Hi everyone! I am finally ready to start blogging....
Hi everyone! I am finally ready to start blogging. I've been holding off but now this is getting real, so here goes:
I'm getting the Fat Transfer done because I've always felt that my body was not in proportion. I chose the fat transfer because I like the idea of it being my own fat tissue versus a foreign body.
I like pretty much everything about my figure other than my breasts and the sides of my hips and inner thighs. I think full breasts are so beautiful and I always admire it. I have a few Victoria's Secret bras and I'm fitting snugly into a 32 C push-up, but I am not sure that's accurate. Dr. Bednar says I'm more along the lines of a B cup, but I do have one or two A cup bras that are uncomfortably spacious.
I chose Dr. Bednar based on all the great reviews. I submitted my information for the consultation about three months ago and Sylvia, the patient coordinator, called me the next day! She's very responsive and helpful. When I talked to Dr. Bednar, he told me to expect an increase of 1.5 - 2 cup sizes, which is terrific. I definitely don't want my breasts to look fake. I just want a nice, supple full C cup -- maybe a small D.
I'm excited to be getting this procedure done, but I am also extremely nervous. I don't know if this has to do with anything but I am mixed race: Black, Chinese. I read another blogger say asians have great retention? If so, *fingers crossed*
Anyway, I think that's all for now. Happy Saturday!
Surgery in 3 Days
My nerves are really getting to me now. I keep thinking about worst case scenarios. I was reading through a couple of other blogs today, and oh my gosh are there some horror stories! I keep telling myself that I've made the best decision I could make in terms of selecting a doctor for this procedure, so that's helping me out with the stress and anxiety. I've also been re-reading Dr. Bednar's blogs and everyone looks terrific, so that helps too.
I started taking the bromelain with quercetin today, but I missed a dose due to being in meetings all day. I think I almost have everything purchased and packed. I have all of my prescriptions filled except for the Norco and Valium. Does everyone get prescribed valium? I'm wondering if I have it because I have moderate anxiety.
I keep going back and forth between checking a bag and just bringing a carry-on, but I think I'm just going to go ahead and check a bag. I bought this really cute sweatshirt dress from amazon. It arrives tomorrow so I'm happy to have a loose fitting comfortable dress that I can wear.
My mom is accompanying me. She is definitely not thrilled about this, but she is maintaining her support for me. She is even more on edge because we almost lost my grandmother this summer due to a botched knee replacement surgery, but I keep reassuring her that Dr. Bednar has a really solid track record as far as I know and have researched.
My boyfriend is also really supportive. When I initially told him about this, he was really devastated because he thought I wanted it to "please him", but when I explained how I've felt about my body for years now, he understood. He thinks I look perfect as I am, but he will be there for me throughout the healing process when I return home from Charlotte.
That's all for now. I think I'll post a short update everyday for the next week or so.
TL;DR: Saw some scary blogs and I am really anxious. Started taking supplements, got everything packed. Mom is scared but supportive. Boyfriend supportive. Going to update everyday for a week or so.
Just landed in Charlotte
Hi Ladies! I literally just touched down at the Charlotte airport. I'll be headed to check in at the hotel soon, and then to my 3pm pre-op appointment! I'll write another post after the pre-op.
I wanted to show you the sweatshirt dress I got from Amazon. It's a one piece with a hood. It's very comfortable so I'm looking forward to lounging around in this after surgery.
Met Dr. Bednar, Sylvia & Sou today. First off, they are great and very helpful. Sou was my saving grace today. This is how the appointment went down:
I got to the office. The office is nice, clean, & has friendly atmosphere. Dr. Bednar's artwork is on display and they are quite beautiful. It was also reassuring to me to be seeing someone whose level of skill and talent is displayed via different mediums.
Sou took me back to one of the consultation rooms. I changed into the gown and shortly after Dr. Bednar came back. He took my blood pressure & listened to my heart and lungs. He looked at my body, touched breast, touched thighs and back area. He told me that he will take from the side of my hips, the back of my thighs, front thighs & flanks. He said worst case he might take from the little bit of fat I have on my tummy.
After that, Sou took me to a different room where she took my blood pressure and checked my iron levels. Then came the daunting part... She handed me a clipboard with a stack of papers to read through. I signed like 20 pages of explanations of what could potentially go wrong, death included. That was really nerve-racking and I started having extreme second thoughts. I wanted to run out of there and never come back, but I listened to Sou's explanations of why we have to sign that paperwork, and she told me that they've never had any major complications happen. I just don't want to be that one person where something goes terribly wrong, ya' know?
