52 and Hate Looking in the Mirror....Chester, NJ

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So I just put my deposit down and booked the date...

So I just put my deposit down and booked the date for my surgery. I have been contemplating a facelift seriously for the last year. I was holding up pretty well I thought but once I turned 50 my face took on some serious signs of aging. I had four in person consultations with plastic surgeons in my area and one phone consult with a Dr. in Mexico. While Mexico was tempting because of the price I just couldn't take that route. I chose Dr. Larry Weinstein mostly due to his pleasant personality and of course his credentials. I feel I will be in good hands. I will be having a face/ neck lift , brow lift, lower lid bleph and a TCA peel. I am a mixture of excited, nervous, guilty for spending that kind of money on myself. I am so grateful to the many brave woman who have shared the stories on here and I hope by sharing mine I will help others take the leap!

Two months away!

I'm still moving forward still having mixed emotions. Nervous, excited, guilty about spending money I really shouldn't be, but I am still committed to having the work done! I really hope it will help with my confidence about my looks. I have always been insecure with my looks but now since I turned 50 it has gotten almost paralyzing. I have met with my PS several times since booking the surgery, he is very understanding of my concerns and makes me feel confident that I will have the results I am expecting! Let just say for the amt. of $ it's costing I am expecting a significant change! I don't want to look just "rested" I want to look at least 7 years younger!!! Thanks to all the ladies who have shared your journey here on real self it has been a tremendous help.

One more pic

3 weeks till surgery......

Oh my Gosh! Am I really going to have plastic surgery on my face?... Wow the closer it gets the more nervous I become. Will I get the results I'm hoping for or will I be tremendously disappointed... Will I look worse then i feel I do now? So many what ifs.. What if I don't wake up from anesthesia??? OMG that would really suck... I am divorced with no significant other. I have two boys 20 and 17 that live with me full time. When I first told them what I was planning they were horrified and not supportive at all, they have slowly come around and have accepted that this is going to happen whether they approve or not. I'm wondering now if I might skip the brow lift and just do face/ neck lift and lower bleph. I'm also having chemical peel and laser. My upper eyes aren't too bad and the people I've told have said they don't think I need a brow lift and I am very afraid of hair loss
and or raised hairline... Anyhow any thoughts comments from all you lovely ladies and a few gents would be appreciated!

Less then 2 weeks till surgery!!!

So yesterday I had my final visit with my P.S. before the day of surgery he spent quite a bit of time going over the procedures that will be done and what can be expected. I have decided to not do a full brow lift and just a lateral brow lift. I'm really excited and I really do have such high expectations that I hope I'm not going to be let down... I think I have prepared myself for the recovery process thanks to all the ladies who have shared their experiences here on RealSelf. I know it's not going to be a walk in the park and I'm not going to be a pretty sight at first but hopefully in the end I will be happy with the results!!!

One week and counting....

I can't believe my surgery is just one week and one day away.... Very excited and very scared at the same time.....

More pics....

Uh oh.....

So I woke up yesterday feeling very unsettled. My stomach was in knots. I attributed the feeling to being nervous about my surgery on Tuesday. I couldn't eat, I cancelled plans I had on the evening, but was able to do house cleaning and run errands. Well by 10:00 pm I was violently ill! It was coming from both ends and since I hadn't eaten or drank really all day I became dehydrated to the point that a trip to the hospital E.R. to get an iv of fluids and anti nausea medicine. The dr. Seems to think it was a gastro intestinal virus. I'm feeling better today, my stomach has settled down but I am wondering if this will affect my surgery? The paperwork I got from my P.S. says to let them know of any upper respiratory illness before surgery but says nothing of stomach bug. I will call his office on Monday and see what they say... Fingers crossed that I can keep my date because I have arranged everything around that date!!!!

Surgery postponed.....

Surgery has been postponed till this Friday due to me coming down with stomach bug and not feeling completely better. Dr. Thinks it's best to give my body a few more days of rest... I'm disapointed but totally understand.

It's a go for tomorrow!!

Hi all! I'm feeling much better today so the surgery is a go for tomorrow!! I am excited/nervous. Very anxious to get into the recovery stages and hoping all goes well. I will post as soon as I am able. Thank you to all the ladies on here who have shared their own experiences without them I would not have had any point of reference. Here are photos taken this A.M. Sans makeup.... Hoping for the best results possible!!!!

All ready for going out after.....

First day after

Hello all, well I made it through the procedure! Everything went well...at the moment I am having my son write this for me because my eyes are practically swollen shut. I have extreme amount of swelling and the head wrap feels as though it is strangling me. I am sleeping most of the day. On a scale of 1-10 I will my comfort level at a 6 so all in all its not bad. I will write more when I am able.

