So Ready for This 8/09/13- California, CA

I am a stay at home mama to four monsters. I have been married for 13+ years. I also have lost 75lbs in the last 3 years. I had a hysterectomy in August of 2010, and it was terrible. The pain and emotions that came along with that....all I can say I that I was not prepared for it. I am so ready to be a little selfish and have this surgery. I am doing a full tummy tuck and breast lift.

Wow...these photos make me sad. I like the way I look with clothes. And in the dark...haha. But taking a picture this close up is kind of a blow to my self esteem! Less than 2 weeks to go!

Getting anxious and excited. Got prescriptions and everything is all set.$ is paid and now it is just a waiting game.I don't have an actual time...the surgery center calls the day before. I keep worrying about the pain....I fear it will be awful....and other times I think it will be nothing compared to how awful my hysterectomy was. I had a 6 lb tumor removed, ovary and uterus. A Hip to hip incision, muscles cut and just so much pain!!! Could it b worse than that? It literally took me weeks to recover physically.

I feel really good. Surgery went well....had a UNkbown hernia and he repaired it. I'm keeping up on meds as well as drinking and eating. Today I cannot really complain...because I feel good. It is hard to lean forward because I have good posture and slouching drives me crazy! I am curious how one gets out of bed by themself. I had a breast lift and tummy tuck...and I cannot fathom being able to GET OUT of bed without my husband. Anyone have any tips on how to do this without help.

All is well in healing. I am able to stand straight up and it helps me back. I had a huge blood clot in my belly button...hurt to remove...I got all sweaty and had to sit down. I'm at a pain pill in morning (Tylenol with codeine) and at night along with a valium. My boobs are cute and tiny...but definitely need to be augmented in a few months. My stomach looks weird. I cannot tell how it will look in few months...but it is a little frustrating to have a big ol' belly with drains and tiny boobs. Drains should come out next Monday or Wednesday

So I'm 17 days today. I fought an infection and am still on antibiotics. I get tired so easily...but when I have a ton of energy I am so limited on movement. I have a hard time bending and picking stuff up. I am in a compression garment as of today. I'm liking my results...still going to get breast augmentation eventually. Hoping for Dec. I wish I had the energy and a Dr ok to workout. I get so bored. I go back in 2 weeks to get vertical stiches out. I am still disappointed that I have a vertical scar...but it Is still better than my before pictures.

Feeling great. Started arm work outs yesterday. I really wish I could do more and workout. I swear I am more critical of my entire body now. My thighs especially right now...I'm going to ask Dr if I can start the squat challenge.

My scar is pretty amazing all around...so tiny and not red. My vertical incision is still pretty awful. Part of me thinks if I had known prior to surgery about having to have a vertical, I would have not gotten the surgery done. One Side of the incision is tight and flat (too tight) and the other side if a chunk of flesh. It's ugly and I try not to look at it or I will cry.

I get frustrated because I DID NOT have a tummy tuck to lose weight or be slim. I did it to get rid of all that flesh that was a reminder of the person I once was. The fat mom. But wearing clothes is so frustrating because I look like there is no difference around the middle....oh and now I literally have no boobs. Basically I feel like I still look like a hot mess except I actually feel like shit some days because I am recovering from surgery.

I hope I get to the point of liking my results instead of being critical. Maybe time will tell...I go back on Monday.

Most days I am pissed I had my stomach done. My boobs are cute and perky and I am glad I went with the lift seperately. Augmentation is still not scheduled yet. My stomach is just a source of sadness for me most days. The center of my stomach is painful...if I even lay my kindle across it I feel a slight pain...what is that? My vertical scar is still red and ugly. But what bothers me the most is how swollen it is most of the time. Some nights I even feel like my incision is going to split open. I'm working out a good hour a day. Could this be a result of that? Who knows! I'm avoiding salt and now using turmeric daily. I didn't expect to have a tummy tuck and all the sudden have a perfect body. But I have one spot about 1x1inch above my incision that does not swell and makes me feel like THAT is how my whole stomach should have looked after surgery. It is flat and and tight. When I brought it up 4 weeks ago he said I should get lipo when I get boobs. That just made me feel shitty. I don't want lipo...I was using a tummy tuck as a solution for losing a ton of weight and my tummy flab was holding me back. Some days I regret my decision. I need to continue to work out and eat right. I go back to ps on Monday...hopefully he has some insight or solutions.