I Look Different, Not Better

I have deep set, hooded eyes, with thick eyebrows. Growing up I was always told I had beautiful eyes and beautiful eyebrows. In my early 30's I went to a makeup artist to make me up for my sister's wedding. When she finished, I thought the eyebrows looked a little too thick, and so I asked her to fix it. It never occurred to me, being that she was a makeup artist, that she didn't know what eyebrow shape would be best for me. She proceeded to pluck my eyebrows. But instead of taking a few hairs just to open the eye area, she completely transformed the shape of my brows. The new shape made my brows look more hooded, and I no longer looked like myself. My eyebrows never grew back to their natural state and I couldn't live with the unattractive heavy, hooded lids that were left behind. I came to the conclusion that I needed a brow lift, so I went to a plastic surgeon who said I didn't need a brow lift, but instead botox. After that, I decided that maybe it was just the excess skin on my lid that was bothering me, so I had upper eyelid surgery instead. Overall, it went well, but I didn't realize that this procedure would pull my eyebrows down and decrease my lid space. For many years that followed, I had a grumpy look due to the low brows and people were always asking me if I was upset or something was wrong. I finally decided that what I needed in the first place was the brow lift, so I started seeing plastic surgeons to decide what type if brow lift would be best. Because I'm now in my mid 50s, I have a large forehead, and my hairline has receded a little, the trichophytic brow lift seemed to be my best option. The downside to the procedure is a large scar across the hair line and a little bit down the temples. Thank goodness the procedure went well, except for the fact that I repeatedly told the surgeon that I wanted "subtle" lift, and to only lift the amount I had lost from the upper blephoplasty. Unfortunately, we never came to an agreement on exactly how much to lift, in other words we never discussed exact measurements. In hindsight, I realize that the surgeon was not very good at asking me any questions, and always did most of the talking. Everything he said came from a generic, "this is how it's done" perspective. Looking back, I believe my consultation was not thorough enough. Probably because the consultation was free, and surgeons can't afford to spend too much time with you if they aren't getting paid for that time. The result of my brow lift Is that he lifted too much and that the scar is taking longer to heal than the six weeks he promised. It is really closer to a full year to be fully healed. I received no scar care instructions from his office, and struggle with extreme numbness throughout my entire crown area and hyper sensitivity in the areas adjacent to the crown. It feels like I'm wearing a painfully heavy helmet all the time that cannot be removed. All the scar creams I try are always gooping up in my hairline, and I can't find a good way to fix my hair because of it. But the worst part of it all, is that he never told me how the procedure would affect the shape and overall look to my eyes. My eyes now have a very visible crease with lots of space between the lash line and the crease. The scar from my previous upper bleph are now visible, but they hadn't been before. Those scars are not even and give one eye a different shape than the other. The first impression I had of myself when the swelling went down after the brow lift, is that I now look a little bit like I have down syndrome. I don't mean to offend anyone by saying this, but its the only way I can describe how extremely different my eyes look compared to before the procedure. I completely regret everything about this procedure. I was supposed to look "younger" and more "refreshed," but I actually look older with hollow sunken in eyes. I see people with eyes that are a little pudgy at the brow or even hooded, and find them very attractive. I miss my eyes before this procedure. There was nothing wrong with my eyes or my brows to begin with. My mistake was not accepting myself the way I am, and putting my trust in professionals. They are just people who have a skill and are hired for that skill, regardless of how the outcome might turn out.