I can finally see! (Sort of)

Had surgery Friday so I guess I'm 4 days into recovery. It is not a walk in the park at all but thanks to all the woman on here who went before me I pretty much knew it would not be easy. What I wasn't expecting was to be so swollen!!! My eyes were completely shut for two days I couldn't see anything. My lips look bigger then Lisa Rinnas I mean wow they are huge. Today I woke up and my eyes can open slightly so I can see again!!! Yay!! I also am having a problem eating nothing appeals to me and it's difficult to put anything in my mouth due to the swelling. Thank God for my boys they have been an amazing help to me I would never get through this without them and believe me they were opposed to me having this surgery but they finally came around after I kept talking about it for two years!!! That's all for now I will post more soon.

P.S.

I forgot to mention on Saturday I was quite concerned about the amount of swelling I had so I called Dr. Weinstein who was reassuring and was on his way into New York but would swing by my home just to have a look!!! So he did! Left his poor wife in the car while he tended to me!! Now that's a great Dr.!!!! Totally impressed me!!!

Day 4 post op

Today I awoke feeling pretty good! I had my first decent nights sleep. I went to PS yesterday and he said everything was coming along as expected. He insisted I take a shower and wash my hair when I got home which believe me was the LAST thing I wanted to do! I havent been able to eat much due to the swelling and my stomach not feeling quite right. And remember I had a nasty stomach virus days before surgery so I was feeling quite weak and the thought of standing in the shower and washing all the crap out of my hair was daunting!!! My sister came home with me to sit in the bathroom while I attempted to clean up, I did the best I could do but it wasnt very good, my hair was a mess. I vowed I would give it another try today hopefully I would be feeling stronger. I was so I did and it was a success!!! Overall today feeling good still going to take it easy maybe do a couple of things around the house but still mostly rest. I'm posting a photo from this morning after my shower I'm finally seeing much of the swelling diminish.....

More pics....

Someone wanted more pics this is the best I can give you up till now.. Trust me these are not easy to share but we have a sisterhood on here...

Day 5 post op....

Saw PS again today. He removed some stitches I have to admit the ones under my eyes hurt a lot when he was removing them. I'm feeling same as yesterday, pretty good overall. Swelling still better but it is a bit uncomfortable especially my neck area. Ears are sore as well as sides of my head where the incisions are for lateral brow lift. The laser and chemical peel effects are still very visible and looking forward for that to be over. I am adding a few pics from today just to give you an idea where I am at. I've also decided to commit to gaining 10-15 lbs in 6 months because as we age being too thin is not a good look for our faces. I'm 5'6" 110 lbs and think 125-130 would be a better healthier look!

Day 6 post op....

Not much different today. Still feeling pretty good. Lots of peeling and spots still from the laser and peel. Looking forward to being able to put moisturizer on my face and makeup eventually! PS says nothing but Bacitracin on the face till healed. Attaching a couple pics from today but really no change that I can see.

Day 9 post op...

Hi all.... Still feeling really good no major complaints.... The ears are tender and sore but overall I feel lucky that the process has not been that awful. I'd say the redness and blotchiness and itching from the peel and laser have been the most difficult to deal with. I was fortunate not to have had any bruising, which I'm amazed by because I typically bruise so easily. I am posting a few pics from today. I have two girlfriends coming over for a visit so I did my best to look as presentable as possible. This is the first day I have put some makeup on since surgery. I find myself scrutinizing every inch of my face and thinking I see the old wrinkles coming back or my lower face dropping... Ugh we are our own worse critics.... Happy Valentines Day!!!!

Going shopping!!!

Do you think anyone can tell????

13 days post op....

Hi all!! Heading out to the PS this morning. Still feeling really good. I have some numbness and tingling around my ears and still redness around my mouth area from the TCA peel. Posting some pics from this morning still not able to wear makeup per Dr. But hoping he gives me the go ahead today since I'm scheduled to head back to work on Monday!! Also have a giant urge to cut and color my hair drastically!!! Oh and I seem to be losing more hair then normal after I wash it and comb through it... Was wondering if anyone else had experienced this!???

13 days post op b4 n after pic

Ok so here is an almost identical pose no makeup in either pic.... B4 n after what do you think???

Day 15 post op....

Well it's day 15 Saturday and I'm getting ready to go to a double feature at the movie theater with a male friend. I've put on some makeup and am anxious to see what he thinks. He knew I was having work done and has seen some pics of the recovery but today will be the first day he sees me in person. I for sure am my worse critic and every morning I wake up and think my face is falling and it's going to go back to what it was before surgery. I think about all the money I spent and I need to be happy with the results!!! I need some positive vibes sent my way and some reassurance that it's not going to go back to pre surgery face... My boys are getting tired of me asking them "how's it look" "does it look better" do I look younger"? Lol poor kids... Can anyone understand how I feel??

