Hello! My surgery is on 09/30/2015 at Coral Gables...
Hello! My surgery is on 09/30/2015 at Coral Gables in Miami Florida with Dr. Ary Krau.
I have had such a terrible time with finding answers to all my questions so I am hoping I can make this to help others like me. Here goes...
I am 21 years old, I have never had any children or prior surgeries, I am 5'8, I am 175lbs.
I have broad shoulders, small waist, and big hips/thick thighs. I want breasts that are more proportionate but smaller than my butt because that is my signature "asset".
ABOUT MY BOOBS NOW:
I've never been properly measured but I am a 36(sometimes 38) B. I barely fit into the B but I am too much for an A. I've had the same bra for three years, it has been hell. I've included before photos. My left side is a bit higher than my right so I will most likely need two different size implants.
WHAT I WANT:
I would like my breasts to be fairly close together without needed a bra, natural cleavage. I would also like a nice slope to keep them as natural looking as possible. I may be odd but I really like breasts to "sag" a bit. I find they look more natural and have better movement.
WHAT I DO NOT WANT:
I do NOT want "basketball boobs" (for those who don't know, that's when it looks like two circles are protruding from your chest, also know as "pornstar boobs" and "stripper boobs". I also do not want perky boobs, as I stated, I like some sag. I do not want my collarbones to be besties with my implants.
I have some pretty bad anxiety about this and with each passing day, it gets worse. I am very very fearful of not waking up from the anesthesia and just dying. I have a little brother, and parents, and pets that I love who don't know about this because... Honestly... I am embarrassed of my current size and I don't want them to know about this. I struggle with the guilt of hiding it and I would hate for something to happen to me because I am "selfish".
I am also afraid of feeling things while I am under the anesthesia. I am afraid of getting capsular contracture or an infection. I am afraid I will f*** up my implants because I am prone to being nauseas/vomiting due to medications. I am also concerned about having implants that sit too high. I am also concerned about how much pain I will be in the days following surgery.
WHY A SIZE HAS YET TO BE DECIDED:
I am an out of state patient. So I haven't had the chance to try one any sizers yet. I will be doing this the day prior to surgery. With that being said... Pictures are f***ing misleading. I know for a FACT that I do NOT want smaller than 400cc's, I have not found any photos that I feel would be what I wanted under that size. However I have seen photos of 500ccs and 700ccs both silicone, both submuscular, that look THE SAME. Driving me crazy. I would not go larger than 700ccs, no way. My breast tissue is not bountiful enough and I am not about to sign up for back problems for the rest of forever. My coordinator thinks 500 would be too big for me, but I have had doctors say otherwise. I have yet to see my own doctor, and wont see him until the day of so I will be choosing my size with the coordinator. I'm nervous but my husband will be with me and he has no problem telling me if something looks ridiculous. I have faith that I'll pick the right size. Even if I feel after the fact that I went too small or have boob greed, after I have a child I plan on switching them out for bigger. So I'm prepared. At this time, my GUESS is I will be in the 550/600cc range. We will see...
Ten Days Until Surgery...
The anxiety caused by the fear of complications is strong today. My stomach is in knots.
I also want to note that I want to have my implants done subglandular, not submuscular for easier recovery but my coordinator said no. I will definitely be speaking to the doctor about this on the day of surgery.
Additional Pre-Op Boobie Info!
Something I failed to mention about my breasts before. My areolas (when not cold or aroused) are very puffy due to herniated tissue. I'm hoping the implants will make them look a bit more normal. I'm not looking for "perfection" but improvement would be nice.
Nine Days Preop...
As anticipated, nerves are worse.
I ended up having to take an 800mg ibuprofen last night due to very severe cramps. I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome as well as endometriosis. I know that between 10 and 14 days pre op you are supposed to stop all medications that potentially thin your blood but this was an emergency. I hope this doesn't negatively effect me :(
Eight Days Until Surgery!
The anxiety is about the same, I am still very scared. I make the final payment tomorrow.
As I mentioned yesterday, I had to take an 800mg ibuprofen the other day. The coordinator checked with the doctor and I'm all set. It should not effect me at all! :)
One week, can't sleep :(
This might be a pointless post but one week from today, I will be having surgery. I am excited but still so so nervous.
I've started to pack things away and went over my checklist. I hope I'm ready for this.