After that, Sou made a copy of the packet and gave me a new folder with the same information we receive in the pre-op package. Then, she had me put on those disposable panties and go back into the first room for 360 photos. That was the coolest part! I got to see the digital rendition of my body.
Afterwards, I got dressed and met Sylvia at the front desk to pay the remainder of my balance. Then, we were finished.
My mom and I stopped at a nearby walgreens to get my prescriptions filled and now we are back in the hotel relaxing. There's a shopping mall and a movie theatre nearby so we might head out for a couple hours before retiring for the evening.
I'm still pretty nervous about this, and praying that all goes well. Honestly, my biggest fear is recovery and the flight home. I'm not in love with flying and I am usually a pretty anxious flyer. I'm just hoping that the pain I might be feeling coupled with the flight anxiety doesn't send me over the edge.
Anyway, I'm rambling so... goodnight. Until tomorrow...
I made it to the other side! Yay! However, I'm in tons of pain. Here's my story:
11 PM - 4 AM the night before ... I couldn't sleep at all. I was tossing and turning, freaking out about the procedure. I finally slept from like 5 AM - 6:30 AM.
8:00 AM - Yesterday I arrived at Dr. Bednar's office via shuttle from the hotel. I met Kendall, one of the nurses, and she took me back get me undressed and set up with IV and fluids. I warned her that I was a hard stick, and unfortunately the first IV did not take. My vein blew and swelled up. It wasn't her fault, it's just my veins are super small. So the nurse anesthetist got me going on the IV. I forgot his name, but I think he's a fairly new member of Dr. Bednar's team. He's a cutie, but then again, all of the nurses are pretty much hot. He did a great job of calming my nerves because I was so anxious. My heart was pounding and I was shaky.
8:30 AM - Around this time I had gone through half the IV bag, which consisted of electrolytes, glucose and water to get my system hydrated since I hadn't had anything to eat or drink since midnight. Kendall returned to the room with an anti nausea medicine and 1 Percocet pill. I took those with a tiny cup of water.
9:00 AM - Dr. Bednar came in to the room and marked me. After that, I said goodbye to mom and they took me to the operating room. I can't really recall how the room looked because they took my glasses off, but I do remember it being small. I got on the table and the CRNA told me he was about to give me some happy drugs.
12:45 PM -- I started to coming to in recovery. I don't remember much after that other than somehow getting back to the hotel.
I was in pretty bad pain all day and night. I didn't take my hydrocodone because last time I took it for a wisdom tooth extraction, I got so dizzy and fell. I was afraid to take it so I took extra strength tylenol. Unfortunately, that did not work and so I was in horrible pain all night until finally I decided that I'd rather take the Norco and risk the dizziness vs being in pain.
5 AM today - Took half a tab of Norco and wow, even that helped, so after I ate breakfast I took a whole pill. I'm feeling so much better now. The pain is actually tolerable and feels more like a burning sensation.
I removed the bandages around my breasts today. It's not cute at the moment. They look like big flat pancakes. I'll try to post photos after my first shower on Monday.
I'm doing alright. I'm walking a bit, but mostly resting. That's all for now.
Flew home very early this morning. I feel ok but experiencing some sharp pains in my right breast which is slightly bigger than my left one. Doctor put 625ccs in each breast. He only took from flanks and back of thighs. Will post pics later when my BF can take them. Right. Ow my nipples are inverted so I'm really hoping they pop back out soon.
Photos & Update
Here are some pics. BF and I got into an argument so I will try to get additional photos when my mom can help me get out of this garment.
Today makes Day 4 and I am feeling a little bit better than yesterday. No bowel movement yet, sadly. My back burns like hell whenever I get up or sit down.
Bruising is minimal in appearance but it is definitely there under the skin. I didn't really swell much or have much drainage. Maybe that's the little gift I get for having tiny veins that blow up on nurses.
When I took the bandages off Sunday night, there was hardly any blood or fluid at every site. I guess that's ok. My breasts seemed to have stopped bleeding from the pressure holes as of yesterday.
Walking is better but too much walking causes fatigue and dizziness. I'm going to try to get out today and do a little grocery shopping.
I like how big my boobs are right now, but for me it's like a fantasy I can live out for a few weeks before they get down to a reasonable size for me. I am petite and I am not sure huge boobs like this are right for me, but I have to keep in mind that they are still swollen and everyday they are dropping & softening more.
