18 Year Old In Pain - Bend, OR

Warning! Extremely long text post. (Sorry...

Warning! Extremely long text post. (Sorry everyone!)

I remember the moment when it came to my attention that I needed to start wearing bras. I was in the fourth grade, and I was trying on shirts at a clothing store with my mother, and I came out of the dressing room to show her the shirt I tried on, and the first thing that came out of her mouth was, 'You need to start wearing bras'. Instead of being excited to start wearing bras like most young girls are, I was absolutely mortified. My mother who, at the time, refused to talking to me about me wearing bras, was suddenly doing exactly that. My mother took me to get measured because she knew that I was beyond a training bra, and we found out that I was a B cup. In fourth grade, I went from no bra, straight to a B cup. While I was in fifth grade, I noticed that my bras were too small. I had 'boob pockets' as I like to call them (when you have too much boob and they spill out over the top), and my bras were offering me little support which was causing me pain. My mother took me back to be measured, and we found out that I had quickly advanced from a B cup to a D cup all within one school year. My mother and I quickly worked a plan out (that we still use to this day), where right before the school year starts when Nordstrom's has their Memorial Day sale, she and I would go because that was the only time we could afford to by me my bras who's prices were quickly increasing. Right before sixth grade started, my mother and I went on our annual 'trip', where we then found out that I had once again increased in bra size, and I was now a DD. Two of my most prominent breast related memories happened while I was in sixth grade. One day I was working in a group with a boy in my class, and in the middle of class he turned to me and said, 'I bet when you're older you'll be in Playboy because of how huge your tits (his words, not mine. I hate that word) are. I can't wait to see you in it. I really want to touch and squeeze your boobs.' I was completely shaken up by what the boy said and I wanted to cry, but I never told anyone about it because I thought that having big breasts meant having to deal with rude, hurtful, and inappropriate comments like that and that I would just have to deal with it. And honestly, I wasn't too far off. The second most prominent memory was graciously given to me by the same boy who I just mentioned. When he and I were working together again in class, he turned to me and said, 'I love watching you in gym class because your tits (his words again) bounce so much'. Once again, I was extremely hurt by his comment but I brushed it off. At that time, finding good sports bras that fit my twelve year old body but gave me enough support for my DDs was near impossible, so I'd frequently have to wear my 'every day bra' even while doing physical activities. By seventh grade I was spilling out of my bras in every way possible, so my mother once again took me back to be re-measured, where I found out I had become a DDD. At this point, I was already trying to do whatever I could to hide my breasts, who were even bigger than most of the female teacher's at my school. I was the kid who everyone knew because of my breasts. During most of eighth grade, I was lucky to where I didn't notice much growing in my breasts. I was hoping that they wouldn't grow much more, even though I still had about another five years of 'possible growth period'. Sadly, they didn't keep their DDD size. By freshman year of high school, I had leapt to a 32/34G cup, where I have been for the last four years. Since the beginning of middle school, I haven't been able to wear a swim suit. My shirts make my 5'5'', 135 pound frame look much heavier than what it is because of my breasts (if that even makes sense). Finding clothes is near impossible. I've never had more than two bras at a time because they cost a minimum of $100 each. I've been marked as a sl*t and stuck up wh*re by everyone around me just for my big breasts. And for most of my life since I started developing, I've been in constant pain. I've been to physical therapy twice because of the strain on my shoulders/collar bones that my breasts are so generously contributing to. I suffer from constant neck pain that never goes away. My whole back just screams at me all day. And then I have all the marks from my bras. I've started to wear my normal bra with a sports bra on top of that every day just so I can get the support I need and to help take a small amount of pain off when I do small every day tasks such as going down stairs. Even when I wear just my normal bra, I'm in immense pain, but due to how heavy my breasts are, it hurts too much to not wear a bra. At night I frequently hold my breasts now (when not wearing a bra) just to take the pain off of my shoulders for a few short minutes. It's gotten to the point now where sleeping without a bra is very hard for me, because when I lay down (no matter if I'm on my side or back), they pull and are so heavy to where they're getting more painful every night. The pain I get from the wiring in my bra is great, because it lays right where my body bends. I get chafing due to the constant rub between my breast tissue and ribs, and its always very red after I take my bra off. And when I sit at tables or desks, my breasts are always touching the table top even when I'm sitting straight as possible (which I also can't do for more than a few minutes because of the pain). Even breathing has become difficult. And exercising or doing any physical activity (even my beloved bicycling) is damn near impossible. Because of all of this, over the course of the past year(ish) I have brought up my liking of getting a breast reduction to my mother (I've been thinking about it since middle school). At first she wasn't thrilled about it, but over the past few months, my pain has gotten much worse, to where she has gotten 'on board' with my idea. The sad thing is, is that I am currently in Japan as an exchange student. I arrived in Japan last August, and I will return to America in the beginning of this August, so I have a little over forty days left until I return. However, I have started doing intense research, and I frequently send my mom links and information (from RealSelf haha) so that she knows as much as possible about everything. I have even started taking notes in a word document so that I can send it to her. She has agreed that when I come back, she'll take me to try and start the whole breast reduction process as soon as possible (thank you so much mum!). However, I'm quite worried that I will be constantly denied from our insurance company, resulting in me not being able to get a reduction since I can't pay out of pocket. I'm also worried that my breasts aren't big enough to be eligible for a reduction, despite their G size. I'm also worried that (even though I turn 19 in four months), no doctor will want to operate on me and tell me to come back in five years. If our insurance plan does cover a medically needed breast reduction, I'm worried that they'll want me to take physical therapy (it'd be my third time for back/shoulder pain alone) for three plus months, which mean that I'd have to wait even longer to remove these things. I have so many worries and I'm so scared that I'll never be able to get this operation! What was your process like? Did you have any problems or do you have any advice?
Oh! Also, do you think the doctor or hospital would make me wait a certain amount of time after returning to America because I've been living in Japan for a year? (Does that even make sense?)
Another thing. I cannot confirm this until I talk to my primary care doctor, but looking at doctors from RealSelf's website, it seems that there are very few doctors in my city who can preform a breast reduction. This is making me wonder if I would have to go to Portland, OR (most of the big cities in my state are about three to four hours each away from my city by are) to receive the operation (IF I get approved and everything). Has anybody else had to do a similar thing? If so, what was your experience with that?

