Silicone Gel Breast Implants Removed After Only A Year. With A Lift & Aerola Reduction. Im Devastated. Columbus, OH

After getting 575cc silicone gel implants. 6 months later my left breast was swelling and getting hard I was on AMOX-CLAV 875 -125mg antibiotics for serveral months till the removal because the pain, fever, swelling would all come back if I didnt take them the infection would come back fast.. it also looked misshaped or misplaced. It started sitting higher up than my right implant. So it was all lopsided and I had to wear a bra and stuff it. I couldnt believe I paid so much money for this to happen! The swelling would spread up into my neck and lymph nodes and into my shoulder. I felt like I would die without the antibiotics. And noone would tell me anything. It never got rid of whatever was wrong it just let me survive till I could get the money for the removal, lift and aerola reduction. I had saggy breasts before implants from breast feeding and kids. He also said I might have tissue damage or something but they never explained anything most of the time. So I was sure I would need extra work after the removal because my implants were also pretty big. And when I went in for surgery the nurses getting me ready for the removal and lift were looking at my paperwork and saw that I was on that type of antibiotics for that long was shocked. Then I was never told what was wrong with my left breast implant. I wanted to take my implants home after the removal but the lady told me no..when I woke up after the surgery and asked for the implants even though I bought and paid for them they would not give them to me. I couldnt believe it! I walked out with them inside my chest the the first surgery I had!? So now after the removal my boobs feel like a freaking B cup. My original natural size was a C/D cup. Also when I look down at them they just look so werid they have like ripples and dents in different angles its gross. I was happy with my implants till it all went downhill. I loved having big boobs till I had infection or whatever the hell was wrong since no one really specified. How unprofessional is that? I was just a big shitty unwanted problem. I look like I have little girl boobs now. Biggest mistake of my life! It has taken my life away. Ive lost almost everything because of this. I also could have just removed the left implant and get it replaced but I would have had to walk around with just one implant in for 6 months to a year. And I would have the risk of it just happening all over again. So I said just [RS bleep] it. Take them out Im done. Now I feel so flat chested.. I just want to die. Sorry Im an emotional wreck and I know Im a stupid person for saying all this Im just so low right now. There was times I wouldnt take my antibiotics before the removal so the infection would spread I wanted it to get into my bloodstream so I would die so maybe they would understand and see what kind of pain I was in. That I wasnt lying or making it all up. I felt like it was so unfair. I worked so hard to achieve the perfect chest I always wanted & now just a year later they had to come out. Just to look even worse than before. Also I had to prove that I had a fever before he would even prescribe me the antibiotics. I went to ER twice to get antibiotics and got documented proof of having a fever. I was treated like it was all in my head. Im devastated. You might being reading this and thinking oh my shes just over reacting but if u had went thru what I went thru you would be feeling the same way.. I always had low self esteem and now I have zero!! Im so ashamed. Im so upset. I CANT STAND LOOKING IN THE MIRROR. Ive been crying non stop ????????????