I weighed in at 133 lbs, no weight change.
Shaking my head...
Well, it happened to me too, ladies... you know, the sudden disappointment and depression that seems to happen to so many of us after treating ourself to cosmetic surgery? I would read other ladies' blogs on here and always think to myself that I don't think I'll get depressed about it, but I did.
All day yesterday I was basically feeling so down on myself and like I made the worst decision ever. I started freaking out about my co-workers possibly noticing and I just felt bad.
Well I woke up today feeling much better. I don't know where the onset of those feelings came from but it was bad. I'm really glad to be feeling better today.
Almost two weeks!
I'll post pictures this weekend but I wanted to write an update:
Gosh. So the pain is tolerable but not still not great. My thighs are bruised and sore on the back and side. Every time I get up and sit down, it's momentarily excruciating. Sitting on the toilet really sucks. My back is still swollen so the arch I have is gone for now. Every day is gradually better. Ibuprofen helps as does icing. I have a lump in lower back area but I'm not concerned about it right now. I'm just ready to start feeling better.
Firstly, my nipples are still inverted and this is very uncomfortable. My breasts are still swollen and have not dropped much at all. They look the same size. I have found one lump in my right breast at the top. I haven't squeezed it, but I can feel it there when I wash. My breasts are very heavy. I am not used to carrying this much weight on the front so it has caused a lot of tension in my shoulders and neck. I can't wait for them to drop down. They look like implants right now.
The incisions are really ugly right now. The best looking one is the one on my back, but who sees that? I'm more concerned about the breast incisions. I've started applying the scar cream twice a day. I'll switch over to the scar sheets once my scabs fall off. Some of the stitches were sticking out. I cut most of them down as best I could, but they are still protruding a little bit.
Sleeping sucks right now because I am not a back sleeper. I'm getting through it, but I cannot wait to be able to sleep on my side again.
I was on a corticosteroid for the inflammation and weaning has been rough. At first I had 'roid rage for like two days. I feel bad for my BF and mom. They really got the short end of the stick. But now, I'm suffering from withdrawal migraines. These suck and I'll be glad when I'm feeling better.
Still taking my clinical support twice daily. The vitamins really help. Once I'm done with these, I will switch to a women's multivitamin that includes vitamin E.
The pain killers really threw off my digestive system. I'm still pretty constipated, but it's getting better. Still taking Colace and eating Activia. Eating normally. My appetite has almost come back.
The general anesthesia caused me to be 3 days late on my period, so don't get freaked out if you don't get your period right away.
Had sex with boyfriend exactly 7 days after surgery. It was slow and deliberate, but enjoyable which was surprising because I thought I'd be in pain. No boob touching.
Back at work today. I wore all black, but so far it doesn't seem like anyway has noticed anything other than me seeming a little under the weather. I still haven't gotten all my energy back yet, so I've just told them that I'm recovering from having the Flu.
I rarely drink but I am sad about not being able to drink for my bf's birthday, Halloween, Thanksgiving, my birthday, Christmas & New Year's Eve (in that order). Otherwise, I have been feeling well. My biggest issue is that I think my boobs are too big right now and am hoping they shrink down soon. I will be ok with losing 20% of what I currently have because my boobs are gigantic on my tiny torso currently. I feel like I look ridiculous.
Anyway, that's all for now. Pictures coming this weekend. Enjoy your week, ladies!
2-Week Post Photo
Snapped a photo really quick last night. I'm officially wearing Spanx! Honestly, if it weren't for the zippers on the side of the compression garment, I would have stayed in it because the Spanx I'm wearing right now is so tight that it hurts pulling them over my thighs.
My breasts are heavy and more jiggly. They look the same to me, just lower. The jiggles are uncomfortable in the wrong bra. I'm now mostly wearing the bra Dr. Bednar's office sent. It offers great support.
My boobs are much softer. Nipples still inverted, but starting to peek out a little bit more everyday. The lumps I felt in my breasts a few days ago seem to be gone or they shifted down more. I'm not squeezing my breasts at all so I'm not quite sure how lumpy they are, if at all.
Can start putting warm compresses on any lumps that might occur and I can start rolling my lipo areas. :)
More pictures tomorrow or Sunday.
Photos + update
Each day is better and so far I am really happy with results.
The compression garment is a pain in the butt even though it serves a purpose. Showering with it on was a nightmare for me. I hated switching from the wet one to the dry one. It was painful to put on every time up until about a day ago. Having my period with it on was unfortunate. Although I used tampons, it was still a hassle trying to clean up at work in one of the bathroom stalls. As far as cleaning the garment, I put mine in the wash on the hand wash cycle and I dried them in the dryer.