In exactly one week... I will have proportionate boobs! I feel a little better about things thanks to all the great people reaching out, especially the girls who have gotten theirs done by Dr. Krau.
Don't be fooled though, I will probably be freaking out as it gets closer! But for now, I am feeling better and I'm more excited.
Six Days Until Boobies!
Does anyone know if my husband can come in with me until I get the anesthesia? I'd feel more comfortable with him being there when I go to sleep.
Five Days Until Boobies!
My sleep schedule is so off. I end up awake until 4am and then I sleep until like 2 or 3pm. It's driving me nuts. I don't know if it's nerves or excitement but my flight is 7:55am Tuesday so this ish needs to stop.
Four Days Until Boobies!
I've packed as much as I can at this time and the rest will be done Monday. I still need to pick up a few things: Chapstick, laxatives, more ginger ale, etc. If there is anything I should be bringing please comment below!
Three Days... Relapsed Nerves.
I thought that the nervousness might be over but when I woke this morning, my stomach was in knots all over again.
So today I will running any and all last minute errands, getting a good nights sleep (hopefully), and then tomorrow morning I leave for Florida. Tomorrow is blood work and then Wednesday is the big day.
Still very nervous. Still a bit excited. Still very nauseous. Fingers crossed.
What a horrible day!
My flight was out of the wrong airport, luckily they were able to get my husband and I on another flight. However, I've apparently developed a sensitivity to flying. My poor stomach :(
My hotel is in a dodgy area and uber is sketchy but a godsend compared to taxis.
My preop went okay. I'm going with 600ccs as they were the most naturally proportionate to my body. This was the only good thing.
The paperwork was intimidating and the staff was friendly but I was not informed of all of the additional "fees". After being under the impression that the surgical bra and strap were included- this is not the case. I planned down to the penny so this hit me hard financially. Also I had been told my medication would be $65 it's actually $84. OI don't have enough so I'm struggling to get this filled. Surgery is tomorrow at 8:30pm and I'm more of a wreck than ever.
30 Sep 2015
Day of treatment
My surgery is way later than I had hoped. It's at 8:30 but I have to be there for 7. I had to stop eating/drinking at 10am. I'm so thirsty. And a bit hungry. I've gotten a migraine from it so I'll try to sleep more. I am still extremely nervous and I know that it will not subside. Wish me luck... I hope to see everyone on the other side!
ON THE OTHER SIDE!
This is going to be long, so bear with me!
The wait was LONG to be honest. It only made my nerves worse. When I was finally called in to the preop room, the wait was about an hour maybe less.
I finally met my doctor, bombarded him with a million questions, which he answered promptly. He tried to debunk my fears and he was very nice and efficient. It did seem slightly rushed.
I met with a nurse who was amazing. As well as a very caring anesthesiologist. They were the ones who really made me feel better. Apart from my husband. I wish I could remember their names.
The anesthesiologist took me to the operating room where she finished setting up, she then helped me get on the operating table and did everything in her power to keep me warm and comfortable. She then walked me through all the steps of the procedure and gave me my anesthetic, which I really don't remember getting.
Well being under the anesthetic I remember nothing I did not dream or anything.
Oh here's the part where he gets really difficult I don't mean to scare anyone but I'm gonna tell you exactly how I felt when I woke up. I woke up in the recovery room with two other girls were just been operated on who seem to be fine me on the other hand the reason that I woke up was because I was in excruciating pain. I was in so much pain that I could not speak properly in order to get the assistance I needed. I had to cry and whimper for help and I was ignored. when I finally did receive help they refused to give me morphine as they thought I was allergic even though I told him I was not. After a little bit more time crying and begging for help they went and got my medication from my husband. By this time he was outside the recovery room wanting to come in but was not allowed at that time. They gave me one Percocet and one muscle relaxer. This did not kick in until 30 minutes to 45 minutes later.
I was in release the war was still crying in pain and my cab was waiting outside. The cabdriver did everything in his power to try to avoid bumps in order to avoid me being in more pain.
By the time I was home I was very dizzy however not nauseous to my surprise as I am easily nauseated. I also surprisingly had my appetite. However I could not form proper sentences as my words were slurred and I was not making any sense.
My husband ordered food as well as picked up some light snacks from CVS. I ended up eating a bunch of weight for snacks as well as part of a Boston cream donut and a little bit of an eggplant calzone but it sucked so I didn't finish it. Well eating I was in and out of consciousness so when my husband would take my food away I snapped. I was most definitely not myself. you took care of me until we both fell asleep and he proceeded to wake me up when I need my medication. He is the best.
