At 46, Tired of Feeling I Have to Say, "Yes, I Am His Mommy...I Just Had Him Later in Life" - Asheville, NC

I spent my 20's and 30's beating up my body and entire self with too much sun, a pack a day smoking habit, a high stress job, caring for a terminally ill parent and a very sad marriage. By the time, I approached 40, my life had changed, significantly, for the better. Happy remarried, pursuing a new career, running marathons and living a healthy life was reflected in my body and spirit. But the damage to my skin, especially in my face, could not hide the past.
A few years later, I was blessed with my son, and I was never happier, until I felt like the really, really, really old mom at daycare pick up. Despite being in good shape, at nearly 47, I was mistaken more than once for being in my 50s, and I just wanted to look my age.
Two years ago, I began planning a lower facelift/mini lift.
After interviewing 4 doctors, 2 local and 2 out of state, over a one year period of time, I selected Dr. Harley. My consultation with Dr. Harley was brief, only because I had already interviewed the other 3 doctors. Two of the doctors (one local and one out-of-state) wanted to add lower blephs and other procedures, and one local doctor said to wait, but wanted to sell me on more fillers. I used her services for fillers in the past. BTW, I know I will need to use fillers moving forward...my motivation for this procedure was to remove the jowls and turkey neck -- but volume will always be an issue for me.
I had the consult in August, made the decision by October -- after beginning the conversation with my husband 'hey, do you think you could watch our son for a few days'? My husband is pretty amazing, trusted my diligent research on the procedure and agreed to do 'whatever' if he thought it would make me happy. My husband is the only person who knows I did this. People are funny about plastic surgery and passing judgement on those who choose paths other than what they consider the 'norm'.
The procedure was scheduled (in October) for April 3rd, 2018. I am 10 days out and, honestly, really happy. I am keeping the 'Not Sure' on this review until swelling is reduced, and some time has passed.
But to all of you planning on seeing Dr. Harley in the future, I want to share HOW I did it, so that it was as discreet as possible and as affordable as it could be. So many past reviews helped me piece together my travel plans, and I want to help those considering his service by offering up my experience.
I used Lisa at Care Car. I had no idea she could provide a full service experience (thank you to 'frred' who mentioned this service in her post). I flew in, alone, on Monday evening. Lisa picked me up from the airport. It was so nice to have someone familiar pick me up, and I was staying with Lisa for 5 days. Lisa converted her home so that the lower level acts as a 2nd home within her home. It is completely private with a private walkout to a scenic patio/backyard, huge bedroom, bathroom, living area (with a huge TV, Internet access and a comfy recliner and couch), full kitchen and dining area. She charges a very affordable daily rate which is comparable to some of the lower priced Asheville hotels -- but you get a house when you stay with Lisa. We arranged for Lisa to take me to pick up my prescriptions which Juanita had dropped off as well as to the grocery store to pick up the foods I needed for the 5 days I as staying with her. We did all of this on the way home from the airport. Make a list for simple, low-sodium foods like yogurt, soup, avocado toast, eggs, milk, coffee (she has a Keurig), sugar if you need it. Also, to save nearly $40 on your prescriptions, find out from Dr. H's office the prescriptions they will give you. Download GoodRX on your phone and get the discounts. I pretty much used the money I saved on the prescriptions to buy food for 5 days!
On Tuesday morning, Lisa drove me to the procedure. I was calm. I met with the very nice and humble Dr. Harley, and for a few minutes we chatted. I took the drugs, and I was out until the end of the procedure. I think I was exhausted by the fear in the days leading up to this journey that my body knew I reached the end and it was time to relax. So, in my puffy face mask, I went back to Lisa's home. She helped me throughout the day. Lisa does not require a 24 hour minimum of care. This is KEY, and could save you hundreds of dollars. I do not remember much about the day of the procedure as I slept nearly all day. Lisa drove me back the next morning to remove the bandages (I did not have a drain).
I spent Wednesday and Thursday sleeping on and off. By Friday, I felt better and led a conference call for work -- but I would not have been able to go sight-seeing like some of Dr. Harley's patients are able to do. I took the pain medications the first few days and then only at night through Saturday. Lisa checks on you, via text, every morning to see if you need anything. I could not have asked for a more discreet, convenient and affordable experience than staying at Lisa's and having her a flight of stairs or a text away. I was left alone but never alone and felt so safe in her care and in her home.
On Saturday afternoon, Lisa drove me to the airport and I flew home. It is tiring (and not advised) to fly so soon after this procedure. But, the flight is short, and I needed to get home to my family. I spent Sunday and Monday continuing to recover at home. On Tuesday, after my local dermatologist said she would not remove the stitches -- she agreed to before the surgery, but when I called to confirm the appointment (and cost) she said she would never do that and referred me to a local plastic surgeon. Annoyed, I went to a new urgent care in the area in need of new business. The doctor there was a GEM! He complimented Dr. Harley's work and stitching and spent a lot of time removing them gently. I told him I couldn't feel anything, so go to town...but he was careful. He spent an hour with me and only charged me a little more than a basic visit. So, if you plan on getting this procedure and cannot stay in Asheville to get your stitches out, do a little pre-planning as this might have been the most stressful part of my experience.
Today is day 10, I feel about 80%. I wear the mepitac tape 24/7, and the area behind my earlobes is still really sensitive (painful). I also continue to sleep at a 45 degree angle and will for at least another week. I work from home, but will see clients next week. Picking up my son is done on an as-needed basis, and I have to be really careful so as not to strain my neck. Turning my neck from side to side is done very slowly (like when driving). I will not run for at least another couple of weeks. I walked 2 miles today with no additional swelling, so things are improving.
I ran into a former neighbor the other night. She hadn't seen me in 7+ years. She asked me a question I will never forget "how is it that you do not age?" It was the first time since turning 40 that I feel like I look good for my age. For me, for now, I am really happy. But, I am also super crazy busy with work and family, so if you have any questions or are looking for updates, it may take me some time to get back on here. But, I will try.