Tummy Tuck......a word that has been on my brain for years and I mean YEARS. I have two children ages 9 and 7. With my first pregnancy I gained 75 (OMG) pounds. I never lost it and then gained another 25lbs with my second. The 25lbs from my second pregnancy came off pretty quickly. The first 75lbs well that was entirely different beast. It took my high blood pressure and crazy sugar to finally get with it and loose the weight. Loosing that weight was a long hard battle and after 4 years I had lost a total of 85 pounds!!! Two years later I have kept that off and run a 1/2 Marathon (which was on my bucket list;) Go Me.
So now for another thing on my bucket list. The Tummy Tuck. Like I said all throughout my weight loss journey my stomach has been my eye sore. I LOATHE my stomach. I am the most self conscious of my stomach. I don't like looking at my stomach. Ever. You get my drift the stomach has to go. On my bucket list I said I wanted it gone by the time I turn 35. Well guess what. 35 for me is in August so it's about that time.
Side Note: Praise the Good Lord for a supportive husband. He knows my insecurities and is with me but not pushing it in anyway. In his words.....He'll love me if I have the TT done and He'll love me if I don't. I do Love that man:)
ANYWAY back to me and the TT. We have the $$, I have the time at work, my kids are pretty independent, and I have the support of my awesome hubby. We set up a consult with Dr. Pittman in Athens GA and he was fantastic. I had done enough searching and googleing and MedMding to be a plastic surgeon myself so I more or less knew what to expect. What I didn't expect was how I would FEEL when he grabbed that hunk of flab that he called my stomach. Oh My Gracious the humiliation, anxiety, and sheer embarrassment I felt was excruciating. I wanted to DIE. Right there in his floor I wanted to die. That is how I know for sure that I want this. No I NEED this done.
After all of the 101 Q and A session I put that sweet man through it was time to go to the patient coordinator to set everything up or discuss the $$ part. This is when I started having second thoughts. Well I can't say second thoughts because I KNOW without a shadow of a doubt that I want this done but Guilt. EXTREME Guilt. Why was I going to butcher myself voluntarily. Who does that?!!! WHY in this world would I spend that kind of money on my stomach?! I can think of 1,000 other things that I can do with that money (my kid's travel ball, my daughters clothes (did I mention shopping is a problem for me?) and horse riding, my hubby's jeep lift and tires, getaway trips....the list goes on). Even with all of these thoughts in my head my husband said now or never (he can totally read my mind;) So I wrote that check(OMG non refundable deposits so this is now FOR REAL) and set the date. On my way home I could not shake the guilt feeling. It would NOT LEAVE ME ALONE. So I do what many of us would do.....I called my Momma! She put it the best and I Love her for it. I told her the guilt that I was feeling. She said what would you do with that money if you were handed it right now. I listed to her all of the reasons above. She said (this is big) What in that list included something for YOU?! You sacrifice everyday for your family. You put them before yourself everyday. The money that you all have spent on hubby's boat, jeep, kids activities etc is way more than this procedure ( I love how she called it a procedure. Really Momma? I'll be cut in half but call it a procedure if it makes you feel better;). That Momma of mine is some kinda pep talker. I love you Mommy:) Don't get me wrong I still feel a little selfish getting this and I don't know that it will go away but really. It's me time and I have worked so so SO hard to get where I am.
After all is said and done, April 7th it is. I have pre op next Thursday and The Day is the Monday after. Stay Tuned.....
So now for another thing on my bucket list. The Tummy Tuck. Like I said all throughout my weight loss journey my stomach has been my eye sore. I LOATHE my stomach. I am the most self conscious of my stomach. I don't like looking at my stomach. Ever. You get my drift the stomach has to go. On my bucket list I said I wanted it gone by the time I turn 35. Well guess what. 35 for me is in August so it's about that time.
Side Note: Praise the Good Lord for a supportive husband. He knows my insecurities and is with me but not pushing it in anyway. In his words.....He'll love me if I have the TT done and He'll love me if I don't. I do Love that man:)
ANYWAY back to me and the TT. We have the $$, I have the time at work, my kids are pretty independent, and I have the support of my awesome hubby. We set up a consult with Dr. Pittman in Athens GA and he was fantastic. I had done enough searching and googleing and MedMding to be a plastic surgeon myself so I more or less knew what to expect. What I didn't expect was how I would FEEL when he grabbed that hunk of flab that he called my stomach. Oh My Gracious the humiliation, anxiety, and sheer embarrassment I felt was excruciating. I wanted to DIE. Right there in his floor I wanted to die. That is how I know for sure that I want this. No I NEED this done.
After all of the 101 Q and A session I put that sweet man through it was time to go to the patient coordinator to set everything up or discuss the $$ part. This is when I started having second thoughts. Well I can't say second thoughts because I KNOW without a shadow of a doubt that I want this done but Guilt. EXTREME Guilt. Why was I going to butcher myself voluntarily. Who does that?!!! WHY in this world would I spend that kind of money on my stomach?! I can think of 1,000 other things that I can do with that money (my kid's travel ball, my daughters clothes (did I mention shopping is a problem for me?) and horse riding, my hubby's jeep lift and tires, getaway trips....the list goes on). Even with all of these thoughts in my head my husband said now or never (he can totally read my mind;) So I wrote that check(OMG non refundable deposits so this is now FOR REAL) and set the date. On my way home I could not shake the guilt feeling. It would NOT LEAVE ME ALONE. So I do what many of us would do.....I called my Momma! She put it the best and I Love her for it. I told her the guilt that I was feeling. She said what would you do with that money if you were handed it right now. I listed to her all of the reasons above. She said (this is big) What in that list included something for YOU?! You sacrifice everyday for your family. You put them before yourself everyday. The money that you all have spent on hubby's boat, jeep, kids activities etc is way more than this procedure ( I love how she called it a procedure. Really Momma? I'll be cut in half but call it a procedure if it makes you feel better;). That Momma of mine is some kinda pep talker. I love you Mommy:) Don't get me wrong I still feel a little selfish getting this and I don't know that it will go away but really. It's me time and I have worked so so SO hard to get where I am.
After all is said and done, April 7th it is. I have pre op next Thursday and The Day is the Monday after. Stay Tuned.....
