling that great so soon. I have some hard hitting drugs that I've never taken prescribed to me and that has me a touch worried...
Okay..this is such a ramble! Sorry...will be more organized next post-maybe..just laying my stream of thoughts out there. Thanks for reading and for any advice/thoughts you have to share!! I'll try to post some pics from my phone. Feels weird!

Ummmm... I'm not good at taking before selfies apparently. Will have my boyfriend get some better ones before my actual surgery.

Holy cow--finally finished filling my scrips. Seems like an awful lot of drugs! I am not a big fan of how I feel on them so hoping I don't need them-haven't taken any of them before so a little nervous about side effects. I am taking an antibiotic (Bactum) for 30 days! Anyone else do that? Oxycodone (percocet) and Diazepam (valium). Emend for nausea ahead of time (that one pill almost cost me $100!--it better work!) and Celebrex.
Seems like a lot to manage....
Also reading about stool softners and arnica on here...not sure if I should jump on that wagon...??
And also doubting this very large seeming size (395cc--I initially had selected around 200cc) I ordered it and it's done so I'm just trying to remind myself to trust the Dr.
On a good note--I got my house all cleaned-so that's exciting!
Okay..enough stalking realself--way past my bedtime!!