This brings us to today. I took two Percocet and I'm about to take my muscle relaxer or which will help with this tightness in my chest. my pain is tolerable at this point about a four out of 10 where the tightness in my chest is about a seven out of 10. Medication is your best friend, TAKE IT AS DIRECTED.
I'll keep everyone updated. I attached photos. However don't mind the stain. I spilled soup like a dumbass.
Two Days Post Op...
So I can't believe that I have not been nauseous yet -knock on wood- I'm the most nauseous person ever so this makes me happy. I have been able to eat normally since after surgery.
Apart from when I woke up from surgery my pain has been fairly tolerable. I've been taking my medication as close to the designated time as possible.
I do have bruising underneath my breast near the incisions but that's normal. The only problem or concern that I have is that near my incisions there is an indent was cause me to believe that I did have the double bubble. I promptly send photos to Dr. Krau and he said that this was not the case. The surgical bra I was given was too tight so Dr. Krau asked me to remove it. However I am still wearing the strap as it is needed to push down on the implants but it is not on tight as it is causing indents on top of my implants.
I am more sore but in less pain. And as anticipated I'm very constipated. Here are some photos from yesterday's follow up...
Photos from late last night...
Just some more photo progress.
Day Two Post Op (Evening)
All I did was walk outside (with a
Sweater of course!) and a cool breeze caused my entire chest to tighten. I did take a muscle relaxer but it isn't working!
Three Days Post Op...
I'm practically out of medication which is killing me because now I'm very very sore and also in a bit of pain. I feel as if my implants are going to rip out the bottom of my incisions. There is no visual proof that supports this, but it's what it feels like.
The soreness is in my chest, shoulders, armpits and lower back. I may have to start taking something like ibuprofen to assist a bit. I will keep you all updated!
What Is Happening?!?!
My implants feel like they are ripping through my incisions. Left breast is the worst however I'm right handed. The bruising is also more on the left as well. No matter how I sit or stand the bottom of my breast is digging into my incision which feels like it's ripping. My doctor said not to worry but it is NOT comfortable! Anyone else have this happen?
Four Days Post Op ...
I'm not that happy. I'm still in pain, the medication isn't helping anymore, I haven't pooped since Tuesday, and my boobs don't look as big as they did when I tried on the sizers. I'm starting to wish I went bigger. It's funny because originally I was going to do 400cc, but I ended up with 600cc and they still dont look proportionate to my body :(
My nipples are way more puffy than they were before surgery... Not happy about that. At all. But who knows, maybe it will change.
All of my bras don't fit, they scrape my incisions. So the dr. told me not to wear a bra at all. This is also super uncomfortable because it feels like my implants are going to fall out of my chest. I'm constantly putting my arm under my chest for support.
My left incision (super bruised) keeps getting sharp pains and I'll admit it hurts like a bitch. My right incision only hurts when I move certain ways. It's been pretty tough for me to do things for myself now that my muscle relaxer is gone. It was the only thing that was easing the pain and I definitely didn't have enough.
I showed the dr. my bruises, he said they were normal.
Five Days Post Op...
I did get more muscle relaxer which is good. Unfortunately I am not feeling much progress with it though.
The pain is fine unless I'm trying to sit up or walking around. I also keep getting electric shock pain in random spots at random times. Super uncomfortable.
Did ab enema yesterday and still couldn't poop so I'm still very bloated and backed up.
I know that time will bring better results but my implants just seem so much smaller than what I tried on.
Overall feeling pretty Blah.
Six Days Post Op...
Nothing new really except a sharp ripping pain (mostly in my left breast) in the outer side when I go from lying down to sitting and sitting to standing. On a scale of 1 to 10 it's a clear 9. I've also noticed my left breast has been extremely tight feeling. My doctor had told me after surgery no massage but massage is the only thing that has helped it not feel as tight. Still no bathroom use, still no dropping (as expected), nipples still ugly. I'll keep everyone updated.
One week post op...
I was generally okay with how the looked in person and in "selfies" (minus the ugly nipples) but in photos that my husband takes they look so HORRIBLE that I am sick to my stomach and disgusted by how uneven and just bad they look. And then I realized that's how they must really look. So I'm very depressed.
On top of that they are harder than before and I fear I might have capsular contracture.