Side note: I don't care about the scars. I just want to feel comfortable again and without pain. I want to know what it's finally like to not wear a bra that has three or four hooks, and what it's like to be able to buy a cute bra. And what it's like to buy a bra under $100 dollars, and have the bra in store or not needing to go to a places that specifically carries sizes for bigger girls. If any of that makes sense... Sorry, I rambled.

Another side note: I'm also worried that I don't have grooves or indentations on my shoulders, and that would not make it possible for me to get a reduction...
Also, after taking pictures of my breasts and looking at them, I've just realized how much bigger my right breast is to my left...

(The cost I entered is just a random estimate by the way since I have yet to speak with anyone)

I'm so sorry by the length of this post!! Thank you so much for everything girls. You all have really helped me, even without knowing it! (Thanks to RealSelf and all of your stories, my mom has become more understanding and ok with my want of a reduction, so thank you!)

Questions on Insurance

So I am returning to the States next week after my year abroad (so many mixed feelings). But I am excited because that means that I can finally start trying to peruse a breast reduction, however I feel like my mother has started to become unsure about me getting one mainly because of the whole insurance process because I feel like she doesn't really understand how to start applying for a reduction. I've tried sending her information about how to start the 'application process' (i.e. go to your primary care doctor and tell them you want a breast reduction) and that your doctor (if they think you're a good candidate) will help put your case together and send the documentation and everything off to your insurance company, but I still feel like she doesn't understand the whole process. Reading what plastic surgeons here on RealSelf have said, usually you need to have experienced back/neck/shoulder pain (all of which I do), indentations in your shoulders due to your bra, have gone to physical therapy for three(ish) months to help show that your back/neck/shoulder pain is not due to weak muscles, etc. to help get approved. Before I left America last August, I had been going to physical therapy for 6-8 months to help strengthen the tendons in my knees (from past injuries), but my physical therapists ended up adding exercises for my shoulders and back due to the pain that I experience in them. I'm hoping I can use that to my advantage during the application process, but we'll see. Anyways! I was wondering if you wonderful ladies could share with me how exactly you started your breast reduction process (for insurance to help cover) and that whole process if that makes any sense. What were the 'requirements' for your insurance company to cover your reduction, how much of the surgery did they cover, what was your 'starting size', how long did you have to wait, were you rejected, etc. This could help me so much if you're willing to share! Thank you so much ladies!

Primary Appt.

Hey everyone! I've been back in America for a little over a month now and I've had so much to do since returning, but I just scheduled an appointment with a primary doctor about an hour ago! She (the doctor) had an opening for tomorrow, but my mother couldn't make it so I scheduled an appointment on the 27th of this month! Since I turned 18 while I was overseas, I had to find a new doctor for 'adults' and schedule a new patient appointment. I'm a little worried that she won't even listen to anything about a reduction because of my age (let alone that I'm bringing up a reduction on my first appointment with her), but I guess I won't know until the appointment day. Wish me luck and I'll keep you updated!

Quick Update

Ok, so this is going to be a really quick update (I'll explain more in the next post), but I have my consultation with a plastic surgeon in about two hours! There's been a lot of crazy/bad things that have come up in the past week so I decided to cancel my appointment a few days ago due to what has come up. But after talking with my mom she wanted me to call the plastic surgeon's office back and see if I could set up another consultation. Well I found out this morning that they ended up not canceling my appointment! Which I'm insanely happy about because now I don't have to wait another month and a half for a consultation. But now I'm really worried because I'm afraid that I'll forget to ask him (the surgeon) something since I originally though that I wasn't going to be able to see the surgeon. I'll start making a quick list now! Wish me luck!
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