Removal After 3 Months - Best Decision Ever.

The boobs are 100% back to what they were, thankgoodness. And I have to say, I really think it's because I've been braless. I literally haven't worn a bra in weeks and I don't see that changing any time soon. I'll wear a sports bra to work out, but that's it. Right now daily bra wearing just seems too uncomfortable.

I'm still struggling with the fact that I ever did this to begin with a bit. It's still been kinda hard some days.

Mostly, it's taught me a lot about how messed up my ideas about relationships, and my willingness to please men is/was. And I know now, that even though I was getting boobs so that I could be happier with what I saw in the mirror, it was still very much for male approval and satisfaction.

I attract a lot of male attention, I don't think it's just because of my looks, but probably alot to do with how I carry myself and my personality. My sister also says that I "exude sex" - but I kind of think that's just part of who I am? I'm just a "sensual" person, and I think men, like dogs, sniff it out and pick up on it.

Mistakenly I confused lusty feelings with love feelings a few too many times. And for whatever shortcomings my parents passed onto me during my childhood I seem to only truly attract, and being attracted to the "wrong" kind of people. Although I will say that in the beginning they don't seem wrong at all. They seem perfect, to me and to everyone else they are kind, loving, happy charming people. But then, just as I get close, I'm able to see who they really are, slowly complements get mixed with criticism... nights out turn into perpetual nights in. Suddenly they do things "unintentionally" that make me jealouse, like a neighbour girl they can't stop talking about, or some girl who keeps "texting them"... And by then it's too late. I'm already under the "love spell" that relationships can put on us, and it's hard to get out or to protect myself. Without knowing it, everything they say just gets internalized, and I'm no longer good enough.

Because of this, I've taken an honest vow of singleness for now, until possibly forever. lol. There are clearly some parts that I'm missing that make me so weak and vulnerable to men, so desprate and needy for their approval and attention, and I don't want to be that girl.

I'm a very strong, independent full person on my own.

Yeah, I can have fun with boys, but being with one in a relationship is something I don't think I'll consider for years, or possibly ever. I know it's dramatic, but I don't think I'm going to take it to 30 if I keep getting close to boys who start out making me feel good, only to leave me in the end feeling like total [RS bleep].

My best friend the other day talked about her Uncle who's 57 and been a bachelor for life. She says he's the happiest guy she knows. He's a Lawyer, he plays golf all the time, and always has a tan from all the vacations he takes. :) So yeah, something to think about, because clearly me and relationships don't seem to be a healthy mix.

Aside from the singleness stance I've taken in my personal life, I've also made some other goals.

1) Get a killer job and make bank -- this one is well underway and I should be starting up soon.
2) Buy a nice single bedroom condo with pretty bath, kitchen, and big windows! -- must be near a big gym.
3) Make fitness even more of a priority than it was before, and that also includes making sure I eat right/enough.. I've always been an active person, but zoneing out into any kind of sport I think is going to be my saving grace in the aftermath of all this bewb stuff. If the rest of my body is hot, I'll give even less of a [RS bleep] about my boobs/the stupid ass scar lol.
4) Slowly regain more normalcy with friends/family... I've been a total spaz all summer, and I'm still struggling with being a normal person at times, because I'm rather bitter and mad at the world :D. Hopefully I can learn to change that.
5) Keeping up with my new found spa-addiction, and trying taking good care of my skin.

Anddd... that's all I got.

So things are pretty good. The boobs are pretty much what they were, I think mostly the just need to brighten up a wee bit, and my boob skin needs to soften.

Also, I pulled my right stich a little this past week at work, I reached for something high, and thought I was in the clear, but guess not.

It's about the size of the head of a sewing needle, and I know it's just a superficial tear and will heal and close soon -- but it was enough to set off a mini break down.

I'm just not used to feeling this fragile, I'm not used to feel like I can't move my body freely and it's really upsetting.

I think full incion healing really takes 6 months to a year, soo I'm going to be super careful about the way I move my body --- especially my arms.

Oth than that, I have to be honest in saying that going braless has had a positive effect on my boobs. With my incisions right on my bra line everything is uncomfortable and runs the wrong way. I just feel like I heal better and feel better without one. Soo I might keep up going braless for a little while and see how it goes. I've found baggy graphic t's and button downs to be invaluable in that way.

Also I tried like every brand of sillicone strip or steri steril imaginae, but they all irritate my skin. Soo the most I can do is put some gauze over my incions if I have to wear a bra for a few hours, I'm pretty upset about this.

Would love to just be able to throw on one of my old bras and go on with the important things in life, but my incisions are too weak right now.

While I totally accept the cute little smudges in my crease, I think it might be fun to see how well I can treat them.

There is so much out there that doesn't work, and I'm pretty partial to science.

This method seems to absolutely work, but it takes time, you have to do it every day, and make it part of your routine.

I spoke to a very nice women who works for SkinBiology and she said she used this treatment on her husband. Attached are pictures from the day of his procedure, and a year after with treatment.

1) What she suggested is that for a month and half I do this;
That I use a thin later of Super GHK Serum toped with a layer of Emu Oil twice a day.

2) From there she said I could move on to the standard method of blemish removal found on their site. Found here. http://reverseskinaging.com/scars.html

Remember, the key is to go gentle and slow, the skin can only regenerate so quickly.


General info on skin blemishes;
http://www.scar-reduction.com/copper-peptides-scars-blemishes.html

Where to buy these products;
http://store.reverseskinaging.com/Super_GHK_Copper_p/61.htm
http://store.reverseskinaging.com/Emu_Oil_for_Skin_p/81s.htm


** In saying that, I also want to make it clear that there is totally nothing wrong with any of our marks, treated or untreated. They're cute, they're pretty little marks! They remind us every time we begin to pick ourselves apart that we're beautiful just the way we are, and that we must be kind and loving to ourselves-- always!. [RS bleep]