I think some swelling has gone down. They have also dropped a tiny bit more, but not much. I don't think they will drop a whole lot. Other girls on here who haven't had kids don't seem to have a lot of "droppage." I am starting to like them more but it is hard to love them right now when they hurt and my nipples are inverted. The inverted nipple situation is quite uncomfortable. It is a constant burning sensation. It makes me feel like I have heartburn. I'm hoping they pop out soon. I don't know about any lumps. Since they dropped a little, I can't feel the lump I felt last week.
The lumps and bumps are starting to occur. It's basically scar tissue forming so I try to roll on the foam roller once a day. I only do a few passes because my legs and back are still very sore and it hurts to roll. My bruises are fading. You can't really see them in that black and white photo, but they are a faded dark purple & blue color. My BF said it looked like I "fell off a motorcycle."
The scar under my right breast is healing beautifully. It's hard to tell anything happened there. Unfortunately all other scars aren't as inconspicuous right now. I am using scar cream on the left breast incision and scar away strips on the back and under my butt. I'm scared to put the strips on my breasts because the skin is stretched and feels a little thin there. I have a few more stitches that need to be plucked out on my lower back incision. I'm waiting on my BF to do it since he has steady hands. Be sure to get your stitches out because I've noticed that it will make your scar worse if you don't pull them out once you start healing. As soon as I removed the breast & butt ones, the scars started looking healthier almost instantly.
My throat is still affected by being intubated. While it doesn't hurt anymore like it did, I still get choked up sometimes when I am projecting. I'm a singer so there have been a few times where my voice completely gave out on me for a moment. It's healing but it is taking a little longer than I expected.
Signing off now. Let me know if you have any questions!
Numbness & Swelling & Lumps & Bruises
So I'm at the three week mark and these are the things I've begun to notice:
Now that a lot of the swelling has subsided, I've noticed that My breasts are basically numb, especially around the nipple area. I don't know when this will get better but I really hope soon because it basically hinders any kind of sensation I could have during sex, which is important to me. My nipples are also still inverted. They are slightly coming out every few days or so, but not a lot. I'm hoping they come out. Sex would be killed for me if they don't pop out. I need them!!!! I'm going to give it to the six week mark before I allow myself to become concerned enough to talk to Dr. Bednar.
THIGHS & BACK
The backs and side of my thighs are still slightly numb. My lower back is also mostly numb.
My breasts are still a bit swollen as is my lower back. My thighs are a little swollen but mostly back to normal.
I had lumps in my thighs and lower back, but I asked my boyfriend to massage them and those lumps are gone. He spent 15 minutes of gentle yet firm massage on each lump. My BF has strong hands and is very patient so if you ladies have husbands or partners who wouldn't mind spending time massaging you, then I would suggest going that route as opposed to spending hundreds of dollars on a massage elsewhere.
My arm is still bruised from the IV. It's getting better but still sore.
The bruises on my legs are getting better. They have almost completely faded.
The bruising on my lower back is completely gone.
That's all for now. My boobs are a bit smaller but I think that's due to less swelling. They are getting softer but they feel bloated. Will update next Friday at the one month mark!
Enjoy your weekend!
Photos, Almost 4 Weeks
I took these photos over the weekend. Just uploading here for comparison. Swelling in back and hips is going down. My breasts are a little smaller. The lipo areas still sting and are very sore like I am healing from injury.
VS for Sizing
Ok, so I went to Victoria's Secret this morning just to get my current sizing since I'm pretty much at the 1 month mark. I tried several online bra size calculators and with my band size of 30 and bust of 36, I kept getting recommendations for DDD, E and F sizes.
VS initially sized me at a 32 DDD. I tried on one of those bras and there was just a little bit of room at the top. She brought me a 34 DD and it fit my breasts perfectly, so that's where I am now.
It might be difficult to tell from the photos that I have a small frame, but the good news for me is that since I have some weight on me, my DD boobs look proportionate and natural. I was terrified of looking "done," so I'm happy where I am now. If I lose anymore I think I will still be ok with it, and I'm guessing I might drop to a D cup if I lose anymore fat -- which is still pretty awesome. :)
Will probably update again after my 1 month post op follow up with Dr. Bednar.
I am seeing many amazing results for the fat transfer. I'm so happy for you ladies and you look wonderful!