A few more pics....

Now I'm obsessing over my hair!!! I can't do anything with it!!! I want a drastic hair cut and want to go blonde but PS says no to coloring hair yet.... Will I ever be happy and satisfied?? Or will I always find fault with my appearance??? Ugh it's one of those days ladies!!

Feeling down.....

Hi all,
I'm having a bad day. I swear I see my old face coming back every day!! I'm feeling sick about all the money I spent all for nothing??!! I have to go back to work tomorrow and I'm sure it's adding to my anxiety. Most the woman I work closely with know what I was having done and in hindsight I wish i had never told them. I'm assuming they are going to be scrutinizing my face and not seeing any changes... Am I crazy or have others felt the way I'm feeling??? Could it be my mind playing tricks on me???? Vanity. It is my sin. Do I not have value other then my appearance??? Ugh. I suppose having an ex husband leave me for a 19 year old when I was 41 and then a more recent lover now with a 25 year old has made me feel and look older then I really was.... Sorry for the rant but it's just one of those days.....

Day 18....

First day back to work and it's going well. All the people who knew thought I looked amazing and the big boss pulled me into her office to tell me how wonderful I looked and I looked years younger!!!! Wow that really helped because she is my age and plastic surgery is definitely not something she would ever consider for herself. I wasn't even going to tell her but on my last day at work she must have heard some buzzing in the office so she asked me what were my plans for "vacation". That's when I told her and waited for oh no don't that's crazy, but to my surprise she was supportive. She's amazing actually! There are some people who look a little extra long at me I know their thinking somethings different but can't quite put their finger on it!!! It's great to get the compliments now I need to believe it myself and hold my head up high and say damn I look good everyday in the mirror when I awake..... I'll share a couple of photos I took at work. And a couple not so flattering ones from b4 facelift...

Day 20 post op....

Hi! Just a short update on day 20 to say I'm feeling great, getting lots of compliments. My ears are still a bit sore and tender but I'm able to wear earrings without any discomfort and that wasn't true 2 days ago. Love to you all and we ladies are among the bravest!!! This is not an easy thing to do and your emotions will be all over the place. I'm still stunned that I actually went through with it and am so happy I did!!!!

Day 20

3 weeks post op!!!

Wow!!! I can hardly believe it's been three whole weeks since my lift. Time flies. One thing i haven't mentioned is I have a spot behind my left ear where the skin died and it's an open wound that I have to clean twice a day and keep bacitracin on it. I have been to the Dr. Several times since surgery so he could monitor it and he doesn't seem concerned and says it should heal on its own in a few weeks. My ears really hurt today and when I was cleaning it I saw blood on the cloth. I have a really weak stomach and just the thought of an open hole there is making me feel sick... Anyhow I will post a pic and see if any of you ladies have experienced anything similar???? Also was having fun playing around and taking some fun selfies and one that I photoshopped a new hairdo and color and changed the makeup... It's an app called youcam makeup...I will post these pics too. If your bored download the app and have some fun!!!!!

Ugh!!!

Ladies, I think I've become even more obsessed over my face then I ever have been!!! Or I'm going crazy, or I just can't be happy..... Each day I wake up expecting the old face to have returned and I swear every day I see more lines reappearing and my lower face drooping!!! I am driving my friends crazy also... Has anyone else ever felt or thought this??? It's just so much money for it to have been wasted??? Maybe I looked better before because there was still some swelling???? Idk but I'll post a couple pics from today smiling not smiling bright light not so bright... Maybe you can verify that I am seeing the old face return or maybe u can reassure me that it's holding up???? I'm so worried.... Yet I wish I didn't put so much value on my looks....

1 month post op....

With a mix of emotions I am posting two pics I took this am on drive to work. I have no makeup on just because I wanted to give my skin a break... Only some light lip gloss. I think it's not bad for 52...

Before and after from PS...

Went to Dr. Today and they gave me my before and afters so I thought I would share with all you wonderful ladies.....

Just thinking.....

So I definitely believe this surgery has given me confidence that I haven't had in a long time. Yes, it's sad that all my self worth was mostly tied into my appearance and I am working on knowing there is so much more to me then my outside self. We can't deny however that woman become somewhat invisible around 50 I've noticed a big change in the way I am treated by men and woman before the facelift and now since the compliments are coming like they used to and it feels good I can't lie... I haven't really dated since my divorce jeez almost ten years ago.... For a couple of reasons first because I had young boys and they were my priority and I didn't want anything or anyone to disrupt what we had going on.... Now they are grown and I want to find someone special and thanks in part to my facial rejuvenation I feel confident enough to start looking... I'm going to join one of those dating sites and see what happens... I think it's time!!!! Wish me luck lovely ladies!!!

One more....

6 1/2 weeks post....