I definitely regret spending $3500+ to do this....
Eight Days Post Op...
My chest got hot to the touch, my nipples were making a squish water sound and everything hurts to the touch as well. Definitely not a good day.
Ten Days Post Op...
Steri strips are starting to peel, less shooting pains but more tightness.
Yesterday my breasts were red, hot to the touch and squishy sounding, I iced for an hour and rubbed them a bit, now they are fine. Also had first bowel movement in 11 days. It was a horrible situation. Second worst moment in my life. No joke.
Nipples still feel sunburned. Some of my chest feels that way as the rest feels numb.
I'm able to sleep on my side with minimal discomfort as opposed to my back which is very painful. My cleavage is more pronounced and I believe it has something to do with sleeping on my side.
Today is the first day I feel okay enough to go out. So I will be shopping for sports bras as I have not been wearing any bra for days. Will update later.
Still 10 Days Post Op- UPDATE
Going out was a horrible idea. So not five minutes into walking around my vision was spotty and I was nauseous and dizzy. I sat with my husband at the food court of the mall for about a half hour and I tried again. I had to keep kneeling/crouching/sitting where I could in the stores I was in. My chest was tight and painful and to top it all off I see rippling on the outer side of both breasts. What a day. I ended up only able to try on one sports bra before I started getting tunnel vision and thought I was going to black out so we went home. My back is also killing me.
Bad day again.
Two Weeks Post Op...
So my right side feels like it's been dropping, occasionally sore. My left side is tight and in some pain.
Took my tape off, doctor says the incisions are healing excellent. I've included photos of the incisions but they appear to be upside down, not sure why.
I started working again, definitely tough getting back. I'm more fatigued than normal. Other than that, not much new.
Three Weeks Post Op.
So it's been three weeks.
My chest swells during the day, feels better when I shower at night. I'm still increasingly tired and get random pains here and there. My breasts appear small unless I'm wearing a bra, which upsets me. Trying to be patient.
Four Weeks Post Op (little late)
My breasts were getting softer but now they are hard again, numb underneath, and nipples hurt. Also my left ribs KILL when I lean or lift my arms.
They look so small in shirts unless it's a super super tight shirt OR wearing a padded wireless bra. So I'm still not happy.
5/6 Weeks Post Op
15 Nov 2015
2 months post
I'm a little over 5 weeks but not quite 6 weeks so here is my update:
My job is 8.5 hours 5 days a week and by half way through the day I have to unhook or completely take off my bra which is inconvenient. And embarrassing being I hate the way my chest looks in shirts with no bra.
My left nipple hurts often, not so much my right. No rib pain anymore. From half way through my nipples down either hurts or is completely numb.
Overall, I'm still not happy with the size. I fit into a C cup and still have empty space in the bra. With 600 ccs and starting out as a small B, this is pretty depressing. Also no cleavage without padding :(
25 Nov 2015
2 months post
So it feels weird sleeping on my side sometimes, but not painful at all. My left incision gives me pain occasionally. I have such discomfort wearing a bra, my boobs get red and swollen and I always need to end up taking my bra off at work.
I was measured at VS and they said I'm a 36 DD and maybe a DDD however their sizes are not true to other bras I have that fit better so I dont know. What I do know is, without a shirt I LOVE them. However... I don't walk around naked all the time and when I wear clothes... I HATE them. No cleavage at all in my bras. Some girls at work were talking bra sizes and they did. Not believe my size because they are
Smaller and have more cleavage. It's depressing. Still no bounce or jiggle which I expect. They may look great naked but they still dont match the sizers I tried with the bra :(
When I do "selfie" photos they look huge but it's misleading. They really aren't :(
Another update! Bra size!
27 Nov 2015
2 months post
So I got measured again - twice. I'm a 36 D... Barely :( it is so crazy how tiny they look in clothes. I'm tired of people saying I don't look big enough to be a D. It's depressing.
9/10 Weeks Post Op
I don't know how I messed up the weeks but I'm past 9 weeks but not 10 weeks yet (Wednesday will be.).
My left breast gets "zingers" all the damn time OR a consistent painful soreness that lasts an hour or so.
My right breast is fine.
No change aesthetically so I am not posting any photos.
Still battling the depression associated with my breasts being decent sized naked but with clothes I'm "small chested" according to others. I don't regret it because my breasts are bigger than they were before but they appear smaller than the sizers. I tried still. I know in a bathing suit I would be happy but I can't just wear a bikini top to work or out shopping.
11 weeks post op.
16 Dec 2015
3 months post
No visual changes so no photos.
No pain or zingers AT ALL in my right breast. My right breast feels good. It feels like part of me inside (not outside. Semi soft but definitely different)
My left breast feels terrible. I get pains all the time. And it just feels so foreign inside me. I am constantly adjusting it and moving it around to feel right again. So weird. I hate that feeling.
They both feel real if I'm leaned forward and will slightly jiggle.
While walking there's no noticeable jiggle.
While laying down they feel weird and stiff. I don't like that.
Still looks small with clothes on.
Still don't look like the sizers I tried.
11 weeks photo.
17 Dec 2015
3 months post
I feel like people don't follow or provide feedback or support as much if I don't upload a photo. So here.
12 WEEKS POST OP
24 Dec 2015
3 months post
I still have a weird balloon like feel on the inner part of my left breast when I move certain ways. Still have zingers and random pains in left and my right JUST started getting them as well! Merry Christmas to me :(
They still both swell up about half way through my work day from stress. They still are numb on occasion. The tissue under my nipples is often grossly distorted pushing my nipples into weird shapes so I'm often adjusting them.
They actually seem smaller each week and it's causing me great distress and severe depression.
I want them redone but I don't want the pain and bullshit all over again :(
Happy holidays everyone.
13 WEEKS POST OP
BOTH of my breasts hurt.
I can no longer sleep comfortably on my side/stomach due to my chest having this strange sore and electric feel. But I HATE sleeping on my back.
No change on how I feel about the size. No real change visually except on my left breast (my "problem breast") about an inch below my nipple there is an indent that was not there before. It's hard to see in photos but in person it can be seen.
Overall, still not happy.
I am getting increasingly stressed which is causing weight fluctuations and headaches.
Happy New Year :(
15/16 WEEKS POST OP
17 Jan 2016
4 months post
No visual changes.
Left breast still causes me severe discomfort and pain.
Right breast gives off an occasional zinger but other than that, nothing.
Emotionally I'm going through a tough time in my life and my dissatisfaction with my results just brings me down more.
21 WEEKS POST OP
I know I haven't posted in awhile but a lot was going on.
Visually there is no real change for the better. They appear even smaller. I've had to resort to wearing a push up bra daily just to feel better about myself.
The pain in my right breast is gone. I get a weird zing feel maybe once every week or so.
The pain in my left breast comes and goes. I definitely get pain once a day. It's just not as bad.
When I'm extremely stressed I can't wear any bras. My breasts swell and get uncomfortable.
I'm drunk. I'm miserable.
I hate my body. My boobs don't look good. They are so small. It's like they get smaller each week. A push up is my only friend. I hate them.
TWENTY NINE/THIRTY WEEKS POST OP.
24 Apr 2016
7 months post
The zingers have been going away finally. The left still gets them more frequently than the right.
Both sides still swell, get sore and hot when I'm stressed (halfway through my work day I am often loosening my bra).
They don't feel like they've gotten softer over the past couple months.
They only look big in a push up bra or a selfie (good angle), otherwise I'm still a little disappointed. Because of my broad shoulders, tallness, and curvy hips my chest just doesn't measure up. Obviously it's better than before... But I'm still not happy.
36/37 WEEKS POST OP
13 Jun 2016
9 months post
I haven't posted in awhile due to life events but I will bullet the information to make it easier:
* Nipples- Since surgery my areolas are puffier, making my nipples look flatter which I hate. I had my right nipple pierced 4 weeks ago (set further back than normal piercings) to create more of a nipple. This was effective. Though I don't love my nipples, the piercing helped. Pain wise I RARELY get zingers anymore but when I do, it's the left one.
*Satisfaction- I unfortunately cannot say that I'm happy because they are not as big as I wanted them to be. They only look good in a push up bra or if I take a selfie. Otherwise I am very depressed by how small they look.
43 WEEKS POST OP
27 Jul 2016
10 months post
I'm developing Symmastia and I'm freaking out. The doctor told me to buy the thongbra and wear it for 2-3 months to see if it helps. Otherwise a revision is needed. So of course I looked up Symmastia revisions and I'm freaking out MORE. I can't find ONE that looks normal after the revision. I'm having a complete mental break down. Not to mention I'm in awful pain from this.