Hi all,
It's 6 1/2 weeks since surgery and I'm feeling great physically... Mentally has been a bit of a roller coaster... I can't help but think my old face is back!! I had about a month of being really happy with the results to now just seeing all the flaws again... I need to relax I know... I'm doing nothing but making myself crazy... Vanity is a curse... As the feeling of tightness around my face and swelling is nearly all gone I don't see much of a change.... My friends tell me
It's in my head because I have always been critical of my looks. Maybe I'm just getting used to the new face and I'm being to hard on myself.... I'm going to try posting
Every month or so for the next year as a follow up.... Hope everyone is well...

I don't want to be a Debbie downer I swear....

Hi beautiful ladies!!! First off
I can't thank all of you who have taken the time to offer words of encouragement and for helping me understand that I am not alone and most of my feelings are par for the course.. You will never know how grateful I am for your support!!! Now having said that, I really don't like what I'm seeing... Every day it feels less tight and
It shows! I am going to address these feelings with my PS on Monday at my next appt. I didn't realize after spending 17,500. I would still need fillers and Botox I went for the lift to avoid dumping
Thousands of dollars on fillers that don't last because I thought the lift would last at
Least 5 years!!!! I am attaching
A couple photos taken today similar to my horrid b4 pics to see what u all think.... Am I crazy or should I ask my PS about revision???? I want to be
Happy I promise I do!!! But I know
What I see'!!!

2 months post...

Just a quick update to thank all of you beautiful ladies for all the support and positive feedback you have offered me. I am starting to embrace the "new" me and even though I still am slightly disappointed in how my lower face seems too lax and I will have my PS tweak this after the six month mark when most say that's the bench mark for the final result. But I have started to relax and enjoy life. Had a work party last night and I had a blast and I actually liked how I looked!!! Yay!!! Good luck with all your continued healing and or upcoming surgery!!! Love you all!!! Xoxo... We are very very brave!!!

Almost 3 months post....

Well I can finally say I am totally accepting the new me and loving and appreciating the changes. Yes it is true the changes are more subtle then I would have liked. No I don't want to look fake or plastic but I do wish I was a bit tighter... Overall very satisfied and I will be adding fillers and Botox in the near future. Thanks to all you ladies who have helped me get thru the rough patches and have helped keep me thinking positively when I was going down a negative road.... Love to all my "sistas" on real self!!!

4 months and one week post...

Hello ladies!! It's been a while since I've checked in and just wanted to give an update... I'm still happy that I went through with the surgery but if I'm being completely honest I'm not thrilled with the total result based on the money that I spent,,. For the amount of money I was looking for some dramatic results... I have since had Botox and fillers which cost another fortune just to try to get the results I was hoping for... I feel once the swelling goes down the face seems to start sliding down and the wrinkles start reappearing! Overall I have no regrets just wish it didn't cost so much!!! I'm keeping busy getting ready to move to South Carolina next month!!! Excited and nervous since my boys will be staying in Jersey with their Dad until hopefully they decide to follow me... Hope everyone is doing well and I am including some pics... Xoxo

6 months post op....

Hi everyone.... I just wanted to post a 6 month update... I have been extremely busy with work and I moved from NJ to SC so I haven't been on here in s long time but that's not to say I haven't been thinking and scrutinizing about the results of my lift.... I am posting a pic taken in the last month in daylight and a pic of me soon after my surgery... I have to say I am a bit disappointed that I'm not as tight as I would have liked to have been... I feel that the lines around my eyes and smile have all reappeared maybe not quite as bad as they were but close enough... If this surgery wasn't as expensive as it was o might b less critical but for the amount of money spent I was hoping for a more youthful less wrinkled look... Like the ladies in their late 50's on the Real Housewives or Christy Brinkley... How do they stay so youthful looking??? It can't be natural??? Anyway it is what it is and I'm
Living life staying positive but wanted to share my thoughts after 6 months... I will be back at the year mark to check in... Love to all!!!

8 month update...

Here's a pic from this A.M..... I have good days and bad days. Good days I can see the improvements and on bad days I feel like I just threw 17,000... Down the drain....

One Year Follow up!!

Hi All!! Wow can hardly believe it will be one full year since my surgery on Feb.6th. I thought it would be helpful to share some
pictures of me one year after. I tried to duplicate some of
My b4 pics with no makeup and just normal. I also included a couple of me all done up. Also I have not had any fillers or
Botox since September. I would love to every three months but it's just not in my budget. Maybe I will treat myself once a year! Overall I am quite happy with my results. Did i look better with some
Swelling in the early days? Yes I think so but still in all I think I look better and less tired then before! I would do it all over again, and in 5 years or so I just might!!! Hope everyone is doing well and I hope sharing my journey has helped some of Y'all!

Very qualified and very personable.

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